Darkmakaimura
Can You Imagine What SureAI Is Going To Do With Garfield?
Other than occasional correspondence, no. I'm guessing he feels I closed it because of him.
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Mental Health |OT| Depression & Co.
- Thread starter Bagels
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Charles Foster Kane
Rosebud
I was seeing a therapist, but didn't think it was helping me in any way, so I just quit.
LaserBuddha
Member
Never mind.
I recently came to the realization that a lot of my antisocial attitudes are purely due to the fact that I can't stand being around anyone who is happier or more fulfilled than me. It's petty, but having to socialize with anyone who has a family or a well-paying job fills me with an intensely caustic jealousy, especially if they're around my own age.
I could go on about what this has done to my life for a dozen paragraphs, but I need to know how to overcome this soon. It's already killed all of my friendships, but in two months my sister, who is essentially my only family in the whole world, is marrying into an incredibly wealthy family, and she insists that I "get to know" everyone and integrate myself into their circles because they're going to be my family. I'm already an introverted person as it is, but the thought of suddenly being obligated to regularly associate with these fulfilled, well-adjusted people who have people who love them, total freedom to live the lives that they want to live, and can't identify with what I've been through in my life just makes me want to cry. It doesn't help that, from a socio-political standpoint, I already have a hard time seeing 1%ers as anything other than malevolent sociopaths who regard me as expendable garbage, but compound that with the fact that I can't stop projecting my extreme dissatisfaction with where I am in life onto other people and I feel like I'm headed for emotional disaster.
I know I'm a piece of shit for being so prejudicial, but a total blackout on situations where I have to contemplate my own loneliness and failure is one of the only things keeping me going. I'm scared of how having to confront it more than I already do will affect me.
I could go on about what this has done to my life for a dozen paragraphs, but I need to know how to overcome this soon. It's already killed all of my friendships, but in two months my sister, who is essentially my only family in the whole world, is marrying into an incredibly wealthy family, and she insists that I "get to know" everyone and integrate myself into their circles because they're going to be my family. I'm already an introverted person as it is, but the thought of suddenly being obligated to regularly associate with these fulfilled, well-adjusted people who have people who love them, total freedom to live the lives that they want to live, and can't identify with what I've been through in my life just makes me want to cry. It doesn't help that, from a socio-political standpoint, I already have a hard time seeing 1%ers as anything other than malevolent sociopaths who regard me as expendable garbage, but compound that with the fact that I can't stop projecting my extreme dissatisfaction with where I am in life onto other people and I feel like I'm headed for emotional disaster.
I know I'm a piece of shit for being so prejudicial, but a total blackout on situations where I have to contemplate my own loneliness and failure is one of the only things keeping me going. I'm scared of how having to confront it more than I already do will affect me.
Why do you automatically assume these people live perfect lives simply due to the fact that they're in money, or part of a large family? You don't know anything about these people, by the sounds of it. You don't know what they've been through personally. Socially. Financially. What do you really have to lose by getting to know them? Either your prejudice is confirmed and they're elitist assholes or they're actually totally reasonable people beneath the surface, but you won't find out by avoiding the situation. If it's the former, you have a validity to your argument that you don't want or need to associate yourself with these people, but if it's the latter, maybe you gain an understanding that not everyone is bracketed into the 1% you so vehemently oppose.
The problem with this kind of thinking, beyond it being so toxic - mainly to you, but to others around you as well - is that it takes on a life of its own. If your life dramatically improved tomorrow, and had a ton of money, wonderful friends, a fulfilling job, I don't think for one second you wouldn't still be comparing your life to others. There will always be people with even more money, more friends, even cooler jobs, etc etc. Is there anything on earth that would resolve those feelings?
I don't know that there is any step-by-step guide to becoming a less jealous person, but there are a couple of things that have helped me feel more at peace with things. First is the realization that people are generally much less happy than they let on. The experience of meeting someone who is smart, funny, attractive, talented, well off, etc., thinking that they seem super happy with life, and later finding out that they are just a complete mess no longer surprises me. We tend to be way more open about it in here, so I get the opposite experience - finding out that people who are so miserable can actually have all kinds of wonderful things going for them. It's harder to be jealous of people when you realize that the most super upbeat, everything is awesome, facebook page can be a defense mechanism against the bullshit in peoples' lives. I have a friend who seems like the most well adjusted, happiest girl on the planet, from a family that projects this image of being the ultimate Christian family. And man, are they all just fucked up beyond belief. I tend to take things a bit more at face value and I can remember telling my wife what a sweet, happy, wonderful person, with a wonderful life, our friend seemed, and her looking at me like I was a crazy person (in her defense, I totally am). Our friend is in the middle of a messy divorce with a guy who seemed another largely untroubled friend. It turns out they were estranged almost from day one of their marriage, and there was abusive behavior going both ways. I had zero clue.
The other thing is to realize that there are always other people who better espouse the qualities we want to be known for. I can name just from people I actually know, not counting people who are actually famous for this or that quality, people who are better looking, smarter, funnier, better read, nicer, kinder, more athletic, healthier, wealthier, more accomplished, and on and on. We all dream of being the absolute best at something, that's a societal ideal. But, in reality, it's the combination of things that make people likable. There are many, many people in this community who will tell you how utterly unlikable they are, and how they're no good at anything. Yet I really like just about everyone I interact with in here (the complete assholes don't generally last long). You have to find some level of comfort in the unique combination of things you do. You're not going to find another person who offers what you do. It helps if you are very honest with yourself about your strengths and weaknesses. I'm not the kind of person who thinks that every bad thing that happens to you is a wonderful learning experience, but at the very least, it should help you develop empathy. I was way more of a jerk before things took some serious turns for the worse in my life.
Finally, the secret weapon of the introvert is time. I'm way more extroverted than I ever thought - I'm still figuring that out. But the thing is, I still need quite a bit of time to myself. I realized that the more connected I am - and there was a time when people could and would contact me on steam, skype, IRC, text message, email, GAF, twitter, tumblr... - the less time I have to kinda develop as a person. I learn a ton from my friends, I love them dearly, and I love talking to them, but I need time to myself to read and write and practice calligraphy and write letters and do all this stuff that is key to who I am. But the neat thing is, having that introverted side, and liking to have time to myself, I can use that time to make friends and fuel the extrovert side. Here's an example:
If I'm known outside of this community on GAF, it's for making ridiculous threads about pens and pencils (which in turn got me into calligraphy). Writing each of those threads took a lot of time, spent alone, reading and writing. But the upside is that I've made friends and gotten a lot of positive encouragement because I took that time away from socializing to explore something I'm passionate about. It quickly became clear that I was NOT the most knowledgeable person about collecting pens, or drawing, or any of it. But I was the guy willing to put in a bunch of extra time to make the threads fun. People would post their incredible collections of, say, fountain pens and, much as I'd love to have some of them, any kind of feeling of jealousy was really mitigated because they liked that I made the thread, it gave them a chance to share, and I felt good because I got such nice feedback. So instead of a me vs. them mentality, I became part of this new community. It's the same with calligraphy. I'm still not great, but I practice and share what I do and check out other peoples' work. There are people with writing I would kill for, but instead of being super jealous, it's fun to interact with them and kind of be on the same team. I take my alone time to make things for people, send them messages and letters (communication that proceeds at a more leisurely, controllable pace), write things that I think people might enjoy...A lot of people are uncomfortable spending ANY time alone nowadays. You can distract yourself being social all day, but I think I get a lot out of taking some time to do things that are meaningful both to me and to other people.
That won't always work, and it's not like GAF is the friendliest place on earth, but if you find something you're good at, or are willing to work hard practicing something you want to be good at, and you present that to the world not in terms of how great or awful you are, but in the spirit of wanting to share it with others and talk to other people who are into whatever, I think it's a good start to tamping down the jealousy. Or if you want to run a marathon or learn yoga or whatever, the willingness to do it and work at it is way more endearing than being effortlessly good at it.
Having a sense of humor helps. I laugh about my own myriad shortcomings (being short is one of them) and at some point I stopped trying to hide them and now I'm pretty open about them. I get teased MERCILESSLY about all sorts of petty insecurities and I hope it's actually endearing that I'll laugh along and not leave in a huff. It helps me a ton too to learn to embrace exactly who I am and not be so negative about myself.
Damn really? That's awful. Leave a bad review for them so that people coming after you might know. It seems like the site is still very new, so it can be a bit of a hit and miss. The girl I was chatting with was absolutely amazing though, so if you feel like giving it another chance I would say you should. Just pick someone with a lot of thanks and reviews.
fierrotlepou
Member
Just started taking Abilifyl (as in, this morning) and a few minutes ago I was incredibly dizzy. Nearly fainted.
Anyone else have experience with these meds?
Anyone else have experience with these meds?
Like the hat?
Banned
Anyone taking cymbalta? I just started and it's been giving me stomach pain, diarrhea, and making me super tired. Does this go away?
I just went of of Welbutrin a couple of weeks ago. I don't feel any different (luckily!), but man do I have weird dreams now. I noticed that when I started taking it originally I wouldn't have dreams at all. They are rebounding exponentially now.
Anyone have a similar effect?
Anyone have a similar effect?
They're all the usual side effects, I was super tired for about a week till my body got used to the meds.
Darkmakaimura
Can You Imagine What SureAI Is Going To Do With Garfield?
So, anyone have any opinions on my post? I'd really like to get a few to decide what I should do. Currently, I'm thinking of doing nothing and waiting it out a couple more months and then making a final decision.
I have to mention once again this is (was?) my only friend left in town. I lose this friend, I am officially alone.
But, I can't help after reading his text feel he's coming off as a real douchebag. It pretty much seems to me it's just a way to blow me off for good.
Anyways, I'd appreciate if anyone took the time to look it over and give me an honest reply regarding it.
I have to mention once again this is (was?) my only friend left in town. I lose this friend, I am officially alone.
But, I can't help after reading his text feel he's coming off as a real douchebag. It pretty much seems to me it's just a way to blow me off for good.
Anyways, I'd appreciate if anyone took the time to look it over and give me an honest reply regarding it.
Right i'm a bit tired but I read your post here and it reminded me of a couple of friends I used to have who were similarly acting like this.
First off, I suppose it would be normal if he was a bit pissed off at you about the getting sick at his girlfriend's place. So that's ok and I'm pretty sure the girl wasn't exactly pleased either. Having said that that should not be a big enough reason for you two to go from good friends to not talking for ages.
I'm not sure why he is getting annoyed at you shutting down your facebook. Honestly it's your own prerogative and I know damn well that when you're going through shit going on facebook is probably the worst idea out there. Did you ask him why he was angry about that?
Next, the fact the way he sent you the text is just completely douchey. Saying he was only giving you a courtesy response.
Bottom line, I think you should just stop bothering. If your friend still wants to be friends he will text you too once in a while and you can pick up from there. But I would stop trying to contact him. I know it's rough but it sounds like he already wrote off your friendship and the more time you'll spend thinking and worrying about it the more time you'll only spend depressed.
Losing a friend is hard, but it's an opportunity. I'm not sure at what stage of life you are but it is easy to meet people all around. Be at work, at university or even look up some interest groups in your area and just join them. Getting out of the house is important but the important aspect of it is that you talk to someone who you enjoy talking to and is willing to listen.
Prax
Member
Well, maybe your friend is going through some upsets himself (or takes changes in general very hard? His reaction to you closing your facebook account for a while is weird--maybe he just takes things too personally.)
And even if you lose him because he's being weird/pouty, you can make new friends.
Me, personally, I would apologize if he feels hurt by me, but I'd also mention he's kind of acting like a jerk or seems to be overreacting and it confuses me.
Hopefully he'd see that and keep communication going, but you never know. People can be weird and petty, and you have yoru own issues to deal with than baby him. (Maybe he has the same sentiments? *shrug* You can probably reconnect later when the anger/annoyance disappates, hoepfully).
If possible, focus on your own interests and try to find ways to pursue them, even if you don't really have big funds for it. And then share those interests with people in some way (probably first step is online groups, but if there's a local group, that's good too).
Yes, my meds gave me crazy realistic dreams too. Unfortunately that stopped a month or so later, which sucked. I liked those dreams.
MisterLuffy
Member
A friend of mine today gave me a $50 steam card, and tbh I don't deserve it at all or want it. I kept declining his gift but won't listen. On the second project of data structure, I got him a bad grade. The reason why he gave it to me because he stated that I helped him by letting him know what I did in class and showing him my answers that I got from my brother with his help. Without my older brother's help, I wouldn't be much helpful to him. I wasn't much of a help to him at all. As much he wants me to use it, I still feel that it's wrong of me to take it. It doesn't matter what reasons I give/gave him, he still wants me to have it. What should I do?
Take it and gift games to people on NeoGAF -- actually, that's not a good idea either as he'll notice you gave games away and would probably feel miffed. I'd say take it and then ask him for any game suggestions and pick up what he suggests.
He is a friend and he gave you a gift. Take it, use it and enjoy it. Buy steam games.
MisterLuffy
Member
Yeah, if he found out about me gifting games to people or even selling it, he would be upset. I even suggested him to use it and gift me some games, but he didn't want to. I asked him before class started that he should give it to his friends, but stated that his friends didn't help him in whatever help he needed.
If I want to buy steam games, I would wait for sales because I'm cheap.
As would I (and most of Steams user base) You don't need to use it all at once, that is the point of a gift card in general, for the recipient to buy things at their leisure from one place. Start adding games to your wishlist, and take a look in the Steam thread for further games to check out in the future. Then you will be ready to put it to good use, once those discounts show up.
Honestly, I think you should consider therapy. As someone who struggles with jealousy issues himself (although not to this extent), I know how destructive and toxic it can be. It's really just fear extended outward, fear of life, fear of loss, fear of being rejected, fear of being loved. But there are always going to be people in your life who are outwardly (key word there) happier and in better shape than you. And then there will be times when life has completely massacred those same people and they are bruised and bleeding on the metaphorical sidewalk. Life is cruelly unpredictable and we're all just trying to get by.
I'm working very hard on my issues because there are people in my life I love so much and I don't want to hurt them any longer. I would totally jump into therapy myself if I were physically able to do so. Please consider getting some help.
Darkmakaimura
Can You Imagine What SureAI Is Going To Do With Garfield?
Thank you for the reply.
Yeah, what you're saying is pretty much what I'm thinking all around. I understand being upset about the puking incident, but felt it was overblown and his reaction to my closing Facebook (which I reopened) is also overblown. He has a tendency to do this with everyone. It is my good guess that now that he's in a serious relationship, he doesn't feel the need to hang out with me. That, and as I mentioned before, he probably feels I slighted him by closing my FB. I don't need to apologize for it because I've mentioned about doing this numerous times long before the puke incident ever happened.
He does take things pretty personally. Funny thing is, he is a very calm person but he gets irritated and angry easily. Not angry as in yelling or screaming but more just like a low tolerance. I don't think he's going through that hard of a time because he's in a relationship he really seems to enjoying. He's probably gone on more 'vacations' in the last few months than anyone I've ever known.
I think overall I'm going to follow Mario's advice and just stop bothering. If I see he's pretty much blown me off and won't contact me in the next couple months or so, it's safe to assume the friendship is officially over and I can just hit the 'unfriend' button on him. It's a real shame this happened because we've had very little incidents over the past few years and got along pretty well. I think now that he's in a serious relationship, he no longer has much use for me.
BigEvilTurtle
Banned
I can't do it anymore. I need help. I thought I was fine but it's gotten worse. I can't cope with anything anymore.
Collete
Member
Worked hard at all of them despite having a potential down pour of emergencies, bad luck, betrayals, and rejection!...
Fun two weeks!...-_-
I actually did a painting last Wednesday...I was just really down and didn't care anymore and knew no one would be interested since it sucked (see Zapdos).
As for the second piece....this is artwork was a request by my friend and his Youtube partner, who asked me to be their thumbnail artist for their Youtube channel. This was done in both Black Ink and Artrage 4
Hey man, it's been awhile.
What's up?
Fun two weeks!...-_-
I actually did a painting last Wednesday...I was just really down and didn't care anymore and knew no one would be interested since it sucked (see Zapdos).
As for the second piece....this is artwork was a request by my friend and his Youtube partner, who asked me to be their thumbnail artist for their Youtube channel. This was done in both Black Ink and Artrage 4
Hey man, it's been awhile.
What's up?
Oh absolutely save the money till the summer sale or whatever!
J_Macgrady
Member
Abilify made me extremely restless and it was hard to sit still for more than a min. I had to take it due to my circumstances, but I don't know if I could recommend that drug to anyone. It's known for giving users the symptoms of tardive dyskinesia
Wolf Dawgz
Member
Feeling the same sentiment. My life feels fucked.
A Human Becoming
More than a Member
I've been laying in bed almost entirely the last three days. Missed two of my classes. Feel numb and anxious.
Wolf Dawgz
Member
I've been laying in bed almost entirely the last three days. Missed two of my classes. Feel numb and anxious.
What makes you anxious about going to class?
A Human Becoming
More than a Member
Less about class and more about not wanting to leave the house or socialize with anyone.
MisterLuffy
Member
I feel like giving back the gift card to to my friend. Even though he gave me it as a gift, I still feel wrong about taking it. I wish I could give it back to him, but he's not going to want it back no matter what I say to him. I feel like I wasn't a use to him when he needs help with data structures homework. I didn't do much to deserve a steam card.
Wolf Dawgz
Member
I've been reading poetry for an English exam I have tomorrow. I was also watching a documentary on leopards, so I wanted to write a poem relating to anxiety.
Velcro Fly
Member
Good news: I might have a job!
Bad news: Job wouldn't start until August!
But the Summer would be so fucking great if I knew at the end of it I had a job. I've often thought how many of my problems would go away if I had a decent job.
Bad news: Job wouldn't start until August!
But the Summer would be so fucking great if I knew at the end of it I had a job. I've often thought how many of my problems would go away if I had a decent job.
cjp
Member
Zaraki_Kenpachi
Member
A lot of people here like seeing your paintings. You shouldn't beat yourself up or think people don't want to see them. I know quite a few people here always comment on your paintings, they're good!
Does anyone else cut ties with people they consider friends, pretty much all the time? I don't know why I do it. But I think as of this week I literally have no friends. When I left school, I instantly stopped talking to 90% of people I knew there. Stopped talking to another 5% shortly after, but I frequented a Teamspeak server and played DOTA and stuff with the rest. Now I've cut all contact with them too...these people were close friends too I guess. I've been at college 3 years, and had one friend for the first year I was here, because I knew him from school. Talked to 2 other people in my second year, but after they left I instantly cut off contact with them, and my other friend around the same time(who is still at college to this day). This year I have had 0 friends at college, and like I said, as of this week I cut contact with my online friends. Also, this doesn't really affect me as much as it probably should. I don't miss these people on the whole. I'm not a psychopath or anything, but that does make me sound that way, lol. I also don't think I'm depressed. I think I have anxiety though.
By "cut contact", I mean, all contact. I unfriend them on Facebook and every other thing I know them on. If I see them in person I stay out of their way. So people saying I should start talking to them again, it's pretty much impossible for me to do. I would have to send them friend requests and shit again, and you know they would ask why I stopped talking to them and unfriended them. There is no way I could have that conversation, lol.
Anyway, I was wondering if anyone else did or does this. I don't know why I do it. It just makes total sense in the moment. I get into an organizational sort of mood, and think "these people aren't worth the effort", "they don't really like me" or similar stuff. That stuff still kind of makes sense to me now I guess. But I don't know why I go to such extremes to cut contact with them. I'm not obsessed with tidiness in other part of my life except socially it seems. Would be nice to know if anyone else has similar thoughts.
Also, has anyone ever done CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy)? I am going to start having it in a couple weeks. Did it help you? Also, I think it is going to be via webcam or the phone, and I dunno how to feel about that.
By "cut contact", I mean, all contact. I unfriend them on Facebook and every other thing I know them on. If I see them in person I stay out of their way. So people saying I should start talking to them again, it's pretty much impossible for me to do. I would have to send them friend requests and shit again, and you know they would ask why I stopped talking to them and unfriended them. There is no way I could have that conversation, lol.
Anyway, I was wondering if anyone else did or does this. I don't know why I do it. It just makes total sense in the moment. I get into an organizational sort of mood, and think "these people aren't worth the effort", "they don't really like me" or similar stuff. That stuff still kind of makes sense to me now I guess. But I don't know why I go to such extremes to cut contact with them. I'm not obsessed with tidiness in other part of my life except socially it seems. Would be nice to know if anyone else has similar thoughts.
Also, has anyone ever done CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy)? I am going to start having it in a couple weeks. Did it help you? Also, I think it is going to be via webcam or the phone, and I dunno how to feel about that.
yeeeeeeeees. If I had a nickle for every idea I didn't act upon because I thought I couldn't adequately do it, I would be part of the Illuminati.
People who offer service workers at their home water or whatever are saints. There are literally no better people in this world and I swear they better get the best seats in heaven.
An update: Getting better at this small talk stuff. I don't just stand there awkwardly in silence all the time (But still sometimes)
An update: Getting better at this small talk stuff. I don't just stand there awkwardly in silence all the time (But still sometimes)
How does one maintain the feelings they need to have to push forward, such as enthusiasm, motivation, and passion, when there is nothing there waiting for you when you wake up? It seems like a key motivator that has never really been there, for me. It could be a job, hobby, activity, obligation, anything to make you feel like you must keep going. Nothing has given me that feeling in such a long time, to the point were I can't even remember the last time I felt passionate or committed to anything.
I've been asked quite a bit at home, and my therapy appointments what is it exactly that I would want to do. With that part of me missing, there isn't anything at all that comes to me. And with the range of things I've previously done, I was distinctly mediocre at them all. Even all of my academic results would attest to that. Even with basic interactions, I'm nothing but background noise. It just seems like there is nothing that I could actively do that would make me feel good, or accomplished. Without any of this, or skills/talents, I can't see where I could go from here that would provide any kind of positive result.
I've been asked quite a bit at home, and my therapy appointments what is it exactly that I would want to do. With that part of me missing, there isn't anything at all that comes to me. And with the range of things I've previously done, I was distinctly mediocre at them all. Even all of my academic results would attest to that. Even with basic interactions, I'm nothing but background noise. It just seems like there is nothing that I could actively do that would make me feel good, or accomplished. Without any of this, or skills/talents, I can't see where I could go from here that would provide any kind of positive result.
A Human Becoming
More than a Member
I am bad at talking to people. I need to accept this about myself so I can put my attention elsewhere.
I used to do this all the time. Trimming my facebook friend list, deleting numbers out of my phone, etc. It wasn't usually out of anger, or anything specific that happened, it just seemed like after a certain amount of time, if we hadn't spoken, I figured that we wouldn't ever again. I never did it with people I considered to be close friends at some point in my life, even if we hadn't spoken in ages, but everyone else was fair game. If I saw them in real life I'd try to avoid them or try my best to not get into a stop and chat
Now I sort of think differently. You may as well keep the door open for these people, you never know if they might wander back into your life in some way. Plus, how do you really benefit from cutting these people out?
Collete
Member
Thanks, that means a lot.
Amazing.
Prax
Member
From my understanding, as I am pretty distant too and will float away if no one puts effort into trying to contact me (and may float away anyway lol), it sounds like social anxiety with fear of obligation.
Like why would you even try to mind read and think "they probably don't like me anyway"? or "This takes too much effort"? It sounds like you are afraid of putting in effort or being expected to do something (like be a "good friend") and being rejected or disappointing them at some point, so you'd rather never have that happen and instead just disconnect.
And the cutting all contact/defriending is a part of your embarassment/fear of confrontation/fear of attachment, and then having to EXPLAIN that is even more embarassing and elicits extra questions/contact. Like why not just leave them on your list and never talk? Possibly because you still feel they are "part" of your life and are somehow tangled up in you in some symbolic way, and you just want to run away and be free.
That's my interpretation, anyway! Because I feel similar. I don't delete contacts or defriend usually though because that "signals" a person and what if they try to initiate contact with me again because of it? Just would rather disappear. Hahaha~
But yeah, it's not really healthy.
I am trying a lot more to develop and nurture the friendships I do have now because even if I don't "need" them, I am thinking of it as a self-development thing (and maybe that's a very analytical/cynical way of looking at it, but oh well). I am still not a great friend, but it's something at least. xD
I think for you, it's just best to focus on what you enjoy or remember enjoying. Just to remind you or giev you a taste of that experience again. And the develop a routine around it and just give it a try for a long while. Have it challenge you and see yoru own progress.
And it's important to remember: IT'S OKAY TO BE MEDIOCRE OR NOT THE GREATEST, MAN!!!
You don't need "skills" or "talents" (and skills develop OVER TIME anyway. Everyone has their own pace, so just be persistent!) What's most important it seems is for you justt o do soemthing mildly challenging for you and just being able to say you got it done. It doesn't have to be done int he best way, the most graceful, outstanding. Just done. That's progress. Even if it means completing a wordsearch book, or use up a book filled with calligraphy letters, or write 100 reviews to your top 100 fave things. The point is to feel a sense that you accomplished something, you have a record to prove it, and even if it's not good, it's concrete. It exists. And the hope is that these feeling will transfer over to even more ambitious aspirations and you can go onto doing cool things that you enjoy and maybe others will enjoy it too.
If people ignore list you, their advice isnt worth taking so dont worry about it.
In any case I will always think of you as a friend too.
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