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Hold onto your dicks; erection spider loose in supermarket

Lunarorbit

Gold Member

Spider Capable of Causing Permanent Erections Shuts Down Entire Supermarket​



An Austrian supermarket has been temporarily shut down after one of the world's most dangerous spiders was discovered in a box of bananas.

The Brazilian Wandering Spider, which potentially roamed the aisles of a supermarket owned by the Rewe Retail Group in a town 45 miles west of Vienna, was spotted, according to the Daily Mail.

A bizarre side effect of this spider's bites is its ability to cause painful, hours-long erections. The impact is so dramatic that some scientists have studied the arachnid as part of research for impotence treatments like Viagra.

"The erection is a side effect that everybody who gets stung by this spider will experience along with the pain and discomfort," researcher Romulo Leite told
Live Science.

image


In the article it says it was hiding in a box of bananas so it definitely has a type. Plus the erection isn't permanent; whoever copy edited this wanted a splashy headline cause it ONLY lasts a few hours.

So we have the superconductors, aliens, new cancer fighting research, tears of the kingdom/starfield /bg3, and now a boner inducing spider.

2023 keeps giving
 
Imagining the hijinks one could participate in if they had the power give an unsuspecting person a rock hard erection makes me chuckle.
 
I'm familiar with this species as it's one of the multiple ones referred to as "banana spiders" and is fairly dangerous. Their venom is said to be necrotic and is studied by medical professionals in Brazil. Though I'll admit, I was expecting it to be bigger as the photos I've seen make it out to be humungous.

 

Dacvak

No one shall be brought before our LORD David Bowie without the true and secret knowledge of the Photoshop. For in that time, so shall He appear.
And they say bananas aren’t an aphrodisiac
 

jason10mm

Gold Member
A spider bite that causes a painful hours long erection is like the plot to half the "step-cest" films out there.

IT'S TRUE?!?!?!?
 
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