A lot of people say ignorant shit about other groups that they know little about and I often have to add "minority" because it becomes "oh, white males are the cause of every problem ever". Nothing should go without saying, but everything should be explained and reasoned.
Fair enough. Thanks for explaining.
Have you ever told them what they were saying was wrong or why it's wrong?
Have you ever told another person the historical context of that word?
I gotta tell you, I learned about it and now I'll get really upset and berate and yell at people when anyone uses that slur.
Of course. I've been doing this rodeo for years now. And honestly, after a certain point, I gave up. It's hard enough explaining and teaching why words like faggot are slurs and shouldn't be used to people in person and not having them be dismissive or get defensive, but online? Honestly, the amount of times that it ended up changing nothing and having to deal with further laughter, harassment, and other bullshit for bringing it up became too much to feel like trying. It's a fight, a constant fight, and it is wearying.
I mean, I could link you to threads on GAF about that very topic -- about whether it's appropriate or OK to say faggot -- and not only do a surprising amount of people freely admit to using it, when people (like me) object to it out explain why it's hurtful, it usually gets dismissed as sensitivity, or doesn't matter because it's not to a gay person, or whatever. I can't even think of anyone who had a revelatory moment from those threads off the top of my head. Enough times that happens, you just accept that it's futile howling into the wind of cluelessness.
I'm sorry that you feel you have to hide in a fantasy world where you're supposed to feel accepted. I won't pretend to know what that's like. I don't, which is why I'm willing to fight for those who feel that way. Games are about escapism and entertainment.
It's not even so much about hiding in a fantasy world for acceptance as much as it is using media as a temporary escape from the stress and pressure of life, with mine happening to be in no small part because of that. And it comes down to having a lack of safe spaces as a gamer. I'll see people wonder why conventions like GaymerX need to exist, because aren't gay people just gamers too, and they don't see any violence at PAX, so what's so unsafe? But it's really about creating an environment where there is no harassment or threat of harassment. I have no guarantees in any online game that I won't face slurs and harassment. It doesn't feel safe or welcoming. And that's a huge problem not only for me, but any minority gamer. Because it's our hobby too.
But the gaming community is a large community to broad stroke.
Gamers encompasses a large group of people. The entrance/barrier to entry into being a gamer is having enough money and interest to buy a console/PC/Smartphone and pay for video games. That's the bar. It's not very high.
Most of us are most likely generational gamers, others are getting into it last gen. Regardless, they're all gamers.
I would never minimize someone else's experiences, because those are your experiences and I have mine.
Thank you for that last part, truly.
You're right that this is a huge group of people whose sole unifier is an interest in a single form of media. My intention isn't to say all gamers are bigots or assholes our harassers, that's obviously not true. I've met and played with awesome people in the community, including GAF. I even managed to do a GAF meet up, terrified though I was, and hung out with some cool people who made me feel welcome.
But the problem is that bringing it up in regards to criticism of patterns of behavior running throughout the gaming community makes it a Not All Gamers argument. So whole it's true, it does not address, and often unintentionally minimizes or ignores the very real and unfortunately common issues that are widespread. Not all gamers harass, but we still have a harassment problem we need to deal with. Not all gamers drop slurs, but enough do that people actively avoid voice chat because so many stay silent instead of speaking up for other gamers. Not all gamers make people feel unwelcome, but enough do whenever diversity comes up that we drive people away and create a toxic image.
Ultimately, it's not arguably about using a broad brush to paint all gamers one way, but to address the community as a whole and acknowledge problems therein for lack of an ability to single out the problem individuals.
I hope that helps explain my thoughts a bit better. Thanks for taking the time to reply.
