Since November 20th. I don't live in the UK. I wouldn't ever not consider a woman because she isn't really pretty, but physical attraction is a must. I feel like all these things are above average, yet you say otherwise...
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Mental Health |OT| Depression & Co.
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Since November 20th. I don't live in the UK. I wouldn't ever not consider a woman because she isn't really pretty, but physical attraction is a must. I feel like all these things are above average, yet you say otherwise...
I know. I'm the weird one. What do I know?
Six weeks and a day. Do you know what's special about being sad for six straight weeks?
I know. I'm the weird one. What do I know?
Six weeks and a day. Do you know what's special about being sad for six straight weeks?
Trust me, I definitely want to believe you.
I'm going to assume absolutely nothing is special about being sad for 6 straight weeks.
Nothing.
Remember dude, you're a good looking guy. (And I still want that car.)
Nothing.
(And I still want that car.)
I know you do. I'll let you ride shotgun, though. I still have some self esteem issues when it comes to my looks, however. Aren't you the guy that said he'd make out with me? lol
If it helps, that's not an uncommon offer of mine. Ask my friends!
I know how hard it is to get over self esteem issues. My main goal is for you to feel flattered, and hence temporarily better about yourself. Mileage can vary though.
It is merely a difference in subjective opinion, isn't it? You're just as qualified to be right, if not more so, than my self.
Just because you're depressed, doesn't mean you aren't smart or anything.
I think, you're just as likely to meet someone as attractive and as smart as you are.
Pretty much buddy. Your situation is somewhat complicated by grief, which is a natural reaction to a sense of loss.
Whereas Depression is an illness. Anyways, the average length of an episode of depression is 6-8 months.
And if you are mentally ill, do take it far more seriously than trying to look for this ex+1. You come first.
Are you seeing a therapist?
BrightEyedPanic
Member
...and I'm awake again. Ffffuuuuuuuuu
If it helps, that's not an uncommon offer of mine. Ask my friends!
I know how hard it is to get over self esteem issues. My main goal is for you to feel flattered, and hence temporarily better about yourself. Mileage can vary though.
I suppose it was somewhat flattering, yes.
It is merely a difference in subjective opinion, isn't it? You're just as qualified to be right, if not more so, than my self.
Just because you're depressed, doesn't mean you aren't smart or anything.
I think, you're just as likely to meet someone as attractive and as smart as you are.
Pretty much buddy. Your situation is somewhat complicated by grief, which is a natural reaction to a sense of loss.
Whereas Depression is an illness. Anyways, the average length of an episode of depression is 6-8 months.
And if you are mentally ill, do take it far more seriously than trying to look for this ex+1. You come first.
Are you seeing a therapist?
I don't believe I am mentally ill, no. I believe my heart got ripped out and I'm feeling highly depressed and hopeless because of it. I am not seeing a therapist, but I am on a low dose of depression medication because of all this. I believe it is supposed to kick in soon (1 month). I sincerely think that if I find someone as good or better than her, I will start to feel better. That void in me needs filling.
Do you want to be happy?
Be careful, dude. As someone who is the epic *master* at trying to fill gigantic voids, it's a very slippery slope.
I just didn't bother to go back to sleep when I woke up like five or six hours ago. Just easier that way.
Absolutely. I just can't stop thinking about my ex and how much I miss her.
Is it? How so?
There's an old writing trick. Whereby you write a letter to yourself. That part of you that is hurting. That innocent and vulnerable side. And won't listen to rationale thought, advice, or.. well reason.
Sometimes stuff like that works. Sitting down with ink & paper. Where you have to remind yourself that you want to be happy. Because humans are quite contradictory and forgetful.
And that you'd really like it if you could move on. And that you're actually quite cool. And would like to do a whole lot of stuff with your life.It's hard to judge the situation properly because you're still in a state of understandable grief. I'm just concerned that you've let your ex impact your self-worth so heavily to the point where you feel you need another relationship to be whole again.
There's an old writing trick. Whereby you write a letter to yourself. That part of you that is hurting. That innocent and vulnerable side. And won't listen to rationale thought, advice, or.. well reason.
Sometimes stuff like that works. Sitting down with ink & paper. Where you have to remind yourself that you want to be happy. Because humans are quite contradictory and forgetful.
I tell myself all the time I want to be happy. I quit my job and didn't sign up for the next semester at school because of how depressed I am. I need a new job asap and I need to start school back up for the summer. No woman in their right mind would want to date a guy in my position.
I've never felt so good before I was with her. I'm sure you know what I mean. That feeling of being wanted, someone always thinking about you, wanting to talk to you all the time, someone that shares your desires, wants a future with you, a family, someone your family loves, and her family loves you. I don't know how else to explain it man. It's euphoric. Some shit I read on her twitter page a month ago (after the breakup) about her having those feelings towards another guy just fucking crushed my goddamn soul.
Silphonica
Banned
Currently going through something similar, I don't have any advice to deal with it since im still struggling with it, but if you want to chat about it or have any advice for me, shoot me a pm.
A Fish Aficionado
I am going to make it through this year if it kills me
Medication?
I used to get these all the time and over ridiculous thoughts like my house collapsing.
hmmm well recently i have had a few anxiety attacks in the bed where i just feel hopeless and empty.i also have sleep problems (although getting better now) never took any meds or would want too. i believe mediation helps out alot and if your into crystal healing as well
btw I dont know if this is the wrong place to say it, but if that is you on your avatar. i would just like to say you do have pretty eyes XD
Silphonica
Banned
Sertraline 100mg, but primary is for major depressive disorder, but apparently it helps for anxiety too.
edit: I will be on 150mg sertraline in 2 week.
I may or may not have some kind of bi-polar disorder. On occasion I'll go from happy to a slowly building depression, but it's because something upsetting will suddenly come to mind. I usually write it off as, "Whatever, sad things make you sad," but I'm really not sure how it works.
I totally know what you are going through. I'm having the same situation. There's just people that you totally 100% connect with. I thought my ex was perfect for me and she told me I was perfect for her. But, I guess it wasn't for her, so you just have to move on. Find happiness in yourself and it'll work out.
And yeah, seeing that stuff sucks. Just gotta ignore it...
Silphonica
Banned
Go to a psychiatrist, I thought I had bipolar, but turns out I had Major depressive disorder and an anxiety disorder.
I love the two psychiatrists I spoke with on campus on two separate occasions. Both said my problems were too crazy and that they couldn't help me, lol
How much does that generally cost?
Silphonica
Banned
I sought help when I was in university by university provided psychs years ago,they were terrible. Thats just personal experience though.
I was in the UK dude, so it was free. (sorry)
Do you have insurance?
Exactly. Everyone is telling me I need to find happiness in myself. That seems to be the hardest part when you feel like a large chuck of you is missing.
Oh yeah, it's horrible. And a part of you will always be missing, but another part will eventually take it's place.
I'm trying to be positive about my own situation and I hope you can get there too.
Lionheart1827
Member
You'll be alright in time. Like I mentioned in your original thread, it just takes time bro.
jb1234 (and other depgaf regulars) can attest I was in much of the same position as you were when I came to Depgaf. I had been with someone I thought I was going to marry for 3 years and I was recovering from cancer at the time when she left me. I never thought I'd ever find somebody again, let alone somebody that I can feel a connection with and somebody that could understand the shit I went through. It took awhile to completely get over her, but I started to feel much better at the 3-4 month mark. It sounds like a long time, but it really isn't. Anyway, I ended up finding somebody awesome again despite my accelerating baldness(from chemotherapy), my sterility(also from the chemo, which I found recently my boys are swimming again) and my overall shyness.
You'll be fine, it seems hopeless as shit right now, but you'll be fine. Like I said, one day at a time.
It's the worst feeling in the world. It's so fucking bad that I wouldn't wish it upon my worst enemy.
You'll be alright in time. Like I mentioned in your original thread, it just takes time bro.
jb1234 (and other depgaf regulars) can attest I was in much of the same position as you were when I came to Depgaf. I had been with someone I thought I was going to marry for 3 years and I was recovering from cancer at the time when she left me. I never thought I'd ever find somebody again, let alone somebody that I can feel a connection with and somebody that could understand the shit I went through. It took awhile to completely get over her, but I started to feel much better at the 3-4 month mark. It sounds like a long time, but it really isn't. Anyway, I ended up finding somebody awesome again despite my accelerating baldness(from chemotherapy), my sterility(also from the chemo, which I found recently my boys are swimming again) and my overall shyness.
You'll be fine, it seems hopeless as shit right now, but you'll be fine. Like I said, one day at a time.
Everyone tells me this. I want to believe it, really I do. It just seems so difficult right now. It's hard to look forward when I can't stop regretting what happened in the past.
hunchback
Member
I guess I should have looked at your avatar. Lol. I love the Leafs. I grew up watching Hockey Night in Canada and I remember that team and Edmonton the most.
I'm sorry to hear about your Grandmother. I hope she is doing better. That really sucks that you feel the way you. Have you spoken to a family member that you feel comfortable talking to and explain your feelings? You could suggest that you are really trying to be positive in 2015 and improve your life. Then explain the negative word's hurt you and stall your momentum. My parents were extremely negative and I had to distance myself from that. But it sounds like you really care for your family so you need them to work with you.
I'm not sleeping either. I got 7 hours of sleep from Sunday until yesterday. Do you have health insurance? If you do, you could request a sleep study referral from your primary care physician. You might want to keep a sleep journal for a week also. I'm off to watch the hockey game I recorded. Keep your chin up and throwing jabs bro. Have a great afternoon. I'll talk to ya soon.
Flying Toaster
Member
Don't mean to hi-jack this but my freaking God thank you so much for this link.
Going through a mess of a divorce myself with horrible drama attached to the entire situation. Reading this actually helps a lot.
Holidays are the worst. Honestly though I am looking forward to a new year and getting away from the entire situation in a few months when it is all finalized.
User 479360
Banned
Other family members see it and comment on it, but he's simply bipolar and goes off without warning. I get the brunt of it, but I'm not the only one who gets treated that way.
My family needs me, even if they say they don't, because of health issues and required care.
My Grandmother is fine as well, thank you. The chicken bone or cracker (whatever it was that got lodged in her throat for a bit) scratched it and that's why she could still feel it and was bothered by it.
Healthcare is free in Canada, as it's paid by taxes. So, I have actually done a sleep study (thanks for the suggestion, though). It was over a year ago, and I didn't feel as if I'd slept more than a few minutes, but they got enough data. Apparently I have sleep apnea in my neck, but it only affects me when I'm sleeping on my back, which is rare. So there's nothing they can really do.
I'm seeing a psychiatrist regularly, and am on my fifth antidepressant, but nothing's worked. I slept a lot today, then went out for a bit and now I'm tired again. I want to game, but there are two hockey games on that I don't want to miss.
Leafs vs. Wild and Canada vs. Denmark
I assume you taped the USA vs. Russia World Juniors Game?
Good luck with improving your sleep and health.
I feel ya. I remember telling someone a few years back when they broke up with their girlfriend of 2 years "man, just get over it, you're young."
I was sooooo wrong, doesn't matter how old you are or how it ended, any love-relationship that truly was hurts so bad.
If you ever wanna just chat, PM or whatever. Might help to talk with someone going through the same stuff right now.
Polydeuces
Member
Found out I failed a core class. Didnt get high enough in the exam to pass. This sets me back and my financial aid is cancelled for a year. My parents have enough to pay for another year. Supposedly the exam was directly taken from the enriched version of the class Im taking but my prof tried to make it "easier". With a failing average on the midterm as well it didnt help. Im still on the competitive mindset and its killing me. I get jealous of my friends and others who are doing better than me. Im down to 2 or 3 courses in the upcoming semester which means less work but I wanted at this year to be well. Oh well. I was about to have a mental breakdown but I had this before last year so it wasnt really shocking. But still, it sucks. People try to cheer me up by saying that GPA isnt as important when getting a job but I felt my pride was hurt, again. I mean it just looks bad having another failing mark (thats 4 now)
HolyBaikal
Banned
I could feel... a little better today than I do.
Silphonica
Banned
Those of you on sertraline, have you noticed a darker poop?
ditto.
I think it's working on me. I've been on 50mg for several weeks and will probably be going up to 100 next week after I see my psychiatrist monday morning. The most noticeable effect is the anxiety, I think: when I'm in those moments that used to give me the racing heart and tightness in my chest associated with anxiety, I notice it's just not there anymore. At least most of the time. I've also only had one episode of feeling extremely down on myself in that "Oh wouldn't I just be better off dead" kind of way in a while, which was a month or so ago. I'm glad I'm on it.
Silphonica
Banned
You've been on 50 mg for near enough 2 months right? See thats the thing I went up to 100mg 3 and a half weeks in, im also prescribed to move to 150mg in another 2 weeks. Right now my anxiety is really fucking high, im hoping everything evens out soon. I also have twitchy nerves with this increased anxiety, i can feel a slight buzzing throughout my body frequently, and it makes me more jumpy to things irl.
Dice
Pokémon Parentage Conspiracy Theorist
I took 50mg for anxiety and panic disorder, and it worked completely within 3 weeks. Of course, eventually I felt like a passionless shell, craving absolutely nothing, doing things only because I was supposed to, even stuff like eating and going to the bathroom. I'm not sure if that was because of the medication or because I was jobless for a long time around then.
Anyway, eventually my money dried up so I had to drop it, replaced it with incredibly deliberately balanced lifestyle and buddhist practice, which worked until my job (which I've had the last 2 years) became so batshit insane and reality-denying that it was literally impossible to do it (for anyone) and my anxiety started coming back.
It was weird this time, since my experience with it before and my understanding now showed me how clearly it is an issue with the nervous system, not of attitude or willpower. I'm actually more contented than I have ever been in my life. Anyway, I figured looking for a new job in good health would be better than letting that job wreck me, so I resigned, had my last shift tonight.
Hopefully I get something else set up soon, and the hunt should go better for me this time since I was management, but I have a decent savings and my tax return is going to be quite large if it takes a while. Right now I'm just happy to be out of the delusional madness demanded of you in that place and able to treat life with the responsibility and integrity I know is best. I'll have some time to learn how to use this music production stuff I got, too.
Anyway, eventually my money dried up so I had to drop it, replaced it with incredibly deliberately balanced lifestyle and buddhist practice, which worked until my job (which I've had the last 2 years) became so batshit insane and reality-denying that it was literally impossible to do it (for anyone) and my anxiety started coming back.
It was weird this time, since my experience with it before and my understanding now showed me how clearly it is an issue with the nervous system, not of attitude or willpower. I'm actually more contented than I have ever been in my life. Anyway, I figured looking for a new job in good health would be better than letting that job wreck me, so I resigned, had my last shift tonight.
Hopefully I get something else set up soon, and the hunt should go better for me this time since I was management, but I have a decent savings and my tax return is going to be quite large if it takes a while. Right now I'm just happy to be out of the delusional madness demanded of you in that place and able to treat life with the responsibility and integrity I know is best. I'll have some time to learn how to use this music production stuff I got, too.
A Fish Aficionado
I am going to make it through this year if it kills me
If you're ever having problems with medication, talk to your psychiatrist.
Don't be afraid to ask or try new medication.
Don't be afraid to ask or try new medication.
I was wary of side effects and going into it too fast so I started at a really dose and worked my way up to 50mg after 3-4 weeks or so.
I was worried about this kind of thing happening, "turning me into a zombie" or turning me into a different person or whatever, but I haven't experienced anything like that. Just a decrease in anxiety attacks, fewer lows and an overall lifting of my mood
Dice
Pokémon Parentage Conspiracy Theorist
Well I was unemployed for 3 years, was forced to part ways with my family I grew up in poverty with because we lost the house while I was in Mexico, had my heart crushed from a 5 year relationship so badly that it completely reformatted my views on romance, and I also faded out of the christian faith which I had been a minister in over a decade. I completely changed as a person in views, responses, personality, and ambitions. Not sure what all in there to attribute to circumstances, mental illness, medication for the illness, or plain growing up. Those 3 years were a fuckin weird and grey time for me. So glad to be out into a realistic, stable, and confident place.
Silphonica
Banned
Nah, I'm just going by my doctors recommendation.
The meds affect everyone differently, and it could be from a number of different reason, circumstances included, im sorry to hear you went through that, but im glad you found solutions that help.
I am afraid because I remember how I felt before sertraline and it was really scary.
I am happy. I finally have gotten back to who I was before my cancer. I realize all the things I have to live for. All the different little outlets of happiness I have. All the reasons I enjoy living. I'm in such a healthy place.
But, I'm also not whole. I let my cancer/depression take the most important person from me. And no matter what I try to do, I can't forget them. I can't, get past what I lost. I can't...go a single day, without feeling that absence in my life. In my heart, I know, if I was just given one more shot. Just one more chance. I know, because what we had was special. And the things that pulled us apart, was temporary bullshit. It was me being brought down by a stupid disease, and not being able to see clearly.
I just feel like, I don't belong anywhere. I don't know how to explain the feeling. But I feel like, I have to just leave. I just have to go. I have to take off and disappear. I'm going to continue my life being happy. But I'm going to go. Maybe someday, if my life ever gets back what I lost, maybe I can be in a place where I fee whole and like I belong. But for now, I don't. I've sent out my PS4 and Vita (I shipped them out to the two people that won). I hope it makes them so happy. I just want to make people happy. I want to make people feel loved. All I ever wanted, was to care and love others. I just hope, this person that I lost, can find their way back to me. So I can love and care about them.
But, I'm also not whole. I let my cancer/depression take the most important person from me. And no matter what I try to do, I can't forget them. I can't, get past what I lost. I can't...go a single day, without feeling that absence in my life. In my heart, I know, if I was just given one more shot. Just one more chance. I know, because what we had was special. And the things that pulled us apart, was temporary bullshit. It was me being brought down by a stupid disease, and not being able to see clearly.
I just feel like, I don't belong anywhere. I don't know how to explain the feeling. But I feel like, I have to just leave. I just have to go. I have to take off and disappear. I'm going to continue my life being happy. But I'm going to go. Maybe someday, if my life ever gets back what I lost, maybe I can be in a place where I fee whole and like I belong. But for now, I don't. I've sent out my PS4 and Vita (I shipped them out to the two people that won). I hope it makes them so happy. I just want to make people happy. I want to make people feel loved. All I ever wanted, was to care and love others. I just hope, this person that I lost, can find their way back to me. So I can love and care about them.
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