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[Blond]

The Who:

Me, unless otherwise noted and updated, will be collecting and posting confessions on a semi-rolling basis (2-3 batch updates a week). If you'd like to join in feel free to DM me! I figured with how crazy 2020 has been this would be a great time to resurrect this.

The how:

2 options are available

Send secret confessions to neogafconfessional@gmail.com

Anonymous mailer

Send Anonymous Email with the Most Secure Email Service

Send unlimited anonymous emails for free with our secure service. Upgrade to premium for advanced features like attachments and real-time tracking.

anonymousemail.me

This Google Docs form

Click here to submit confession


The When:
Beginning Nov 1st till the end of the month, potentially in December as well if things go well.


General Advice:
Send from an anonymous e-mail or one that can't be traced back to your public identity because even if it's nothing illegal you still don't want the text getting back to you.

Rule:
1. Try to keep it as clean as possible from a language standpoint.
2. Don't make stuff up.
3. Don't admit to anything seriously illegal, anonymity only goes so far.
4. None of this "then a couple of guys who were up to no good..." crap.
5. Don't make stuff up.
6. Remember detective GAF: Don't put anything out there that you don't want public.
7. Anything emailed has the consent to be posted.
8. Don't post anything that would make GAF liable.
9. Be nice.
10. Don't make stuff up.
11. If you've been banned, I'm not pleading to the mods on your behalf. Posting that is the quickest way to get this whole shindig shut down.
12. I'm not a games journalist. This isn't a place to send your fake scoops. You can contact Kotaku for that.
13. Please do not send me confessions in .doc or .pdf form. I will not open attachments. Please put your confession in the email text box and send it.
14. Don't make stuff up.

Confessions will run from November 1st to 30th, potentially into December if interest is high enough.

Previous Years

Anonymous Confessions 2015
Anonymous Confessions 2014
Anonymous Confessions 2013
Anonymous Confessions 2012

 

[Mobile Suit Gooch]

Ooh. It's back

 

[Blond]

Ooh. It's back

Got the OK from the mods this morning!

 

[DESTROYA]

I’ve never done a bad thing in my life, sorry I can’t participate.

 

[Blond]

I’ve never done a bad thing in my life, sorry I can’t participate.

Doesn’t have to be “bad”

 

[Deleted member 801069]

remember Taxicab Confessions? that show was great

 

[Ozzy Onya A2Z]

There have been some real gems in these threads over the years. Do your worst...well anonymously confess to your worst anyhow.

 

[TaySan]

I'm afraid i would give away mine too easily. lol

 

[nush]

I'm afraid i would give away mine too easily. lol

It's OK, I'll put on in for "not" you! Nobody will be able to tell the difference.

 

[The Wheel of Fortune]

Ah, this brings back memories! I still remember some of the most wtf ones, like the KKK teacher. Fuck that guy.

 

[nush]

Ah, this brings back memories! I still remember some of the most wtf ones, like the KKK teacher. Fuck that guy.

That's the one I was looking for. I can't believe people fell for that obvious troll, even now. Every single point of that story is note perfect cliche "Black football player" "T" stands for TYRONE the whole thing reads like a 90's anti racism movie script.

 

[ExpandKong]

I am secretly also -Arcadia-

did I do this right

posting so I can get alerts later

 

[Arkam]

2020 HAS STARTED TO BECOme the death kill. Love the discipline but abhor violence


Edit: Damn is alcohol a hell of a drug.

 

[Foamy]

Nice try FBI but I'm not falling for it.

 

[West Texas CEO]

 

[JimiNutz]

These are usually my favourite threads of the year. Let's get it all out.

 

[teezzy]

Huh...

So this is what being triggered feels like.

Weird.

 

[TrainedRage]

Is this cum closet?

 

[and 3 others]

Nice try FBI but I'm not falling for it.

Incoming Fedposting.

 

[slugbahr]

Previous Years

No link to the one by Wings 嫩翼翻せ ??

 

[Kadayi]

No link to the one by Wings 嫩翼翻せ ??

I was going to say the same. There were at least 2 years of Christmas Confessionals IIRC

 

[Cunth]

should have some kind of form. I’m too lazy to email

edit: not that I have anything to confess

 

[GymWolf]

Why anonymous? Be proud of the shit you did in the past, they are just learning experiences.

 

[Cunth]

Why anonymous? Be proud of the shit you did in the past, they are just learning experiences.

Not the shit I’ve done

 

[GymWolf]

Not the shit I’ve done

I defecated in open sea because the toilette in my boat was broken and i was too far from the coast.

Do you think i didn't learned nothing from that experience??

Fishes surely learned to stay away from me when i swim in open sea, that's for sure.

 

[Stiflers Mom]

I defecated in open sea...

I thought that's kinda normal for Italians.
Where is the confession in that?

 

[nush]

Why anonymous? Be proud of the shit you did in the past, they are just learning experiences.

Put my name to it, on the internet?

 

[GymWolf]

I thought that's kinda normal for Italians.
Where is the confession in that?

What gave you this impression?!

 

[Cunth]

someone shits in the ocean. germans:

 

[GymWolf]

someone shits in the ocean. germans:

I don't get the joke...

 

[Cunth]

germans apparently like poop

 

[Stiflers Mom]

someone shits in the ocean. germans:

We only do that in Italia, though.

They say "In rome, do it like the romans", you know?

 

[Slings and Arrows]

They say "In rome, do it like the romans", you know?

Shag a load of boys?

 

[Foamy]

 

[Blond]

No link to the one by Wings 嫩翼翻せ ??

I didn’t see it

 

[Falcs]

Someone set up a Google form last time.
Blond , can we set something like that up?
I think that's better than an email. Saves having to find a random emailer.

 

[Blond]

Someone set up a Google form last time.
Blond , can we set something like that up?
I think that's better than an email. Saves having to find a random emailer.

I could do that, I’ll do it when I get a chance sometime today.

 

[OmegaSupreme]

Give me these juicy confessions.

 

[ExpandKong]

Someone set up a Google form last time.
Blond , can we set something like that up?
I think that's better than an email. Saves having to find a random emailer.

I found an anonymous mailer here if Blond wants to add it to the op:

Send Anonymous Email with the Most Secure Email Service

Send unlimited anonymous emails for free with our secure service. Upgrade to premium for advanced features like attachments and real-time tracking.

anonymousemail.me

 

[slugbahr]

I was going to say the same. There were at least 2 years of Christmas Confessionals IIRC

Btw, thanks for the gold bro!

 

[JimiNutz]

I thought that's kinda normal for Italians.
Where is the confession in that?

Funnily enough I was recently in Italy for a funeral.

Decided to have a day at the beach during my stay as the weather was still good. Anyway a few hours in and suddenly I had one of those moments where you suddenly need a shit. You can tell it's pure liquid and there's absolutely no way you can hold it.

I waded out into the sea past a small formation of rocks, pulled my shorts down and sent that hot brown lava out to see. It was pretty liberating and I didn't feel bad at all as there wasn't anyone swimming near by.

When I got back to shore I did think about how many other people had done the same over the years but the sea is so large that a few turds here and there do it no harm.

 

[Stiflers Mom]

Funnily enough I was recently in Italy for a funeral.

Decided to have a day at the beach during my stay as the weather was still good. Anyway a few hours in and suddenly I had one of those moments where you suddenly need a shit. You can tell it's pure liquid and there's absolutely no way you can hold it.

I waded out into the sea past a small formation of rocks, pulled my shorts down and sent that hot brown lava out to see. It was pretty liberating and I didn't feel bad at all as there wasn't anyone swimming near by.

When I got back to shore I did think about how many other people had done the same over the years but the sea is so large that a few turds here and there do it no harm.

Quod erat demonstrandum as the romans said back in the day when their empire was still great.

 

[Blond]

Someone set up a Google form last time.
Blond , can we set something like that up?
I think that's better than an email. Saves having to find a random emailer.

I found an anonymous mailer here if Blond wants to add it to the op:

Send Anonymous Email with the Most Secure Email Service

Send unlimited anonymous emails for free with our secure service. Upgrade to premium for advanced features like attachments and real-time tracking.

anonymousemail.me

Added both to the OP

 

[DESTROYA]

Do not worry JimiNutz whales poop up to 200 liters in one bowel movement not even mentioning all the other sea life peeing and pooping everyday.
If you ever went swimming and accidentally swallowed a bit of water you have some type of poo in your mouth.

 

[JimiNutz]

Do not worry JimiNutz whales poop up to 200 liters in one bowel movement not even mentioning all the other sea life peeing and pooping everyday.
If you ever went swimming and accidentally swallowed a bit of water you have some type of poo in your mouth.

Very true, although I imagine Whales are taking their giant dumps a bit further out and not so close to the shore. Plus whales likely haven't been on a pizza, pasta, beer and Italian sausage diet like I'd been on for a few days by that point.

I'm just glad there weren't any little kids plashing around near by and that I at least had the ocean near me. If I'd been caught short like that when I wasn't near a beach then I'd had to have done it San Francisco style and pooped on the pavement.

 

[Stiflers Mom]

Do not worry JimiNutz whales poop up to 200 liters in one bowel movement not even mentioning all the other sea life peeing and pooping everyday.
If you ever went swimming and accidentally swallowed a bit of water you have some type of poo in your mouth.

That's exactly the kind of post I am on neoGAF for.

 

[Blond]

Happy Halloween or something.

Guy wanted to marry his hot Wife's sister instead.

Spoiler

My ex-wife's sister was a stripper. I saw her dance a few times, and my ex-wife didn't know about it. I secretly wanted the sister the whole time, I married the wrong one.

*NSFW* Cucumber Experimentation

Spoiler

Back when I was just a kid and my hormones were raging, I got a bit curious on why gay guys enjoyed stuff shoved into their butts so much. So, I snuck a cucumber out of the fridge and peeled and carved it down to a size that didn't freak me out too much. I used saliva on it and eventually got the courage to haunch down in the shower and give myself a bit o' the business.

I didn't really see what the big deal was, and certainly never felt any prostate pleasure. Just an all consuming sense of regret. After it was done, I didn't know what to do with the cucumber, as my mum was really weird about checking the trash bins for harmful things like needles or broken glass or that sort of thing.

So, I resigned myself to my fate: I washed it off with soap and water in the shower and ATE THE EVIDENCE OF MY SIN. Needless to say, the whole incident cured me of any bi-curiosity I might've had. Never again, lads. Never again.

Come on guys, let's get this thing going!

 

[Elpidio Valdés]

This thread is gonna be a wild ride! The dude ate the fucking cucumber, wtf!!! I got my popcorn ready for more confessions.

 

[nush]

How was the cucumber?

 

[Halo is Back]

I kissed a girl and I liked it