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[vicissitudes]

anymore input appreciated!

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=93906153&postcount=12444

First mistake:

Texted her later that night
Me: Hello, it's ***** from finance, if you want to come library sometime just let me know
Her: Ok, thanks

Girls will not take the initiative and contact you, especially not shy girls or attractive girls. She is not ever going to text you and ask you to go to the library. You need to invite her to go and set up a date and time.

Second mistake:

Next day (Saturday)
Me: Hey, I will go at 5 to work on my other assignment, but feel free to come along and I can show you finance then
Her: I'm sorry. Today, I'm, preparing the vivo voce for this monday. Maybe next time. Anyway, thank you
Me: No problem. Good luck! Just let me know whenever
Her: I feel lucky to meet you. See you next time.

You gave her one specific date and time, with almost no notice. The chances that she's free and down to see you are very, very slim. Never do this if you want to maximize your chances of seeing her.

At this point, your chances aren't great because you both go home this week. Even if you get her to see you, it's hard to follow that up because you will be away for an extended amount of time, and you lose momentum. Your best chance is probably to try again next semester. Wait a week or two, then either do this in person or over text:

"Hey, how's class going for you?"
"Yeah I'm not sure about this one thing too. We should study sometime. When are you free this week?"

Also feel free to pursue other girls so you're not just hung up on her.

 

[Go_Ly_Dow]

First mistake:



Girls will not take the initiative and contact you, especially not shy girls or attractive girls. She is not ever going to text you and ask you to go to the library. You need to invite her to go and set up a date and time.

Second mistake:



You gave her one specific date and time, with almost no notice. The chances that she's free and down to see you are very, very slim. Never do this if you want to maximize your chances of seeing her.

At this point, your chances aren't great because you both go home this week. Even if you get her to see you, it's hard to follow that up because you will be away for an extended amount of time, and you lose momentum. Your best chance is probably to try again next semester. Wait a week or two, then either do this in person or over text:

"Hey, how's class going for you?"
"Yeah I'm not sure about this one thing too. We should study sometime. When are you free this week?"

Also feel free to pursue other girls so you're not just hung up on her.

will do! thanks for the input.

 

[vicissitudes]

will do! thanks for the input.

No problem. Good luck to you

 

[Kung Fu Jedi]

So, my year recap, even though I've only been posting in here from time to time over the past few months.

2013 has been a long and shitty year in many way. Five days in, my father passed away after suffering a stroke right before Christmas last year. In February, the woman I'd been dating for two years broke up with me. It was over due and we both knew it wasn't working out, but it didn't make it easy. A month or so later I found out she was bipolar and going through an episode for the first time in 20 years. Not long after that she went missing for a week, which even though we weren't together any more, still left me worried sick. She eventually turned up, in a hospital and after a few weeks was allowed to come home. Over the course of the summer, I saw her regularly as she began a long road to recovery. It was hard to watch her struggle. In August, my 18-year old cat passed away. I know some would say that he was just a pet, but after so long in my life, it was tough to say goodbye and I still miss him. In October, my mom was diagnosed with cancer, which was just icing on the cake for such a crappy year. I'll be happy when 2013 is behind me in a few weeks.

But on the other hand, I met the woman that I believe I'll spend the rest of my life with. I know I've told this story in here before, but just in case you've missed it, here goes. In July, I traveled to Australia for a trip into the deep outback. After a 16-hour flight to Brisbane, I left the international terminal for the Domestic one, and while waiting for a bus to shuttle me there, I struck up a conversation with a very attractive young lady waiting for the same bus. She was from the States too and in Oz to go diving on the Great Barrier Reef. We chatted for an hour or so while we waited for our respective flights, but before we went our separate ways, I gave her my business card.

Following each of our vacations, we returned home, me to Austin, TX, her to Nashville, TN. I got an email from her a week or so after I was back and we began corresponding. Writing at least one long email each day, we began to get to know one another. In August, she came to visit me and we had an amazing time. A few weeks later, we got together in Little Rock for a long weekend together, and not long after that I went to Nashville to see her again. From there, we've been seeing each other about every two weeks, sometimes in Nashville, sometimes in Austin and we even went to Disney World together in November. We had our own personal Christmas last weekend, and after the actual Christmas is over, I'm heading to Nashville to celebrate her birthday and New Years with her as well. I'm making plans to move there in the first half of next year and we're already talking marriage, a family and a future together. I love her to death and I'm so lucky to have her. I met her when I was least expecting to meet anyone. I wasn't looking to date and wasn't actively trying to meet anyone at all. Then, out of the blue, I met the woman of my dreams. It has been pretty much perfect ever since and I can't wait for us to start our lives together.

Here's to a much better 2014.

 

[mooooose]

i dated my ex for five years... it ended pretty badly, she moved on quickly and i didnt even try to move on for 6 months. we talked after the break up, a few times in the following months, and a few times this past summer (a year after the breakup). then she started ignoring me.

me and my ex ended so badly that i tried to reach out but she said to never contact her again. i had her blocked on facebook but i unblocked her, and she blocked me.

im not reaching out for romantic reasons, but because i harbor a lot of guilt. i was emotionally abusive in some ways and her family were very cruel to me after the breakup (though i realize it wasnt all my fault anymore, but she was a pretty horrible communicator and lacked mental stability, and it made it difficult for me to know what i was saying was hurting her, she was very sensitive) and she blamed me for a lot. i bark up that tree to hopefully be resolved of some guilt. ive apologized countless times via text and she has accepted sometimes and said she forgives me, but very much in passing.

i shouldnt care but i do. she was horrible for me, but our relationship was important and my lack of closure destroys me.

why would she ignore me?

 

[gimz]

why would she ignore me?

maybe she feels as much pain as you do, but she had to do it because she knew it would be better for you guys.

For her and your own sake, give each other a break and space

 

[mooooose]

oh nah i understand why in the past, but it was ME doing no contact, she wanted to be friends and had a bf and was doing ok

i was miserable, but i got over her and ive been fine

im currently dating a girl who is AMAZING but she put something in my head regarding exes and i wanted to just find some closure with my ex and i wasnt able to do it, despite her assurances that one day we could be friends, she just deaded me

i dont get it

i just want to be absolved of the guilt i felt for over a year and know that our relationship isnt something she looks back on badly

 

[Visceir]

why would she ignore me?

As you said, she has moved on. Probably has someone or something else on her mind and discussing or bringing up past things wouldn't probably be the most fun thing -- sounds like you've done that over and over already anyway.

I don't think she really owes you anything at this point, especially because of the "i was emotionally abusive" part.

Time to forget her and figure out your issues on your own.

 

[potam]

Thoughts on this situation, GAF?

Quick rundown: met a girl at a party, talked to her a little bit but not too much. She adds me on FB, comments on/likes a picture, I send her a message and we chat for ~20 min before I go to sleep.

On her profile, she has a few metal bands listed. My friend just asked me to go to some shitty show with him tomorrow (I'm no fan of metal, but whatever it may be fun). So the question is: do I go all in and just ask her if she'd want to go with us, or hold and hope that something else comes up more organically in the future?

And I know some people think that the whole "leagues" thing is dumb, but for reference, I'm like a minor league bat boy, and she seems like she's a hall of fame guarantee.

 

[Idde]

Thoughts on this situation, GAF?

Quick rundown: met a girl at a party, talked to her a little bit but not too much. She adds me on FB, comments on/likes a picture, I send her a message and we chat for ~20 min before I go to sleep.

On her profile, she has a few metal bands listed. My friend just asked me to go to some shitty show with him tomorrow (I'm no fan of metal, but whatever it may be fun). So the question is: do I go all in and just ask her if she'd want to go with us, or hold and hope that something else comes up more organically in the future?

And I know some people think that the whole "leagues" thing is dumb, but for reference, I'm like a minor league bat boy, and she seems like she's a hall of fame guarantee.

This sounds pretty ideal and organic. Go for it (if you friend doesn't mind)

 

[potam]

This sounds pretty ideal and organic. Go for it (if you friend doesn't mind)

Yeah, I'm leaning towards just asking her...I'd just prefer to talk more beforehand to actually gauge her interest. I know the signs are pointing the right way...but girls.

 

[AdventureRacing]

There is this new nurse at work who is pretty into me. She's south korean and is the typical 30 year old who looks like she's 20. Very attractive and smart and normally the type of girl i would be all over. Shame i'm already in a relationship lol. It's times like this i miss the single life but it's easy just remembering the good things.

She wanted me to try some of her cooking tonight (yeah she's a good cook as well). We're both staying in the nurses quarters together (her full time me a few days a week working out of town). I was heading home today for days off so i didn't stick around but i wouldn't have minded trying it out lol.

 

[giga]

There is this new nurse at work who is pretty into me. She's south korean and is the typical 30 year old who looks like she's 20. Very attractive and smart and normally the type of girl i would be all over. Shame i'm already in a relationship lol. It's times like this i miss the single life but it's easy just remembering the good things.

She wanted me to try some of her cooking tonight (yeah she's a good cook as well). We're both staying in the nurses quarters together (her full time me a few days a week working out of town). I was heading home today for days off so i didn't stick around but i wouldn't have minded trying it out lol.

Smh

 

[potam]

No idea what is going on in my life, but I got the balls to ask her so I think we're going to see that show tomorrow night.

 

[PflargBlarg]

...
Anyway, I was going to give her the pickles, pick her up, drive her to the restaurant. You know, a proper date! She works close to the restaurant and told me to just meet her there after I had already left and was headed to her apt. I was a little bummed with that. Dinner went really well, she was tired. I was super tired but the company was great. Talked about our families and holiday plans and hinted at more to come... Decided to call it an early night. She really liked me buying her pickles . The date night I proposed ended up lasting about an hour which sucked.

Got home, thought to myself man, just go to bed. Cant wait to see her again and she DOES like you. Then I texted her that I had a good time as usual... no response... get online look at OKC see her online. Get mad, text her that "she is a bad lier and good luck with online dating". She said what is up with that, she was in the shower...

I text her:
My head is messed up, I just can't tell with you.
Felt like I wasted my time going on other dates while she was making up her mind because I was thinking about someone else.
Asked her just how slow do you want to go?
etc
etc
etc
She defines what I am doing as a rant even though at the time I was numb and "felt calm". It was a rant!

She msgs first thing in the morning saying not to contact her again and that she is done. I didn't get any sleep that night either.

She disabled her OKC and POF accounts and I was #1 contender and I completely fucked up. All I had to do was just take things slow, she absolutely needed that because of her past and with how things started between us. She told me that she hadn't gone on any dates in a couple of weeks the night she wanted to see me when I told her that I went on some dates.

That was 4 weeks a go tonight. Still think about her a lot...

Sweet jesus man. That is the most incredible self sabotage. You have some issues you need to deal with if you were actually able to hit 'send' on THAT text.

 

[Omegasquash]

No idea what is going on in my life, but I got the balls to ask her so I think we're going to see that show tomorrow night.

The first step is the hardest. After that, your feet just tend to fall into place once you've got a little momentum.

Of course I hope that you get everything you want and more out of it, but if it doesn't work, just don't be afraid to look to those balls again to get the courage up. Before you know it, you'll be having fun.

 

[potam]

The first step is the hardest. After that, your feet just tend to fall into place once you've got a little momentum.

Of course I hope that you get everything you want and more out of it, but if it doesn't work, just don't be afraid to look to those balls again to get the courage up. Before you know it, you'll be having fun.

Not really sure what's goin' on, to be honest. I think the biggest thing was having my marriage fall apart again when trying to patch it up (there's a thread about it if you care), and realizing that while I may not be completely over my wife, but I don't love her anymore and I'm not hung up on her.

In my entire life, I don't think I've ever directly asked a girl out. I basically forced myself to do it at the park last week, got turned down (she said she had a bf, so it wasn't like she laughed in my face)...and I realized rejection really wasn't that bad. Somehow that rejection boosted my self esteem.

But yeah, I'm pretty sure I'll be enjoying the bachelor life. And I'm sure everyone who told me this over the past couple of months when I was a mopey bitch are laughing their asses off.

 

[freshair]

My short recap:

Don't get involved with someone who just got out of a 7 year relationship (like a month after), who agrees to be exclusive with you, but is weird/apprehensive about labels. They are unsure of themselves after being in something committed for so long and resort to some shady as fuck behavior.

 

[Oxn]

Sweet jesus man. That is the most incredible self sabotage. You have some issues you need to deal with if you were actually able to hit 'send' on THAT text.

Lol i was thinking the same thing

Was hard to read

Was thinking is this a script to a rom com?

 

[Omegasquash]

Not really sure what's goin' on, to be honest. I think the biggest thing was having my marriage fall apart again when trying to patch it up (there's a thread about it if you care), and realizing that while I may not be completely over my wife, but I don't love her anymore and I'm not hung up on her.

In my entire life, I don't think I've ever directly asked a girl out. I basically forced myself to do it at the park last week, got turned down (she said she had a bf, so it wasn't like she laughed in my face)...and I realized rejection really wasn't that bad. Somehow that rejection boosted my self esteem.

But yeah, I'm pretty sure I'll be enjoying the bachelor life. And I'm sure everyone who told me this over the past couple of months when I was a mopey bitch are laughing their asses off.

Oh, I read it. That's why I said what I said. And asking a girl out takes nards, man. That you're in here saying that the rejection boosted your self esteem is HUGE.

 

[maxxpower]

Thought I'd post an update since you guys always tried to help me and gave me great advice.

So I have a girlfriend now, and I lost my virginity to her. I liker her a lot and sex with her has been an awesome experience. I'll always have bad days when I feel like shit about my body image but it's something that I've realized everyone goes through. My life is pretty much the same as it was before I had a girlfriend, as I wasn't looking to have a girlfriend to give meaning to my life. Being in a relationship with my girlfriend is a great new experience that I'm enjoying very much and I would like to thank all of you because you never lost hope in me and supported me when I was feeling down.

 

[Omegasquash]

Thought I'd post an update since you guys always tried to help me and gave me great advice.

So I have a girlfriend now, and I lost my virginity to her. I liker her a lot and sex with her has been an awesome experience. I'll always have bad days when I feel like shit about my body image but it's something that I've realized everyone goes through. My life is pretty much the same as it was before I had a girlfriend, as I wasn't looking to have a girlfriend to give meaning to my life. Being in a relationship with my girlfriend is a great new experience that I'm enjoying very much and I would like to thank all of you because you never lost hope in me and supported me when I was feeling down.

To the bolded, why yes, yes it is. And don't sweat the bad days. I have them too. Hell, my wife and I had LOTS of them, and lots of THOSE we had together. We still do, even after losing shitloads of weight and adding exercise and time together. Hell man...we have more sex now than we did when we first got together, and we've got two kids. We also happen to be in better shape than ever, but I digress...

Point is, it's fantastic that you're realizing that everyone goes through that shit. It minimizes it, and from there gives perspective on how little thoughts like that matter. You'll have a ball (pun intended) going forward as long as you don't let negative thoughts get the best of you. Sure, they'll get you down, but they won't get you out.

 

[TylerD]

Sweet jesus man. That is the most incredible self sabotage. You have some issues you need to deal with if you were actually able to hit 'send' on THAT text.

Lol i was thinking the same thing

Was hard to read

Was thinking is this a script to a rom com?

OK, so there was a back and forth between those. But if you are just talking about the "good luck with online dating" one... Yeah.

Again, I was absolutely exhausted and seeing her on OKC didn't bother me before. My judgement got all screwed up in my delirium. Trust me, I am still kicking myself over it. Biggest bonehead move on my part that I can remember.

I was literally sick to my stomach after reading that stuff in the morning.

edit: That is why in my mind, I had to send her something saying I'm sorry for that.

 

[Lafiel]

Recap for 2013? despite the fact I haven't got a GF yet I'm pretty damn confident I will eventually with all the progress I've made on "myself" compared to last year.

Essentially I've made a ton of friends, developed my personality into one where I feel incredibly confident about myself and able to communicate openly with anyone. Gotten myself involved in political activism, studying a degree in a field that I'm really passionate about (education) always have constant social events and stuff to do besides my usual hobbies (film and video games).

Plans for next year? just experience life in all it's awe-inspiring glory.. while probably working on my organizational skills to have a better study-work-social balance, taking up some singing, dancing or acting lessons for some fun as well as getting a drivers license (because it's very limiting not having one where I live here).

 

[Leeness]

Thought I'd post an update since you guys always tried to help me and gave me great advice.

So I have a girlfriend now, and I lost my virginity to her. I liker her a lot and sex with her has been an awesome experience. I'll always have bad days when I feel like shit about my body image but it's something that I've realized everyone goes through. My life is pretty much the same as it was before I had a girlfriend, as I wasn't looking to have a girlfriend to give meaning to my life. Being in a relationship with my girlfriend is a great new experience that I'm enjoying very much and I would like to thank all of you because you never lost hope in me and supported me when I was feeling down.

Congrats! How long have you been seeing her?

 

[maxxpower]

Congrats! How long have you been seeing her?

Thanks!
Almost two months.

 

[Leeness]

Thanks!
Almost two months.

Great!

Glad you found someone. I know you've had a lot of angst about it.

 

[Valus]

Sweet jesus man. That is the most incredible self sabotage. You have some issues you need to deal with if you were actually able to hit 'send' on THAT text.

Are you saying you've never done something stupid when you were emotionally pissed off? Come on.

He doesn't have any issues that needs dealing with - he's completely aware of how he messed up and owned up to it unlike so many other people around here that blame the other side.

Tyler - you don fucked up, it's true. Try not to beat yourself up too much though man. You've acknowledged your mistake and unfortunately since we cannot revise time and change it, the only thing we can do is accept how things are today and move on. You're a great guy, once you get over this hump don't hesitate to jump back in. The door won't open unless you're knocking.

 

[TylerD]

Are you saying you've never done something stupid when you were emotionally pissed off? Come on.

He doesn't have any issues that needs dealing with - he's completely aware of how he messed up and owned up to it unlike so many other people around here that blame the other side.

Tyler - you don fucked up, it's true. Try not to beat yourself up too much though man. You've acknowledged your mistake and unfortunately since we cannot revise time and change it, the only thing we can do is accept how things are today and move on. You're a great guy, once you get over this hump don't hesitate to jump back in. The door won't open unless you're knocking.

Thank you, I really appreciate that.

Honestly, I am very happy that she put her foot down like she did and hope that means she won't put up with crap from any guys in the future. She doesn't disserve that.

 

[Pau]

Thought I'd post an update since you guys always tried to help me and gave me great advice.

So I have a girlfriend now, and I lost my virginity to her. I liker her a lot and sex with her has been an awesome experience. I'll always have bad days when I feel like shit about my body image but it's something that I've realized everyone goes through. My life is pretty much the same as it was before I had a girlfriend, as I wasn't looking to have a girlfriend to give meaning to my life. Being in a relationship with my girlfriend is a great new experience that I'm enjoying very much and I would like to thank all of you because you never lost hope in me and supported me when I was feeling down.

Really happy for you! Like you said, there's gonna be those bad days, but I think they're quite worth it. Was the therapy a lot of help?

 

[maxxpower]

Really happy for you! Like you said, there's gonna be those bad days, but I think they're quite worth it. Was the therapy a lot of help?

Thanks!

Therapy helped a lot, and I think I finally got to the root of why I'm so down on myself and I'm steadily working towards improving myself.

 

[stn]

Gooooooooooooooood shit, Max! Really happy for you. We always told you all these things, it was just up to you to realize them. And you did. Now, help us convince the rest of dating-age that things are possible.

 

[The Artful Dodger]

I fall into that Big Brother role too easily. Sometimes it's a pain in the ass when ladies with troubles like me, cause I tend to just do the whole Protective thing and all that.


I'm not saying I have a hero complex but when I see a girl in trouble, and she seeks my advice/help, it's just rough to see her in any other way when I get that mindset. I feel bad, but like...idk, I just end up feeling bad if she ends up liking me and I'm like, nah, sorry i'm just a nice guy.

 

[Kopite]

Feels odd to give a 2013 recap considering how little I post here, but I've gone from laughing at the existence of such a thread to having read nearly every post since mid October. So here goes:

Well I started my CS degree in September and fell hard for a girl in my class who was also my first crush. We became close friends pretty quickly but when I tried to take it up a notch it exploded spectacularly as half of GAF probably knows by now.

I've not been fantastically well since then but several things have been going my way. I'm pretty sure I aced my exams(after years of poor results in my studies) and I'm getting my first car real soon too.

I've tried to improve myself in the meantime by taking a couple of lessons for different stuff, I'm proudest of my Mandarin prowess since then, I've been able to.engage in some basic convos and I'm gonna keep at it until I become really fluent at it. The most important thing I've done though is expanding my social circle. Before I never missed a single lunch or study session with my crush and then really limited the number of ppl I met. Since then I've gone out with a whole lot more people and made a lot more friends.

As for me and 'that' girl, oddly enough we're even closer now. She often initiates contact and we chat fru hours. Its gotten to a point where I'm wondering if it's healthy to communicate this much so soon even though I'm about 90% over it and I've joked with her about it. I think I'll be able to maintain a strictly platonic relationship with her though.

I haven't asked another girl out since, but I'm pretty happy with some of the improvements I've made to myself and I'm enjoying my vacation now. I look forward to when my next sem starts and I join a class with a lot of girls who I've not met

Anyway that ended up being a lot more then I initially intended to write. I've enjoyed reading all your posts, here's to a great 2014!

 

[Mr.Fresh]

I guess it's time to start posting in here. So I've known this amazing girl for a few months now and I have been asking her out since I met her but she kept turning me down. But last night she finally agreed to go out with me. She said she wanted to focus on school before but now that the semesters over she has time for us to get to know each other more. We decided that we are going out Friday so I hope all goes well.

 

[clav]

Anyone in here use coffee meets bagel?

https://coffeemeetsbagel.com/

 

[Kung Fu Jedi]

I guess it's time to start posting in here. So I've known this amazing girl for a few months now and I have been asking her out since I met her but she kept turning me down. But last night she finally agreed to go out with me. She said she wanted to focus on school before but now that the semesters over she has time for us to get to know each other more. We decided that we are going out Friday so I hope all goes well.

Congrats man! I hope it goes well and keep us updated.

 

[Minamu]

LOL don't be this guy online xD I know that's you stn!

Not-so-passive aggressive OKC message

 

[GutsOfThor]

Do you seize up like this when you're asking a guy friend to do something with you?
Treat it the same way at first. Keep it very casual and say "It was nice running into you the other week. I'm gonna go grab a coffee/beer/see a movie", want to join me?"

Two weeks isn't too long either. So go throw out that offer. Preferably something you are going to do even without her.

Hell, just last week I did the same thing. There's this girl that seems interested in me but gives out very confusing signals (long story). I was already going to go out for a beer so I asked if she wanted to join. She had an excuse and couldn't make it, but I went anyway. While I was there I ran into a co-worker and chilled with her instead.

Thanks for the advice! Unfortunately I found that she is 24 and that's a little too young for me so I'm going to just drop it. I will definitely use the advice I got from here for any future endeavors that I may have.

 

[hydragonwarrior]

Alright GAF, what is your opinion of the following situation:

1. I'm a guy who eats out a LOT. And one of the places I frequent is a fairly popular place with a good priced hot table (6.99 for a lunch? Hell yes)

2. There's a girl who is not on my radar at all but I see her working there every now and then. She's cute, skinny... not my type (more into busty) but I talk to her every now and then.

3. So tonight, I decide to go out and just grab a rum and coke at my local bar/club. Just so happens that SHE is there.

4. So we recognize each other, but i'm not tipsy enough to hit on her. Instead we do the friendly banter and crap, but I do it intentionally because... well, I didn't want to "shit where I eat".

5. Of course, it also wasn't a busy night, i'm tipsy, and the girls there are minimal. AND I see her get drunk enough to make out with another guy... even though I intentionally made the decision not to go further with her, I now feel I should've.

Or at least, my dick does.

What say you GAF? Did I dodge a bullet so I can continue to enjoy a non-awkward venture to my favourite restaurant that I go to almost daily? Or did I go wrong by ignoring my other head?

 

[isual]

2013 recap.

Finally got my bachelors in policy sci.
Met a lot of cool people.
Busted a nut on a regular basis.
Bought a vita, 3dsxl, nexus 7, ps4, wiiu, tons of games.
Have a new best friend.

Not a bad year.

God bless everyone for 2014

 

[PapaJustify]

LOL don't be this guy online xD I know that's you stn!

Not-so-passive aggressive OKC message

Haha oh wow.

It's sad and funny at the same time as I have been in a similar situation just the last week:
Had this girl's profile found a while a go. It popped up every now and then in my OKC feed. And it was nice, because she writes she is a gamer and she looks quite nice. So lately I have been saying "Fuck it" and started sending her a message. And to my surprise she even responded and was quite nice.
So this kept going during the last week and I tried to get this conversation going with her being more responding rather than being mutually interested asking me about stuff. So I guess I kinda never was her type. Her responses got shorter and shorter in the process and lately were so short, that I kinda felt that there was probably not much going on with the two of us.
However two days ago I changed my profile pictures to more recent ones, because the one I had was quite old, before sending my message to her. I kinda started a new topic asking her about her christmas plans (very casual, but also a slight bit personal I guess) and told her about my plans. I saw her checking out my profile afterwards but she has not responded to me ever since even though she has been online several times. And that kinda hits the wrong places because even though I doesn't have to be connected it feels like she checked out my new pictures and was immediately turned off (bummer xD ).
But yeah long story short: This guy in the video went out of control too quickly, but I can tell you that a lot of rational and irrational sh*t is running through your head, when you are not getting responses. lol

 

[Minamu]

Yeah for sure, I've had those feelings too, and still do for time to time. You're not supposed to take it personally, but sometimes it's hard not to. But acting on it is rarely a good idea

Edit: What a perfect 24 hours xD Seems like I got a massive karma ass kicking right in the face today. Last night when I was out, I ran into the first girl from my yearly recap and she was out with her best friend whom I've slept at/with once. So it was kind of awkward since this isn't known by everyone. By the end I go home with the friend again but it doesn't feel right to her, for obvious reasons, which kinda brings me down too and I have to convince her to even let me in, which shouldn't be needed. But we eventually sleep and fool around a bit but not all the way, and close to nothing at all this morning. Kind of a let down since it's the last night in town until new year's eve for me so my mood wasn't the best. I decided to call it quits with the girl I had been with before just to sort the mess out. She's okay with it, she denies having stronger feelings for me, which has been the worry all along. But she also asks me not to hit on her (very hot) little sister nor her best friend. Oops. So that certainly put a dent in my day. Her friend is still interested though but her own indecisiveness is kinda off putting.

Then I try talking to one of the club staff members I've been friends with for a while and been interested in. She's been angry or something with me for about a week and I have no idea what I've done. I tried talking to her last night but she almost literally ran away from me. So I ask her today what's wrong and she deletes me from facebook. She of course denies my new friend request and the only response to my new question about what I've done is to block me entirely. I think it's gonna be hard to get a job at that club now Don't shit where you eat I guess.

And soon I'm going on a train trip back home for Xmas and Swedish trains are infamous for being late and breaking down. I expect my train to explode or something with today's luck.

 

[NeOak]

Alright GAF, what is your opinion of the following situation:

1. I'm a guy who eats out a LOT. And one of the places I frequent is a fairly popular place with a good priced hot table (6.99 for a lunch? Hell yes)

2. There's a girl who is not on my radar at all but I see her working there every now and then. She's cute, skinny... not my type (more into busty) but I talk to her every now and then.

3. So tonight, I decide to go out and just grab a rum and coke at my local bar/club. Just so happens that SHE is there.

4. So we recognize each other, but i'm not tipsy enough to hit on her. Instead we do the friendly banter and crap, but I do it intentionally because... well, I didn't want to "shit where I eat".

5. Of course, it also wasn't a busy night, i'm tipsy, and the girls there are minimal. AND I see her get drunk enough to make out with another guy... even though I intentionally made the decision not to go further with her, I now feel I should've.

Or at least, my dick does.

What say you GAF? Did I dodge a bullet so I can continue to enjoy a non-awkward venture to my favourite restaurant that I go to almost daily? Or did I go wrong by ignoring my other head?

If she felt rejected by you, you're dead.

Minamu, the bar girl wanted the D. Yours. You know it.

 

[Minamu]

If she felt rejected by you, you're dead.

Minamu, the bar girl wanted the D. Yours. You know it.

Yeah that was the intent at least xD I don't know what happened, I've calmed down and don't care anymore. I'll be gone until nye so I probably won't be out there for 2-3 weeks Whatevs. Only truly annoying thing is that she might fuck up my chances for a job there. It wouldn't surprise me unfortunately.

 

[stn]

Not too much happened on my end this year. Met some girls online, was quite smitten with one of them. Nothing came of it, was down for a while and let myself go. Decided I was being too negative and weak, ended up joining the gym as motivation. Working now to get my positive energy back up.

What should I do for the future? Care less. I've been good at it but once in a while my armor slightly cracks.

 

[Manarola]

Meh, I re-enabled online dating account last week and haven't gotten anywhere with it. I was getting tons of dates in the summer so I'm not sure what's changed. I'mma nuke this shit and chalk it up to the holiday season

 

[twilitesparklemotion]

Meh, I re-enabled online dating account last week and haven't gotten anywhere with it. I was getting tons of dates in the summer so I'm not sure what's changed. I'mma nuke this shit and chalk it up to the holiday season

I usually write off OKC, but I had two successes with it this fall, including one very promising girl that I went out with the day before I flew home for Christmas.

 

[Samara]

Meh, I re-enabled online dating account last week and haven't gotten anywhere with it. I was getting tons of dates in the summer so I'm not sure what's changed. I'mma nuke this shit and chalk it up to the holiday season

I'm sure the holidays will be a great time to meet new people. At least I hope so, I haven't gone out in quite a while with the finals and work.

 

[NeOak]

Yeah that was the intent at least xD I don't know what happened, I've calmed down and don't care anymore. I'll be gone until nye so I probably won't be out there for 2-3 weeks Whatevs. Only truly annoying thing is that she might fuck up my chances for a job there. It wouldn't surprise me unfortunately.

Just act cool. If she starts spewing BS about you, remember to not lift a finger.

As for the job, who knows. See when you return.