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Bachelor Parties And The Women Who Hate Them

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Richiban

Member
Or, more specifically, the girlfriends who hate them.

We had a bachelor party for a good friend this past weekend, and before we all went out we all got a talking to from our respective girlfriends. Some of the lectures ranged from "be careful and don't get hurt" (this was from my girlfriend.) to "If you do anything stupid, I'll kill you dead" (This was from a friends girlfriend) to "You had better not be going to see strippers, and if you are, you're coming home." This was from a buddy's wife

What's a bachelor party without strippers, I mean, c'mon.

The evening started off with cheers and beers at a buddy's house, which got trashed, and suprisingly he seemed very ok with the fact that we destroyed some of his pots by playing pumpkin baseball in the kitchen. He even seemed ok with the fact that we threw eggs at the groom and dumped a bag of flour on him while he was showering the eggs off.

Finally it was time to go to the peelers when one of us came up with the bright idea of shaving mohawks into our heads.

3 of us did, and we all walked to the stippers where we were greeted by wary looks as 5 guys walked into the bar with charged mohawks.

Anyways, the next day, the reactions from the ladies were hilarious:

My girlfriend: "Damn, that looks funny, but hopefully your hair grows back quickly."

Buddy's girlfriend: "Are you fucking serious? Seriously, why the fucking fuck would you even think about doing something so stupid? I blame you (directed at me) Rich, seriously, how could you let him do something so dumb. You should have been the responsible one, I'm very disappointed. Fuck. You guys are so stupid."

Buddy's wife: "hahah...you look dumb. I don't care about the hair, but you said you weren't going to the strippers."

All I know is that I've got to be a seriously lucky man if my girlfriend is cool with the dumb stuff I do. (unless, and this is very likely, that she's storing her anger to let it go off on me at an ideterminate time. I fear for this moment.)

How cool are your girlfriends with regards to you doing dumb things?
 

shuri

Banned
Bachelor parties here usually involves going to the strippers and getting drunk, but thats it. No egging or trashing stuff around. Wtf is that stuff?
 

Richiban

Member
shuri said:
Bachelor parties here usually involves going to the strippers and getting drunk, but thats it. No egging or trashing stuff around. Wtf is that stuff?


Agreed...The next morning we all helped clean up and replaced anything that got damaged

Things got a little out of control, I would say.

It would have been worse if we hadn't taken responsibility for it, but we definately couldn't do that to a good pal.
 

Nerevar

they call me "Man Gravy".
Richiban said:
Buddy's girlfriend: "Are you fucking serious? Seriously, why the fucking fuck would you even think about doing something so stupid? I blame you (directed at me) Rich, seriously, how could you let him do something so dumb. You should have been the responsible one, I'm very disappointed. Fuck. You guys are so stupid."

:lol

sounds like my buddy. He just got married a few weeks ago and before he went to Vegas for his bachelor party his fiancee pulled his best friend aside and said to him "I'm holding you fucking responsible for everything that happens at this." It was hilarious.
 

mrmyth

Member
Had a buddy of mine breakup with his GF at another buddy's bachelor party.

We hired a stripper. Spent enough money to get one without canker sores and cottage cheese. We are kindly enjoying her services when there a knock at the door. Everybody invited to this hoedown is already at this hoedown. We ignore.

The knocks get louder. And harder. And faster. And angrier.

Fuck it, says I. I'm out of bills anyway. I open the door to buddy's GF looking like Ahnuld at the end of Total Recall with the bug eyes. Huffin' and puffin' like I was supposed to be scared. She barges past me right to buddy. Buddy has consumed enough alcohol to clean an engine block. Buddy has eyes glued to tasseled tittties.

"I told you you couldn't see the stripper!," screams GF. Buddy dumps beer on GF's head, drunkenly slurring something about, "go home." GF begins to pull on buddy. This is like Nighcrawler trying to push Juggernaut out of the way. Buddy finally notices her attempts at removing him from the premises and casually stiff-arms her to the floor. His eyes look like that cone at the beginning of the Twilight Zone, still glued to the titties. GF gets up and goes for the stipper, causing the titties to go away. Buddy blinks, his eyes go back to normal, then turn a weird sort of glowing red. He picks GF up by her collar and deposits her on the other side of the front door. It all happened so fast that I never got away from said door. I closed it on her startled face.

Buddy dated that stripper for 17 months. I think he still has one of the tassels.
 
unless, and this is very likely, that she's storing her anger to let it go off on me at an ideterminate time. I fear for this moment.)

You are a wise man to be suspect of this.

Your buddy with the wife sounds like 2 of my friends and their wives. Whats scary is that the 2 wives were as cool as your girlfriend when they were dating. They GREW into the surly, jealous hags they are now. Does that friend and his wife have children?
 
My girlfriend trusts me enough, so I don't worry. Besides, WHO THE FUCK shares stories from bachelor parties with their girlfriend/spouse? Those guys lose their man card immediately.

Your friend should cut his girlfriend loose, BTW. Any woman who is that demanding is not worth it in the long run. He must get his balls busted EVERY DAY.
 

Ristamar

Member
I can understand why a girl wouldn't want her drunk boyfriend gawking at strippers all night (or worse). It's a matter of understanding and respecting each others preferences and boundaries. Personally, I wouldn't be too fond of the idea of my girlfriend hanging all over a bunch of male strippers.

The mohawk thing is fucking hilarious, though.
 

J2 Cool

Member
Dude, it's a bachelor party. You have a whole lifetime of respecting each other's boundaries after that. Anyway, I know that back at my dad's bachelor party all his friends got some girls as a surpise for em. They were all ready suppposedly when my now mom decided she'd stop by and see how their party was as she was having hers. I mean, how is it a bachelor party with the wife there? Anyway, she stopped right before they let the strippers out and basically stopped everything on the spot. Seriously wrecked it. My dad's been the bitch ever since. He talked his way out by saying he had no idea about it and she was pissed at a lot of his friends
 

LaneMeyer

Member
ive only been to one b.party and it involved 2 lame ass strippers that wore expressions on their faces like they were trying to remember their grocery list in their head the entire night (if you can imagine what that looks like). at the end of their stupid topless routine they provided a "special" show for an extra $100 each which was actually worth about $4.99.

as far as mohawks, food fights, and indoor pumpkin baseball, im in extreme jealousy. YOU guys know how to party! :thumbup:

the best b.party prank ive heard of was getting the bachelor shitfaced until he passed out, stripping him to his underwear (including taking his wallet), and putting him on a train headed several states away :lol
 
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