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Dating-Age |OT4| Realise You're Living in the Golden Years

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it's been two months and i am still hopelessly in love with my ex, how long is this supposed to fucking take :( i am so tired of this :/

It takes awhile if you truly love the other person. It can take a couple of months before you even consider dating/going out with other girls, it is a normal process. Try to hang out with friends or get new hobbies to try to think less about her, it helps.
 
it's been two months and i am still hopelessly in love with my ex, how long is this supposed to fucking take :( i am so tired of this :/

Dude. My girlfriend in HS lasted a month, but the pain lasted for 4 years. Another ex, we were together for almost 2 years - it's taken a little over a year to finally move on.

Some are easier than others.
When I met my current fiancee she still had a boyfriend, one which she had been for awhile. For various reasons things between them were not working out, but it was pretty obvious to me that they still loved/cared for each other. I fell really hard for her, and she ended up cheating on him with me. We became really close and she started telling me everything about her ex and other issues with other guys. It took a toll on me. Deep down it affected me a lot, and it got me thinking that she might do the same to me. That first couple of months with her were full of drama, and at times I thought it wouldn't last long, because it got to a point in which both of us felt guilty.

Now we have been together for 4 years, and we are planning to get married next year during summer. My advice to you would be to ask yourself if you are ready for the drama that will ensue, because you will be at the center of it. Also if things do happen between the two of you give her time, and I really mean it. Also try to give her all your trust, because that would be the pillar of a healthy relationship. Also ask her is she is ready to leave her boyfriend, and if she does it do not rush things.

Personally, if I was in the same situation with another girl I wouldn't do it again. But I don't regret what I went through with my fiancee. I found my other half, and all of the ups and downs were worth it. They made us a stronger couple.

Best of luck, and I hope that helps a little.
Yeah, definitely. I have repeatedly made it clear that what is going on between her and her bf is for her to determine. I told her that I should not be an influence or factor in what she decides to do. Basically, she needs to sort out things for her own betterment, not to please me or anyone else.
Today I had to get it off my chest that if we are to continue, in any capacity, one thing needs to end before another begins. She then said she couldn't sleep because she felt guilty. We talked a bit about that.
This is the first girl I've felt open with discussing all the awkward mess with. Being able to frankly discuss how -I- feel about the situation and for her to respond respectively and thoughtfully, to me, speaks volumes - both in the progress I've made since my less assertive self and it speaks volumes of her own maturity and level-headedness. Yes, I feel we're in a gray area now because we are both aware of the attraction we have for one another and she's prolonging the necessary or inevitable, but I still feel our communication is easing the process.

I just hope she affords the same consideration for her current bf. Having experienced this situation, but with reversed roles, I know I would have wanted my ex to be much more forward with what is really going on, not lie to me about her feelings for another guy, while continuing to see him. This girl seems way more mature in that regard, especially since I'm on the "bad" side and being very clear about boundaries.
 
Dude. My girlfriend in HS lasted a month, but the pain lasted for 4 years. Another ex, we were together for almost 2 years - it's taken a little over a year to finally move on.

Some are easier than others.

Yeah, definitely. I have repeatedly made it clear that what is going on between her and her bf is for her to determine. I told her that I should not be an influence or factor in what she decides to do. Basically, she needs to sort out things for her own betterment, not to please me or anyone else.
Today I had to get it off my chest that if we are to continue, in any capacity, one thing needs to end before another begins. She then said she couldn't sleep because she felt guilty. We talked a bit about that.
This is the first girl I've felt open with discussing all the awkward mess with. Being able to frankly discuss how -I- feel about the situation and for her to respond respectively and thoughtfully, to me, speaks volumes - both in the progress I've made since my less assertive self and it speaks volumes of her own maturity and level-headedness. Yes, I feel we're in a gray area now because we are both aware of the attraction we have for one another and she's prolonging the necessary or inevitable, but I still feel our communication is easing the process.

I just hope she affords the same consideration for her current bf. Having experienced this situation, but with reversed roles, I know I would have wanted my ex to be much more forward with what is really going on, not lie to me about her feelings for another guy, while continuing to see him. This girl seems way more mature in that regard, especially since I'm on the "bad" side and being very clear about boundaries.

It seems to me that she really likes you, and that obviously she might not be happy with her current bf. It is also good that you are not putting yourself between her and him. Are you okay with her talking about her relationship with you? If not, let her know about it. If yes, be prepared for the toll it is going to take on you, because it will happen sooner or later.

Also,has she cheated on him with you? If she did, do not judge her, it is not up to you to do it, and try not to give it second thought, believe me is not worth it. If you really like this girl fight for her, and try not to give second thoughts about the bf. It will end up being about you and her, if things do work out, not him. Remember that if after a couple of weeks she is still with him, it would be better for you to let her go for your own sake.
 
She has said that she's been thinking of ending it for a while, but since they live together she doesn't want to just kick him out. It's understandable. She started to talk about her relationship, but I stopped her - basically explaining that I can't give her any advice since I'm clearly biased. We haven't done anything aside from have lunch and hug goodbye - strictly platonic.

I've tried to make it as clear as possible that I'm not trying to get between her and him - it is her business that she must attend to without any input from me. She knows how I feel about her and that's about all she needs when considering what she wants to do. I told her, regardless of what she chooses, as long as she feels it's the best course of action, that's what she should do - not to worry about me "waiting for her."
 
She has said that she's been thinking of ending it for a while, but since they live together she doesn't want to just kick him out. It's understandable. She started to talk about her relationship, but I stopped her - basically explaining that I can't give her any advice since I'm clearly biased. We haven't done anything aside from have lunch and hug goodbye - strictly platonic.

I've tried to make it as clear as possible that I'm not trying to get between her and him - it is her business that she must attend to without any input from me. She knows how I feel about her and that's about all she needs when considering what she wants to do. I told her, regardless of what she chooses, as long as she feels it's the best course of action, that's what she should do - not to worry about me "waiting for her."

Show her this post Unicorn. No but seriously, go get yourself another girl.
 
She has said that she's been thinking of ending it for a while, but since they live together she doesn't want to just kick him out. It's understandable. She started to talk about her relationship, but I stopped her - basically explaining that I can't give her any advice since I'm clearly biased. We haven't done anything aside from have lunch and hug goodbye - strictly platonic.

I've tried to make it as clear as possible that I'm not trying to get between her and him - it is her business that she must attend to without any input from me. She knows how I feel about her and that's about all she needs when considering what she wants to do. I told her, regardless of what she chooses, as long as she feels it's the best course of action, that's what she should do - not to worry about me "waiting for her."

Oh, if she does live with him, it does make things a little more complicated.
Do you want to be with her or just have a fling? Also, even if you don't want to, you are probably already between the two of them.

I know you are probably in a very uncomfortable situation, being "the other guy" sucks a lot.
 
Show her this post Unicorn. No but seriously, go get yourself another girl.

We've talked about it enough. This is a more condensed version of what I've already said to her haha. Why get another, don't think this will pan out?
Oh, if she does live with him, it does make things a little more complicated.
Do you want to be with her or just have a fling? Also, even if you don't want to, you are probably already between the two of them.

I know you are probably in a very uncomfortable situation, being "the other guy" sucks a lot.
It's her place and it sounds like he's just there for free, so idk.
 
We've talked about it enough. This is a more condensed version of what I've already said to her haha. Why get another, don't think this will pan out?

It's her place and it sounds like he's just there for free, so idk.

Unicorn, how emotionally involved are you so far? Is she in the same spot as you? How uncomfortable is this for you? If it is really uncomfortable bail the fuck out, and don't look back.
 
I don't feel uncomfortable. I feel confident in my feelings for her and confident in that she has strong feelings for me. If, when the "holidays" are over, and she still hasn't decided or resolved her personal affairs, I feel safe in saying I will detach and move along.
 
I don't feel uncomfortable. I feel confident in my feelings for her and confident in that she has strong feelings for me. If, when the "holidays" are over, and she still hasn't decided or resolved her personal affairs, I feel safe in saying I will detach and move along.

It is really good that you are taking all of this in such a mature way. Best of luck, hopefully everything works out for you.
 
Thanks, I'm quite surprised how well it all (seemingly) is going. Communication has been clear between us and I think that has been important and will only lay down a strong foundation if we do end up moving forward. If not, this past week has provided such great strides in my own assertiveness and confidence, so if all else fails I know I've grown.
 
not staying committed to one girl until I'm ready to get married.

for now I'm just
tumblr_lnfrayk8Hw1qkwc9zo1_500.gif
 
We've talked about it enough. This is a more condensed version of what I've already said to her haha. Why get another, don't think this will pan out?

Well, mostly because it's not the most ideal thing to do, falling for a girl with a boyfriend. From the looks of it you've been very respectful, to him as well. But there are less complicated, and hurtful ways of finding someone. Not just, potentially, for him. But for you as well. What if she decides to stay with him? Can you cope with that? Because as you said, you're falling hard. What's her take on this btw? Has she made it clear how she feels about you? Either through actions, or words?
 
Sheesh, I've been texting this girl for 2.5 weeks since our first date and still haven't found a day to go out with her again (she's been busy with work or sick). You'd sure think that she would have lost interest by now and would just ignore me, but she keeps replying... maybe she's just very polite? I'm leaving town next week for a whole month, if something happens it will probably have to be by then.

similar situation
 
Hi guys. I'm fairly new to posting on GAF but have been visiting for quite a while.

I am a currently single female and am having the worst luck finding the right guy for me. I just want someone who plays a lot of video games, someone who is just as passionate about them as I am. I'd like a drinking buddy, so we can chill at night. I want to have fun with this person, and most importantly, I want to be myself around this person. I want to be able to talk endlessly about Hyrule's history (for instance) and have him join in and add spice to the conversation.

I'm really low maintenance, and I'm not stressing over whether or not this guy exists, but in your opinion, how do I find serious gamer guys who can bring something to a relationship? I've tried online dating stuff and they'll open with video game conversation and then it'll taper off.. Almost like they've run out of things to say.

Have any of you here had any luck finding your other half, and if so, how and where did it happen? I've been single now for two years and I'm lonely and sexually frustrated! :D
 
Hi guys. I'm fairly new to posting on GAF but have been visiting for quite a while.

I am a currently single female and am having the worst luck finding the right guy for me. I just want someone who plays a lot of video games, someone who is just as passionate about them as I am. I'd like a drinking buddy, so we can chill at night. I want to have fun with this person, and most importantly, I want to be myself around this person. I want to be able to talk endlessly about Hyrule's history (for instance) and have him join in and add spice to the conversation.

I'm really low maintenance, and I'm not stressing over whether or not this guy exists, but in your opinion, how do I find serious gamer guys who can bring something to a relationship? I've tried online dating stuff and they'll open with video game conversation and then it'll taper off.. Almost like they've run out of things to say.

Have any of you here had any luck finding your other half, and if so, how and where did it happen? I've been single now for two years and I'm lonely and sexually frustrated! :D

disgonbegud.gif

You're...serious, yes? Am I taking bait, here?
 
I'm serious!! :D The guys that live around here are all gamer posers. I'm a makeup artist so the only guys I come into contact with aren't interested in women, so that rules that out.
 
Hi guys. I'm fairly new to posting on GAF but have been visiting for quite a while.

I am a currently single female and am having the worst luck finding the right guy for me. I just want someone who plays a lot of video games, someone who is just as passionate about them as I am. I'd like a drinking buddy, so we can chill at night. I want to have fun with this person, and most importantly, I want to be myself around this person. I want to be able to talk endlessly about Hyrule's history (for instance) and have him join in and add spice to the conversation.

I'm really low maintenance, and I'm not stressing over whether or not this guy exists, but in your opinion, how do I find serious gamer guys who can bring something to a relationship? I've tried online dating stuff and they'll open with video game conversation and then it'll taper off.. Almost like they've run out of things to say.

Have any of you here had any luck finding your other half, and if so, how and where did it happen? I've been single now for two years and I'm lonely and sexually frustrated! :D

wUPl5d9.gif



Write what you wrote here on your dating profiles, I'm sure you'll get what you want and maybe have several options to choose from ^-^
Or check your PM box, I'm sure it's already full of proposals
 
Well then, depending on your location (metropolitan, suburban, boondocks), you've got options.

And I say this with all seriousness...college versions of many of us here are dropping their jaws right now. But since this is now, I'd recommend something like a convention, or attending meetups at those conventions. That way it's more a group of people getting to know each other, and the subjects will go wherever they may.

Or check your PM box, I'm sure it's already full of proposals

Probably true.
 
Hi guys. I'm fairly new to posting on GAF but have been visiting for quite a while.

I am a currently single female and am having the worst luck finding the right guy for me. I just want someone who plays a lot of video games, someone who is just as passionate about them as I am. I'd like a drinking buddy, so we can chill at night. I want to have fun with this person, and most importantly, I want to be myself around this person. I want to be able to talk endlessly about Hyrule's history (for instance) and have him join in and add spice to the conversation.

I'm really low maintenance, and I'm not stressing over whether or not this guy exists, but in your opinion, how do I find serious gamer guys who can bring something to a relationship? I've tried online dating stuff and they'll open with video game conversation and then it'll taper off.. Almost like they've run out of things to say.

Have any of you here had any luck finding your other half, and if so, how and where did it happen? I've been single now for two years and I'm lonely and sexually frustrated! :D

lol. You forgot to mention that you love Nolan movies and want to discuss the Marvel universe.
 
Write what you wrote here on your dating profiles, I'm sure you'll get what you want and maybe have several options to choose from

I have done that. I've just accepted the fact that I'm a nerd and I don't hide it at all. Maybe I'm just too passionate about things? And I have gone to conventions, but you'd be surprised how hard it is to get a guy talking sometimes. Maybe it's just me.. I dunno.

Thanks for all the suggestions so far.
 
I have done that. I've just accepted the fact that I'm a nerd and I don't hide it at all. Maybe I'm just too passionate about things? And I have gone to conventions, but you'd be surprised how hard it is to get a guy talking sometimes. Maybe it's just me.. I dunno.

Thanks for all the suggestions so far.

Lot's of single guys on this forum that are gamers and looking for a lady. If you take your time and open yourself up to possibly meeting someone here, it will definitely happen.
 
All the gamer girls I get speaking to on dating webites seem to lose interest after a few days. I'm a gamer (obviously) and would say I'm reasonably good looking too (average at worst) with a great personality (/end ego stroke), yet these girls who apparently want to talk about nerdy shit all day long don't give a guy like me the time of day. I can get a number--or even a date--out of some chick I have no common ground with, but not a girl who I'd genuinely want to spend time and build a rapport with.

...

So I texted that girl I mentioned around lunch time...no response. I may have been a little slow at actually asking her out, but at least I feel relieved now that I have even if she doesn't get back to me. This is one of those nerdy gamer girls as well (at least I managed to get a number this time ;D)
 
All the gamer girls I get speaking to on dating webites seem to lose interest after a few days. I'm a gamer (obviously) and would say I'm reasonably good looking too (average at worst) with a great personality (/end ego stroke), yet these girls who apparently want to talk about nerdy shit all day long don't give a guy like me the time of day. I can get a number--or even a date--out of some chick I have no common ground with, but not a girl who I'd genuinely want to spend time and build a rapport with.

...

So I texted that girl I mentioned around lunch time...no response. I may have been a little slow at actually asking her out, but at least I feel relieved now that I have even if she doesn't get back to me. This is one of those nerdy gamer girls as well (at least I managed to get a number this time ;D)

There are many different iterations of "gamer girls" out there, and I seriously can understand the frustration of trying to find girls who legitimately game for real.

I think the same can be said in regards to my situation. I hope you can find a girl who is like you and loves games but doesn't play the bad kind - mind games.
 
I have done that. I've just accepted the fact that I'm a nerd and I don't hide it at all. Maybe I'm just too passionate about things? And I have gone to conventions, but you'd be surprised how hard it is to get a guy talking sometimes. Maybe it's just me.. I dunno.

Thanks for all the suggestions so far.

That's because lots of guys don't know how to talk, and are like a deer in headlights when a girl approaches them. ESPECIALLY those guys that aren't familiar with talking to women.

Don't be afraid to show a like, or an extreme like, or passion for something, though. That's a recipe for disaster.
 
When I met my current fiancee she still had a boyfriend, one which she had been for awhile. For various reasons things between them were not working out, but it was pretty obvious to me that they still loved/cared for each other. I fell really hard for her, and she ended up cheating on him with me. We became really close and she started telling me everything about her ex and other issues with other guys. It took a toll on me. Deep down it affected me a lot, and it got me thinking that she might do the same to me. That first couple of months with her were full of drama, and at times I thought it wouldn't last long, because it got to a point in which both of us felt guilty.

Now we have been together for 4 years, and we are planning to get married next year during summer. My advice to you would be to ask yourself if you are ready for the drama that will ensue, because you will be at the center of it. Also if things do happen between the two of you give her time, and I really mean it. Also try to give her all your trust, because that would be the pillar of a healthy relationship. Also ask her is she is ready to leave her boyfriend, and if she does it do not rush things.

Personally, if I was in the same situation with another girl I wouldn't do it again. But I don't regret what I went through with my fiancee. I found my other half, and all of the ups and downs were worth it. They made us a stronger couple.

Best of luck, and I hope that helps a little.

Happy that you two are together and all, but man, having just lost my GF of 5-years to another guy at her work, I hate stories like this so much. I get that you are both happy, but think of the other side. I've been an emotional wreck the past 2 months.

Honestly, if you're crushing on a girl in a relationship, back off. It's just not fair to either party. Wait for the relationship to end, don't cheat, don't get involved, and then it's fair game. But to have influence on ending another relationship...I dunno, I just don't think that's right.
 
I mentioned this girl months ago, but I don't post here often anymore because I've been doing me as of late.

New lady friend. My age, but has a one year old. The gal is real sweet thus far, games, watches anime, has a similar sense of humor to mine. She's moving back to the area next month. We talk on the phone a lot, I don't really do that with anyone lol. She asked me out on a date for when she moves back, so that's cool. She works, so I know she has her head on straight.

But, GAF, I keep picking apart the whole kid thing.

What do I do?
 
I mentioned this girl months ago, but I don't post here often anymore because I've been doing me as of late.

New lady friend. My age, but has a one year old. The gal is real sweet thus far, games, watches anime, has a similar sense of humor to mine. She's moving back to the area next month. We talk on the phone a lot, I don't really do that with anyone lol. She asked me out on a date for when she moves back, so that's cool. She works, so I know she has her head on straight.

But, GAF, I keep picking apart the whole kid thing.

What do I do?

She's got commitments. Do you want her free all the time? Won't happen. And if she WAS, I'd be worried even more. It IS a 1 year old though, not an infant. Much easier than a newbie.
 
I believe that if you're doing everything in your power to become a better person, and it's still not working, you're either doing it for the wrong reasons or you're trying to improve in the wrong areas. It's as simple as that.

Well if getting into better shape, getting a (much) better job and making a lot of new friends are the wrong areas I think want to be right.

I would recommend some more hands-on books perhaps, somewhere along the lines of PUA. Not for the techniques and mindsets necessarily, but some of the books, Magic Bullets for instance, should contain some golden nuggets that might help you. You never know anyway.

I appreciate the advice, but I'm not down with anything PUA related. It just doesn't work with my personality. I'm a straight shooter and bold when I need to be, so I have little to no tolerance for games. Which is why I immediately stop caring if they're asking me how to pick up other guys, or string me along with plans that constantly fall through. Way I see it when stuff like that happens they're either not interested, and if they are they're just trying to "test" me, which is a red flag for immaturity. Either way it's not worth my time.

Personally I think I'm solid in most areas, I'm just an idiot at gauging interest. Which is why I was asking for what other people here personally look for. I've seen those IOI videos and even looked through them again the other day but this video highlights the reason they don't resonate with me:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SBOtj1RmaUE

A professional body language expert sets up an event to see these IOI's in action. After the party he's interviewing them to see how they really felt. The women dismissed any claims of interest and his final verdict was (paraphrasing) "Flirting, to women, is just good manners. But if men are always picking up positive signals, it's no wonder why they're always so confused." So instead of looking at the standard tells you read everywhere, I'm curious what you guys specifically look for.

I have done that. I've just accepted the fact that I'm a nerd and I don't hide it at all. Maybe I'm just too passionate about things? And I have gone to conventions, but you'd be surprised how hard it is to get a guy talking sometimes. Maybe it's just me.. I dunno.

Thanks for all the suggestions so far.

Video games are cool and it's great that you enjoy them, but I'd recommend that you avoid defining yourself through them. I know it's a gaming forum and all that, but even here it might help you out to make your profile a little more well rounded. While there is a crowd that will think it's amazing you like to play a lot of video games and enjoy that in a partner, in the end the relationship is between you and another person. Not a television.

Ya know?
 
She's got commitments. Do you want her free all the time? Won't happen. And if she WAS, I'd be worried even more. It IS a 1 year old though, not an infant. Much easier than a newbie.

Naw I kinda like having days where it's just me and my computer haha. I've never really had a relationship, but I imagine being with someone every single day makes the relationship more difficult.

She's different than other girls I've had things with. She recently texted me saying that she doesn't care that I'm in a wheelchair, and that I'm handsome regardless. I don't know whether to take that as a compliment or not :lol
 
Video games are cool and it's great that you enjoy them, but I'd recommend that you avoid defining yourself through them. I know it's a gaming forum and all that, but even here it might help you out to make your profile a little more well rounded. While there is a crowd that will think it's amazing you like to play a lot of video games and enjoy that in a partner, in the end the relationship is between you and another person. Not a television.

Ya know?

I totally agree and I don't define myself only by enjoying video games. Believe me, I've had my share of bad relationships and I've learned a lot. I consider myself to be very open minded and well rounded, and hopefully someone will come along who will be able to know all of me. Video games are a great starting point because they're fun, I like them, and I'd like to share that with someone too. Amongst other things of course :)
 
Naw I kinda like having days where it's just me and my computer haha. I've never really had a relationship, but I imagine being with someone every single day makes the relationship more difficult.

She's different than other girls I've had things with. She recently texted me saying that she doesn't care that I'm in a wheelchair, and that I'm handsome regardless. I don't know whether to take that as a compliment or not :lol

Being with someone every single day is what lots of relationships end up being (even if you get some staycation time in front of the computer...I miss that). And let's be clear here, it doesn't matter at all that you're in a wheelchair. Doesn't define you at all and I'm sure you know that.

That she doesn't give a fuck and told you as much is awesome. Show's she's not shallow, which doesn't necessarily make her datable, but if she was shallow it would just kill it for me.

Anyway, see where it goes. A big part of a relationship is doing things you've never done before and experiencing those feelings/actions/events together.

I totally agree and I don't define myself only by enjoying video games. Believe me, I've had my share of bad relationships and I've learned a lot. I consider myself to be very open minded and well rounded, and hopefully someone will come along who will be able to know all of me. Video games are a great starting point because they're fun, I like them, and I'd like to share that with someone too. Amongst other things of course :)

There you have it. Keep it as a starting point...hell, work it into a date. First time I went to my wife's apartment she started the PS2 up and challenged me to a round of Tekken Tag. Turned me on more to her, sure, but we just went into other activities after that. Played a round of scrabble, ordered delivery Chinese food, and talked damn near to bed time.

You'll find someone, but that it's taken two years is standing out to me. Would you call yourself a picky person? Not that you don't have a right to be, here, but I'm wondering if the search for Mr. Right isn't drilling down so far that it's blinding you to opportunity.
 
Had a great night. Was looking forward to the salsa tonight, mostly for the cool girl I posted about last week. Well, just one other guy was there, the rest was missing. So I thought: "bummer, just my luck." Apparently the lesson was cancalled because of really bad weather. Just as I was about to leave she showed up, also dissapointed that nobody was there.

We decide to go to the local casino, which has a dance floor. Just the two of us. But we get some drinks before the dancing part of the casino opens in two hours. We hit it off reeaaaally well, the time flies by. Lots of laughs, eye contact, funny jokes, serious stuff. After two and a half hours we think: "wow, time flies, the casino is already open."

So we head over there, I mention I've never been there before. She says: "No worries, I come here quite a bit with my boyfriend, I'll show you around." Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck! My mouth keeps talking, but that's sort of what's going through my mind. Apparently there's a workshop going on which we join and we continue having a blast. But with every joke I make, or every time she makes eye contact (in a really innocent way) I think about how her boyfriend might feel about it. Fuck fuck fuck.

As DarkChronic above me said: I never want to be the guy who causes trouble in another guys relationship.No matter how cool she is.

So, onto the gym tomorrow, releasing my frustration on the iron :p
 
There you have it. Keep it as a starting point...hell, work it into a date. First time I went to my wife's apartment she started the PS2 up and challenged me to a round of Tekken Tag. Turned me on more to her, sure, but we just went into other activities after that. Played a round of scrabble, ordered delivery Chinese food, and talked damn near to bed time.

You'll find someone, but that it's taken two years is standing out to me. Would you call yourself a picky person? Not that you don't have a right to be, here, but I'm wondering if the search for Mr. Right isn't drilling down so far that it's blinding you to opportunity.

I've dated people in that two year time frame, just the chemistry wasn't there. I got out of a really unhealthy relationship and I needed time to reconnect with myself and figure out who I was again. I'm a very giving person, and in that particular situation years ago I gave too much to someone who wasn't ever planning on giving it back. I don't need to go into a whole lot of details because I am sure lots of you have been with someone who raised all the red flags imaginable and you looked the other way for a time. And, I don't like being "that girl" who talks about the past.

So! That being said, I'd just like to find someone like-minded. I'm 28 years old.. and I'm tired of the bar scene and the night club scene. It's my own fault too for working so much, but in my free time I'd like to be around someone who makes me laugh, and possibly feel what it's like to be "liked" again by somebody. I've kinda forgotten what that feels like.

I remember having to wait until my ex left for work for me to enjoy some of the things he didn't, like particular movies or games, because he'd make fun of me otherwise or argue about how stupid it was. It sounds silly now but I lost who I was, because I was scared of what he'd do. He wasn't a very nice person, to put it simply. So, I guess when I posted earlier about finding a gamer, what I really meant was finding someone who I could watch the silliest of things with, try the weirdest food, read the oddest things, and travel to the most random places, together, because we respect each other and learn from each other and discover life together without judgement or ridicule.
 
I remember having to wait until my ex left for work for me to enjoy some of the things he didn't, like particular movies or games, because he'd make fun of me otherwise or argue about how stupid it was. It sounds silly now but I lost who I was, because I was scared of what he'd do. He wasn't a very nice person, to put it simply. So, I guess when I posted earlier about finding a gamer, what I really meant was finding someone who I could watch the silliest of things with, try the weirdest food, read the oddest things, and travel to the most random places, together, because we respect each other and learn from each other and discover life together without judgement or ridicule.
Yeah, what you just said. Someone who's a "gamer", even someone who likes all the games you do, won't necessarily respect what TV you want to watch or what food you want to eat or what neighborhood you want to live in or how frugal or not you want to be and so on.

But you knowing what you really want on a deeper level than "likes the same surface stuff I do" sounds like you've got your head on straight. now it's just about meeting people and figuring out who's the right guy.

and I'm tired of the bar scene and the night club scene.
Maybe take that time and money and try joining classes or social clubs? I dunno.
 
I've dated people in that two year time frame, just the chemistry wasn't there. I got out of a really unhealthy relationship and I needed time to reconnect with myself and figure out who I was again. I'm a very giving person, and in that particular situation years ago I gave too much to someone who wasn't ever planning on giving it back. I don't need to go into a whole lot of details because I am sure lots of you have been with someone who raised all the red flags imaginable and you looked the other way for a time. And, I don't like being "that girl" who talks about the past.

So! That being said, I'd just like to find someone like-minded. I'm 28 years old.. and I'm tired of the bar scene and the night club scene. It's my own fault too for working so much, but in my free time I'd like to be around someone who makes me laugh, and possibly feel what it's like to be "liked" again by somebody. I've kinda forgotten what that feels like.

I remember having to wait until my ex left for work for me to enjoy some of the things he didn't, like particular movies or games, because he'd make fun of me otherwise or argue about how stupid it was. It sounds silly now but I lost who I was, because I was scared of what he'd do. He wasn't a very nice person, to put it simply. So, I guess when I posted earlier about finding a gamer, what I really meant was finding someone who I could watch the silliest of things with, try the weirdest food, read the oddest things, and travel to the most random places, together, because we respect each other and learn from each other and discover life together without judgement or ridicule.

Damn, I can totally relate to all of this. Here, pretty much everyone shuns gaming unless it's rock band or mario kart or COD. Somehow it's ok and acceptable then. At best I might have to find a date here that's indifferent to the fact that I play games (and have an entertainment system pretty much tailored to doing so) while trying to maintain some equilibrium of attention where I'm not accused of "neglecting" the relationship.

That said, since I did almost nothing but working and gaming for a long time, that's a lot of what I talk about even with friends. My friends are even older than me, they're mid-30s while I'm still 28 lol.
 
Damn, I can totally relate to all of this.

From the lowest dungeon to the highest peak I fought with the Balrog of Morgoth... Until at last I threw down my enemy and smote his ruin upon the mountain side... Darkness took me, and I strayed out of thought and time... The stars wheeled overhead, and every day was as long as a life age of the earth... But it was not the end. I felt life in me again.

Life after bad relationships according to Gandalf.
 
MistressMoitie, get ready for 1 million PMs o.o

And I know what you mean. My lady friends that are gamers somehow have bad luck. They complain yet keep choosing to date the same type of guys :/
 
MistressMoitie, get ready for 1 million PMs o.o

And I know what you mean. My lady friends that are gamers somehow have bad luck. They complain yet keep choosing to date the same type of guys :/

lol, I'd love to hear the PM count after this too.

But seriously, the gamer ladies seem to be elsewhere. I think there are a larger amount of country-type girls where I am. Either that or they're all taken, whatever.
 
Hi guys. I'm fairly new to posting on GAF but have been visiting for quite a while.

I am a currently single female and am having the worst luck finding the right guy for me. I just want someone who plays a lot of video games, someone who is just as passionate about them as I am. I'd like a drinking buddy, so we can chill at night. I want to have fun with this person, and most importantly, I want to be myself around this person. I want to be able to talk endlessly about Hyrule's history (for instance) and have him join in and add spice to the conversation.

I'm really low maintenance, and I'm not stressing over whether or not this guy exists, but in your opinion, how do I find serious gamer guys who can bring something to a relationship? I've tried online dating stuff and they'll open with video game conversation and then it'll taper off.. Almost like they've run out of things to say.

Have any of you here had any luck finding your other half, and if so, how and where did it happen? I've been single now for two years and I'm lonely and sexually frustrated! :D

Not going to lie, this sounds way too good to be true. :P I cant speak for anyone other than me but anyone I have enjoyed getting my drink on with is the type of person who probably wouldn't want a gamer sadly. It sucks but maybe some guys are holding back - I know I do, I sort of hint towards video games but its unfortunately not the first thing most people find attractive so if I don't get a positive vibe I kind of drop it.

Came here to vent about the fact that a girl I got pretty close with is now basically brushing me off. About a month ago she wouldn't stop blowing up my phone - it now sucks that she has no interest in even communicating with me... not even just as friends. It really hurts to have been so close and now to be brushed off. I am hoping she is just busy but we did sort of fall out recently and she has been totally cold since. :(
 
You want me to post pictures of myself here..??

Your other alternatives are to forward them to a resident sharp knee expert here (do we have one?), or to refuse and just deny having sharp knees lol

nvm Unicorn just determined you don't have sharp knees.

Came here to vent about the fact that a girl I got pretty close with is now basically brushing me off. About a month ago she wouldn't stop blowing up my phone - it now sucks that she has no interest in even communicating with me... not even just as friends. It really hurts to have been so close and now to be brushed off. I am hoping she is just busy but we did sort of fall out recently and she has been totally cold since. :(

That's terrible, actually the latest girl I dated did this to me. Complete silence on the texting, I think I was blocked on Skype and everything else under the sun too. After 2 months of hitting it off and having a good time, it's tough to swallow.
 
Your other alternatives are to forward them to a resident sharp knee expert here (do we have one?), or to refuse and just deny having sharp knees lol

nvm Unicorn just determined you don't have sharp knees.



That's terrible, actually the latest girl I dated did this to me. Complete silence on the texting, I think I was blocked on Skype and everything else under the sun too. After 2 months of hitting it off and having a good time, it's tough to swallow.

Worst thing is I know its not even like she's that mad at me she's blocked me... she's just totally lost interest. Circumstances suck and have put geographical distance between us but that's potentially only temporary and I would have really loved to be able to at least text back and forth once or twice every so often with the warmth we had... but the total coldness. Man.

I have learnt a lot from knowing her, she totally twisted me and would not let go until I told her I liked her and then once she had the upper hand between us she totally took advantage of that. Ultimately initially for a few reasons I had no romantic interest in her... but she got totally under my skin more recently and as soon as she 'won' she dropped me. Sucks to get played like that. Sucks to still want contact with someone like that... but im confused. Ultimately she would have been a great person to sometimes hang out with - a lot of fun even if she is dangerous romantically. I would have still been down for friendship but her coldness hurts because there's no chance of even that.
 
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