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Gay and Bisexual relationship thread |OT|

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Lucario said:
i lost most of my friends in the breakup mentioned earlier in this thread, losing more by not being able to think about anything but zack, he refuses to contact me to tell me why he did this, and i'm contemplating suicide.

i need professional help and don't know where to get it. i am very quickly going insane. someone please help me. i thought i could get over him, but i could not.
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These guys can help in an emergency

http://suicidehotlines.com/

Other than that, are you in school? I vaguely remember you being either high school aged or new to college. In any case, if you are in school, they should have counseling services for free or a very modest fee. I've found school counselors more open-minded about gay and kink-related issues, as well (well, college counselors; I've no experience with high school ones).

Other than that, if you have insurance, there should be a number on the back of your insurance card. Call them, and they should be able to set you up with someone in-network.

Other than that... um, stop on by PonyGAF IRC if you want someone to talk to.
 
Lucario, rejection sucks. We've all been there - what your bf did was unbelievably cunty. You know he was in the wrong, everyone here knows it too - there's no need to feel you have to punish yourself for what he did! You may never know why, and that sucks - going by his past actions he sounds like a complete douchebag. But don't do anything stupid - places like this are good cos you can vent it out and talk to people who know what you're going through! Time always makes it better!
 
Lucario said:
i lost most of my friends in the breakup mentioned earlier in this thread, losing more by not being able to think about anything but zack, he refuses to contact me to tell me why he did this, and i'm contemplating suicide.

i need professional help and don't know where to get it. i am very quickly going insane. someone please help me. i thought i could get over him, but i could not.
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A break-up is not worth taking your life over.

I didn't read most of your posts, but is this guy your first boyfriend? Just wallow for the time being--let it sink in. Take about a few days/a week to feel bad about yourself and then get your shit together and realize there are still opportunities out there to be discovered.

You lost most of your friends? Sounds like they weren't really friends to me, then.
 
Lucario I didn't read your previous posts, but please stop yourself from making that decision.

Listen to Ambiguous Cad and contact Suicide Hotlines. Killing yourself over a bad breakup is never the solution. If you lost most of your friends over it then they really aren't your friends. I'm going to echo everyone in the thread here; take some time to yourself to process everything that is happening. It's easier said than done, but you will eventually get over it as time goes by.

You have a life to live out; don't kill yourself over rejection. Take this as a learning experience and come out of it as a stronger person. If it helps, I can PM you my cell phone number if you need anyone to talk to. Please don't do anything dumb.
 
Be proactive and contact said friends. Reach out to them, perhaps your ex has been feeding them lies or something? If they are being recalcitrant and refuse to talk with you or some such, excuse my language but fuck them - not worth the time. You will make awesome friends in the future.

Don't make any rash decisions in the meantime, definitely reach out for professional help.
 
Lucario said:
i lost most of my friends in the breakup mentioned earlier in this thread, losing more by not being able to think about anything but zack, he refuses to contact me to tell me why he did this, and i'm contemplating suicide.

i need professional help and don't know where to get it. i am very quickly going insane. someone please help me. i thought i could get over him, but i could not.
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Omgggggg :(
 
SomeoneCool said:
Yeah that's me :$ but seriously he wasn't staring because he thought we were cute he gave us the we killed his dog look.

Besides that one incident it's been smooth sailing. We still don't have gay marriage here so that's one thing America (well some states) have over Europe (Ireland) when it comes to gay rights.
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You're a black Irishman?!
 
+ Typae posted a picture at the pics-thread! :O!!! *faints* :D
- He's 15! :(

******

And Lucario; try to focus on yourself and other things. Wont' say "forget about him" because is not like you will that easily, but think that you're better than him and the friends that stopped talking to you. So, try to think and do things you haven't done recently or in some time. drawing, music, writing, reading, more games, movies.

Plus by/after E3, we might see this guy pop by..

J0oye.jpg


..in the next Smash game; unless you don't like the character or just got your name from another character. :p

Plus you need to be awesome for PAX! XD
 
TheSeks said:
I'm in and out.
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lol

I've been banging this dude on the regular for about a month and a half now and he's mentioned the idea of us being boyfriends. He seems like a cool guy, but he's almost 40 and I'm 18 >.>

Anyone ever had that big of an age gap for a first relationship?
 
That sort of relationship is inherently unsustainable.
 
Veigar said:
lol

I've been banging this dude on the regular for about a month and a half now and he's mentioned the idea of us being boyfriends. He seems like a cool guy, but he's almost 40 and I'm 18 >.>

Anyone ever had that big of an age gap for a first relationship?
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no but who cares? try it :)
 
Veigar said:
lol

I've been banging this dude on the regular for about a month and a half now and he's mentioned the idea of us being boyfriends. He seems like a cool guy, but he's almost 40 and I'm 18 >.>

Anyone ever had that big of an age gap for a first relationship?
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Uh, didn't you say you are a freshman in college? Might want to play that field first

UTSA right? do you go to The Saint? or the strip?
 
Veigar said:
lol

I've been banging this dude on the regular for about a month and a half now and he's mentioned the idea of us being boyfriends. He seems like a cool guy, but he's almost 40 and I'm 18 >.>

Anyone ever had that big of an age gap for a first relationship?
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If you really wanna try it,go for it. Who cares.
 
Rez said:
That sort of relationship is inherently unsustainable.
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The age gap? Not necessarily. But the, "My regular fuck buddy brought up the idea of a relationship. I don't know about it, but he seems nice," is sending signals that you might not actually want to be in a relationship with this guy. You just want to keep him on as a fuck buddy. And you can call each other "boyfriend," "partner" or whatever else you can think of, but using this guy just for sex does not a relationship make.

If you really do want to try it out with this guy, Veigar, take it slow. Maybe go on a coffee date first to find out, um, if you're comfortable with the whole thing. And please don't get into something just because it's convenient, get into something when/if it feels right.
 
Yep, agree with lenovox1.
Why not take things slowly first, go out on dates, talk, dinner and see how things work out; rather than just say "yes" to the question.
 
Veigar said:
lol

I've been banging this dude on the regular for about a month and a half now and he's mentioned the idea of us being boyfriends. He seems like a cool guy, but he's almost 40 and I'm 18 >.>

Anyone ever had that big of an age gap for a first relationship?
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I would advise against it.
 
Veigar said:
lol

I've been banging this dude on the regular for about a month and a half now and he's mentioned the idea of us being boyfriends. He seems like a cool guy, but he's almost 40 and I'm 18 >.>

Anyone ever had that big of an age gap for a first relationship?
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Do it! Is he rich? Maybe he'll buy you tons of stuff!
 
Met a cute guy and found out he's a flight attendant. He told me he'd love to take me for a first class ride on his plane...oh shit!!


Lucario, please hang in there :( I've known someone that has committed suicide and it hurts a lot of people...he had so many options and he chose the wrong one.
 
Lucario said:
i lost most of my friends in the breakup mentioned earlier in this thread, losing more by not being able to think about anything but zack, he refuses to contact me to tell me why he did this, and i'm contemplating suicide.
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I can't help you, but please, do not even consider suicide. A break up, even the worst one, is not worth taking away your life. Don't blame yourself, if anything blame him for ending the relationship and not even telling you why.

Sadetar said:
But I think it is true that in Europe being homosexual or bisexual isn't really that big of a deal.
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It really depends where in Europe. Sadly, Poland is still a really divided place when it comes to LGBT. On one hand we are a progressive country and there are even love parades organized each year, on the other hand, every time such a parade is organized it's organization is always preceded with lots of problems and counter-parades organized by conservatives. And even though we have an open gay activist and a transsexual women in Lower House nowadays, they aren't treated that well even by other members of parliament. The other day a right-winger parliamentarian openly "joked" about bestiality when the gay guy said that we should "treat animals like partners", and another parliamentarian kept calling the transsexual women per "he", or "mister" in an argument. None of them were penalized. :/

And I really doubt a gay couple (males) could walk down the street holding hands and not being beaten up by thugs or at least made fun of.

BTW. Your red hair look amazing :D.
 
Veigar said:
lol

I've been banging this dude on the regular for about a month and a half now and he's mentioned the idea of us being boyfriends. He seems like a cool guy, but he's almost 40 and I'm 18 >.>

Anyone ever had that big of an age gap for a first relationship?
Click to expand...
I tend to skew older myself. When I was 15/16 my boyfriend at the time was 28. We had a nice on and off relationship and ended up moving in together for a while until he moved out of state for work.

So I wouldn't necessarily advise against it as long as you both like each other and get along.
 
Lucario said:
i lost most of my friends in the breakup mentioned earlier in this thread, losing more by not being able to think about anything but zack, he refuses to contact me to tell me why he did this, and i'm contemplating suicide.

i need professional help and don't know where to get it. i am very quickly going insane. someone please help me. i thought i could get over him, but i could not.
Click to expand...

Well if you realise you need professional help it means you still haven't lost your mind completely, then go and get that help.
Friends are very very much replaceable.
 
ciD_Vain said:
Met a cute guy and found out he's a flight attendant. He told me he'd love to take me for a first class ride on his plane...oh shit!!
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I've seen the odd past hookup on the Perth to Brisbane root route. Flight attendants are whores. Total generalisation.
 
Rez said:
People get into relationships expecting them to end?
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Never understood that either. Two of my closest friends were dating each other. It lasted for 5 years and quite long before the breakup I would usually ask them how did they see each other in the future. They always said not married. Wut? As in, not living together. I don't really get that mentality, life's too short to waste it on projects that you already don't have hope in.
 
Sofo said:
Never understood that either. Two of my closest friends were dating each other. It lasted for 5 years and quite long before the breakup I would usually ask them how did they see each other in the future. They always said not married. Wut? As in, not living together. I don't really get that mentality, life's too short to waste it on projects that you already don't have hope in.
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Sometimes you just want someone there for you, even if you don't feel like you would be able to spend your life with them. It's understandable if it's a mutual feeling, although I'd like to think I'd never continue a relationship like that for five years.

Also, some people just hate talking about marriage until the relationship has been going on for multiple years. It freaks partners out, and sometimes the couple will just avoid talking about it to avoid the awkwardness. This is why you see couples who have been together for a decade, are living together, and are not married for whatever reason. The idea of being.... effectively under a fucking contract to stay with someone the rest of your life is TERRIFYING. No matter how much you love them.
 
GothPunk said:
Oh no, he's 100% British, I just stole him and moved him in with me here in Dublin.

Damn those sexy Brits! :P

There are plenty of black Irish people though, dunno why that would be surprising.
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Strangely enough, there exist people who have yet to play Team Fortress 2.

Black Scottish Cyclops. Technicality.
 
Lucario said:
Sometimes you just want someone there for you, even if you don't feel like you would be able to spend your life with them. It's understandable if it's a mutual feeling, although I'd like to think I'd never continue a relationship like that for five years.

Also, some people just hate talking about marriage until the relationship has been going on for multiple years. It freaks partners out, and sometimes the couple will just avoid talking about it to avoid the awkwardness. This is why you see couples who have been together for a decade, are living together, and are not married for whatever reason. The idea of being.... effectively under a fucking contract to stay with someone the rest of your life is TERRIFYING. No matter how much you love them.
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Well, I was wrong saying I don't understand it, it's just not my thing. My partner and I have been on a long distance and time relationship now, and due to the distance we always said to talk about things just the way we feel them, without fear of what the other will think. I think that's good and more people should be open with their partner. After all, you're sharing so much already, sharing with him your illusions and hopes in the future and (hopefully) seeing how they match is something really pretty.

Like I've said, my friends also had some other issues but I still think that at least if you spend a 8 months to a year with someone, you should start thinking of yourselves as a couple and if there is plans for the future. Not saying you have to decide on the name of your first infant but at least not be scared of talking about future arrangements.
 
GothPunk said:
Oh no, he's 100% British, I just stole him and moved him in with me here in Dublin.

Damn those sexy Brits! :P

There are plenty of black Irish people though, dunno why that would be surprising.
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Because I'm completely ignorant about Ireland, and a black Irishman doesn't fit into the stereotype. I mean I knew black Irish people existed, but it would have been another thing to see/talk to one.

Sofo said:
Never understood that either. Two of my closest friends were dating each other. It lasted for 5 years and quite long before the breakup I would usually ask them how did they see each other in the future. They always said not married. Wut? As in, not living together. I don't really get that mentality, life's too short to waste it on projects that you already don't have hope in.
Click to expand...

Not everyone's end goal is marriage.

ciD_Vain said:
Met a cute guy and found out he's a flight attendant. He told me he'd love to take me for a first class ride on his plane...oh shit!!
Click to expand...

You lucky dog. How do you keep meeting these people?
 
Not that I have a problem with age gap, but I do believe most people will have difficulty in finding common ground to sustain such a relationship, 22 years is really close to a generation difference. Not to mention the association seems to be purely based on sex. No offense intended Veigar, but 18 is also a bit young to be committing in a relationship that would require a lot more effort than your average one.

julls said:
Flight attendants are whores. Total generalisation.
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I don't think you're entirely wrong. By nature of their job flight attendants probably have hook ups more often than the rest of us. Is it so farfetched if they have regulars they see in the cities they travel the most to? :P
 
Mystic Theurge said:
Because I'm completely ignorant about Ireland, and a black Irishman doesn't fit into the stereotype. I mean I knew black Irish people existed, but it would have been another thing to see/talk to one.
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I get what you mean, it's one thing to be aware of something or someone existing and another thing altogether when you're actually talking to someone who 'fits the bill'.

Which, as it happens, is one of the things I love about GayGaf - the fact that we're able to get to know people from the other side of the world.

Hey, maybe between the two of us we can teach you all a bit about Ireland. ;)
 
Mystic Theurge said:
If he dies mysteriously...
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There's nothing mysterious about him falling down the stairs because I showgirl'd him.

Also I dunno, I think pren-ups also are used in will disputes? I'm never getting married so what the hell do I know. Just make sure his fortune is able to be yours.
 
It's not so much the age difference than where you are in life that makes me not understand when an 18yo dates a 40yo.

College tremendously change people and the first few years if working do that too. When I think of myself at 18, 21 and 25 I do not see the same person. I was in such a different place everytime that it boggles my mind when I see a 28 yo with a 15 yo.

Once you start your professional life, age don't matter as much.

Most of the guys I've talked to who are undergrads (I'm in grad school) are so young, mentally and physically. Even people in grad school who went there straight from undergrad feel like kids to me.

Which is why a 40yo man with a 18yo makes me suspicious. But whatever works for people.
 
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