Maiden Voyage
Gold™ Member
Be sure to also let them know you don't believe in washing your hands.
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Rentahamster
Rodent Whores
That's what written on my door mat.
D
Deleted member 1159
Unconfirmed Member
Richard Packer
Member
What do you use to wipe?
haxan7
Banned
for a pee or a poop? let's be specific here
Richard Packer
Member
haxan7
Banned
i use your tongue for both
Richard Packer
Member
That's not the issue at hand.
Rentahamster
Rodent Whores
That is the issue at tongue, however.
D
Deleted member 1159
Unconfirmed Member
I've had lasik, AMA
Oh, my friend had a few rounds of laser surgery, but the docs are concerned there's a breakdown in the vitreous in their right eye, and want to do a couple of intravitreal injections. He's fine with needles in the arm, but worried about a needle in the eye.
Richard Packer
Member
It's never been an issue.
D
Deleted member 1159
Unconfirmed Member
They'll probably numb his eye and shine a light into it and he won't feel a thing or see it coming...in his eye.
Soodanim
Member
Rentahamster
Rodent Whores
#alltonguesmatter
Tschumi
Member
New tv arriving today, not going to reveal the brand and make because i imagine that's a rabbithole of conflicting advice from enthusiasts that'll just make me wish i could cancel my order lol, but it's 4k with HDR so I'm excited to see how my ps4 pro (hitherto played on a pretty chichai 1080p tv) games look.
Not sure what games to try first, i think i might go Control.. maybe Ace Combat 7... Or ff7R... Thoughts?
My girl was working on a house for some dude and we noticed that our tv is like a quarter the size of his, so yuss rare babe go-ahead for a very blokey investment!
Not sure what games to try first, i think i might go Control.. maybe Ace Combat 7... Or ff7R... Thoughts?
My girl was working on a house for some dude and we noticed that our tv is like a quarter the size of his, so yuss rare babe go-ahead for a very blokey investment!
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T8SC
Member
I hereby name your TV, Gerald.
Tschumi
Member
Ionian
Member
Had it done twice, first time was fine but they fucked up and my dominant eye changed.. More tests etc. Dr. was an absolute bastard the second time to me. (Wasn't being paid so didn't care).
Still have better eyesight but the eye gets lazy depending on time of day/what I'm looking at. Was my better eye too. They open the skin off the eye (Cornea), blast you and send you on your way with a mask. There was a queue.
The smell of burning eyeball is what I remember the most. Would still recommend though if you get a better person than that butcher. The mask is so weird and you need someone to make sure you get home safely, think Spider-man goggles. It fluctuates after the procedure for weeks/months even for me to this day.
I used to have to hail every bus to see the number when I was a teen. So that's nice. Can see them far away but havn't taken a bus in years.
Tell your mate to ask for a tranqulizler before having it done. It's not painful but they need to stay still for the procedure. The second time he gave me nothing, think he never wanted me returning, used to hound me on the phone to come back in when I told him. He lost his office anyway, I didn't see that coming!
Rentahamster
Rodent Whores
FF7R
nush
Member
Well, he really was a bad eye doctor then.
Ionian
Member
Font too small, can't read it.
Tschumi
Member
Gerald has arrived and looks deeeelicious. I'd turn for Gerald.
IbizaPocholo
NeoGAFs Kent Brockman
Peggies
Member
Now that I think of it, my cooking and cleaning arm is also my handjob arm but I've been neglecting to convey that information in a greeting to all guests who come over to my house for dinner. I'll do that from now on!
Rentahamster
Rodent Whores
When you present the cake at the end of the meal for dessert, write out that information in frosting on the cake.
How come you're off for a year?Good morning to you wonderful people on this wonderful tuesday - my last day at work for one year!
This is how I'll be leaving the office today.
Asking for a friend.
DragoonKain
Neighbours from Hell
My skin seems to break really easy these days. I don't know if that happens when you get older or if something can cause that in general, like lack of a certain nutrient. But I think I've bled more from skin gashes in the past few months that I have in the last 5 years combined.
A few months ago I was changing clothes and I banged my knuckle on the bureau and man it was gushing blood. I didn't bang it that hard either, but it tore like 3 layers deep. I still have a sort of scar from it, it took like 2 weeks to heal.
I was opening a water bottle and a tiny piece of plastic from the top cut into my finger and gave me this deep paper cut kinda thing that also took a couple weeks to heal.
I was scratching in my sleep I guess, I woke up one day a few weeks ago with blood on my bed sheets and a slice on my leg.
Yesterday I was kneeling to clean and knelt on a button and it dug into my knee and started bleeding a ton.
And today I was opening a plastic container of dumplings and it cracked when opening it and cut my finger and it was gushing blood.
Not sure if I've had a run of just really shitty luck or I'm doing something to make myself prone to these wounds.
A few months ago I was changing clothes and I banged my knuckle on the bureau and man it was gushing blood. I didn't bang it that hard either, but it tore like 3 layers deep. I still have a sort of scar from it, it took like 2 weeks to heal.
I was opening a water bottle and a tiny piece of plastic from the top cut into my finger and gave me this deep paper cut kinda thing that also took a couple weeks to heal.
I was scratching in my sleep I guess, I woke up one day a few weeks ago with blood on my bed sheets and a slice on my leg.
Yesterday I was kneeling to clean and knelt on a button and it dug into my knee and started bleeding a ton.
And today I was opening a plastic container of dumplings and it cracked when opening it and cut my finger and it was gushing blood.
Not sure if I've had a run of just really shitty luck or I'm doing something to make myself prone to these wounds.
nush
Member
Peggies
Member
Your friend would have to have himself knocked up.
Soodanim
Member
Youarealreadydead.jpg
How old are you? If you're 70 it makes sense. I remember my Nan fell in a hallway and her skin peeled back like a banana and she was covered in bruises. If you're 40, it's probably just early stages of that. The skin does get less supple over time.
Is there a weak skin disease we can convince you that you have?
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I really need to try and keep more up to date.
T8SC
Member
Turn what? Delicious like an apple-turnover? You telling me you want to EAT Gerald?
D
Deleted member 1159
Unconfirmed Member
Drinking enough water? Do you live in a dry climate where you may need moisturizer? Drinking too much alcohol?
I live in a pretty dry climate and especially in the winter I'd need to stay on top of hydration and using lotion sometimes, and when I used to drink it would be even more important because if your skin is a dry shriveled prune, it'll tear easier.
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Tschumi
Member
"I'd turn for him" is a reference to an old Australian comedian named Billy Birmingham who used to imitate sports commentators saying silly stuff, in one skit a cricket commentator is talking about his favourite player and says "it honestly wouldn't take much for me to turn for him that's how good i think he is", implying that he'd let that player sodomize him.
I thought it was apt. I'd let this tv bone me up the arse. In true metagaf style.
T8SC
Member
Ionian
Member
Was down for me anyway. Seems to be happening more often recently, maybe getting DDOS'd (again?).
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Reee getting reeevenge?
Ionian
Member
Could be anybody really with a bot network
Soodanim
Member
Tyler just tripped over the power cord and pulled the plug out, I wouldn't worry about it
Ionian
Member
Maiden Voyage
Gold™ Member
You know, I think I might leave my employer in Jan after I return from vacation. The problem is that I most likely need to wait until after bonus payout in April/May. But I think I'm mentally just done with it. So Jan or May-ish most likely.
Ionian
Member
I'd take the bonus first if it was me. I have no idea what you do though.
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