ImpassionateGods
Member
Is it bad to mix ibuprofen and zoloft? I wanted to start taking the zoloft today but I had ibuprofen twice yesterday(once at 1 pm and once at 10 pm).
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Mental Health |OT| Depression & Co.
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Zaraki_Kenpachi
Member
I don't know, this so something I've struggled with a lot (especially recently) and its still hard to feel a certain way. I get mad too and they don't care and nothing matters and it sucks that they're not there but it's hard. Think about it, would you want to be around them? Being on both sides, it can be absolutely draining, especially when you're not in that mindset.
I hate to admit it but it's the reason I avoid this thread at times. It's good for support and talking, especially when feeling shitty but reading the feelings other have when I finally am happy, it makes it hard pulls me back into those similar feelings. I'm not saying it's right or you don't deserve friends but I think it's a dangerous thing to think they don't care. A lot of them do care but they don't know what to do and it can have such an impact on them that the only solution they can find is to keep a distance or push away. Not everyone is vocal too, they could be suffering something similar and it brings back things that scare them too and they don't want those feelings back. It's not your fault that happens but it's the reality of it.
The biggest thing to remember everyone has their trials and struggles, and certainly some more than others, but we all try to find a way and sometimes it's lonely because of it. The person asking how to get over a crush is what made me think of this again. I know its not what you might want to hear and it doesn't make the loneliness or sadness go away and it's an empty solace to realize it but people aren't perfect. No one person can wholely commit themselves to helping and not burdening one person is extremely important to help prevent burnout IMO. It's also compounded by the fact that we don't really know what's wrong with us... We don't always know why we feel what we feel or think what we think. We certain thoughts are so intense and you can't get rid of them. Sometimes it's not anything a friend can say or do but sort of like a virus that has to run its course. There's no medicine or antibiotic that fixes it, sometimes those feelings just have to happen and you just have to wait for it to end.
I don't have all the answers, many I'm still searching for myself but take a step back and think about how often you want to talk to someone, how often you have the feelings you do, etc.. Think about if someone relied on you that often and needed support like that while you feel what you feel, how would you respond? Your gut reaction is to say you'd always help but would you? That level of need and support for a single person until the day you die? That's why many people fade in time. You're not alone though and people don't hate you, you just have to realize the situation, especially if you're leaning hard on a single person.
Hope this makes a little sense. The easiest solution is to get more friends to spread it but I know how hard that can be when you feel like shit. The rest you wrote is just crap your mind tells you because you feel crappy. Don't let that consume you, it's not true and it'll pass in time. It's hard but don't feed those feelings.
Edit: Forgive any typos, I had to write this all on my phone.
Burger_Baron
Member
I has been brought here once again. I will try to keep this short because mobile post. 20 years. Mother died when I was 13. Long-term depression. Father oh not so loving. Expresses all the bad feelings towards me. School hasn't gone well. Friends have most of them found love, life and meaning and have moved on.
So, basically I have no friends, no stuff, no identity, and recently no home, as my dad has banished me. Nothing to grasp and hold on to, nothing to take support from. I am crashing at my friends place, but I'm clinging on on the verge of insanity, eyeing my whiskey and knife all the time. I have been sitting in the corner since thursday, banging my head to the wall, doing absolutely nothing. The days i can barely cope, but the nights are bad. They get me so stressed and anxious. Guess i fear the tomorrow and the passing of time. I have lost all my feelings and thoughts. It's just so hard to focus on anything. I mean i can still think about stuff, it's just somehow different, more hazy or foggy and hard.
So, I guess my question would be that where can I find friends or people to talk to or just basically pass time, that would be nice. I need just something to pass time.
So, basically I have no friends, no stuff, no identity, and recently no home, as my dad has banished me. Nothing to grasp and hold on to, nothing to take support from. I am crashing at my friends place, but I'm clinging on on the verge of insanity, eyeing my whiskey and knife all the time. I have been sitting in the corner since thursday, banging my head to the wall, doing absolutely nothing. The days i can barely cope, but the nights are bad. They get me so stressed and anxious. Guess i fear the tomorrow and the passing of time. I have lost all my feelings and thoughts. It's just so hard to focus on anything. I mean i can still think about stuff, it's just somehow different, more hazy or foggy and hard.
So, I guess my question would be that where can I find friends or people to talk to or just basically pass time, that would be nice. I need just something to pass time.
Where do you live ? because if ti is in a big city then meetup.com may help you find some like minded people . I couldn't find anything that interested me in new haven but I hope that you can your area .
I have to write a ten page research paper on a health policy issue and I was wondering if mental gaf had any suggestions . It needs to deal with policy like laws and whatnot
.
Cameron122
Member
I am tired of the gap between who I am and who I want to be
To depgaf_user774 (IRC ~3 minutes ago)
If you still want to chat or confide or whatever you think you need, don't hesitate to send a PM. Shit's rough. But you aren't alone. Misery might love company, but it is one fine as hell company we've got around here. So stick around for a bit.
If you still want to chat or confide or whatever you think you need, don't hesitate to send a PM. Shit's rough. But you aren't alone. Misery might love company, but it is one fine as hell company we've got around here. So stick around for a bit.
Collete
Member
I want to cry....but I'm unable to...
My cat got bitten last night and now he's gone missing and no matter where I look, he's not there...I'm hopping he'll come back tonight from where he is to get his canned food but I was supposed to take him to the vet today to get him checked out....
My cat got bitten last night and now he's gone missing and no matter where I look, he's not there...I'm hopping he'll come back tonight from where he is to get his canned food but I was supposed to take him to the vet today to get him checked out....
thoseAREmySHOES
Member
I ran across this link about describing introverts... while simplistic full of stereotypes, there still is some decent information in a bite sized article.
http://www.joinblush.com/introverts/
The one thing that I particularly like is the "We Need You" section, because it's so true. While I love to be alone and recharge, I definitely need my extroverted friends to save me from becoming a total shut in.
http://www.joinblush.com/introverts/
The one thing that I particularly like is the "We Need You" section, because it's so true. While I love to be alone and recharge, I definitely need my extroverted friends to save me from becoming a total shut in.
Yup. I'm actually impressed that you diagnosed it with just one of my posts when it took my doctors six years.
Fortunately, leaning on one person isn't one of my problems (at least not any more). I have a pretty big support group here on D-GAF and keep in close contact with just under fifteen people, all of whom are willing to put up with my shit. I tell myself that at least part of the time, that means I have to be doing something right although a lot of those friendships were formed during a period when I was somewhat more stable than I am now.
I've been trying to push people away, because I believe that I'll be dying soon. And in all likelihood, that will be my fate. I told myself that I didn't want people to suffer any more than they have to and there are many people here who I love more than I ever thought I could love someone. We've all been through so much together. But then, a Dutch ass talked to me and pointed out that it'll likely hurt my loved ones more to be shoved aside, knowing that I'm suffering alone, as opposed to being there and doing what they can to help me, until the end. And it's hard to argue with that logic.
I'm an asshole. But at least I'm not an asshole who is alone.
Zaraki_Kenpachi
Member
It feels like more and more the only thing I come back to is I just want this to be over. I can't do this rollercoaster anymore. I've never felt something so terrible before. It's 3-4 days of numb feeling where I just feel nothing and can't even get myself to feel happy or sad or anything to 1-2 days of absolutely crippling depression. Sometimes the spacing is different but I've been stuck in this cycle for a while. It's just complete apathy at this point. I'm not sad or scared or anything, I'm just numb. I just want the ride to be over.
Do you know if it was just a quick bite or more heavy damage? If it's minor he might have just literally went off to lick his wounds and is moody and keeping to himself. If you have a blanket, some newspapers, a towel or something he tends to lay on a lot, try leaving that outside around the food and see if he comes back to it? I heard this works for dogs but the comfort/scent thing should be the same with cats I figure. /shrug
I suffer from Depression, Social Anxiety, and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. I'm taking Neurontin, Tegretol, and Zoloft but they haven't been functioning as they used to. I had stopped drinking for 4 years, but I've been hitting the bottle again. I hate when I do this because I end up doing stupid things and feeling immense guilt the day after. My sensitivity is way to high to the point that I just have to avoid people and conversations because I get agitated. Even online communication affects me emotionally here and there because I can't just not give a fuck. That's all I have to share.
That would be easier to do if you hadn't been banned and can't receive PMs!
Woke up today thinking what life would be like for everyone if I were dead. I can't imagine it would be too different from now. They'd cry and all, but life would move on without me. As my mom would say about my committing suicide back when she was angry, they'd stuff me in a box and keep it moving.
I still can't imagine killing myself because death still terrifies me and I'm a coward. So I'm stuck here, suffering under the weight of my own loneliness and inadequacy. Still, it'd be nice to be gone. Gone from this place. Not having to suffer anymore.
I still can't imagine killing myself because death still terrifies me and I'm a coward. So I'm stuck here, suffering under the weight of my own loneliness and inadequacy. Still, it'd be nice to be gone. Gone from this place. Not having to suffer anymore.
Omegasquash
Member
Strange...I've been hit with this "alone in the crowd" feeling, but that's only around friends and family. It's a recurring thing, but it's not predictable...could it anytime, though it's always (ALWAYS) triggered by insecurities. What makes it worse is that I KNOW it's bullshit, I KNOW that little voice in the back of my head is dead wrong, and I KNOW that talking about it helps.
I just wish the shit would stop. It messes with my mood. I'm able to keep it together all the time and no one can ever tell when it hits (except for my wife, she's a sharp one), but it takes away from good times, y'know? Just a shitty little monkey on the back that likes to let me know it's there every now and then. It's getting very, very old and annoying. Thank goodness for a supportive wife that serves as a best friend and reliable teammate.
I just wish the shit would stop. It messes with my mood. I'm able to keep it together all the time and no one can ever tell when it hits (except for my wife, she's a sharp one), but it takes away from good times, y'know? Just a shitty little monkey on the back that likes to let me know it's there every now and then. It's getting very, very old and annoying. Thank goodness for a supportive wife that serves as a best friend and reliable teammate.
The little guy won't shut up. It's like some bully that's stuck in my head and won't leave me alone.
Omegasquash
Member
Thing is...that bully is made of nothing more than my own insecurities. It's like they decide to act up and don't want to go away. It's not that it's not beatable...I know it is. I talk about it with my wife. She asks me what's bothering me and I tell her. We're close enough that she's actually able to laugh and tell me I'm a crazy son of a bitch, and I get it. She's right, and that nagging isn't anything but seeing things that aren't there. They're suggestive, ultimately hollow. That, combined with the fact that I let myself trust the one closest to me and tell her about it when she asks, makes it all the less powerful.
I just want it to stop is all. FFS it's not nearly what it used to be but just...it can piss off already.
I love your art, Bagels and Collete. Mucho jealouso.
Hi! My internet is real bad atm but if you want to send me a PM or something, I'm always available. I would offer to talk to you on IM or Steam somehow, but I like say, my internet is really in/out.
Hi! My internet is real bad atm but if you want to send me a PM or something, I'm always available. I would offer to talk to you on IM or Steam somehow, but I like say, my internet is really in/out.
Collete
Member
I saw that on tumblr this morning, it's one of your bests I think!
Now I just gotta motivate myself to draw again...I lost all my progress last night while drawing...My art program crashed and all I'm left with is an ugly outline and nothing more....*sigh*
It was a major bite and puss started to form yesterday.
I managed to contain him today and got him to the vet this morning. It seems he's infected and has to take antibiotics for a week or so. I'm just hoping it's nothing too serious. But I'm still worried....
Aww thank you. It's not that great, but I appreciate the compliment all the same.
Bringing this up again from yesterday.
It's great that you got to him and to the vet right away. Cats are really resillient but antibiotics should be just the extra bit of help he needs. Did the vet want you to do any cleaning or just keep him inside and on antibiotics? Glad you found your kitty. :3 I always worry what mine will get into when he tries to make a break for it.
I just woke up so you might have to deal with a groggy MikeDip but PM me if you still need to talk to someone!
A Human Becoming
More than a Member
I'm sorry for your loss. Hit up the IRC if you want someone to talk to or PM me.
I feel like my depressed state has no end in sight currently. Nearing over a month now.
Cameron122
Member
im pooped
im sorry for your loss Wilsongt
im sorry for your loss Wilsongt
ImpassionateGods
Member
Depression is basically a prerequisite for being a member of my family at this point. We got a dog to try and give my sister something else to live for and my mom is so utterly miserable she tells me the only way out is for her to die. "If I have to live with the dog I'd rather not live". I told her she was more important than him and that we could take him back to the shelter(no-kill) but she ignored that. Is this serious? What can I do to make the situation better? I try to help as much as possible but she won't let me or my sister take the dog for walks alone(so she has to come on every one) and whenever he sees another dog he starts barking and growling. Sometimes he'll try to attack. My mom is falling apart over all of this on top of everything else in her life.
Cameron122
Member
AGHHHH EVERYTHING I DO IS WRONG
I am so going to bomb my Biology II final tomorrow... School is the only thing I have going for me at this point, too. I can't even do that right anymore, though...
I know that feel.
I know that feel.
Burger_Baron
Member
Friday. Where all the hoomans at?
Hey folks. I figure I would ramble much of my views here. Consider it a public journal, feel free to read it, and if you want, feel free to converse with me. I do wish to preface I may very easily have views or ideas you may not share, so I do apologize if I offend.
Lately I have been feeling very, very depressed, over the same issues I have long talked about here. For those that don't know my situation, I'll elaborate; I feel I am in a situation where I am not where I want to be, and that I am not doing what I want to do. However, I feel no matter what choice I make, the conclusion of that choice is absolutely unacceptable and unsatisfactory. I have noticed in classes I am starting to tank all of my work, as for example, a class I normally get 90's in I am now getting straight 70's in. In fact, one class where I am the most engaged of all of my peers, I have gotten only one test in the 80's, as everything is below that, typically in the 50's and 40's. You might say "bullshit you're the most engaged if you're getting grades like that", but even my professor notices, and it relates exactly to what I feel my issue is. Academia, to me, is nothing more than a means to an end. I feel I am doing things I do not like doing in order to go on doing things I do not like doing in the raw hope of a chance that the goodie at the end is worth it, and every day this continues, the less and less I feel it is worthwhile. I am given arguments that I am a senior, this is my last year, keep on the horse, but all of these responses are by people who fail to think the way I do, and their words are hollow, no different than the people who say getting money is the most important thing in life. I think it is pure nonsense and idiotic, and I frankly choose to reject that assertion, even if it would cause me to suffer and/or die.
I think how we live is often in conflict with living. What I mean by this is that when you look at the world as it is, there is no imperfection. No star is wrong, no tree is shitty, no life form is lacking. Everything is fundamentally equal, valid, and perfect as it is. This goes with no shock that how we live in a cultural, social sense that we have absolutely fucking failed at living in accordance to this. We say this is good, we say this is bad, we say certain people are inferior, and we especially say you are not good enough today. Our culture has been consistently rigged that today is a period of impoverishment, and that the greatness comes tomorrow. You can't do shit today, so get a degree tomorrow. You can't do what you want now, so keep on this until you retire so you can do what you want to do then. This type of cancerous thinking totally misses the point of the present moment: the present moment is the only tangible period of time where you can think or act. The past is a memory that is forever trailing off, and the future is mostly conceptual, an idea of what can be. But what is, and always is, is the present moment. Why do we fail to emphasize this, instead willing to choose constant mirages?
Realizing this, I've come to the position that time is the most important thing in life. No matter what you choose to do, your time should be the most critical thing you consider, but in our lives, how we live, we choose to blunder it all away. We spend lives chasing things to be a somebody, we push what really interests us down an indefinite road. I feel at odds with the world, for I see the greatness in the world, but the depravity in how we live on it. We don't really live in the world in a sense, we live on it. We don't live in accordance with nature, we live in a way that wants to strangle nature, to show it who's the boss. Perhaps today the issues the human race are so toxic, so huge, so pervasive are all rooted in conflict with what is against what we think it should be. How we live today is absolutely flawed, a cancer on the world, and I for one have no idea on how to function with it. I can only feel the reasonable response is to reject it, almost entirely. Doing that seems to guarantee I will have a short life, for I will not be playing the same social game as everyone else. I will not be living looking for money. I will not be living looking for temporary pockets of security and safety. I will be instead stuck batting heads with stupidity, with hatred, with incompassion, until I finally say "fuck it" and just opt out of the living experience entirely. The futility of it all astounds me.
I grow tired of living in a world where I am constantly imposed with false ideas that I am imperfect, that I am not whole, that I am lacking. Why do I require "salvation" for something later? An afterlife, a degree, a retirement package? Why is today terrible? All of this thinking has made me realize I am not long for this world. For some of you who have spoken to me personally, you know very well what I think is often in conflict with the status quo: for example, if I were in a position of illness and had to choose between bankruptcy and death, I would choose death because of the pure fucking stupidity about the other option actually being a serious option. I choose not to play along to this shit any longer. I have already chosen to not live a life doing whatever for money, as this is mostly a waste of time; you waste your time doing things you don't like doing in order to continue living, which is repeating the pattern of mediocrity. I shouldn't have to explain how fucking stupid that is, but our common sense has been rigged to believe that this is reasonable. I would choose to live a short life in accordance to what I value, what I have found validation with, instead of the hollow words and barking of peers and "superiors". I feel too that this is now applying to my college experience: I am wasting my time doing things I don't want to do and the cycle continues. It's the same shit, the same idea that you are a nobody, you are impoverished, and you have to play a game to be a somebody, to get the goodie. If this is what life is all about, I willingly opt out. This is wasteful, and if we really believe this, we have failed. We have failed to realize the significance of other things, of other people, to judge and put down others, to emphasize concepts beyond real, tangible things...for all of the good the human species has done, we are also a blight, a genuine cancer on the world.
I say all of this even acknowledging what I wish to do. Grasping the present, knowing time is your real currency, you become liberated. You realize the potential in being able to do things, but in my experience, we seldom give people the ability to optimize this. It's always a game of jumping through hoops. My life, as simple as it is and as I want it to be, is thus; I simply wish to be in a position to be an ear or a hand to those who suffer, however they suffer, wherever they suffer. This vagueness, this simplistic idea, almost seems to have no foundation in the world I see. It is a world full of unending promotions, unending petty games of being more of a somebody. I am left lost to really, optimally capitalize what I want to do of the present in a world that has done nothing but piss on the present. I feel defeated. I will not play the social game to get there, for I feel it is a hollow game. But by rejecting it, I assume I have guaranteed I will not be able to have that life at all, that absurd catch 22. Quite frankly, if that is the case, if we have rigged our social game to that level...it might be better off that I say fuck it, and don't even bother. Live the life of a leech, or a hermit, until that gets old and opt out of living altogether. Maybe I should live avoiding the nonsense until I can't any longer, then it becomes time to stop living.
That's my rambling. Feel free to disagree, to find some of my views absurd, or whatever. I quite frankly don't care if you think my views are alarming. I find them reasonable and more rational than the nonsense perpetrated to us by others. I would take supposed nonrational views over irrational views any day of the week. If, for whatever reason you wish to respond to that or speak to me, go right ahead. Perhaps it would be fun to entertain my sinking ship with other people.
Lately I have been feeling very, very depressed, over the same issues I have long talked about here. For those that don't know my situation, I'll elaborate; I feel I am in a situation where I am not where I want to be, and that I am not doing what I want to do. However, I feel no matter what choice I make, the conclusion of that choice is absolutely unacceptable and unsatisfactory. I have noticed in classes I am starting to tank all of my work, as for example, a class I normally get 90's in I am now getting straight 70's in. In fact, one class where I am the most engaged of all of my peers, I have gotten only one test in the 80's, as everything is below that, typically in the 50's and 40's. You might say "bullshit you're the most engaged if you're getting grades like that", but even my professor notices, and it relates exactly to what I feel my issue is. Academia, to me, is nothing more than a means to an end. I feel I am doing things I do not like doing in order to go on doing things I do not like doing in the raw hope of a chance that the goodie at the end is worth it, and every day this continues, the less and less I feel it is worthwhile. I am given arguments that I am a senior, this is my last year, keep on the horse, but all of these responses are by people who fail to think the way I do, and their words are hollow, no different than the people who say getting money is the most important thing in life. I think it is pure nonsense and idiotic, and I frankly choose to reject that assertion, even if it would cause me to suffer and/or die.
I think how we live is often in conflict with living. What I mean by this is that when you look at the world as it is, there is no imperfection. No star is wrong, no tree is shitty, no life form is lacking. Everything is fundamentally equal, valid, and perfect as it is. This goes with no shock that how we live in a cultural, social sense that we have absolutely fucking failed at living in accordance to this. We say this is good, we say this is bad, we say certain people are inferior, and we especially say you are not good enough today. Our culture has been consistently rigged that today is a period of impoverishment, and that the greatness comes tomorrow. You can't do shit today, so get a degree tomorrow. You can't do what you want now, so keep on this until you retire so you can do what you want to do then. This type of cancerous thinking totally misses the point of the present moment: the present moment is the only tangible period of time where you can think or act. The past is a memory that is forever trailing off, and the future is mostly conceptual, an idea of what can be. But what is, and always is, is the present moment. Why do we fail to emphasize this, instead willing to choose constant mirages?
Realizing this, I've come to the position that time is the most important thing in life. No matter what you choose to do, your time should be the most critical thing you consider, but in our lives, how we live, we choose to blunder it all away. We spend lives chasing things to be a somebody, we push what really interests us down an indefinite road. I feel at odds with the world, for I see the greatness in the world, but the depravity in how we live on it. We don't really live in the world in a sense, we live on it. We don't live in accordance with nature, we live in a way that wants to strangle nature, to show it who's the boss. Perhaps today the issues the human race are so toxic, so huge, so pervasive are all rooted in conflict with what is against what we think it should be. How we live today is absolutely flawed, a cancer on the world, and I for one have no idea on how to function with it. I can only feel the reasonable response is to reject it, almost entirely. Doing that seems to guarantee I will have a short life, for I will not be playing the same social game as everyone else. I will not be living looking for money. I will not be living looking for temporary pockets of security and safety. I will be instead stuck batting heads with stupidity, with hatred, with incompassion, until I finally say "fuck it" and just opt out of the living experience entirely. The futility of it all astounds me.
I grow tired of living in a world where I am constantly imposed with false ideas that I am imperfect, that I am not whole, that I am lacking. Why do I require "salvation" for something later? An afterlife, a degree, a retirement package? Why is today terrible? All of this thinking has made me realize I am not long for this world. For some of you who have spoken to me personally, you know very well what I think is often in conflict with the status quo: for example, if I were in a position of illness and had to choose between bankruptcy and death, I would choose death because of the pure fucking stupidity about the other option actually being a serious option. I choose not to play along to this shit any longer. I have already chosen to not live a life doing whatever for money, as this is mostly a waste of time; you waste your time doing things you don't like doing in order to continue living, which is repeating the pattern of mediocrity. I shouldn't have to explain how fucking stupid that is, but our common sense has been rigged to believe that this is reasonable. I would choose to live a short life in accordance to what I value, what I have found validation with, instead of the hollow words and barking of peers and "superiors". I feel too that this is now applying to my college experience: I am wasting my time doing things I don't want to do and the cycle continues. It's the same shit, the same idea that you are a nobody, you are impoverished, and you have to play a game to be a somebody, to get the goodie. If this is what life is all about, I willingly opt out. This is wasteful, and if we really believe this, we have failed. We have failed to realize the significance of other things, of other people, to judge and put down others, to emphasize concepts beyond real, tangible things...for all of the good the human species has done, we are also a blight, a genuine cancer on the world.
I say all of this even acknowledging what I wish to do. Grasping the present, knowing time is your real currency, you become liberated. You realize the potential in being able to do things, but in my experience, we seldom give people the ability to optimize this. It's always a game of jumping through hoops. My life, as simple as it is and as I want it to be, is thus; I simply wish to be in a position to be an ear or a hand to those who suffer, however they suffer, wherever they suffer. This vagueness, this simplistic idea, almost seems to have no foundation in the world I see. It is a world full of unending promotions, unending petty games of being more of a somebody. I am left lost to really, optimally capitalize what I want to do of the present in a world that has done nothing but piss on the present. I feel defeated. I will not play the social game to get there, for I feel it is a hollow game. But by rejecting it, I assume I have guaranteed I will not be able to have that life at all, that absurd catch 22. Quite frankly, if that is the case, if we have rigged our social game to that level...it might be better off that I say fuck it, and don't even bother. Live the life of a leech, or a hermit, until that gets old and opt out of living altogether. Maybe I should live avoiding the nonsense until I can't any longer, then it becomes time to stop living.
That's my rambling. Feel free to disagree, to find some of my views absurd, or whatever. I quite frankly don't care if you think my views are alarming. I find them reasonable and more rational than the nonsense perpetrated to us by others. I would take supposed nonrational views over irrational views any day of the week. If, for whatever reason you wish to respond to that or speak to me, go right ahead. Perhaps it would be fun to entertain my sinking ship with other people.
AFollowerNotALeader
Member
Well. Heartbleed has been a pretty critical hit to my sanity this week.
It is literally the sort of nightmare that my OCD causes me to repeat rituals and have strict doctrines to prevent and it's actually happened.
I spent most of the week stumbling from one blind panic attack to another.
I'm mostly OK today because all of the things I really care about are now safe.
I'm just suffering from not having slept or eaten properly since Monday and being in a constant state of panic. (This combined with the little panic aftershocks which happen).
I actually got >3 hours sleep last night and I've just for lunch had my first full meal since Monday.
If the IT staff in your place of work look harrassed, dazed, panicked or are merely curled up in a ball and rocking back and forth, please thank them for dealing with this for you.
And if you are one of those IT staff, hang in there.
I feel like the CVE information should have come with a list of phone numbers for local suicide hotlines.
It is literally the sort of nightmare that my OCD causes me to repeat rituals and have strict doctrines to prevent and it's actually happened.
I spent most of the week stumbling from one blind panic attack to another.
I'm mostly OK today because all of the things I really care about are now safe.
I'm just suffering from not having slept or eaten properly since Monday and being in a constant state of panic. (This combined with the little panic aftershocks which happen).
I actually got >3 hours sleep last night and I've just for lunch had my first full meal since Monday.
If the IT staff in your place of work look harrassed, dazed, panicked or are merely curled up in a ball and rocking back and forth, please thank them for dealing with this for you.
And if you are one of those IT staff, hang in there.
I feel like the CVE information should have come with a list of phone numbers for local suicide hotlines.
Burger_Baron
Member
Is there someone here I can talk to? Pm to me if there is, but I will pour alot of self-pity.
Sure. PM me any time you want.
Darkmakaimura
Can You Imagine What SureAI Is Going To Do With Garfield?
I really need some help right now. I haven't slept in two days and I might be getting kicked out of where I live currently. I'm seriously looking at and am on the verge of calling it quits, if you know what I mean and right now, I'm worried sick, I'm very tired and all around angry, depressed, sad. I should have my medical insurance from the Affordable Care Act because according to the site, I was approved. I don't know what it covers. I don't want to go to the state run mental health but I don't know if there's a psychologist or psychiatrist I can actually make an appointment with using my insurance. I'm so tired and out of it, I don't know what to do. I don't know what's going to happen with me. But honestly, I want to just quit today.... right now. I need more helps than I can think of right now.
A Human Becoming
More than a Member
I as well. Misery loves company.
MisterLuffy
Member
Even though I pay attention in class, at the same time I lack at being a good listener. Because of that, I always forget what I've learned from lectures. I'm impressed with my friend whose on the internet during class today but he's a good listener and understood the lecture. Also, I'm bad at note takings based of my instructor's lecture because I can't register the information into my brain or my brain is very slow in taking information. I forget very fast. I don't know what to do about this problem.
grap3fruitman
Banned
My mom passed last night. She's been sick for a while, so it wasn't unexpected and I've had time to cope with it but it still sucks. I'm kind of just numb right now. I feel worse for my brothers. I'm the oldest of three and the youngest is still in high school. It has to be harder on them, I think. I had my mommy for longer. We were all an hour away, stuck in traffic, from seeing her so we didn't even get to day our goodbyes. Sigh...
If you are forgetful, you should consider doing things to counter this. If you can't rely on your mind (I seldom take notes), then you have to rely on other things. Have you considered maybe trying to take notes about the central themes of whatever the class is about? Not notes on everything, but deducing what seems to be the core theme of the lecture or presentation, and then stacking on that? Can you ask the professors if you can record the audio of the class? There's lots of little tricks to help a bouncy mind.
You may not have been there in her last moments, but there should be some respite in you and the others regarding your intent to see her, your intent to be there for her. Unassumed factors played a role in delaying your arrival, but that's not as if you chose to not see her at all. Even if she is gone as a living person she is still alive in a sense: she will be in your memory, and as long as that is the case you can always trail from your memory back to when she was here. By doing that in the present it still keeps that person around and here now, for her existence is remembered from others now. This is how I look at it with the passing of my mother-in-law, but maybe it's more of my philosophical perspective that eases me the most.
If you want someone to be an ear to you, feel free to PM me. It is no issue, but a reminder to you that you are not alone with your feelings and sorrows.
Why do you feel this way?
I'm coping with a breakup from February, and at times I feel ok and that I am managing well. However there are times like tonight and last night where I just feel lonely. Sitting in my apartment alone wishing I was with someone, anyone, so that I wouldn't be on my own. I try and contact friends about making plans but they're always unavailable. I feel trapped.
I feel I invest so much energy and emotion in people and just get little or nothing in return. I'm sure the popular belief amongst more mentally healthy people is that you shouldn't need to expect anything from anyone, particularly your friends, but there are just times when I feel like I should be included more often than I ever am. Fuck it, I just don't get included. Everyone in my online social circle would sooner talk to someone else than me, even if I go, day after day, to make the efforts to accommodate them or treat them as a good friend. People just seem to have the right words to satiate me, but they don't back it up when I need it most, and so it leaves me empty, feeling like the words they have are just hollow.
I feel like I'm a pretty good person and overall a reasonably decent friend to most, so it just upsets me a whole lot, like tonight. I'm just at a breaking point with a few people in my life and I don't really want to be, yet I am.
See, this is one of the reasons why I have such trouble with attaching the word "friend" to people. Particulary online. Are you really friends, whatever that term might mean for you, or do you just happen to have 1 or 2 common interests that you guys talk about?
Zaraki_Kenpachi
Member
I've had this problem for ages. I don't know if any "friend" has even contacted me. If I don't start conversations then I never hear from then again.
Yeah, I have a similar attitude. Hence why I said the word "people" a lot in that post. But still, other people call me a friend, and often I'm reluctant to say the same back. To me, though, being a friend is more than just talking to you a few times a day on Twitter or whatever, which is the pinnacle of most social interaction for me.
Those people I do call friends of, I have high hopes and - perhaps unfair - expectations of. And so it's all the more crushing when you're not feeling a lot of consideration from their way. I don't know. Maybe I'm just a whiny, self-absorbed prick. I don't really know.
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