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[-COOLIO-]

"They say if you give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day, but if you teach a man to fish.... then he's gotta get a fishing license, but he doesn't have any money. So he's got to get a job and get into the social security system and pay taxes, and now you're gonna audit the poor cocksucker, cuz' he's not really good with math. So he'll pull the IRS van up to your house, and he'll take all your shit. He'll take your black velvet Elvis and your Batman toothbrush, and your penis pump, and that all goes up for auction with the burden of proof on you because you forgot to carry the one, cuz' you were just worried about eating a fucking fish, and you couldn't even cook the fish cuz' you needed a permit for an open flame. Then the health department is going to start asking you a lot of questions about where are you going to dump the scales and the guts. 'This is not a sanitary environment', and ladies and gentlemen if you get sick of it all at the end of the day... not even legal to kill yourself in this country. Thanks again John Ashcroft you weird bible addict, can't even handle your own drug. You were born free, you got fucked out of half of it, and you wave a flag celebrating it. The only true freedom you find, is when you realize and come to terms with the fact that you are completely and unapologetically fucked, and then you are free to float around the system."

-Doug Stanhope

:lol

 

[SCULLIBUNDO]

And now, farewell to kindness, humanity and gratitude. I have substituted myself for Providence in rewarding the good; may the God of vengeance now yield me His place to punish the wicked.

Edmund Dantes - The Count of Monte Cristo

 

[CaptainCamerica]

The way your Dad looked at it, this watch was your birthright. He'd be damned if any slopes were gonna put their greasy yellow hands on his boy's birthright. So he hid it in the one place he knew he could hide something. His ass. Five long years, he wore this watch up his ass. Then when he died of dysentery, he gave me the watch. I hid this uncomfortable hunk of metal up my ass for two years. Then, after seven years, I was sent home to my family. And now, little man, I give the watch to you.

 

[Mash]

"Isn't it enough to see that a garden is beautiful without having to believe that there are fairies at the bottom of it too?"

Gardens are cool and all but if there were fucking fairies at the bottom, then it'd be instantly a lot more awesome.

"What is terrible is not death but the lives people live or don't live up until their death. They don't honor their own lives, they piss on their lives. They shit them away. Dumb fuckers. They concentrate too much on fucking, movies, money, family, fucking. Their minds are full of cotton. They swallow God without thinking, they swallow country without thinking. Soon they forget how to think, they let others think for them. Their brains are stuffed with cotton. They look ugly, they talk ugly, they walk ugly. Play them the great music of the centuries and they can't hear it. Most people's deaths are a sham. There's nothing left to die." - Bukowski

Not my favourite quote ever but one I like.

 

[KO Traveling Hobo]

my life

IS

fast and furious

Spoiler

some day

.

 

[Feep]

No contest for me.

"Finally, I would like to assure my many Buddhist, Christian, Hindu, Jewish, and Muslim friends that I am sincerely happy that the religion which Chance has given you has contributed to your peace of mind (and often, as Western medical science now reluctantly admits, to your physical well-being).

Perhaps it is better to be un-sane and happy, than sane and un-happy. But it is best of all to be sane and happy.

Whether our descendants can achieve that goal will be the greatest challenge of the future. Indeed, it may well decide whether we have any future."

 

[Hitokage]

It is morally as bad not to care whether a thing is true or not, so long as it makes you feel good, as it is not to care how you got your money as long as you have got it. - Edmund Way Teale

 

[flintstryker]

-Louis L'Amour, The Walking Drum

Up to a point a man's life is shaped by environment, heredity, and the movements and changes in the world around him. Then there comes a time when it lies within his grasp to shape the clay of his life into the sort of thing he wishes to be. Only the weak blame parents, their race, their times, lack of good fortune, or the quirks of fate. Everyone has it within his power to say, 'This I am today; that I will be tomorrow.' The wish, however, must be implemented by deeds."

"Trade is much superior to piracy. You can rob and kill a man but once, but you can cheat him again and again.

A true gentleman is at a disadvantage in dealing with women. Women are realist, and their tactics are realistic, so no man should be a gentleman where women are concerned unless the women are very, very young. Women admire gentlemen, and sleep with cads.

"Lie to a liar, for lies are his coin; steal from a thief, for that is easy; lay a trap for the trickster and catch him at the first attempt, but beware of an honest man."

 

[sedaku]

Talent is overrated.

 

[Mike Works]

"Empty net goals are for homos" - Al Iafrate

 

[Arthrus]

"what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger" it's the best way to live life.

I know a man who hit his head on some rocks diving and is now a quadriplegic. I hope you don't truly believe that.

Spoiler

Also, AIDS!

Anyway, if I had to choose a quote to live by, it would probably be from Ikaruga:
"I will not die until I achieve something.
Even though the ideal is high, I never give in.
Therefore, I never die with regrets."

 

[Gadfly]

I am sure somebody else has already worded this one better:

"It's better to go and regret that you did and stay and regret you didn't."

For the most part I can claim I lived up to that.

This one is not mine:

"Even the obvious geometry axioms are going to be denied by people that do not find them in their interests."

 

[crowphoenix]

"Life goes on."

Simple phrase, so I don't remember where I first heard it.

 

[professor_t]

"What the world needs is more geniuses with humility. There are so few of us left."

 

[satriales]

"I'm forever near a stereo saying, 'What the fuck is this GARBAGE?' And the answer is always the Red Hot Chili Peppers."
-Nick Cave

 

[speedpop]

"For what it's worth it's never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There's no time limit, start whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing.

We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you're proud of. If you find that you're not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again."

 

[lexi]

Hope in reality is the worst of all evils, because it prolongs the torment of man.

Friedrich Nietzsche

 

[AlternativeUlster]

"I'm forever near a stereo saying, 'What the fuck is this GARBAGE?' And the answer is always the Red Hot Chili Peppers."
-Nick Cave

:lol

Here is mine and my life has been forever changed (not to sound retarded or anything) since accidentally stumbling upon it:
And for these words, thus woven into song,
It may be that they are a harmless wile,-
The colouring of the scenes which fleet along,
Which I would seize, in passing, to beguile
My breast, or that of others, for a while
Fame is the thirst of youth, -but I am not
So young as to regard men's frown or smile
As loss or guerdon of a glorious lot ;
I stood and stand alone, -remember'd or forgot
-Lord Byron

 

[professor_t]

"Nietzsche is dead."
- God

Spoiler

Okay, not a favorite, but I chuckled.

Sometimes the good quotes don't need to be profound. Take this, for example:

"You look like I need another drink."

 

[professor_t]

"I'm forever near a stereo saying, 'What the fuck is this GARBAGE?' And the answer is always the Red Hot Chili Peppers."
-Nick Cave

Fantastic.

 

[Karakand]

What's your favorite quote that you yourself said?

"I think you have a drinking problem."
"I don't have a problem with it."

 

[Gadfly]

“There are, it has been said, two types of people in the world. There are those, who when presented with a glass that is exactly half full, say: this glass is half full. And then there are those who say: this glass is half empty. The world however, belongs to those who can look at the glass and say: What’s up with this glass? Excuse me? Excuse me? This is my glass? I don’t think so. My glass was full! And it was a bigger glass! Who’s been pinching my beer?”

Terry Pratchett

 

[Jill Sandwich]

There is never enough time to say or do all the things we would wish. The thing to do is to do as much as you can in the time you have left. Remember, life is short and suddenly you are not there anymore. - The Ghost of Christmas Present.

Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable. - C.S. Lewis

 

[TurboLibre]

"If you expect a kick in the nuts and get a slap in the face, its a victory."

 

[K0NY]

There are some really profound life lessons here, but I believe the topic was not "words to live by" it was "favorite quote."

Anyway, mine was:
"Son, your mother and I are very proud of you."
-my dad (shortly before dying)

 

[ryutaro's mama]

"I will murder you momentarily but first I need cold glass of ice wate-aaarrggghhh."

 

[Deeku]

"In order for the light to shine so brightly, the darkness must be present."

-Francis Bacon, Sr.

 

[Tashi]

"Hey my name is Paul, and this shit's between ya'll"

 

[jeffy_johnson]

Well, since I love Warhammer and Dawn of War, a few of favourites from that are as follows:

I will destroy their minds and burn their bodies
Sanity is for the weak!
Walk softly, and carry a big gun.
I fear no evil, for I am fear incarnate!
I walk again...a god amongst mere mortals.
By my bloody hand the enemy shall not live past this day.

Just a smattering of epic lines from that game.

 

[deadbeef]

I don't have one just off the top of my head, but I could pick dozens from the writings of Marcus Aurelius if I had my book nearby.

 

[Deleted member 30609]

The people that mind don't matter and the people that matter don't mind.

Treat others how you want to be treated.

Simple. Effective.

 

[GCX]

"I'm not crazy but that chair is staring at me."

-J. Karjalainen (finnish songwriter)

 

[kozmo7]

"Be careful about reading healthbooks. You may die of a misprint"
-Mark Twain

 

[spliced]

"Truth does not change because it is, or is not, believed by a majority of the people."

"The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good."

 

[VALIS]

"My McNuggets are an emergency." -- Latreasa Goodman

 

[Rewrite]

I forgot who originally said this, but I always loved this quote:

Cultivate a sense of urgency so that at the close of each day you can repeat: I have not wasted my day!

 

[ltse1]

"Life goes on."

Simple phrase, so I don't remember where I first heard it.

Ob la di, ob la da, brother!

 

[Night_Trekker]

-Louis L'Amour, The Walking Drum

Up to a point a man's life is shaped by environment, heredity, and the movements and changes in the world around him. Then there comes a time when it lies within his grasp to shape the clay of his life into the sort of thing he wishes to be. Only the weak blame parents, their race, their times, lack of good fortune, or the quirks of fate. Everyone has it within his power to say, 'This I am today; that I will be tomorrow.' The wish, however, must be implemented by deeds."

Now that is a nice damn quote.

 

[Tornado Condor]

"Believe" -NeoGAF

 

[ninjarr]

What's your favorite quote that you yourself said?

"I think you have a drinking problem."
"I don't have a problem with it."

In a similar vein:

Roommate: I have this problem, you see: I do a good amount of drugs.
Me: If it's a good amount, what's the problem!?

Favorite quote:

"The difference between adventure and ordeal is attitude."