• Hey Guest. Check out your NeoGAF Wrapped 2025 results here!

Mental Health |OT| Depression & Co.

Status
Not open for further replies.
Zaraki_Kenpachi said:
Jesus Christ, what a disgusting experience. It really bothers me that this is how people are treated. Gee, I can't understand why people don't want to talk to anyone when there's that horrible possibility floating around. The laughing at part I think is what is the worst, you're already on the brink and then you have everything taken away from you so people can make fun of you? Fantastic...
Click to expand...
Yup, the other patients were the one who mainly did the 'laughing'. The nurses were like 'why you crying?' in a snappy kind of way. 'I don't know, like, uh.... fucking duh, dude, I'm depressed! That's why I'm in this filthy shit hole in the first place!'

That's why I really I understand people do need help and if you really do believe you're going to commit suicide, then go to the hospital. BUT, if you can, AVOID it! Once you're in, you cannot get out! I couldn't even barely make phone calls. I had to use their phone and was limited to between something like 9am - 6pm and couldn't talk for maybe more than 5 minutes. It's like being in jail. It depressed me a great deal more than if I were just to stay at home and cry.
 
In other news, "mental health cred" is not a thing.

And I'm not saying that just because I don't have any.
 
Darkmakaimura said:
They'd probably first send you to the hospital in what they call a Legal 2000 for 72 hour observation at a regular hospital and if you're still suicidal, they take you to a mental health facility. Or, maybe in a case like your's where you're speaking with a psychiatrist, you'd go straight to the mental health hospital. I've only ever been in the 72 hour observation at the regular hospital and it was not fun. I heard that being in the mental hospital is even worse. However, if you truly feel like you're going to hurt yourself (or others) at the time you speak with the psychiatrist, you should let them know for your own benefit.

Edit: Going by my experience in Legal 2000, nobody actually gave a shit about you. They only cared that you don't hurt yourself but they don't care if you're depressed. I had people laughing at me, asking me what the big deal was, etc. when I was crying there. You're not allowed to have any possessions - no phone, no magazines.... nothing! You're put in an alcove with just a bed and there's a shitty communal television from around the Regan administration with crappy reception. It sucks bad.
Click to expand...

I'm pretty sure that's an unusual reaction to a patient with suicidal thoughts, no matter if it's psychology or psychiatry. The correct response is usually to try to find out all the ways you've thought about killing yourself, and coming up with a plan to remove access to those ways, potentially by contacting a family member or friend with your permission to help you keep away from methods of enacting those plans, and then going over what to do when you're feeling suicidal, like calling the suicide hotline.

They might ask if you want to go to a hospital, or maybe even suggest it, but if you say you don't want to do that I don't think they'll force you, unless there's a damn good reason to believe you'll probably act on something over the next 72 hours.
 
thepotatoman said:
I'm pretty sure that's an unusual reaction to a patient with suicidal thoughts, no matter if it's psychology or psychiatry. The correct response is usually to try to find out all the ways you've thought about killing yourself, and coming up with a plan to remove access to those ways, potentially by contacting a family member or friend with your permission to help you keep away from methods of enacting those plans, and then going over what to do when you're feeling suicidal, like calling the suicide hotline.

They might ask if you want to go to a hospital, or maybe even suggest it, but if you say you don't want to do that I don't think they'll force you, unless there's a damn good reason to believe you'll probably act on something over the next 72 hours.
Click to expand...
I had called some employee hotline for people feeling depressed and whatnot. I had mentioned that I had thought of jumping out in the street for a car to hit me, but that I wasn't going to do it. They told me that they were going to send someone to talk to me and not to be worried and I told them I didn't want to go to any hospital or anything. Anyways, police showed up and talked with me and I told them I wasn't going to hurt myself. I told them I didn't want to go and that I was already in debt and I didn't need a hospital bill to further in debt. Well, the cops pulled out the "legal 2000" thing and I had to go.

I was escorted to an ambulance where cop cars and a firetruck were also waiting.

After that, I was on my way to Sunrise Hospital.

For the record, they listed me as having "Suicidal Ideation" which is thoughts of suicide. Apparently, you can be hauled off to suicide watch just for even thinking about it.
 
Darkmakaimura said:
Yup, the other patients were the one who mainly did the 'laughing'. The nurses were like 'why you crying?' in a snappy kind of way. 'I don't know, like, uh.... fucking duh, dude, I'm depressed! That's why I'm in this filthy shit hole in the first place!'

That's why I really I understand people do need help and if you really do believe you're going to commit suicide, then go to the hospital. BUT, if you can, AVOID it! Once you're in, you cannot get out! I couldn't even barely make phone calls. I had to use their phone and was limited to between something like 9am - 6pm and couldn't talk for maybe more than 5 minutes. It's like being in jail. It depressed me a great deal more than if I were just to stay at home and cry.
Click to expand...

Sure, but if you're looking into things because you're that far off, do you really think you'll jump at the opportunity? You're already in a bad mind state where you can't think completely straight but even if you could it seems incredibly unappealing. It's just sad when you're at such a low in your life, that's how people handle it.
 
I'm thinking about talking to my doctor about getting back on anti depressants. I was on them for a while a few years ago (tried a couple of different SSRIs, but don't recall which) but I didn't feel they were helping so I stopped. I've gotten to the point where I think I need to do something about my depression other than ignore it and hope it goes away, my thoughts are pretty much entirely negative ranging from "meh" to thinking I should just kill myself now, I have issues with sleep, and I'm just horrible to be around in general.

On top if this, can anyone suggest some sort of CBT I can do, or something I can do myself to get past the cycle of "pointlessness"?
 
Hop said:
In other news, "mental health cred" is not a thing.
Click to expand...

Sorry, bad joke. -__-;;

Everyone was interpreting it as "most experienced in mental illness" than in actual mental health anyway. Could you imagine someone coming in here, bragging about their mental fortitude, excellent coping mechanisms and how incredibly well adjusted they are? =]
 
toadsworth said:
I wish my mind didn't always wander to the most negative possibilities. I am almost certain this it the root of my anxiety
Click to expand...

sorry, dp

I do this as well. I used to be worse for it a few years back. I find having a regular way to get my heart rate up and break a sweat seems to make those anxieties and negative rumination disappear.

If I can't do that at the time or don't feel like it I've found a good spritz of a perfume I like really lifts my mood and tells my rumination/anxiety to take off. Also, a good herbal tea helps too.
 
Does anyone else ever feel intensely guilty about having depression? Like sitting around and people sad is a pathetically narcissistic and selfish thing, given all the people in the world who have problems that far outstrip your own? Even within the sphere of mental illness, I often feel like my depression is a relatively petty issue compared to things like bipolar disorder or schizophrenia. Especially when I haven't adopted any truly destructive behaviors outside of being lazy and hyper aware of my thoughts and feelings.
 
Got my psych appointment in an hour, bricking it D:
 
Anybody have any advice for me?

Younger sister was diagnosed with cancer in 2010 and passed away in 2011. Dad was diagnosed in 2012 and passed away towards the end of last year. Its been a shitty 4 years for my family and my family has completely changed over that time.

I feel like I was doing okay with grieving for my sister up until my Dad was diagnosed, then it felt like I had to change my mindset from dealing with my sister to focusing on the here and now. That was very difficult and I knew it wasn't healthy, but I had no option with having to look out for my dad, I couldn't grieve properly and look after him at the same time. I haven't been able to grieve for either since my dad passed, it just feels like I have been stuck in depression - a depression that wont allow me to access my feelings on the things that have happened. I don't know if my brain is protecting me - from me, but dealing with things in this way, by sweeping them under the rug so to speak, it is chipping away at me slowly. I am depressed, I only get a brief respite from it, usually with preoccupation from material things.

Just wondering if somebody could relate? Losing 2 very close people to me in a row like that has been really tough to take. I feel like I don't have the strength to grieve properly, so I ignore it, but its put me in to pretty much an unmovable depression. It might be possibly that I'm just terrified of grieving for this, that it has been too much for me to take. Could also be that by putting grieving on pause to deal with my dads illness, I've become too good at ignoring it. But I'm paying for it now.

All advice appreciated on this. I'm not scared to hear any advice straight up. Been thinking about posting about this in here for 5 months or so.
 
I want to thank humbugs for that great post.

A quick note that we're seeing some migration back to our IRC chat. It's a great place to get to know people better, to get questions answered, to lift your mood with some silliness, and it's sort of our hub if you want to join the 30-40 of us who talk on twitter, find our tumblrs, blogs, voice chat, etc.

You can join anonymously, but it's better if you register a handle so we can get to know you!

The discussion can be pretty goofy, but you can ALWAYS jump in with "real" questions! Also, you can click people's names to talk privately.




-or-
server: irc.mibbit.com
channel: #depression_gaf
password: depressionsucks
(/nick NEWNAME to change your nick)
 
Just got back, went well actually, got a new treatment starting which he is very optimistic about, if it works no more drugs ever again :D
 
Wow, there are that many people in the IRC chat? That's awesome. I'll have to start popping in. I'm not working at the moment so I don't really interact with that many people on a daily basis and it'd be nice to have some people to talk to who understand a lot of the stuff I'm going through. I've been feeling pretty lonely and isolated, which doesn't really help with depression.

RustyCassette said:
I'm thinking about talking to my doctor about getting back on anti depressants. I was on them for a while a few years ago (tried a couple of different SSRIs, but don't recall which) but I didn't feel they were helping so I stopped. I've gotten to the point where I think I need to do something about my depression other than ignore it and hope it goes away, my thoughts are pretty much entirely negative ranging from "meh" to thinking I should just kill myself now, I have issues with sleep, and I'm just horrible to be around in general.

On top if this, can anyone suggest some sort of CBT I can do, or something I can do myself to get past the cycle of "pointlessness"?
Click to expand...

I empathize. My thoughts are usually pretty negative and it sucks. I also have terribad insomnia and tried various medications for ~10 years without a lot of relief.

The book Feeling Good might work for you. I recommend it with some caveats, though, as I didn't really like how Dr. Burns writes and find him a little annoying in general (particularly since he seems very anti-drug, which is silly because I think they definitely have their uses.) If you can get past that, he has some good suggestions for helping you unlearn some of the negative thinking patterns you've established.
 
I got the grades that I needed for my schedule to work out next quarter, which has been stressing me out for nearly a week now! I needed some good news so this is just perfect.
 
EverythingShiny said:
I empathize. My thoughts are usually pretty negative and it sucks. I also have terribad insomnia and tried various medications for ~10 years without a lot of relief.

The book Feeling Good might work for you. I recommend it with some caveats, though, as I didn't really like how Dr. Burns writes and find him a little annoying in general (particularly since he seems very anti-drug, which is silly because I think they definitely have their uses.) If you can get past that, he has some good suggestions for helping you unlearn some of the negative thinking patterns you've established.
Click to expand...

Thank you for the suggestion. I have downloaded and started reading it.
 
mekes said:
Anybody have any advice for me? All advice appreciated on this. I'm not scared to hear any advice straight up. Been thinking about posting about this in here for 5 months or so.
Click to expand...

Mekes, you are grieving.

I'm of those that doesn't buy The Stages of Grief. How do you put a time scale on a mother who has lost their child?

Or in your case, a brother losing his sister *and* a son losing a father.

All I can say, is that it's okay to feel this way - grief manifests it self in all kinds of ways [ even in absentia]. And that if I were your sister or your father, I wouldn't want you to be sad.

& it's important you tell your self this.

Don't be sad.
 
In the last week, I've smoked four packs of cigarettes, drank a bottle of fireball whiskey, eaten about ten of those shitty Top Ramen packages (raw), gorged myself on several frozen Totino's cheese pizzas, eaten ten cans of olives (I love olives, fuck off) and done some pretty disgusting things with tofu. There was also marijuana at some point but lord, it gets harder to recall the details within the haze.

Everything I do is a desperate attempt to make myself feel *something* other than agony and it just pisses me off because it never works for long. Everything everyone else does and says pisses me off. People are full of fucking shit, promising one thing and then proving that words are hollow. Loyalty means nothing in this day and age.

A year ago, my then-best friend and I were totally stoked because the FFX remaster had been announced. We were going to play it together, over Skype. And then stuff happened, he stopped talking to me because everyone does in the end and I texted him a pic of my copy this morning, which I got today. Nothing. Fuck him. Fucking asshole. FUCKING ASSHOLE. And the worst part is that I can't figure out whether I'm calling him the asshole or myself.

He's just the first of many because in the end, no one will be able to stand knowing me. And why should they? I'm increasingly unable to offer people anything other than toxicity. I am a disaster, my life is over. But that's okay because I have another bottle of blessed fireball right here and that should make everything better, right?

Fuck it all. Nothing matters anymore. I can't.
 
I'm in a lot of pain right now. A little bit over a year ago I became romantically involved with a girl. It was brilliant for a couple of months. Then for some stupid reasons (I had been coming off a relationship with the only person I had ever loved) I got scared and decided to back away. We stopped talking. I broke her heart.

Now that I am ready to get my life back in order, I decided to talk to her after 8 months of silence. We decide to talk as friends again, and she makes it clear she is not interested romantically. We talked on the phone for an hour and I was feeling all giddy again. Then I find out she has been dating someone for a few months, and my heart shatters. Even though I have no right to feel this way, I am just completely crushed.

I've had two relationships in my life and have squandered them both away. I don't know what is wrong with me. On top of that, I've been taking kratom every day for the last few months. I live 30 minutes away from the couple of friends that I have (who never come visit me -- the few times we hang out, I'm the one who ends up going over) and I haven't left the house in a month and a half. Ever since graduating in June, I have not found a job and haven't applied for one in more than a month. I feel like I am sinking into a larger pit more and more every day.

I used to be able to escape the pain with drugs, but not any longer. My foolish heart is broken and I want nothing more to wither away and die.

Sorry for venting.
 
Sun Drugs said:
I'm in a lot of pain right now. A little bit over a year ago I became romantically involved with a girl. It was brilliant for a couple of months. Then for some stupid reasons (I had been coming off a relationship with the only person I had ever loved) I got scared and decided to back away. We stopped talking. I broke her heart.

Now that I am ready to get my life back in order, I decided to talk to her after 8 months of silence. We decide to talk as friends again, and she makes it clear she is not interested romantically. We talked on the phone for an hour and I was feeling all giddy again. Then I find out she has been dating someone for a few months, and my heart shatters. Even though I have no right to feel this way, I am just completely crushed.

I've had two relationships in my life and have squandered them both away. I don't know what is wrong with me. On top of that, I've been taking kratom every day for the last few months. I live 30 minutes away from the couple of friends that I have (who never come visit me -- the few times we hang out, I'm the one who ends up going over) and I haven't left the house in a month and a half. Ever since graduating in June, I have not found a job and haven't applied for one in more than a month. I feel like I am sinking into a larger pit more and more every day.

I used to be able to escape the pain with drugs, but not any longer. My foolish heart is broken and I want nothing more to wither away and die.

Sorry for venting.
Click to expand...

First of all, congrats on graduating. Woot¬!
Second, downers ain't the answer. If you're being tossed about in the sea, closing your eyes and going to sleep isn't the answer. You need to paddle like hell and get to the shore if you want to live.
The answer to every heart break ever is patience.
I know it can engulf every waking moment in misery but you need to get up and feed your self. By feed, I of course mean earn a living.
Once you fill your pockets; get clean, get therapy, get a better life.
 
Ashes said:
First of all, congrats on graduating. Woot¬!
Second, downers ain't the answer. If you're being tossed about in the sea, closing your eyes and going to sleep isn't the answer. You need to paddle like hell and get to the shore if you want to live.
The answer to every heart break ever is patience.
I know it can engulf every waking moment in misery but you need to get up and feed your self. By feed, I of course mean earn a living.
Once you fill your pockets; get clean, get therapy, get a better life.
Click to expand...

Thank you so, so much. I thought I could deal with my life long problems of lack of energy/drive/motivation by temporarily using drugs to help me obtain a job and then wean myself off. Instead i ended up just becoming accustomed to not doing much of anything with my life.

I also recently qualified for health care under my parents due to the health care act (for another 8 months until I turn 26) and my plan apparently covers mental health and substance abuse. I'm scared something like that will go on my record or something though, not to mention the fact that I am terrified of human contact and can't even pick of the phone to make an appointment.

My goal for tomorrow will be to make an appointment.

Thank you very much. I often have problems with scattered thoughts, shyness, and anxiety when other human beings are around and thus have severe problems communicating, so I appreciate the fact that you responded to me. I have been bottling up my feelings for a very, very long time.
 
In the IRC we were discussing setting up some online boardgame nights. Anyone here interested in this? Speaking from experience, it can be very very fun.
 
jb1234 said:
A year ago, my then-best friend and I were totally stoked because the FFX remaster had been announced. We were going to play it together, over Skype. And then stuff happened, he stopped talking to me because everyone does in the end and I texted him a pic of my copy this morning, which I got today. Nothing. Fuck him. Fucking asshole. FUCKING ASSHOLE. And the worst part is that I can't figure out whether I'm calling him the asshole or myself.
Click to expand...
I am on a tablet so excuse any errors. But, I feel your pain. I am going through something very similar with my only friend left in town. It's been really infuriating. I will go into more detail later but just saying I can at least somewhat understand what you're going through in this regards.
 
Sun Drugs said:
Thank you very much. I often have problems with scattered thoughts, shyness, and anxiety when other human beings are around and thus have severe problems communicating, so I appreciate the fact that you responded to me. I have been bottling up my feelings for a very, very long time.
Click to expand...

Thank you for thanking me. Mental Health Gaf appreciates your compliments. :P

As to replies, the nature of thread, [for both lurkers and participants/] means it isn't always possible to reply to every post. [depressing thread is depressing. La-di-da, la-di-da, la la].

However! Fear not! Do not despair! [See what I did there!] The op is perhaps one of the most useful ops on GAF. Anyone who is lurking should definitely feel free to utilise it. In fact. Go there right now.

Also, just writing it out, can help a little.
 
I have been getting sadness from lots of things over the past two weeks, some of which I feel is disproportionate. "It's always something".

The major problem that started this is the place I work at is going to shut down due to losing a tender, after I was given in January hope of getting funding for big progress there in my career.

Now lots of things make me frustrated and sad.

I have a significant family history of depression and will arrange to speak with someone to try to to get at it early if it is something.
 
Darkmakaimura said:
I am on a tablet so excuse any errors. But, I feel your pain. I am going through something very similar with my only friend left in town. It's been really infuriating. I will go into more detail later but just saying I can at least somewhat understand what you're going through in this regards.
Click to expand...

It's infuriating in that he just gave up when things got tough. Sure, I was relying on him more than was perhaps ideal (although not as much as you'd think) but I wasn't nearly as much of a handful to him as I've been to some of the people who can read this post and they're still sticking with me (God knows why at times). Even if he comes crawling back, I don't think I'd be able to forgive or trust him again.

I just miss him terribly. He was my best friend.
 
coldvein said:
you just lost your best friend?
Click to expand...

Nah, it was a while back. He always had periods where he'd go silent for weeks on end but we'd usually pick back where we left off, a "text every day" relationship, along with fairly frequent headset gaming marathons. Around this time last year, these silent periods were becoming more frequent. Eventually, he stopped texting altogether. He'd reply when I'd send something but the conversation was half-hearted and would soon die. Eventually, I saw no point in continuing if he couldn't hold up his end of the friendship and all communication stopped. I haven't heard from him since last October.

(I even tried to provoke him once a few months back, called him an ass. That didn't work either, no response. But he IS an ass.)
 
well fuck him then. move on.

ive had similar shit with "boys" of mine recently.

if you come out of it feeling janked then fuck them.
 
MikeDip said:
In the IRC we were discussing setting up some online boardgame nights. Anyone here interested in this? Speaking from experience, it can be very very fun.
Click to expand...

Cards Against Humanity with depgaffers is great laughs! Just make sure to get bgls in as the peanut gallery! :p
 
I need some help, I get times when I can take on the world, and everything runs smooth as silk, suddenly, the high wears off and as I return to normal I start to feel lower and then whether coincidence or not, I start arguing or finding it hard to talk to my fiance.

I start to get lower and lower and I revert to making scenarios in my head about things, finding work difficult to cope with (not that it is beyond me, I just feel lacklustre at my job)
everything gets on top of me.

this continues for a while usually resulting in major flair-ups in the relationship.
I don't want to burden my fiance as we in the middle of planning for a life together.(wedding/honeymoon, flay buying etc)
she is on some ways totally opposite to me in the sense she is logical and practical and methodical, I can be emotional irrational and random.

we work so well together I don't want to strain her with my moods or as in the past bring her down to where she literally has to go to my level and beyond until I snap out of it..

is there an exercises I can do etc? or something I am doing therapy, but at my lowest I just revert to knee jerking and getting irrational or upset over the dumbest stupidest things, that I would normally never give a crap about,
I don't get aggressive I just turn into a petulant man-child and sulk and swear.

I don't want to be that anymore at my lowest, I just want to go "fuck it", realise it will pass and stable my moods out

the stupid thing is she is moving to London for me, looking at all our finances to make it all work, setting me up as step dad for her daughter in her new school, everything and I mean everything is pointing to everything is great, yet when I get low I keep reverting to thinking she is gonna dump me or I am not good enough for her.

what the hell is wrong with me??
 
Losing my handle a bit this week. Whilst being alone now is ok, because it's temporary, the idea that this is going to be my life in not too long, scares the hell out of me and does not play well with the depression. Worst part is it won't even be a sort of slow degradation to that point, it's one big fight and snap, shit im on my ass and on my own.
 
jufonuk said:
I need some help, I get times when I can take on the world, and everything runs smooth as silk, suddenly, the high wears off and as I return to normal I start to feel lower and then whether coincidence or not, I start arguing or finding it hard to talk to my fiance.

I start to get lower and lower and I revert to making scenarios in my head about things, finding work difficult to cope with (not that it is beyond me, I just feel lacklustre at my job)
everything gets on top of me.

this continues for a while usually resulting in major flair-ups in the relationship.
I don't want to burden my fiance as we in the middle of planning for a life together.(wedding/honeymoon, flay buying etc)
she is on some ways totally opposite to me in the sense she is logical and practical and methodical, I can be emotional irrational and random.

we work so well together I don't want to strain her with my moods or as in the past bring her down to where she literally has to go to my level and beyond until I snap out of it..

is there an exercises I can do etc? or something I am doing therapy, but at my lowest I just revert to knee jerking and getting irrational or upset over the dumbest stupidest things, that I would normally never give a crap about,
I don't get aggressive I just turn into a petulant man-child and sulk and swear.

I don't want to be that anymore at my lowest, I just want to go "fuck it", realise it will pass and stable my moods out

the stupid thing is she is moving to London for me, looking at all our finances to make it all work, setting me up as step dad for her daughter in her new school, everything and I mean everything is pointing to everything is great, yet when I get low I keep reverting to thinking she is gonna dump me or I am not good enough for her.

what the hell is wrong with me??
Click to expand...

You say you're doing therapy. What kind of therapy? Talk therapy or seeing a psychiatrist? If I were you, I'd go see a psychiatrist. The cyclical nature of your issue suggests something organic, not environmental.

Beyond that, you just have to keep trying to get better. If a psychiatrist and meds don't help, try cognitive therapy. Deal with as many environmental issues as you can, to help you isolate the problem and reduce overall stress.

P44 said:
Losing my handle a bit this week. Whilst being alone now is ok, because it's temporary, the idea that this is going to be my life in not too long, scares the hell out of me and does not play well with the depression.
Click to expand...

I speak here not just as a guy with a thirty year history of depression, but as an old person. Quit worrying about what the future holds. There's no way you can extrapolate your future from your present. That's one of the wonderful and terrifying things about the world. just because you're alone today, doesn't mean you'll be alone forever. I know your brain likes to make you think that's the case, but that's because your brain is terrible at guessing the future, like all of our brains are. Be okay with yourself now. You can't guess or fix what may come, you can only deal with now.
 
besada said:
You say you're doing therapy. What kind of therapy? Talk therapy or seeing a psychiatrist? If I were you, I'd go see a psychiatrist. The cyclical nature of your issue suggests something organic, not environmental.

Beyond that, you just have to keep trying to get better. If a psychiatrist and meds don't help, try cognitive therapy. Deal with as many environmental issues as you can, to help you isolate the problem and reduce overall stress.



I speak here not just as a guy with a thirty year history of depression, but as an old person. Quit worrying about what the future holds. There's no way you can extrapolate your future from your present. That's one of the wonderful and terrifying things about the world. just because you're alone today, doesn't mean you'll be alone forever. I know your brain likes to make you think that's the case, but that's because your brain is terrible at guessing the future, like all of our brains are. Be okay with yourself now. You can't guess or fix what may come, you can only deal with now.
Click to expand...

I have done CBT about my panic attacks and anxiety, atm I am seeing a therapist to talk things through about my issues. when I am stable and good the solution and how to deal with it is in my mind, it's when I get low or feel myself knee jerk, I do not go rational, I lose a grip on how to fight what I have.
it's like a revert to the me before I did the therapy.

I am trying to deal with it doing Gym. to boost my self esteem, simple things like tidying my room etc, but then I feel myself getting lower I kind of think fuck it what do all that , all I wanna do is either sleep or watch something on TV/

btw the last part I have bolded, that is the kind of thing I need to tell myself.

I just cannot think straight when I get like that, (upset) I just get info over load and emotional overload, I don't mean i will hurt myself or anyone I just get irrational and moody and negative, the strange thing is, my going into negativity/low mood is like a slow version of this, but when I get upset it just all comes out :(

I am going to read my CBT notes and keep working on this plus I have have cognitive dissonance notes as well, I will jsut have to keep reading and practice it but it is so hard, sometimes I get so confused I doubt every action I take like is this what a normal person would do? am I nuts etc, sorry had to get it off my chest.
 
jufonuk said:
I have done CBT about my panic attacks and anxiety, atm I am seeing a therapist to talk things through about my issues. when I am stable and good the solution and how to deal with it is in my mind, it's when I get low or feel myself knee jerk, I do not go rational, I lose a grip on how to fight what I have.
it's like a revert to the me before I did the therapy.

I am trying to deal with it doing Gym. to boost my self esteem, simple things like tidying my room etc, but then I feel myself getting lower I kind of think fuck it what do all that , all I wanna do is either sleep or watch something on TV/

btw the last part I have bolded, that is the kind of thing I need to tell myself.

I just cannot think straight when I get like that, (upset) I just get info over load and emotional overload, I don't mean i will hurt myself or anyone I just get irrational and moody and negative, the strange thing is, my going into negativity/low mood is like a slow version of this, but when I get upset it just all comes out :(

I am going to read my CBT notes and keep working on this plus I have have cognitive dissonance notes as well, I will jsut have to keep reading and practice it but it is so hard, sometimes I get so confused I doubt every action I take like is this what a normal person would do? am I nuts etc, sorry had to get it off my chest.
Click to expand...

Have you ever spoken to a professional about your cyclical highs and lows? Those can be classic signs of bipolar. I have a friend who told me the gym helps them manage it tremendously well, along with keeping a fairly strict schedule for themselves and eating well. They treat it as keeping themselves in balance in as many ways as possible. I myself can see how bipolar can be your mind and body gettig caught in a psychological cycle when it over compensates when trying to bring you out of a low or down from a manic high. Be careful, please. If that, or something similar is afflicting you, it can be very easy to run with the highs and severely damage your self, life and relationships.
 
So far, my start of spring break has been boring. I stay home all day doing nothing, I was about to go out and turn in two applications at Gamestop stores. But I'm lazy like always. I will forever hate myself as long as I live.
 
jb1234 said:
It's infuriating in that he just gave up when things got tough. Sure, I was relying on him more than was perhaps ideal (although not as much as you'd think) but I wasn't nearly as much of a handful to him as I've been to some of the people who can read this post and they're still sticking with me (God knows why at times). Even if he comes crawling back, I don't think I'd be able to forgive or trust him again.

I just miss him terribly. He was my best friend.
Click to expand...
I had an accident at my friend's girlfriend's place the day after Superbowl. I got sick on her guest bathroom toilet. I cleaned it up, or at least thought I did, but I apparently missed a spot or two. She raged about it to my friend and my friend went off on me calling it an 'atrocity' and that I no longer have 'visiting privileges' at his girlfriend's place.

We usually hang out every couple of weeks or so and now I don't hear from him and this happened the day after Superbowl, so beginning of February. Last I heard from him was that it was 'water under the bridge' supposedly but said to me I need to get my shit together. Anyways, he hasn't bothered to text, write or call and he apparently doesn't want to hang out with me. I don't know what to do that this point but I did shut down my Facebook.

This is my only true friend left in town. He was pretty much my "best friend" and he even considered me at least a very good friend. Hanging out meant getting out of my house and some relief. Now, I no longer have that option and I even wonder if I no longer have a friend.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Similar threads

Introducing ChatGPT Health
49
1K
Zacfoldor replied
  • Locked
Resetera saying dementia is a mental health issue. Banning users for dementia jokes while leaving suicide jokes unchecked
Drama Community 
9
591
Palliasso replied
Oscars 2026 |OT|
2 3
149
833
DKehoe replied
Sweden health minister collapses during press conference
4
359
Dr.Guru of Peru replied
Movies You’ve Watched Lately | OT | - 2026
|OT| Social  8 9 10 11 12
582
6K
DragoonKain replied
Top Bottom