It's natural so it could go any route. It could be anything from getting you a small gift to showing up at your work (assuming you ask for this, etc) or anything that involves a sacrifice of any kind of their end. Not trying to get all clinical about it, but you'll know if you feel like you're overdoing it and feel unappreciated. It's just natural stuff.
And it doesn't take place over one date. These things take time.
So, just looking at the first date...nothing? The guys time and money is worth just as much as just the womans time.
Yes you're allowed to voice your opinion of course, I have no objection to that
What truly ticked me off was actually more your advice on how to approach a set of girls in class. By giving empty compliments? Come on xD Talk about undermining the entire thread's ideals. I'm not saying it's wrong or that it doesn't work, the guy might succeed in that way, but it goes against pretty much everything the regulars in here try to teach guys about becoming men in a deeper sense of the word. Same thing with the guy who believes that paying for dates is part of "being a man". I've heard girls say the same thing! It doesn't get more twisted than that in my opinion. We gotta stop teaching these things and fill people's heads with crap.
Sorry, I'm in a bad mood and have been all day. And getting rejected by five different girls for various reasons didn't really bring my mood back up :lol But I stand by my opinion. *Most guys* only talk to women in order to get something, usually sex. In many cases, that's the sole reason for going on a date as well. Or when guys buy girls drinks in order to like them.
That's paying for their affection, substituting personality and true manliness with the size of their wallet instead. Granted, it's not the girl who gets the money when you pay for a date, but I think the principle is sound anyway. You are spending money to keep someone around you in hopes that they will like and reward you for it down the road. And as Idde said, keeping things the way they are just because they supposed to be a certain is stupid and backwards. With such reasonings from both genders, we will never have true gender equality.
Though not a huge factor, this is part of my reluctance for paying for things. If you want to go out with me, you're here to go out with me.Ideally spending time with me should be enough to make it worthwhile. If that's not enough for you, well, that's too bad.
Its always interesting when young people start to discover that society does not conform to their worldview.
And this gets a wow from me. Perhaps there are different societies from the one you're used to? Perhaps certain aspects of society should be changed?
Holy shit she said yes. It's all set for Friday at 1pm. My first date in a looooooooooooooooong time. I don't know what to do or more importantly what not to do between now and then. Do I just not contact her between now and Friday or do I contact her on Thurs just as a reminder? Should I give her my phone number now or wait until after I meet her and just communicate through Tinder till then?
FUCK!
Awesome, good luck man, enjoy
Don't text, don't overthink. Just do it. Awesome that she said yes
I thought this thread was for people who needed help dating, not some fedora stuff.
"Fedora stuff" is directly related to dating. If you view yourself as worthwhile enough to have standards in regards to certain aspects, without becoming a misogynist asshole, that means you're confident enough. This doesn't mean paying on dates for everyone, this is just something I care about.
si.
I completely understand the points anarckitty was trying to make. even though I'd never expect the guy to pay I can see why you would assume that the person who invites you to do something is more likely to pay for it. you should never take it for granted though, but it's not irrational, same would be true the other way around (genders swapped)
Question, if you invite a friend of yours to go to the movies, is it implied then that you'll pay for his or her ticket?
You know, it really is quite simple. You see someone you're interested in and you make conversation. If they reciprocate then maybe you ask for a number or hell maybe even a date. If you manage to get a date then you dress nice, choose something fun to do and go do it. And to be honest, if your a guy you pay for the date.
If you want to change the world, by all means go ahead and do that but in the interim you may have lost the opportunity to be with the the woman/man that you want. Because like it or not most women have been raised t expect a gentleman to pay for the date or even the first couple of dates. She may even be cool with paying and like you in spite of not paying or going "Dutch" but chances are you just gave the potential relationship a hurdle to cross that it didn't need.
At the first bolded. Why? The answer is "just because." Aside from tradition, there are no reasons to pay for dates. And I could name several reasons why it should be different. And the second bolded: I'm not looking for anyone who would be so adamant about me paying for everything. And as I said, luckily, pretty much all of my dates so far expect to go Dutch. Perhaps because we're Dutch, that might have something to do with it
I have a date coming up next friday. I'll see how it goes, but I already have a hunch.
Why focus so hard on who pays? If you really want the company of someone fork over the fucking money lest you look like a stingy bastard.
Are you talking to guys or girls?
edit: just as a disclaimer: I don't normally care about this stuff too much, and it has never been a problem for me, since everyone here offered to pay for at least some stuff. And I'm not a stingy bastard. This is all just for the sake of discussion.
Also, you could just write something like "Hey, my dad gave me your email address and told me to contact you for some reason, isn't that super weird lol?" Because it is, and it's funny as well 
