I would modify this slightly to account for a wider range of girls - Only open up to a girl to the extent that she has opened up with you. Some girls appreciate honesty, sensitivity, and candor, and letting her lead the way (and not following too far behind) will make her feel comfortable in opening up more in the future because it's a positive response and shows that you're listening.
Dating-Age |OT3| Positivity, Confidence, and Not Being a "Nice" Guy
- Thread starter soultron
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I would modify this slightly to account for a wider range of girls - Only open up to a girl to the extent that she has opened up with you. Some girls appreciate honesty, sensitivity, and candor, and letting her lead the way (and not following too far behind) will make her feel comfortable in opening up more in the future because it's a positive response and shows that you're listening.
I turned down sex with a 10 because it didn't feel right either. That just means you aren't a star on Jersey Shore.
Attackthebase
Member
Eh. I've turned down multiple opportunities for sex in the past. If you don't feel like it, then it's nothing to sweat about. Hell, if I wanted to, I could have gotten laid last night, but I chose not to.
I've now realized that alcohol is my penis kryptonite...I fooled around with a girl a few months ago, but I wasn't hard enough to seal the deal. Last night, I didn't think I was that drunk, but it happened again with a different girl. She was really cool about it and I took care of her in other ways, but now I'm convinced that I need to keep off the stuff when I'm anticipating having a girl in bed. Grrrr...
Smelly Tramp
Member
ugh so annoying, she wanted to chat with me today. i said no, i just wanted my money back.
she said why should she give me the money back when i'm being such a dickhead?
i said i'm not, i told her to seperate her emotions from logic, and said if she owed a friend a money, she'd give it them back.
then she said she's not giving it back because i won't chat with her. she's being so unreasonable and immature. she also said she was looking forward to seeing me again after this was all over.
fuck her, i just got my balls back and i'm not bowing down to her every whim.
she said why should she give me the money back when i'm being such a dickhead?
i said i'm not, i told her to seperate her emotions from logic, and said if she owed a friend a money, she'd give it them back.
then she said she's not giving it back because i won't chat with her. she's being so unreasonable and immature. she also said she was looking forward to seeing me again after this was all over.
fuck her, i just got my balls back and i'm not bowing down to her every whim.
Well if you allow them to descend low enough, you chat her up and be as much of a sweetie as you have to be to get your cash back, then cut off all communication afterwards and she'll realize she's been had.
If that doesn't work within a month, take her to court.
electricshake
Member
Glad I didn't go through with it, one night stands aren't my thing so I probably would've regretted it in the morning. Still, was a much-needed confidence boost, and I managed to kiss three guys in one night which is a record for me! It's been a while since I've had any random action like that so it was a pretty successful night.
That's balls for you?
A self-respecting person, regardless of genitalia, would say, "You should give me my money back because it's mine and if you don't I'll take you to small claims court." Then add a smiley face a little ways down (or a few seconds later via text).
Why is this hard?
Smelly Tramp
Member
Because it's not enough money to go to a small claims court, it's only 23 quid. It's an ebay fee because i sold a phone for her on my account. There is no evidence the phone was ever hers and therefore i don't have a leg to stand on.
I just wanted it back because I've just finished my university degree, my loan is gone, and i have nothing. But i realise i can't get it back now, whenever i bring it up (after she initiates conversation) she tells me about the time i got so fucked up on drugs i couldn't even stand up and she had to take care of me. But so what? that was 5 months ago, and it's completely irrelevant. There is zero logic to it. But yeh, she's beyond reasoning with now.
Rubbish King
The gift that keeps on giving
Never thought id end up posting here GAF but i got a problem..
haven't really been dating in over a year and a half, got pwned right in the heart last time and so i kinda took a break, i haven't liked a girl since then, there have been a few drunken one night stands but noting major.
Within the last month i have met two really nice girls, i like both of them a lot...so how far do you go before you have to make the decision, and how do you do that? and how do you pick?
A short description of the two:
Girl A: She's funny, cute and likes gaming, we're really similar and she's down to earth which i really like
When we talk the conversation is never dull, i feel like it could be great because we're really good friends already the only hitch is I'm pretty musical and its kinda my passion and she isn't really big on it, i mean she likes it but she doesn't have the best taste, its not a biggie but i considered it relevant.
Girl B: Much more of a girly girl , we also have loads in common but on the artistic side, she's a lot more ambitious and has a bit more of a wild side, the thing i like about her is she has her own opinions and always puts me in my place if i speak out of turn
The thing is she's a lot more experienced in the relationship department and I'm pretty new to it, which kinda scares me
So yeah any advice would be great because I'm really stumped.
haven't really been dating in over a year and a half, got pwned right in the heart last time and so i kinda took a break, i haven't liked a girl since then, there have been a few drunken one night stands but noting major.
Within the last month i have met two really nice girls, i like both of them a lot...so how far do you go before you have to make the decision, and how do you do that? and how do you pick?
A short description of the two:
Girl A: She's funny, cute and likes gaming, we're really similar and she's down to earth which i really like
When we talk the conversation is never dull, i feel like it could be great because we're really good friends already the only hitch is I'm pretty musical and its kinda my passion and she isn't really big on it, i mean she likes it but she doesn't have the best taste, its not a biggie but i considered it relevant. Girl B: Much more of a girly girl , we also have loads in common but on the artistic side, she's a lot more ambitious and has a bit more of a wild side, the thing i like about her is she has her own opinions and always puts me in my place if i speak out of turn
The thing is she's a lot more experienced in the relationship department and I'm pretty new to it, which kinda scares me So yeah any advice would be great because I'm really stumped.
Smelly Tramp
Member
A short description of the two:
Girl A: She's funny, cute and likes gaming, we're really similar and she's down to earth which i really like
Girl B: Much more of a girly girl , we also have loads in common but on the artistic side, she's a lot more ambitious and has a bit more of a wild side, the thing i like about her is she has her own opinions and always puts me in my place if i speak out of turn
So yeah any advice would be great because I'm really stumped.
sounds like girl A would be the safe bet. probably get a few good years of a relationship out of her till you get bored of her.
girl b is not such a safe bet, probably a right handful. but she seems like she has a personality and doesn't just agree with the bullshit everyone spouts. a defining characteristic in a person. probably more of a risk but if you're willing to take it, it could end up great. just make sure she's not a party girl, party girl's always cheat.
Z
ZombieFred
Unconfirmed Member
Never thought id end up posting here GAF but i got a problem..
haven't really been dating in over a year and a half, got pwned right in the heart last time and so i kinda took a break, i haven't liked a girl since then, there have been a few drunken one night stands but noting major.
Within the last month i have met two really nice girls, i like both of them a lot...so how far do you go before you have to make the decision, and how do you do that? and how do you pick?
A short description of the two:
Girl A: She's funny, cute and likes gaming, we're really similar and she's down to earth which i really like
Girl B: Much more of a girly girl , we also have loads in common but on the artistic side, she's a lot more ambitious and has a bit more of a wild side, the thing i like about her is she has her own opinions and always puts me in my place if i speak out of turn
So yeah any advice would be great because I'm really stumped.
Sounds like you're afraid of picking the "wrong" one out of two girls you're into. Why not ask them first if they are into you and potentially would like to go on a date (So you know for certain). Try to do that when you're about to head home or go somewhere else so you can leave it open and then arrange a date with the two girls on two separate times so you can find out with your heart on what girl you really like more and to see if they have the same feelings. There's no harm in dating them at a similar time.
Rubbish King
The gift that keeps on giving
This is what i thought, but i haven't really been in a serious relationship that has lasted that long, so i don't know if i would get bored or not if that makes sense?
She's not, and this is what i thought...
Sounds like good advice, my only reserve is that i don't want to date them both and have really good times with both, making it harder to decide...couldnt it make it more complicated?
Z
ZombieFred
Unconfirmed Member
Not really as when you get to find out more from both of them you will go with what who you like "more" than the other person. It won't get that much complicated if you can keep the two separate so they don't come across each other.
Rubbish King
The gift that keeps on giving
This sounds like it could turn into a romantic comedy, but it does sound feasible, i guess i'll give it a go soon
Cheers man!Attackthebase
Member
There's nothing wrong with dating multiple girls, until you enter an exclusive relationship with one of them. Every person has their personal definition of "perfect" in his/her subconscious. That's how people can judge others. So, if you date both persons, you should hopefully recognize which of them fits your ideal woman.
From what I read, it sounds like you are more into Woman B. Though, this may be from my own personal bias, since Lady B's criteria fits more of my ideal woman.
Risk/reward. You can settle and play it safe with Girl A, but where's the joy in doing that?
Z
ZombieFred
Unconfirmed Member
I agree here! Life is best enjoyed and experienced when there's a bit of chaos and crazy situations thrown at you especially when it comes to dating and relationships and all the lessons you get from here really do have an impact on you as a person that make you far stronger, better and more wiser so you can make your own life even better.
Z
ZombieFred
Unconfirmed Member
There's nothing wrong in that, it's only a six years difference (the same age of a women I am currently visiting for some mutual companionship when I am 22 and she's 28) and you're both adults.
Attackthebase
Member
That's perfectly fine.
I was thinking the same thing, but she occasionally brings up how young am I compared to her. It gets annoying.
Rubbish King
The gift that keeps on giving
She might be jealous
I can't remember what is usually said about that kind of statement right now but I think someone around here had a good explanation on what it could mean and how to respond (not really helpful I know). Either way, being young is hot, tell her that If the age thing is a problem, it's her problem imho.FleckSplat
Member
Just a follow-up to this:
Huge success! Danced with quite a few cute girls and definitely was the craziest motherfucker on the dance floor. I didn't know I could (first time dancing)!
Attackthebase
Member
Whenever I go to the piano bar, the older women fall in love with my youthful spirit (and appearance). It sounds like your woman is having some jealous issues. I cannot blame her, having one's youth is fantastic.
Putting it like this, makes it a lot easier
You have a Sly avatar, so I felt compelled to help a fellow Gaffer out. Glad to see my info eased your mind a little.
Feels good, doesn't it?
I was the same as you with the dancing not that long ago. I don't know if I'm any good but I'm having fun and people around me seem to like it. Last night, I danced with a fairly cute blonde I've seen before and she wanted to grind me and grabbed my hand. Unfortunately for her, her friend wasn't as amused apparently and dragged her away after we finally made eye contact afterwards. If anything, every night out bring funny memories Went to a club yesterday and decided to go on the dance floor.
Had a few smiles from girls (probably at my bad dancing), and I think some girls were deliberately trying to dance near me... I dunno.
Shit music though, but fun nonetheless. I just don't see myself being able to speak to/approach anyone in a situation like that though.
Had a few smiles from girls (probably at my bad dancing), and I think some girls were deliberately trying to dance near me... I dunno.
Shit music though, but fun nonetheless. I just don't see myself being able to speak to/approach anyone in a situation like that though.
Vermillion
Banned
Nice, Xun.
Question: I just got a number from this woman. How long should I wait before calling her?
I notice that this woman had blisters or boils on her arm and chest. I didn't notice it the first time I met her. I also noticed that she has 2-3 pill bottles in her purse. Is that a bad sign?
Edit: Anyone?
I notice that this woman had blisters or boils on her arm and chest. I didn't notice it the first time I met her. I also noticed that she has 2-3 pill bottles in her purse. Is that a bad sign?
Edit: Anyone?
Rubbish King
The gift that keeps on giving
i dont wanna say the wrong answer but I'm pretty sure its in the OTs OP
I'd say good luck, because by then she's probably more interested in stability and maturity than youth and looks.
But if you can pull it off, hey, go to town.
after 21,actual age is nearly irrelevant,its about how young you feel inside. if shes complaining about six yr difference, shes probably a old bag.
Call when you feel like it. Preferably sooner rather than later in case she forgets who you are. As for the pills, could be a "bad sign" but you don't know that yet.
Good for you
If it seems like they're moving closer to you, it's generally on purpose, even if they don't know it themselves. Assume they are interested! Keep telling yourself that's what happens when you go out. They smile at you because they like what they see (not because of any lack of dancing skills). And they are always near you because they want your attention.I agree on the music though. I don't know what kind of music there was last night of course but if it's anything similar to what's playing here, I know exactly how you feel xD Unfortunately, I've been clubbing so much lately that I've actually started to like the stuff and I currently have 7 David Guetta songs in my spotify playlist haha. So watch out for that
Edit: As for not being able to approach in that environment, I get that too. Getting someone's attention is really hard and there's no place to go and talk during the summer. Talking to strangers in that environment is still my biggest struggle even though I don't have a goal with the conversations, partly because it's physically hard to be heard there.
1. Unfortunate skin condition.
2. Coke/Meth head.
Look up coke and methodone skin boils in google images and see if they match. Warning, it's not pretty.
But better to know now than catch an std later.
How's that going for you for both of your peers?
thanks for the feedback guys. and i'm curious too. How's yours going??
Bam Bam Baklava
Member
Anybody here tried signing up for beautifulpeople.com?
Can't find it.
The Antitype
Banned
Built good rapport with a cute waitress today using a new line that just came to me. Didn't get the number close, cause she was bouncing around to different tables and I couldn't think of anything to frame it as that didn't sound lame or overly interested. It's right by my work, so I'll see her again within the week and pick up.
Anyway, I checked a message mid-way through our conversation (on purpose), and it was from a platonic female friend asking her to meet up for drinks with 'the girls' and to bring some guys. I smirked, and then I asked the waitress 'have you ever noticed how girls always refer to their friends as 'the girls'... it's like they're a backup band'
She's like 'hahaha, I do that!' and then whenever conversation would come back to plans for the future, or recent fun, I'd smirk and ask 'oh yeah, and did your backup singers come along for that one two'.
Lots of positive body language and interest in the conversation after that. We'll see if I can use it as a cue for the next time and say 'Hey, are your backup singers around?' or something. Have to be careful not to overdo it though.
Yeah, just to see if I would get in. I did, but hilariously, I don't mind most of the women on the site (in my area) particularly attractive.
Anyway, I checked a message mid-way through our conversation (on purpose), and it was from a platonic female friend asking her to meet up for drinks with 'the girls' and to bring some guys. I smirked, and then I asked the waitress 'have you ever noticed how girls always refer to their friends as 'the girls'... it's like they're a backup band'
She's like 'hahaha, I do that!' and then whenever conversation would come back to plans for the future, or recent fun, I'd smirk and ask 'oh yeah, and did your backup singers come along for that one two'.
Lots of positive body language and interest in the conversation after that. We'll see if I can use it as a cue for the next time and say 'Hey, are your backup singers around?' or something. Have to be careful not to overdo it though.
Yeah, just to see if I would get in. I did, but hilariously, I don't mind most of the women on the site (in my area) particularly attractive.
Bam Bam Baklava
Member
Damn man you must be handsome as hell.
The Antitype
Banned
Not really. Hang on, I'll take a pic quick. I think a lot of guys underestimate their looks (just like most women overestimate their sex appeal).
http://imageshack.us/f/37/j0hr0onema2091334872.jpg
lmao, yeah, 'Not Really'. 'Underestimate'. lulz
Bam Bam Baklava
Member
GTFO! You're like close to model status. If I had half your looks my entire life would be different right now, not an understatement.
The Antitype
Banned
You can't think that way or you'd never be happy. I've been called 'gross' by girls before, ugly, yada yada.
Everybody has shit they don't like about their appearance. You see good looks, cool. I see scaring from acne and big ears.
Anyone here ever been on a "break" with their significant other, and ended up getting back together? At least for the long term.
I could write at length about our issues, but I'm currently involved in one right now (I broke up with her). Days later I told her it was (among other things) something I regret and impulsive. She's asked for space - and I agreed.
I'm really not sure what to do / feel. One on hand, I'd really like to make us work again. I care about her tremendously, and somewhat took her for granted. On the other hand, if I sit around waiting during a certain amount of time, it's possible her feelings will (or already have) changed - and it would have all been for nothing.
I could write at length about our issues, but I'm currently involved in one right now (I broke up with her). Days later I told her it was (among other things) something I regret and impulsive. She's asked for space - and I agreed.
I'm really not sure what to do / feel. One on hand, I'd really like to make us work again. I care about her tremendously, and somewhat took her for granted. On the other hand, if I sit around waiting during a certain amount of time, it's possible her feelings will (or already have) changed - and it would have all been for nothing.
Everyone has those... but you also look like a younger Bradley Cooper. Wasn't he just voted World's Sexiest Man?
You also got accepted to a site, 99% of the people here would be rejected too.
So yeah. heh
Bam Bam Baklava
Member
Well it's either blame my looks or accept that my personality sucks, I'm socially awkward and weird.
The Antitype
Banned
I'd go with the latter. A personality can evolve with the person and their experience. Looks are pretty finite, and they disappear with age.
I was socially awkward for a long time. I got really into conversations and started talking really loud, never even realized it. And I had no idea how to talk to girls, cause I went to an all-boys private high school.
I just forced myself to interact with people. And I also started studying psychology, which helped too.
The Antitype
Banned
Make a list of everything about her that bugs you. Everything that made you want to ask for a break in the first place.
Everytime you think of her, take it out and read it. As many times as it takes to visualize those qualities.
The only way this works out well for the two of you is if she gets her space. If she does, then there`s a chance she`ll feel like starting up again. Maybe she won`t. It`s the risk you took.
But if you don`t give her her space, there is a 0% chance of getting back together.
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