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etiolate

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We all know this forum loves cheap ass games and we know this forum supports small devs struggling just to make it in this world. So without further a-dude..

I bring you the Phoenix Games Group, straight out of somewhere in Europe, yo.

They cater to all sorts of gamers, including the new growing girl gaming group:

girlzonebig.jpg

Yes, this game included 10 minigames! And a bonus one too! Plus who can put a price on floating heads? Well about 12.99.

furrytalesbig.jpg

Hellooooo wabbit! This one looks right up Sonarrat's alley.

Oh and this is demi's favorite game to play

And you may think they only make great cars, but little did you know they make great puzzlers too! That's right, it's..
buttsubushibig.jpg


Check out more high quality gaming bliss here
 
Every time I walk into a Target or a Big W in Australia, You see even WORSE "games" sitting in the PS2 chelf. I don't know who makes them, but from what I see they're almost EXACTLY the same, dodgy set of little games. They always show one level on the back as a puzzle you need to put together, and the back cover is EXACTLY the same for each game [it has some weird looking purple imp on it].

The artwork looks equivelant to those horrible Disney knock-off videos you see when one of their movies is based off a folk tale [Like Snow White and Hunchback]. The animation, if there is any, I'd have no idea, looks about as decent as those dodgy CD-i Legend of Zelda Games.

They're about $30AU. Blech.
 
extremesprint.jpg


"Extreme Sprint 3010 takes place in post-apocalyptic Earth. In 3010, a totalitarian government trying to hold the full power in its hands introduces the new violent Extreme Sprints. The player will have to complete 16 sprints in 16 different arenas created in 4 different worlds to become a winner. "

THAT TITLE AND THAT DESCRIPTION WERE FAR FUNNIER THAN ANYTHING I COULD EVEN WRITE IN JEST

edit: oh god etiolate, for a second I thought you actually worked there.
 
sonofthelionking.jpg

AHHHHH! CAN THEY DO THIS!?

mightymulanbig.jpg

AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!! HOW IS THIS LEGALLY POSSIBLE!

I find it sad that there are people in the world who are dumb enough to actually think these are Disney titles.
 
Sho Nuff said:
sonofthelionking.jpg

AHHHHH! CAN THEY DO THIS!?

mightymulanbig.jpg

AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!! HOW IS THIS LEGALLY POSSIBLE!

I find it sad that there are people in the world who are dumb enough to actually think these are Disney titles.
Click to expand...
Wow, it's like the bargain kid's VHS rack at Wal-Mart, with its ripoff Disney titles.
Only it's for the PS2!!!
 
Sho Nuff said:
sonofthelionking.jpg

AHHHHH! CAN THEY DO THIS!?

mightymulanbig.jpg

AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!! HOW IS THIS LEGALLY POSSIBLE!

I find it sad that there are people in the world who are dumb enough to actually think these are Disney titles.
Click to expand...

Mulan isn't a Disney copyrighted story. In terms of design though they have grounds to take action. Hampster Ball is pretty bad.
 
Every one one of there games is geared for 3 year old kids. Well, except Extreme Sprint... its to extreme for anyone under 7.

But these wouldn't be that bad for a 3 year old. Its just a cheap game to pass the time. At three years old, your kids gonna pay attention to these things for 20 mins or less, you wanna spend $60 a pop on "good" games for them? ;) Let 'em eat up these cheapies until they get old enough to appreciate "real" games.

I mean they have GOT to be cheap.. Phoenix Games bills themselves as the ONLY European "Super Budget" Publisher. SUPER BUDGET. Thats gotta make Greatest Hits look overpriced.
 
Oracle Dragon said:
But these wouldn't be that bad for a 3 year old. Its just a cheap game to pass the time. At three years old, your kids gonna pay attention to these things for 20 mins or less, you wanna spend $60 a pop on "good" games for them? ;) Let 'em eat up these cheapies until they get old enough to appreciate "real" games.
Click to expand...

Three year old kids should get some Lego and fucking like it.
 
My favorite incredibly hilarious budget game PR is for classic Freefall 3050 AD for the Nuon!

Falling at 150 mph without a parachute has never been so much fun!

It is the year 3050 A.D. Mankind has laid waste to the once beautiful planet called Earth and is forced to sneek accomodation elsewhere. Huge, sky-bound cities now dominate and environmentally controlled stratosphere. The increase in city population has also led to an increase in crime. Gangster syndicates are taking over and are forming a dark new order. There is only one hope for justice - an elite core of uncorruptible law enforcers to protect and to serve. They are our only hope. They are our only future...

You are Commander Alexander Menon of the Drop Corps. At your disposal is a state-of-the-art defense suit, equipped with parallel lasers, grenades, airbrakes and anti-grav boots; it is all you have to keep the peace.
 
animalsoccerworldbig.jpg


did he kick that monkey in the balls?

i see they made road race 3. where are road races 1 and 2?
 
sp0rsk said:
it appears the rhino is about to bone the both of them in a way they probably dont want to be boned
Click to expand...
But he is being fisted by the hippo! Edit: No, what am I saying, that's the warthog.
 
sp0rsk said:
animalsoccerworldbig.jpg


did he kick that monkey in the balls?

i see they made road race 3. where are road races 1 and 2?
Click to expand...

Some sort of animal orgy going on there.. WTF
 
herkulesbig.jpg


:lol What the heck is wrong with "Herkules"? And that green cyclops... :lol

So many of these are comedy gold! I thought these were all photoshops at first.
 
buttsubushibig.jpg


I like how a game with the word "Butt" prominently in its title features a totally gay looking Village People-esque construction worker on the front. :lol
 
Funniest thread in a long while :lol :lol :lol

But also very sad. I actually recall seeing Furry Tales in a store... :(
 
JackFrost2012 said:
My favorite incredibly hilarious budget game PR is for classic Freefall 3050 AD for the Nuon!

Falling at 150 mph without a parachute has never been so much fun!

It is the year 3050 A.D. Mankind has laid waste to the once beautiful planet called Earth and is forced to sneek accomodation elsewhere. Huge, sky-bound cities now dominate and environmentally controlled stratosphere. The increase in city population has also led to an increase in crime. Gangster syndicates are taking over and are forming a dark new order. There is only one hope for justice - an elite core of uncorruptible law enforcers to protect and to serve. They are our only hope. They are our only future...

You are Commander Alexander Menon of the Drop Corps. At your disposal is a state-of-the-art defense suit, equipped with parallel lasers, grenades, airbrakes and anti-grav boots; it is all you have to keep the peace.
Click to expand...

Haha, sounds like something I would have wrote when I was writing up my own videogame ideas when I was 9.
 
Wow, I can only imagine what the development house for these wonderful projects looks like. My bet is it consists soley of those two guys from the Westwood Game College commercial.

"And my mom said I'd never get ANYWHERE playing games....why mom, WHY, all I ever wanted was your love you stupid bitch <sobs uncontrollably and proceeds to make Furry Tales 2: Down The Rabbit Hole>.
 
tedtropy said:
Wow, I can only imagine what the development house for these wonderful projects looks like. My bet is it consists soley of those two guys from the Westwood Game College commercial.
Click to expand...

"Almost done Furry Tales!"

"WELL MAKE SURE YOU TIGHTEN UP THE GRAPHICS ON LEVEL THREE"
 
How come those are legal!? Disney should sue. This is hilarious, we need a gaf review of those games!

and the scary thing is.. how come.. Sony of Europe is approving?
 
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