Pursuing a girl/guy with an SO

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-COOLIO-

-COOLIO-

The Everyman
Im honestly wondering what the popular opinion on this issue is. Personally i think it's sleazy and stupid. If they do end up leaving their SOs for you then it's probably just gunna be bad news down the road anyway. My opinion is to just let relationships run their course and if your love interest frees up later on then just pursue it then.

Opinions?
 
-COOLIO- said:
Im honestly wondering what the popular opinion on this issue is. Personally i think it's sleazy and stupid. If they do end up leaving their SOs for you then it's probably just gunna be bad news down the road anyway. My opinion is to just let relationships run their course and if your love interest frees up later on then just pursue it then.

Opinions?
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simply put you can't trust any man or woman who would say okay to be pursued while in a relationship and you can't trust the pursurer to begin with
 
Byakuya769 said:
Ain't no ring, ain't no thing.
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DangerousMali said:
Would you say that if someone pursued your SO?
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I've had it done to me and done it myself. I'm not proud of either moment and neither relationships were ever going to work in all honestly.

But, if someone was actively trying to breakup a healthy and visibly great relationship then that's when it's sour. I'd personally never do that, the time that I have the relationship was already falling apart and it was written across both of their faces.

and the girl I did pursue, after our shit burned to the ground, she's now in probably the best relationship of her life. Maybe my interference was the only thing allowing her to get out of the bad relationship. I dunno, she's happy now and that's good.
 
a SO.

I abort the moment I find out they have a boyfriend. It's fucked up, and will only lead to you doubting that person if you do end up getting her, when they go have fun with their friends.
 
Pursuing someone with a significant other for the purpose of getting with them is messed up.
However, if you happen to build a real connection and develop feelings, don't stop yourself.
 
Nothing wrong with it as relationships are often mostly about ownership. The idea of cheating is kind of ridiculous when you actually think about it.
 
How can you pursue a relationship with someone you already know you can't trust to not cheat? Unless you're just doing it for the sex, then uhh I guess it's both better and worse at the same time.
 
Yah I don't like it. I mean, if she leaves the guy, that's cool. But if she's leaving him FOR you, or cheating on him with you, that's not cool. Speaks of bad things for the possible future. I like things to take a natural course. With a clear beginning and an ending, etc. I'm not against reprisals where you get back together again though.

Of course the rules of love and attraction love breaking and cancelling each other.
 
oneHeero said:
Shouldnt you trust your SO to do the right thing? And if they dont, would you really want to be in the relationship if they can be scooped?
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I agree and i do trust my SO, which is why i would not be bothered by pursuers. (but if my SO was my wife, i would be mad as hell)

It's desperate and disrespectful
 
Why would you even make this thread when you know common knowledge is that its sleazy. Unless you're trying to steal someone's girlfriend.
 
-COOLIO- said:
Im honestly wondering what the popular opinion on this issue is. Personally i think it's sleazy and stupid. If they do end up leaving their SOs for you then it's probably just gunna be bad news down the road anyway. My opinion is to just let relationships run their course and if your love interest frees up later on then just pursue it then.

Opinions?
Click to expand...

My brother in law left his wife for another woman he worked with. They have been married for 10 years and have a son. He is happier than ever now. He admitted to me that if he hadn't met the "other woman" he would probably have stuck it out with his wife and been miserable. His thought is that he finally found his soulmate, but took a bumpy ride getting there. His ex-wife is now married with 2 kids and happy as well. Sometimes that is the nudge you need to get out of the misery you are in.

As far being the other man/woman, it would mean sharing for awhile and having faith that the situation will change. Has to be a hard position to be in.
 
I've gone with the advice of "Just because there's a goalkeeper doesn't mean you can't score."

Someone's relationship with another person isn't my problem.
 
If it's a friend, I don't do it. Otherwise all bets are off. He/she's going to cheat with someone else if you don't pursue it anyway.
 
When I was a single alcoholic manwhore hearing a girl had a boyfriend/girlfriend made them about 50 times more desirable to me. Sad thing is they were no harder to woo than single women. More than half of my sexual partners had boyfriend's from what I can gather.

That said if I don't know their significant other as a friend I couldn't care less if their gf cheats on them with me or someone else she hid the boyfriend thing from. So fuck it I have little/no respect for the average person anyways.




(My fiance/gf of 2 years was dating a girl for over a year before we met/hit it off/hooked up in the same day) I don't really care how/why we got together but she helped me leave my horrible cycle of a new sexual partner every 3-4 days along with way too much boozing.
 
No. If the girl has a bf, no. I wouldn't pursue it. It's a shitty thing to do. Disrespectful and shameless. Just imagine if the same happened to you? Some other random guy is pursuing your girl. Not a right thing to do.
 
i dont pursue chicks in relationships. plenty of single girls out there, theres no reason for me to go after one already with someone else. if shes being treated wrong, not my job to "save" her, she gotta nut up and save herself
 
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