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[NotTheGuyYouKill]

Whatev, maybe he'll show back up with more confessions next year.

I hope so.

15 in the pipe.

 

[Pharaun]

I actually passed out once after taking a hit to the balls. I remember the hit and then waking up with a ton of people standing over me.



Middle-tier candy bar at best. Call me when you got some Snickers or Peanut Butter Cups.

High Five, peanut butter cups are the best.

 

[Jenny]

I strongly dislike Milky ways and hate 3 musketeers so fight me!

Reeses are the best though! Especially the holiday shapes the pumpkins and eggs have the perfect chocolate to peanut butter ratio.

 

[Magwik]

I strongly dislike Milky ways and hate 3 musketeers so fight me!

Reeses are the best though! Especially the holiday shapes the pumpkins and eggs have the perfect chocolate to peanut butter ratio.

Holiday special Reeses have always tastes weird too me. It's hard to explain but they just taste sort of old

 

[everyday math]

Holiday special Reeses have always tastes weird too me. It's hard to explain but they just taste sort of old

Reeses are the shit. Sex in my mouth.

That racist teacher confession gives shivers in the bad way.

 

[Milksheikhs]

To impregnator,

What happens if one of them has a miscarriage (I hope this doesn't happen)? This would undoubtedly cause a lot of stress and make the one who had a miscarriage feel like total shit 1) for going through a miscarriage but 2) because she then has to see you raise a kid with someone else

Also, I don't think sharing a bed is the greatest idea. What are you going to do when they're both heavily pregnant? It's uncomfortable enough being pregnant and sleeping with your partner in the same bed..I can't even imagine having to sleep with another pregnant woman.

Are you prepared to deal with the hormonal changes and physical aches and pains of both women as they continue through their pregnancy? What about post-partum depression?

If you're prepared to deal with all of this and take responsibility and step up to the plate then more power to you. But I'm not sure you realize the full extent you've gotten yourself into.

 

[CesspoolofHatred]

To impregnator,

What happens if one of them has a miscarriage (I hope this doesn't happen)? This would undoubtedly cause a lot of stress and make the one who had a miscarriage feel like total shit 1) for going through a miscarriage but 2) because she then has to see you raise a kid with someone else

Also, I don't think sharing a bed is the greatest idea. What are you going to do when they're both heavily pregnant? It's uncomfortable enough being pregnant and sleeping with your partner in the same bed..I can't even imagine having to sleep with another pregnant woman.

Are you prepared to deal with the hormonal changes and physical aches and pains of both women as they continue through their pregnancy? What about post-partum depression?

If you're prepared to deal with all of this and take responsibility and step up to the plate then more power to you. But I'm not sure you realize the full extent you've gotten yourself into.

Well I suppose we'll find out how that goes next year.

 

[barik]

But I'm not sure you realize the full extent you've gotten yourself into.

Of course he doesn't, he's a delusional, sexist moron. He's not prepared for any of this, and no way is he going to take full responsibility/good care of two pregnant women and their kids. Dude's gonna be out of there within months. I just feel terrible for the kids, there's no way their upbringing isn't going to be dysfunctional as fuck.

 

[viciouskillersquirrel]

Impregnator's updates take a story that seemed specifically engineered to outrage and crank up the implausibility up to 11. It's like the set up for a bad pregnancy themed porno.

I was prepared to give him the benefit of the doubt until he added in the harem BS.

 

[Milksheikhs]

Of course he doesn't, he's a delusional, sexist moron. He's not prepared for any of this, and no way is he going to take full responsibility/good care of two pregnant women and their kids. Dude's gonna be out of there within months. I just feel terrible for the kids, there's no way their upbringing isn't going to be dysfunctional as fuck.

The particularly cringe worthy parts are the fact that he smiled at his fiance who is trying to make it work and was like "ha now what?"

And the other part where he's like wahhhhh im not gonna be a babysitter wahhh. It's like wow these girls are supporting your ass *seems like he's studying at the moment and they both have full time jobs* and you can't even step up to the plate.

Then the fact that he thinks karma rewarded him. Like loook at me I get tons of pussy 'cause I was honestttt about being dishonest.

Honestly, this dude has nooooot a clue what pregnancy is like or how difficult the whole process is..plus it doesn't end there...you actually have to raise the kid. I think he really believes that because he came in these women..they are now somehow his. Like this is the definition of someone who does not think of long-term consequences.

And yeah I feel bad for the kids.

 

[Dryk]

Well, congrats, you are now on a polyamorous relationship. Try for the threeway for christmas.

If you can call that bastardisation a poly relationship

 

[NotTheGuyYouKill]

Long story short, there's a fetish club that operates in the city I live in but I'm unsure as to whether I should attend. I'm unsure because of the fact that I'm in my 20's and I feel that I'll be the youngest person there by a long shot which makes me feel kind of uncomfortable.

Here's something that the Big Boss, Evilore, said in another thread:

Intentionally leaving your comfort zone behind is an extremely important part of life experience and the expansion of your overall perspective. You intrinsically hate it until it forces you to grow as a person.

Take that piece of advice, think hard on it, then decide. You wanna go to the Fetish Club? Then go. And grow.

 

[NotTheGuyYouKill]

That raining taco song is stuck in my head!

The antidote: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IYQTnicC8ts

 

[NotTheGuyYouKill]

You guys remember the Mother/Daughter guy?

So I saw a few of these people again this week. In the past, the mother has on several occasions sat down next to me really closely, sort of pinning my arm down with hers a little bit, and my leg with her leg. While that felt like her trying to encourage me to make a move, I felt uncomfortable with it with a married woman being so forward in public, so I did nothing. I decided a while back though, that the next time I wouldn't let the opportunity pass, when she did it again I'd make a move. Well, she didn't do that this last time. Maybe I've missed my opportunity with her? I'll have to see how that goes in the future.

I did still try to make a move though, and I don't know why I feel the need to tell all of you this, but her thighs are solid muscle. It's amazing.


I should give a little backgorund as well for the next part:

This woman and her husband are really conservative Christians, the kind that want full on complete control of their kids, with homeschool and everything. The daughter that I'm interested in always seems a little bummed out, disinterested in stuff, and just maybe like she's depressed. That wasn't so this week.


The last time I saw her, she'd cut her hair short. It was disheveled and uneven, so I assumed she'd wanted to do it, been told no by her parents, and then just chopped it off in defiance. This week, it was even shorter, and actually styled. It seems they didn't want her looking like a jerk so took her to a barber. More than that, she had a friend with her, a little butch, also with short hair. When I asked how they know each other, they got weird looks on their faces and started nervously rattling off nearly incomprehensible gibberish. But I've never seen her smile so much, be so animated, or converse so easily with people. I'm thinking the daughter might be a lesbian, but unable to come out.

 

[FloydtheFathead]

Here's something that the Big Boss, Evilore, said in another thread:



Take that piece of advice, think hard on it, then decide. You wanna go to the Fetish Club? Then go. And grow.

Exactly.. and he won't be boring either.

 

[NotTheGuyYouKill]

This is asphyxiaphilia guy again. I thought I'd also confess to a somewhat marginally related matter. For a long time I've wished I had been born female, but unlike what I assume some transgendered individuals feel, I don't have any feeling that I am a woman trapped in a man's body or anything like that. It started when I was young. When I was gaming I would frequently identify more with the female characters if they existed. As more games gave the option, I usually made solely female protagonists. As I mentioned, I don't harbor any feelings that I was meant to be female, and I wonder if maybe this is just some fetishistic obsession. For example, when watching porn, I frequently try to imagine what it would be like to be in the woman's place. I often think that if given the opportunity to be magically transformed into a female, I would take it, but at the same time know that even if I had the resources to do so, I would not find current medical procedures in reassignment to be satisfactory. Is this a strange fixation, or are there others in the same boat?

There's an entire thread dedicated to helping folks in your boat:

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=388670

 

[TheBaldEmperor]

I strongly dislike Milky ways and hate 3 musketeers so fight me!

Reeses are the best though! Especially the holiday shapes the pumpkins and eggs have the perfect chocolate to peanut butter ratio.

I'm with you one the holiday ones. Always look forward to them showing up.

 

[liliththepale]

You guys remember the Mother/Daughter guy?

I'm relieved that you missed your window. It's for the best. Move on. There plenty of fish in the sea that you don't have to start shit to get with.

 

[Admiral Woofington]

yeah sounds like missing your window was the best option. Move on to a healthier relationship that doesn't revolve around destroying a family.

 

[NotTheGuyYouKill]

I'm not sure if I'll post anything else tonight, but if not... here's tonight's final confessions. I needed a pallet cleanser after the last couple of days.

SOULFUCKER.

So let's talk about a character called Nickel. He's a robot. A very human-like robot, in all the humanly practical ways possible.

Like I said, he's one of those shared characters I use across RP groups because of laziness. I made him when I was really, really into Megaman and Metroid. He even has an arm cannon and a laser sword and shit, though he don't have bishounen hair, thank god for that.

He has multiple bodies of himself activated at a time for work and research purposes, like a robot Doc Manhattan.

He also has a dick, because of course he does. But not just any dick, he has a dick that can draw on a sperm bank. But there's not just SPERM in the bank, he can also shoot out honey and water and pretty much any other form of liquid he'd want as long as it fits in a cartridge.

Basically, think a Coca Cola Freestyle machine, but instead it's a dick and it also doesn't have THAT many drink choices. I actually haven't abused the "multiple bodies" thing in a sexual context, shockingly enough, so there haven't been any impromptu mixes of flavor.

And in one RP, RP B, he has a daughter, who for our purposes we'll call "Elysia", she was the most precocious and strangely agile little girl ever who spent large amounts of time bugging everyone she could meet.

Nickel was a terrible father, by the way, but we'll get into that later.

In RP B he also had an evil robot body that had its mind corrupted or some shit, I really can't remember how it happened for the life of me, but important thing is, there was an evil!Nickel. Woo.

And he worked with a guy who had terrible puppet magic and terrorized people and even turned Congress into actual flesh-puppets. WHOO.

So that's all gonna lead to awful things.

So, last time, robots. With dicks.

Robot with a dick eventually found a partner with which to do the dicking and serve as a mother figure to little Elysia. Everything was happy, until one day little Elysia was kidnapped by the puppet-man.

Bunch of people went to save her, big fight, and they eventually get to evil!Nickel.

After a few big, grand evil speeches about strings (I was kind of pretentious and generally shite at writing at the time, for perspective this is around the same time period the plastic soul-Source thing happened), he lets them have the girl, she goes into her daddy's arms, and everyone is happy.

....

Oh wait, no, that's a lie. Evil!Nickel already killed her and turned her into a fleshpuppet and she started strangling her daddy with strings of bloody sinew. He killed a three-year old girl for jollies.

Which, uh.... made a few people very, very angry because I didn't tell them that's where I was going with it. Only, like, the people in charge of the whole thing. And the guy who controlled Elysia's step-mommy.

Anyways, after he laughs at everyone, they beat the bad guy, Elysia's freed from his control, and her body fades away in her mother's arms.

Now, I promised y'all an actual confession after this block, didn't I? Well I actually have two things to confess.

One, I never really planned to keep her permanently dead.

See, at the time, there was a character limit, so I "killed off" the little girl to make room for a new character. But when her body faded away? Her soul actually entered her mommy's body, and got trapped in there for a bit.

This was to essentially keep her in a state of stasis, because at the time there was some talk of expanding the character limit and I pushed for it to be bumped up. If that happened I could bullshit out a way to bring her back, if it didn't she would've probably been trapped forever with nobody else knowing and essentially stay dead. Skirting around the rules and such.

Eventually the character limit did get expanded, everyone else was made aware of her "survival", and did what they could to get her a new body with a little help from a flesh mage. In the process, I pretty much chickened out of a bad ending.

So by just pushing a character onto people, killing her off, and initiating her resurrection, I got a few people in our group pretty engaged. So that's good, right?

Well, that leads into the second thing I wanna confess.

Which is that, well.... I'm kinda torn on the whole thing these days.

I mean, yeah, it got people involved, but looking back at the way I roleplayed then (I have archives of ALL of this, by the way), I.... got a bit TOO excited by how much I horrified folks with the puppetization. Wrote a lot of my stuff to horrify as much as I could, didn't really place much emphasis on character, and I liked fucking with people a lot.

Very, very narcissistic. And I mean, I haven't changed THAT much, otherwise I wouldn't have written anything I've written for these threads.

...But that whole thing, about surprising everyone with a horrifying ending by way of "killing" a little girl just for the sake of horror, and keeping her in stasis while pushing for a rule change?

That was, uh....

All that was kinda manipulative, in my eyes. I ain't too proud of doing that.

And some responses to people.

Manu: That's okay, that's a perfectly natural thought to have. Confusion can be a very good shield!

Switch Back 9: I probably don't have as much structure here as I had last year, which is fine.

Fiction: I think I wrote an incest thing like... once? Probably not canon anymore because UNIVERSE REBOOT, HOORAY

Xamtheking: I've actually wondered whether some of the stuff I've written out would also work as movies, TV shows, even vidya games. 'Course, I have no idea how to produce ANY of those, so I'd probably just keep a writer and director role in this strange, bizarre alternate reality we're speaking of.

Arkos: I actually had a guy who conducted terroristic activities with wood puppet nanobots/magic (depended on the RP), of all things. Just sorta took their will from his victims and made them do very terrible and awful things.

Blooded_Hands: Man, I'd want people to be able to stream that if it happened, but I'm way too X-Rated for Netflix.

maomaolYP: </3

Jackben, Cloyster, Abe Bly, dreamcastmaster: Well I've kept it like this so that people wouldn't know my actual GAF or real life identity, and it's just plain convenient to keep a confession identity because

A. I've been all over the place as a roleplayer and a lot of stuff I write ties back to other things in very convoluted ways, so it's sorta necessary to have it all under a common identity so people have the slightest ability to follow what I send here, and

B. Let's be real here, I would've been given a name anyways, that's just how it works in these topics.

There're peeps who seem to like the way I've been doin' this so far, so I'm personally gonna keep on truckin'. But I do get what you're saying, and it's fine if it's not your thing. Not planning on MAKING people read my stuff, this ain't A Clockwork Orange, I ain't flashin' my stuff in your eyes for conditioning. If ya like it, great. If ya don't, also great.

He sent me proof again as well, but obviously can't post that.

 

[CesspoolofHatred]

All the misery of the past few days, washed away by utter confusion.

 

[NotTheGuyYouKill]

Day 28. Complete.

 

[GrizzNKev]

I just read a hentai where a woman fucks a chimpanzee, then cheats on the chimp with her son. The chimp finds out and the final page depicts the chimp turning on a gas stove and igniting a lighter. Beat that, confessors.

 

[NotTheGuyYouKill]

I just read a hentai where a woman fucks a chimpanzee, then cheats on the chimp with her son. The chimp finds out and the final page depicts the chimp turning on a gas stove and igniting a lighter. Beat that, confessors.

 

[Admiral Woofington]

I just read a hentai where a woman fucks a chimpanzee, then cheats on the chimp with her son. The chimp finds out and the final page depicts the chimp turning on a gas stove and igniting a lighter. Beat that, confessors.

Cheating drives him bananas

 

[B-Dubs]

I needed some SoulFucker after the last few days of confessions, thanks NTGYK.

 

[ExVicis]

Cheating drives him bananas

That pun doesn't have any appeel

 

[Admiral Woofington]

That joke doesn't have any appeal

Sorry. I know it's hard to ask but I had a hard day.

Show me a bit of chimpathy

 

[Orkidea]

Do you have an HD Gif collection or something NTGYK?

 

[NeOak]

Do you have an HD Gif collection or something NTGYK?

He has been preparing since late last year

 

[MCN]

To this confessor: I guess I've got to thank you. At first I genuinely shed tears at this display of utter inhumanity. The more I've dwelled on it though, the more it's lit a fire in me.

I'm in the midst of applying to start teacher training next year. I was already enthused to start, but now I've got this to remember for every single second of my future teaching career. Every single under-achiever, every single problem-child, every single pupil regardless of race, gender or religion is going to get 110% of my effort poured into them because I'm going to be doing it to spite what you've become.

I will never, never be you.

*applauds*

This is the best possible outcome from that confession.

 

[CesspoolofHatred]

*applauds*

This is the best possible outcome from that confession.

Aside from the racist teacher being fired, yeah.

 

[ExVicis]

Sorry. I know it's hard to ask but I had a hard day.

Show me a bit of chimpathy

You're right, I'm sorry. Sit back and relax. Have a few rhesus pieces on me.

 

[ShinRPGamer]

I have my eulogy ready for when the confessions come to a close. I am prepared for the end days.

 

[Cloyster]

I wonder if he is putting them in a certain order, and is saving a good one for last.

 

[Jackben]

Celebrity Soul Confessor you don't need to explain yourself. I've already said my bit, I don't get the appeal of your schizofrenic RP rambling but NTGYK and a few others seem to like it (have you guys ever been to a site called fanfiction.net? It'd be right up your alley) so fair enough.

You guys remember the Mother/Daughter guy?

If this was a Quantic Dream game, this would be the Good ending. Leave that family alone.

 

[NotTheGuyYouKill]

Something for next year:

 

[Trike]

This guy's lucky he wasn't shot.



lol. You got 80K cause you lost your job and apartment, decided that wasn't enough, tried to steal a hundred K, went to jail, and didn't even learn your lesson?

Danny Ocean, you are not.

I just wanna point out how hilariously fake this is, even though it's pretty obvious.

So, confessor:

1. The absolute minimum would have been ten years. Which would be abnormally low, considering that...
2. You made of with an abnormally large amount of money. Twice. The average is less than $10k.
3. You also had been snitched on. Considering they had already had you for both robberies, I don't know what they could have said to get a reduced sentence. The convenience stores? But even that doesn't make sense. Because...
4. Bob is a good guy. Seriously. Fuck you for even suggesting he would snitch on his friend.

 

[Go_Ly_Dow]

I still don't have the mental energy to look into what Soul Fucking actually is.

 

[TheOGB]

Oh boy, I've been waiting for Impregnator III...

Anyway, I called the girl and asked her to meet at my fiancee's house where we're living. She agreed and last Thursday was the day of the meeting. I guess she expected me to tell her something very different (I had problems getting out of her intimate hug), because when I made the proposition of adopting her baby, she got really furious. She threw insults at me, tried to punch me (ironically, just moments ago she had caringly asked where those wounds in my face came from) and eventually got up to leave. That's when she must have seen one of the many photographs around the house. She stood in place, staring at a certain picture and said "that's Jenny" (names changed).

As it turns out, she knew my fiancee.

What

They had both attended the same university (my fiancee is a surgeon, this other girl is an anesthetist) years ago and were friends, but lost contact when they both went to different hospitals. Without pause, she turned to me and demanded that she'd meet with all of us, my fiance included.

Why did you initiate this without her there in the first place?!

Again, my (our's, so I thought) plan was to adopt her baby so that Jenny and me would treat it as our own along with the baby that's in the coming from my fiancee. When I brought up this plan again, the other girl (let's call her Amy) instantly started shouting like she did earlier. To my surprise, Jenny did so, too. I have no idea what's going on in her head, but she instantly said "no way we're treating Amy so poorly!" I have no idea how offering adoption to her, basically leaving her free from all and any responsibility, is "poor treatment" in any way. Yet, here comes my fiancee's plan: We have Jenny move in with us and live as a family of now three, then five. My reaction was very much "wtf" at this point.

My god, it swerved in the exact direction I hoped predicted it would

What followed was some pseudo-reasoning from my fiancee's side, mixed with agreements from Jenny, who is single anyway and would love the idea to rekindle with her previously best friend. Things were going out of hand, so I tried to deflect the whole thing: "So what about sex, Jenny? Are you okay with me having sex with Amy, too? Or what's your plan?". She instantly replied that I'm a swine to even consider the idea, to which I answered that, even if I should okay the whole living-with-Amy plan, I would never be okay with her someday bringing in another guy. This is our home and it's not big enough for two couples. She stared at me violently then turned to Amy. I almost expected this one: Amy said she wouldn't want anyone but the father of her child. I couldn't help but laugh out loud in this moment and smirkingly tell my fiancee: "Ha, see! Now what?" I shouldn't have smiled, because she just looked me in the face and said "okay then". Ugh.

You are kind of an ass for this, but uhh... congrats?

What an intriguing saga that turned out to be. Now I've got a lot more to catch up on.

 

[NotTheGuyYouKill]

Fair warning: this is a very tragic confession.

Before I can get into the confession some backstory is needed. Ten years ago I met my best friend who for the purpose of this confession will refer to her as Emily. Emily was 2 years older then myself and due to constant trouble was held back twice. She also had a secret that she didn't tell me until both of us started highschool. One day while the two of us were walking home from school and heading to my house she looked extremely sad and nervous and told me that she wanted to talk. Once we were there after unpacking and such she broke down as started crying, what then preceded to happen was her coming out as being transgender. Emily is the name I refer to her as in this confession but she was biologically born a he and wanted nothing more to be "reborn" as a real girl. Both me and Emily come from very religious families, she told me once that she tried coming out to her family but was told to be making stuff up so I was the first person she ever came out to, me with a similar background also didn't understand but during that Emily emptied her heart and I began to understand something I never knew existed.

Throughout the rest of freshman year our friendship became much stronger, my house was her safe place. One day I brought her to the mall and asked her what she thought was cute, since she was too embarrassed and didn't think the clerks would understand I calmed her down and told her to pretend to be my "boyfriend" and that she was simply helping pick outfits that she thought would look good at me if they happened to ask. Throughout out that year I also helped her mother to understand Emily's situation and was able to make it so another person was there for her. Her mother tried getting her to counseling but Emily wouldn't have it as she refused to let anyone other then who she could fully trust know about her secret.

Late fall of Sophomore year is where things started to go south. Emily had hid her pain and feelings for so long that almost every day when we were alone she would cry while I hugged her and made her know it was alright. That helped for the year after she came out to me and would make her return to her house happy until we could spend time again but it started to not be enough. She'd return to her house even more depressed then when she visited me. I felt awful as there was nothing I could do I tried making more time for her and cancelled on other friends so I could spend more time with her but after awhile the human inside me appeared and while I still felt so bad and loved her more then any other friend during the start of winter break,a few days before Christmas, I told her that I needed a break and I was sorry.

Christmas day arrived and she texted me asking to come over, I told her sure but that it would have to be quick as I was getting ready to go with my family to my grandmothers house for dinner. I have younger sisters, I only have a mother just like Emily did but my mother didn't have much money. There was a pretty expensive makeup kit I really wanted for Christmas and that morning and due to the limited amount of funds she decided to buy for my sisters and would do something nice for me after the new years as my sisters would be too young to understand so in my extremely petty early teenage years I was upset. Emily arrived about 5 minutes after the text as we lived really close to each other at the time and she was in tears. I invited her to my room and spent 10 minutes trying to console her but once again my uncharacteristic pettiness showed up and I yelled at her, I told her she wasn't the only one sad and that she was making my Christmas even worse then it was. She stormed out of my room and house in tears and went to her house. I immediately felt guilty and awful at what I said and decided that after I got home from my grandmothers I would walk to her house and apologize and give her my present to her.

I got back around 5pm and immediately went to her house. I rang the doorbell but got no answer nor a reply to a text I sent Emily saying I was outside. I texted Emily's mother and was told that she decided to stay behind instead of going with her to her families dinner and there was a key under the mat but that she'd be returning back soon in case I wanted to wait. I used the key and opened the door and saw all the lights were off, I figured Emily must be out that's why there was no answer, I then proceeded to go to her room and to this day I saw the most tragic sight I've ever seen..... Emily had hung herself, I walked in and saw my best friend who I loved more then anything dead in front of my eyes with a face full of sadness, I screamed and threw up immediately, I couldn't move. I kept repeating "it's all my fault" "It's all my fault" Emily's mother arrived just a few minutes after I did and saw me just kneeling there, she called out for me but I didn't respond so she came over and immediately saw what I did and to this day I still remember the scream that she made that night and it just made my cry harder.

Emily's mother briefly regained slight composure enough to dial 911. The cops arrived, ambulances etc.. the cops tried to ask me what happened but I was far too distraught to answer and my mother was called to pick me up. After that I stayed in my room crying, refused to eat, refused to do anything. I couldn't stop blaming myself, If I didn't say those nasty things to her she would still be alive, I felt like I was the one who killed her. My health deteriorated as I refused to eat or drink that my mother dialed 911 to get me admitted to the hospital so I would be forced to get nutrients and such. The 5th day on the night before I was to be discharged Emily's mother visited me in my hospital room. I was too afraid to look at her, I still believed it was my fault Emily was dead, my mother tried to explain the issue so she agreed to talk to me behind those hospital curtains. She told me she didn't blame me for Emily's death, she said that she never saw Emily happier then when I was spending time with her and thanked my for being there for Emily. She told me that she'd be moving away, that staying in this city was too painful and thanked me for everything. Before she left she gave my mother a Christmas present, it was addressed to me along with a note that read my name, it was a gift from Emily to me that she found when she was clearing Emily's closet and that she wanted me to have it before she left.

About an hour after that I asked my mother for some alone time and opened the Christmas present and letter. I read the letter first and to this day I haven't forgotten a single world it read as follows

"Thank you ______ for being my friend, I've never been happier in my life then this last year we spent together, I'm sorry for being a burden on you and I thank you for everything you've done for me, if there is a god then I hope that I'm now somewhere where I have my true body and can finally be truly happy and that we can meet again one day.

Please live your life to the fullest and make sure you smile and be happy every day for me, your a very special girl and you deserve to always be happy

I'll never forget you or your kindness,

Best friends forever, Emily"

I couldn't stop crying after I read that note, it was essentially a suicide note but I managed to have enough courage to take the present and open it. Inside the present was a fancy makeup kit, the exact same makeup kit that I wanted for Christmas, at that moment my heart sank into my gut and I KNEW I was the reason for her death if I wasn't so god damn petty that Christmas morning. I went hysterical and ripped out the IV and tried stabbing myself with the needle, I wanted to die, I believed I had no right to live and that I should have died and not Emily as she did nothing wrong and just wanted to live happily as a real girl. The doctors heard my screams and rushed over in time to stop me, they strapped me down to the bed and had me monitored. After I was released from the hospital my mother had me admitted to a juvenile psychiatric ward, I was too much of a danger to myself. Every night I had the same nightmare, walking in and seeing my best friend dead, hanging there and the face of sadness on her until one night I had a different kind of dream. I saw Emily again, she was happy and she had the proper body that she wanted for so long, she told me to please stop hurting myself and that it wasn't my fault, that I deserved to be happy. I know it sounds cliche but that dream is what started my healing process. I'm a fairly religious person, I have no clue if that dream was real or not or just a figment of my imagination but it did help me heal. I stopped hurting myself, I went to counseling . I lost most of my other friends due to a combination of me cancelling on them to make more time for Emily and my mental state afterwards but I made a couple of new ones who I'm still best friends with to this day. I focused on my studies again and went on to graduate high school last year with honors.

This upcoming Christmas will mark the 4th anniversary of the event and I still have the occasional nightmare seeing her body and I still question whether or not I'm truly to blame for her death but I live on cheery and happy just as she wanted me to so and hopefully putting this confession out there that very few people in my life know hopefully will help me feel even slightly better during this upcoming Christmas season.

I'm glad you're doing better now. I don't think you're to blame.

 

[TheOnlyOneHeEverFeared]

Fuck. Fuck man. I'm so sorry that happened to you confessor, and so sorry Emily felt so bad she did what she did. Fuck.

 

[Arkos]

I still don't have the mental energy to look into what Soul Fucking actually is.

Ehh it's just really weird (or whatever non-judgmental word I should use there, cause you keep doing you Soul Fucker) role playing, ultimately it just seems on the level of a crazy fanfic in its appeal to me. It doesn't do it for me like the "real" confessions either

 

[NeOak]

Fair warning: this is a very tragic confession.




I'm glad you're doing better now. I don't think you're to blame.

That is really sad. Seems like your friend couldn't deal with her depression anymore due to all the things going on. She made her choice though, and you did go above and beyond to help her during a long time.

This reminded me of Robin Williams and his long battle with depression

 

[Hisoka]

Fair warning: this is a very tragic confession.




I'm glad you're doing better now. I don't think you're to blame.

She writes:

"Please live your life to the fullest and make sure you smile and be happy every day for me, your a very special girl and you deserve to always be happy"

And your first idea was hurting yourself???
I'm happy that you're still alive. Just know that she would be pretty pissed at you, for coming too early to that place where she's right now. (She'd be like "you dare to come to me so early? I. TOLD. YOU! *kicks you angrily*)

And no, you're not to blame. You're the only thing that even kept her alive for so long. Without you, she might have been gone long before. I guess she wanted to see you advancing and as soon as she saw herself as a burden (how she stated), she killed herself so you can progress. In her mind, this was a good reaction, so please don't blame her too. Poor soul, there's only so much you can do sometimes, this was really tragic to read. I don't think she wanted you to see her in that moment after she died, that wasn't expected. You seem to be a nice and strong person, so keep it up. Cheer up, you're the reason she even lived to her personal fullest.

 

[Lost Fragment]

Fair warning: this is a very tragic confession.




I'm glad you're doing better now. I don't think you're to blame.

This one is fake I think, but if not, then no, you're not to blame. One person alone, let alone a kid, can't be reasonably expected to shoulder the burden that society puts on such unfortunate people.

 

[Stuart444]

Fair warning: this is a very tragic confession.




I'm glad you're doing better now. I don't think you're to blame.

;_; that is so sad... but I'm glad you're doing better now.

 

[Jazz573]

This one is fake I think, but if not, then no, you're not to blame. One person alone, let alone a kid, can't be reasonably expected to shoulder the burden that society puts on such unfortunate people.

WTF?!

 

[Natiko]

Fair warning: this is a very tragic confession.




I'm glad you're doing better now. I don't think you're to blame.

Well that was depressing. I'm glad you're doing better confessor.

 

[NotTheGuyYouKill]

This one is fake I think, but if not, then no, you're not to blame. One person alone, let alone a kid, can't be reasonably expected to shoulder the burden that society puts on such unfortunate people.

It's not fake. I've spoken to the Confessor briefly over PM about this one.