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[andthebeatgoeson]

Bacteria Vaginosis. It's diagnosed by, now get this, the 'whiff' test. :lol :lol :lol

http://my.webmd.com/hw/womens_conditions/hw6026.asp
Search for 'whiff test'.

As your friendly neighborhood doctor, I confirm that the bitch is positive.

"So then, he fucks her anyway. Without a condom. Hahah...and then tells her he loves her."
"What a fuckin douche!"
"LOL...she needs to douche"



JK, shadow. But that was my favorite story of the year. I think we've all been there. Telling a girl 'I love you' when you're Herman's Head voices are like, 'Nooooo, don't do it.'

 

[mrroboto]

:lol Awesome, stupid stuff. But can someone explain me what exactly she smelled like? I don't understand.

alright, lemme take a wild stab at what our poor hero's nose got a whiff of:

take a very strong mixture of all the following and imagine the smell:

sweat....lot's of sweat. urine. ass. more like dirty ass. probably shit ass. then we have the vaginal secretions that are in a world all their own.

so sweat, urine, shit ass and nasty vaginal secretion smells all together. oh hell, throw in a few dead gerbils, one cat, half eaten hot dog and broken dildo.

now most clean women only have a slight, slight scent and it's really not bad at all.

any woman's crotch that makes your nose hair run away and your dick shrivel up into your stomach...i'd avoid that. k?

 

[FrenchMovieTheme]

shadowred isn't white dudes

 

[Gruco]

ShadowRed, I seriously think you have a lucrative future to look forward to as an abstinence only sex-ed guest lecturer.

 

[Date of Lies]

Wow, that's a misfortunate story. Some apples are rotten in the inside. I usually associate beauty with good hygiene. I only like women with good hygiene, most atleast SEEM like they have it.

 

[Ecrofirt]

When I started reading this I kept thinking he was gonig to take her for a steak dinner or something, and she'd go batshit crazy on him. Then he got to the taco part, and I REALLY thought that's what would happen.

Turns out ShadowRed is just a douche, or moreover, he needs to get his pregnant indian bride one.

 

[Date of Lies]

Turns out ShadowRed is just a douche, or moreover, he needs to get his pregnant indian bride one.

:lol

 

[Loki]

From Skinnyrattler's link:

Infections that can cause vaginitis are common and include:

Yeast infection. A vaginal yeast infection is usually caused by a type of yeast called Candida albicans. A yeast infection is also called a candida infection, or candidiasis. A vaginal yeast infection often causes itching and a white, lumpy discharge that looks similar to cottage cheese; it also causes pain with sexual intercourse.

And here ShadowRed thought she was screaming because of his sexual prowess...

 

[Maxwell House]

That was an entertaining story but I have to say, I don't believe a word of it is true.

 

[Doc Savage]

You liked her for an obvious reason now you are in a position to totally humiliate this girl. Rotten crotch sucks but the situation needs to be handled with kid gloves. Maybe you can play bath-time together If she didn't have this odor problem would you still want to be with her? If the answer is yes then find a way to fix it. Tough problem to have but I am sure there is a way, ask your friends girlfriend that was sniffing your crotch what she would want done.

 

[andthebeatgoeson]

For added comedy, I wonder how many people started stroking themselves when it got kinda kinky? I'll admit it. I like erotic literature. Then you did a excellent job at painting the smelly picture and I lost all interest. I give it a B+.

You should submit it here under "stank broads and the men who love them"

 

[mj1108]

Think of your poor kid in there....9 months of living with whatever died up there. It'll probably come out smelling just as nasty. You could name the kid "Stank". Then when people say "Why did you name your child Stank?" just tell them you named it after it's mother.

 

[Kabuki Waq]

For added comedy, I wonder how many people started stroking themselves when it got kinda kinky? I'll admit it. I like erotic literature. Then you did a excellent job at painting the smelly picture and I lost all interest. I give it a B+.

You should submit it here under "stank broads and the men who love them"

WHAT
THE
FUCK?!



:lol :lol :lol :lol

 

[Pochacco]

Anyone else getting turned on by the fact that skinnyrattler is getting turned on over ShadowRed's snatch 'n sniff story?
Good, me neither.

 

[JayFro]

Jesus that's some of the funniest shit I've ever read. Rarely do I ever start laughing when reading something on this forum, but damn brotha!


I remember one time in my younger days I was with this really hot girl who I had pretty much always dreamed of boning. Finally I ended up dumping my girl and going out with this chick who seemed to have a little problem downstairs. She was soooo wet that it would literally go through her panties and jeans and you could feel severe moisture on the outside of her jeans. A couple times she left rather large snail trails on my shorts and it took me two days to wash the odor off of my fingers. Needless to say I never went down on her because it scared the shit out of me, but I've never really come up against the foul foul odor you describe. I've dealt with some strong stuff, but the inhaling and exhaling just had me rolling dude, that didn't sound very fun.


Best story I've read on these forums in forever. Must cut paste.......must send to my friends. They will all be rolling on the ground I'm sure.


JayFro

 

[UtadaBarkley]

Either way you better tell her something before the doctor/nurses faint while delivering your baby.

:lol :lol :lol That's by far the funniest thing I've read all month. :lol :lol :lol

 

[ElyrionX]

Dude, unless you're sure it's her natural body odour, I think what you smelled was just a scent that some Indians like to put on. It's a culture thing. It has stuff like coconut milk in it and such and yeah, it stinks. REAL BAD. You need to talk to her, man. If the stink is really due to what I said, then perhaps you can get her to stop using it when she's with you. Most Indians don't realize that most non-Indians can't stand the smell of that shit that they use.

 

[warhead]

:lol thanks for making me start this morning with a laugh.
That chick in bend it like Beckham is damn hot though.

 

[J2 Cool]

:lol :lol The best part is when you were trapped on the bed, while she said you are her's now, and she is yours. The mother escape is so damn temporary :lol You better leave state. Forget her, and your mother. What do you do when you meet a skunk? You back off. It's only natural.

Oh, and what the fuck is up with hot chicks wanting to bang your brother through you? There's a nice chunk o man meat right here crazy bitch.

 

[sly]

so sweat, urine, shit ass and nasty vaginal secretion smells all together. oh hell, throw in a few dead gerbils, one cat, half eaten hot dog and broken dildo.

:lol :lol :lol

She was soooo wet that it would literally go through her panties and jeans and you could feel severe moisture on the outside of her jeans. A couple times she left rather large snail trails on my shorts and it took me two days to wash the odor off of my fingers.

:lol :lol :lol


This is the best thread ever! :lol

 

[aoi tsuki]

For added comedy, I wonder how many people started stroking themselves when it got kinda kinky? I'll admit it. I like erotic literature. Then you did a excellent job at painting the smelly picture and I lost all interest. I give it a B+.

You should submit it here under "stank broads and the men who love them"

Just when i think i'm the Captain of Kink amongst GAFers, i'm proven wrong. You into scatplay too? :lol

Needless to say I never went down on her because it scared the shit out of me, but I've never really come up against the foul foul odor you describe.

But you're older now, and you would, right? Nothing like a nice warm stream of lovin' from the fish pie oven. Just don't get it in your eyes. ^_-

 

[aku:jiki]

fish pie oven

I was going to post that your post in the kissing thread was the hottest I've seen (but I got lazy), and now this is the un-hottest post I've seen. You are a complicated man.

 

[JayFro]

Just when i think i'm the Captain of Kink amongst GAFers, i'm proven wrong. You into scatplay too? :lol


But you're older now, and you would, right? Nothing like a nice warm stream of lovin' from the fish pie oven. Just don't get it in your eyes. ^_-

I'm older and wiser, and the wiser part of me says bring a snorkel next time.

 

[aoi tsuki]

I was going to post that your post in the kissing thread was the hottest I've seen (but I got lazy), and now this is the un-hottest post I've seen. You are a complicated man.

Casual conversation about sex =/= technique for kissing a woman

 

[pollo]

ever since i read this thread yesterday, all images in my head when i masturbate all go back to stank ass indian pussy due to your livid description. THANKS GUY!

if i can never masturbate again its going to be thanks to you.