Has anybody else gotten a sudden urge of diarrhea to where you are fine one minute, and the next you are a danger to your pants any nearby upholstery?
I ate at Subway this morning and then later was in my car about to park at a parking garage before suddenly out of nowhere I was clenching my pelvic floor muscles with all my might to keep the contents of my insides from leaking onto the car seat.
It was a long way by foot to the nearest public restroom and they'd all be full with other people there anyway (I hate crapping in public restrooms, whether it's me or someone else) so I figured my best bet was just to stay seated and drive back home. It was only about 1-2 miles away, so my goal was to just stay as still as possible and fight the pressure building up until I was safe in my bathroom.
But leaving that parking garage, waiting for the slow cars in front of me, waiting for pedestrians to cross the street, waiting at red lights...waiting at left-turns....tested my patience and concentration unlike anything in my life. The hatred I felt for people hesitating even a slight fraction of a second on the road only fueled the fire in my bowels.
I was quivering, pressing as far down on the car seat as possible like when you apply pressure to a wound, sweating, turning up the radio really loudly to drown out my constant yelps of, "I'mgonnashitmyself". My vehicle was a roadside weapon and I was a ticking poo bomb ready to blow.
I ran over the grass and parked sideways in my driveway, fumbled for the key, threw open the door, and sprinted for the toilet when I finally docked safely at port in Brown Town.
It was a good 5 minutes of expulsion from my body before it was all over. I have angered the toilet gods and it will not flush. I just have a soup poo jour sitting in my bathroom waiting to drain >_>
I've never had this happen before. Sure, diarrhea, like when you go and it turns out to be diarrhea and you feel weird the rest of the day. But not like this. NOT LIKE THIS. HOW DOES THIS HAPPEN??
Tell me I'm not alone!
I ate at Subway this morning and then later was in my car about to park at a parking garage before suddenly out of nowhere I was clenching my pelvic floor muscles with all my might to keep the contents of my insides from leaking onto the car seat.
It was a long way by foot to the nearest public restroom and they'd all be full with other people there anyway (I hate crapping in public restrooms, whether it's me or someone else) so I figured my best bet was just to stay seated and drive back home. It was only about 1-2 miles away, so my goal was to just stay as still as possible and fight the pressure building up until I was safe in my bathroom.
But leaving that parking garage, waiting for the slow cars in front of me, waiting for pedestrians to cross the street, waiting at red lights...waiting at left-turns....tested my patience and concentration unlike anything in my life. The hatred I felt for people hesitating even a slight fraction of a second on the road only fueled the fire in my bowels.
I was quivering, pressing as far down on the car seat as possible like when you apply pressure to a wound, sweating, turning up the radio really loudly to drown out my constant yelps of, "I'mgonnashitmyself". My vehicle was a roadside weapon and I was a ticking poo bomb ready to blow.
I ran over the grass and parked sideways in my driveway, fumbled for the key, threw open the door, and sprinted for the toilet when I finally docked safely at port in Brown Town.
It was a good 5 minutes of expulsion from my body before it was all over. I have angered the toilet gods and it will not flush. I just have a soup poo jour sitting in my bathroom waiting to drain >_>
I've never had this happen before. Sure, diarrhea, like when you go and it turns out to be diarrhea and you feel weird the rest of the day. But not like this. NOT LIKE THIS. HOW DOES THIS HAPPEN??
Tell me I'm not alone!
