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[DECK'ARD]

http://www.channel5.com/shows/celebrity-big-brother

Returning to the UK's prestigious Channel 5 tonight is the nation's favourite guilty-pleasure!

Following the last one where people were kicked out left, right and centre for racism and sexual assault while Perez Hilton had a mental breakdown, Channel 5 have upped the stakes by declaring all-out war between our nations and selected nothing but the best to represent us.

-

(Leaked line-up, barring any last minute changes/realising what a huge mistake they are making)


Team UK

Chris Ellison

Played a copper in The Bill

Natasha Hamilton

Member of girl group Atomic Kitten

Sherrie Hewson

Yet another one from the talk-show Loose Women

James Hill

The really stupid one from last year's Apprentice

Stevi Ritchie and Chloe Jasmine

The joke act and fake posh-bird from last year's X-Factor

Gail Porter

Former kid's TV presenter famous for going bald and then being a sex-addict

Bobby Davro

Washed-up comedian who no one ever found funny


Team USA

Austin Armacost

Reality star

Fat Man Scoop

Hip-hop artist

Farrah Abraham

Teen Mom star

Daniel Baldwin

Actor and drug-addict

Jenna Jameson

Porn star

Janice Dickinson

Model and TV personality

Tila Tequila

TV personality and fan of Hitler

-

http://bigbrother.channel5.com/live-stream

Live launch tonight at 9PM on 5, and as an extra-bonus this series there is live-feed every night from midnight on 5*, where they will be fed alcohol for our entertainment.

Who cracks first? You decide!

 

[inki]

How can I watch this in the US ? Youtube?

 

[DECK'ARD]

How can I watch this in the US ? Youtube?

Yeah, it's usually uploaded to YouTube pretty quick.

 

[StrikerD]

Fucking Bobby Davro, christ.

 

[schlongdog]

Oh god

 

[infi]

Fucking Bobby Davro, christ.

Surely it's a crime to lock someone in a house with him

 

[Nothus]

I just had to google who James Hill was. He was a complete tit on The Apprentice so should be perfect for this.

 

[Daffy Duck]

Oh lord save us.

 

[madp0k]

my missus loves this

I may just watch for Jenna

Spoiler

if you wish to change watch for wank that will also work

 

[DECK'ARD]

I heard Tila Tequila described as "David Icke with tits", is this true US-GAF?

I hope so.

 

[Matt_]

As a brit just going by the names I recognise 6 of team USA and none of the UK ones
Does this make me a traitor?

 

[The_Hitcher89]

Wasn't Janice Dickinson on I'm A Celebrity at some point?

This is going to be horrendous.

 

[DECK'ARD]

As a brit just going by the names I recognise 6 of team USA and none of the UK ones
Does this make me a traitor?

Team UK is really bottom of the barrel stuff, but then anyone with any sense would run a mile here.

 

[toweringinferno]

As a brit just going by the names I recognise 6 of team USA and none of the UK ones
Does this make me a traitor?

No brother you aren't the only one, although i only recognised 5 from USA

 

[The_Hitcher89]

I recognise Gail Porter, Natasha Hamilton and Bobby Davro

Bobby Davro will obviously be one of those who tries being upbeat at the start, but within hours turns out to be a dour twat who only smiles when he remembers he's on camera.

 

[kulapik]

I only know Tila Tequila.

 

[robotzombie]

my missus loves this

I may just watch for Jenna

Spoiler

if you wish to change watch for wank that will also work

are you under the assumption that they filmed this in the 90s?

 

[Jill Sandwich]

I only know 2 UK ones and 4 US ones. I clearly don't read Heat or watch terrestrial TV much!

 

[Velcro Fly]

I feel like Team USA has sent their worst to this competition.

 

[Jill Sandwich]

are you under the assumption that they filmed this in the 90s?

Aye she's let herself go a bit. I wouldn't get too excited.

 

[Daffy Duck]

^ WAT ON EARTH IS THAT? IT'S NOT JENNA J IS IT?

 

[FloydtheFathead]

Wow, did they get anyone with a pulse?

Tila Tequila? I haven't seen that name in like 7 years.

 

[StrikerD]

Wow, did they get anyone with a pulse?

Tila Tequila? I haven't seen that name in like 7 years.

Id say even without a pulse she will probably still sleep with them

 

[Red Liquorice]

That is one of the saddest "celebrity" line-ups I've ever seen, even for Channel 5.

 

[Nothus]

Crossing my fingers for another Leo Sayer-esque meltdown. Don't care who by.

 

[funkypie]

the UK ones seem like nobodies but the US celebs are heavy hitters and I mean that as in biggish names that you could find on reality TV.

also lol @ tila tequila being a fan of hitler.

 

[FloydtheFathead]

Id say even without a pulse she will probably still sleep with them

Probably. Jesus throw in gallons of alcohol and watch the madness happen.

 

[FloydtheFathead]

I love that Baldwin's description is just actor and drug-addict. :jnc

 

[Big Blue]

Eh, Celebrity BB isn't as good as the ones with randoms in my opinion.

 

[DECK'ARD]

Crossing my fingers for another Leo Sayer-esque meltdown. Don't care who by.

I think Bobby Davro is a likely candidate for that.

 

[DECK'ARD]

Right, let's get this impending car-crash on the road.

 

[Volcane]

They are scraping the bottom of the celebrity barrel there.

 

[Matt_]

 

[perfectchaos007]

Tila goes both ways. Should make for an exciting house.

 

[DECK'ARD]

"I can't find any ice-cubes in England"

It's insights like this that make the show.

 

[Wax Free Vanilla]

lol, Stevi Ritchie to win.

 

[Newlove]

They are scraping the bottom of the celebrity barrel there.

Lol as always but it does seem particularly apparent this year.

 

[DECK'ARD]

Hah, the winning team gets to fly their flag over the house. It's gloriously tacky this.

Round 1, fight!

 

[Nothus]

Where the fuck is Bobby?!

 

[DECK'ARD]

Where the fuck is Bobby?!

Oh yeah!

 

[Thewonandonly]

3 porn stars on team USA
NICE!!!!!!

 

[Galang]

A mess at who they chose for the US side. They really couldn't find more interesting celebrities could they. I'll be rooting for Tila. I enjoyed her messy MTV show when I was like 10 at the least

 

[DECK'ARD]

UK WINS

 

[operon]

Us has better names most of the uk are washed up like their careers

 

[Nothus]

LOL There he is!

 

[Mattlikewhoa]

Holy crap this sounds like quite the train wreck in the making...

Spoiler

so how do I watch from Canada?!

 

[valkillmore]

Holy crap this sounds like quite the train wreck in the making...

Spoiler

so how do I watch from Canada?!

Don't spoiler tag that shit son! My wife and I also want to know how to enjoy this trainwreck from North Fucking Yankton!

 

[operon]

Stevi Ritchie and Chloe Jasmine are real train wreck stuff, that vt stevi proof that gaf virgins could get laid as well

 

[Chopper]

I can't believe Jenna Jameson is in this...

 

[DECK'ARD]

Holy crap this sounds like quite the train wreck in the making...

Spoiler

so how do I watch from Canada?!

Don't spoiler tag that shit son! My wife and I also want to know how to enjoy this trainwreck from North Fucking Yankton!

http://bigbrother.channel5.com/live-stream if you have any luck with it.

Episodes usually get uploaded to YouTube pretty quickly as well.