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Gay and Bisexual relationship thread |OT|

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Replicant said:
I have no idea and I really don't want to know at this point in my life. I think as long as he identifies himself as straight guy, there's no point for me to wonder whether or not he had feelings for me.
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I so get where you're coming from. I was in a similar situation with a guy before in Uni. We were in constant communication, had flirty conversations over text and over the phone. But we never really got around to really dating. It's quite similar with the thing with your gym buddy because eventhough I had a pretty good idea he was into guys, I'd hear him/hear of him saying outright he's straight and that he's into girls.

It was really frustrating, and gave me undue stress. There I was looking forward to getting more serious with him, but yes, like you said, there was really no point to wonder if we were getting anywhere, because apparently, he was straight. Rewinding everything in my head is just stressful, so I get you when you say there is really no point.

:D There you go! So most of us were right in guessing that it was the directness that caught him off guard. So unless you're in a gay bar/environment, next time it's safer to not approach a guy directly like that. What are you going to do now? Just to be safe though, don't put too much hope/effort on this guy unless he starts approaching you more often.
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Yes, yes. That's what I'm thinking as well. Well I'm probably seeing him around in the gym tomorrow. I noticed he's usually there mornings on Tuesday. I guess I'll acknowledge him with a smile when I pass by him? And maybe restrain myself from approaching him again and striking up a conversation.

I mean, like you said before, the ball's in his court, I've made my intention pretty clear. So if he wants anything to do with me, he'll approach me knowing I would reciprocate. If not -- oh well. Move on to the next gym dude, haha!

I'm only a little bothered that apparently I have no clue how to approach gay dudes "properly." Hah!
 
Sagitario said:
Look on the bright side, at least you have gay dudes to "properly" and "improperly" approach :P
You will learn eventually.
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I hope so. I guess it helps that my workplace is full of them. (I work in news at a TV station; the "creative" dudes from other divisions are so easy to spot!)

Scott, really? Maybe you're not doing "the look" long enough to signal interest?

When I see a guy I find cute, I try to make eye contact. When they sustain it for more than 2 seconds, that usually means there's a chance he might be gay. And then I take it from there -- but then, with my latest mishap, I still have much learn on how to go forwards.

Or maybe YOU should try approaching them?
 
Larson Conway said:
When I see a guy I find cute, I try to make eye contact. When they sustain it for more than 2 seconds, that usually means there's a chance he might be gay. And then I take it from there -- but then, with my latest mishap, I still have much learn on how to go forwards.
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This is anecdotal at best, but I've found that the duration of eye contact has been a poor indicator of orientation. If anything, I've noticed that straight guys are less likely to feel shy/self-conscious while making eye contact with another man, tending to sustain it longer. I thought I could rely on the eye contact test until noticing that. Misleading, these men are. :(
 
I will never look at Cheezy's avatar the same way again.

Necromanti said:
This is anecdotal at best, but I've found that the duration of eye contact has been a poor indicator of orientation. If anything, I've noticed that straight guys are less likely to feel shy/self-conscious while making eye contact with another man, tending to sustain it longer. I thought I could rely on the eye contact test until noticing that. Misleading, these men are. :(
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This is quite true in my experience. I've noticed guys, who I'm going to assume are gay or are at least checking me out, divert their eyes away the moment I return eye contact. I think many gayboys are afraid of getting caught in the act.

Personally I'll stare at a fine ass on the street but if there happened to be a group of chavs around I probably wouldn't.
 
MidnightScott said:
Ugh I wish cute guys would approach me. Should I act more gay than I usually do or will that turn them off? lol
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But don't you have a relationship project going on? I just don't get it, did I miss something or you guys will be a sort of open relationship or what?

And just be yourself, please.
 
Sofo said:
But don't you have a relationship project going on? I just don't get it, did I miss something or you guys will be a sort of open relationship or what?

And just be yourself, please.
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That ship has sailed iirc.


I never do the eye thing and I am certainly the kind of guy to divert my eyes as soon as the cute guy I've been starring at looks at me so I guess you're right!
This whole sustained stare thing reminds me if how gays used to cruise 20years ago: if you look at me for more than 4 secs then let's go behind that tree and fuck (I do realize how stupid that sounds, ha).

Anyway, last Saturday I was enjoying a drink with my fellow volleyball gays and was informed that most people on an opposite team think I'm hot. Shallow as I am, instead of feeling a bit awkward since half that team was talking to me at that very moment and all were looking at me with that drunken I'd-fuck-you-right-now look, I then proceded to show off my 3.5 abs. I did not go home with any if them but it felt good to get some attention especially after the last guy I was dated started ignoring my messages after almost 2 months of dating.
Rejection y'all, never pleasant!

I also randomly met a gaygaffer there, hiya buddy :)
 
SpaceBridge said:
How long has it been since you've been in the thread?
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About a year, I'd say... Probably a little over a year. Last time I posted, I talked about meeting my 13 year senior boyfriend and if that was a weird thing or not, and found out loads of guys here date older men as well. For the record, he's 38 and I'm 25, and we're still together :3 Considering how long it took for me to come out to myself and my family (just a short 24 years or so), I've gotten quite comfortable with being gay and wouldn't take it any other way. People still ask me, "do you like being gay?" I just ask them the same question about being straight, and then the start to get it. Considering I don't know even know what it feels like to have (true) heterosexual feelings, I really can't imagine my life any different and I'm horrendously proud of being a homosexual.

As for the eye contact thing, never judge a guy on that unless you're at a bar or some such place, really. Straight guys will stare longer to really judge your merit as a man and as a person. If you shy away, you'll seem less confident, etc, and that'll turn off guys from being friends with you. You can almost always tell a gay if he looks away as soon as you look. Gays will look away due to being afraid to offend a straight man for staring (how do I know? That's exactly what I do!), so you'll have to find stronger clues elsewhere, such as if he looks at you multiple times, etc.
 
Yaceka said:
Alright folks, I finally set up the Mario Kart 7 GayGAF Community.

Quote this post to reveal the community code!


I'm thinking of having a weekly get together for everyone to race, but I'm gonna wait a few days to find out what's good for everyone. The temporary race time will be every Wednesday at 9pm PST/8pm CST/6pm EST. Of course anyone can go on and race whenever but there'll probably be no one there unless you set something up.

Any input would be nice. Hopefully I'll be seeing people this Wednesday. :)
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I'm in for this, although 9PM PST is like 5 AM Spain time, so I'll check the channel eventually to see if there is any race to join (I doubt it).
 
Hmm, I'm actually a bit surprised the 3 second look apparently doesn't work well for most. In my experience, straight guys immediately avert their sight elsewhere to avoid man-to-man eye contact. And not to be too defensive, the idea that getting another gay guy's attention through that doesn't necessarily mean, "hey come, let's fuck." Personally, it's my way of gauging whether a cute stranger (yes, I only ever use it with guys who I don't know may be gay already) would be someone I can approach with intentions. Say, if it's at a non-exclusive-for-gays bar, at least I have an idea after a couple more sustained eye contact(s).
 
krypt0nian said:
This is going to sound crazy but has anyone else found pictures of guys that you've had sex with in the past on tumblr porn sites?

Or it is just me? Because its kinda freaking me out.

It's only three guys but WTF?
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Oh man, now you've got to share! (Sorry, needed to catch up on the thread!)

Btw, Barcelona gaffer here.
 
Lucario said:
and secretly enjoyed. That dick is kind of a square, though. Shit is freaky.
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I think it's the angle at which it's drawn, the foreshortening makes it looks shorter and thicker. I always have to admire the artistry of such works... even if it doesn't do much for me.

Oh and I should have posted before, I live in Dublin, Ireland and thus I have the American gay gaffers on one side and the European gay gaffers on the other, like some international sexy sandwich, whilst Aussie-gaf wanders like a forgotten satellite on the outskirts of our fun.
 
Sofo said:
What is this dick everyone is talking about? '-'
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Ask Cheezy to see the full picture that his avatar comes from. Just prepare yourself for anthropomorphic fox/dog guy dick. :P (Replete with precum and sextoys).

...Jesus, the things Cheezy was linking last night on TC. XD
 
GothPunk said:
Ask Cheezy to see the full picture that his avatar comes from. Just prepare yourself for anthropomorphic fox/dog guy dick. :P (Replete with precum and sextoys).

...Jesus, the things Cheezy was linking last night on TC. XD
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Ah, ok! I don't hate on anthro stuff but it's not really my thing, gonna pass. :3 Thanks though!
 
Lingering eye contact still works in my area (both out here in the country and in ATL). Then again i've gotten to the point where if i'm interested I have no problem being a little forward if I have to. Ain't got time to beat around the bush.

Changed my profile pic on B411, the weirdos and hook up attempts came out of the woodwork something fierce. It turns out he was later joking but
one guy went on for a whole night about how he wanted me to pour hersheys in my ass and spray his face

My response:
"Sorry brah I only do Nestle"

Tee Hee. He stopped after that.

My guy's birthday is wednesday. What to do, what to do...
 
Necromanti said:
This is anecdotal at best, but I've found that the duration of eye contact has been a poor indicator of orientation. If anything, I've noticed that straight guys are less likely to feel shy/self-conscious while making eye contact with another man, tending to sustain it longer. I thought I could rely on the eye contact test until noticing that. Misleading, these men are. :(
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As has already been mentioned, looking and then quickly looking away indicates sexual interest. That's about as much of a fact as you can put on human behavior. Prolonged eye contact can usually make the other person think there's something wrong with them. But it would really depend on how Larson Conway looks. ETA: Or, like he mentioned, where. In a bar setting, prolonged eye-to-eye contact would definitely mean that both of you are interested.
 
Why dont some you go and meet gay guys at gay places instead of playing this frustrating and stressing game of eye contact and nods at gyms, buses and work. I know some of you have an obsession over straight guys, but it's the wrong tree to be barking up.
 
fly high ~ayunite~ said:
Any gays here in the military or have served? Thinking about signing up for the Royal Air Force when my teaching contract finishes in July. Curious to hear your experiences..
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I was in the US army many moons ago. Way back in the 90's, it was a good time, but I wouldn't do it again now. I was infantry though, probably quite different to the RAF.

Yoshiya said:
The end of the world.
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New Zealand?
 
Sagitario said:
The amount of Facebook status update drama, backstabbing, bipolarity, Skype chat logs, spilled tea and screams for attention will go through the roof!
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ZoHjL.gif
 
Oh man, I wish there was a Gay-GAF Wikipedia so I could read all the drama.

It's Tuesday
Friday!
so that means MOAR work, but I'm enjoying it lately. I've been feeling it's pointless, since anyway I'll be living in Norway, but I can't let that affect my performance. It motivates me to see my partner working hard (and he calls himself lazy, lol) as well as a friend of mine.

Anyway, this post is kinda erratic but just wanted to kinda voice out myself. Have a good g/day!
 
Hi I'm new to this thread :) I haven't come out to anyone yet but I've recently thought a lot about love and not just sex like I usually do. I don't know why I have this feeling. It's really making me feel lonely and depressed and all. I'm just scared of my future mainly because I'm scared to come out.
 
trimon said:
Hi I'm new to this thread :) I haven't come out to anyone yet but I've recently thought a lot about love and not just sex like I usually do. I don't know why I have this feeling. It's really making me feel lonely and depressed and all. I'm just scared of my future mainly because I'm scared to come out.
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Well it depends on how old you are and where you live but in almost every case its best to just come out.. If nobody even knows you're gay, how can you ever get a boyfriend?
 
trimon said:
Hi I'm new to this thread :) I haven't come out to anyone yet but I've recently thought a lot about love and not just sex like I usually do. I don't know why I have this feeling. It's really making me feel lonely and depressed and all. I'm just scared of my future mainly because I'm scared to come out.
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You sound young. Don't worry, we've all been there. I remember that the first time I admitted to myself that I was gay, voicing it out not just thinking about it, I got a bit dizzy. It's good that you're thinking about love but remember that first you need to come to terms with yourself, before you're ready to love and be loved. That'll come with time and there's no need to rush it.

Is your family understanding? Religious friends? If answer to that is yes or no, it doesn't matter, because they will love you no matter what. That being said, don't rush things out and give them some time to adjust to changes (if you do come out).

Coming out might be scary, but it is also very refreshing, and you'll see it makes you feel better about yourself. Don't be depressed or lonely, because there's many people in your situation or maybe even worse than yours. Be happy and embrace yourself!
 
trimon said:
Hi I'm new to this thread :) I haven't come out to anyone yet but I've recently thought a lot about love and not just sex like I usually do. I don't know why I have this feeling. It's really making me feel lonely and depressed and all. I'm just scared of my future mainly because I'm scared to come out.
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The best thing to do is come.out. I know its scary, but the relief you'll feel will be the most liberating thing ever. Start with close friends.
 
Thanks! I haven't really developed any close friends. I have a couple of brothers and sister and closer to them and they've suspected but still don't know. Been hiding it for a long time. My dad's religious and my mom is real old fashioned. I might just be overthinking it but I really have no clue how they'd react. I thought awhile ago that I wouldn't ever need to come out and just move far away from the family. I'm thinking of letting my sister know first. And she started all this anyway when she asked me last week for some reason. Made me feel all depressed

I just really want a loving relationship with a special someone. Always thought I'd just have sex with as many people as I can.
 
trimon said:
Thanks! I haven't really developed any close friends. I have a couple of brothers and sister and closer to them and they've suspected but still don't know. Been hiding it for a long time. My dad's religious and my mom is real old fashioned. I might just be overthinking it but I really have no clue how they'd react. I thought awhile ago that I wouldn't ever need to come out and just move far away from the family.

I just really want a loving relationship with a special someone. Always thought I'd just have sex with as many people as I can.
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How old are you? Don't make this more than it is, saying you're gay won't suddenly mean you're having lots of sex and/or find yourself in an amazing relationship. Most of the time, coming out to everyone with a theoretical sexuality isn't worth the time or effort. Work on friends first, or you really won't be meeting anyone.

Don't make your life harder than it need be.
 
trimon said:
I'm 25. I've fooled around with a few guys before but, nothing serious.
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Older than I guessed based on your first post (no offence). Except if you're living out of home I wouldn't let it bother you, I don't see what the false demarcation of "out" and not has much to do with how you live your life. That is, of course, unless you have overbearing parents breathing down your neck, but in that case your problems are wider than this personal technicality.

Edit: Oops, omitted a crucial word: except.
 
Yeah they breathe down my neck. Well thanks for the help. I'll start with making more friends. I guess it'll be a lot easier for me than going man-hunting
 
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