And now for...as the Heel Turns...
HHH: "Pop it seems that a lot of our wrestlers are realizing they can make more money and grow their brand easier in the indies..."
Vince McMahon: " What are those?"
HHH:" Er...they're small independent wrestling promotions..."
Vince McMahon: " Oh you mean territories! Those are gone. Haven't existed in ages."
HHH: " ...actually...."
Vince McMahon: " Cause I killed em all! Hah! Bought up all their workers and put em on my show! You got anyone getting too big you just buy up their best guy and brand em in your own company."
HHH: " Well we did that Vince. Dont you remember? We bought up a ton of them."
,
Vince McMahon:" We did...from the territories? Who'd we get?"
HHH: " Indies. They're called indies now."
Vince McMahon: " Well if they're from India make em a heel! Damned foreigners are only good for getting faces over anyhow."
HHH: " ..."
HHH: " Sir I think your confusing Indies with Indians."
Vince McMahon: " God Tatanka would've made such a great heel. I was gonna make him a drunk gimmick but we were still PG back then! Hah. Boy would he have gotten over during the Attitude Era. I'd have had him as a comedy sidekick trying to steal Stone Cold's beers out of the air!"
HHH: " Um..."
Vince McMahon: " Course problem is Steve was always way too good at catching those things. Wouldn't have worked..."
HHH: " Vince I'm saying we bought up a TON of the Independent talent already and they want to leave. They say they can make more money in the indie...er...territories now that things like tape archives are accessible world wide thanks to the internet. Youtube puts them over more than we are!"
Vince McMahon: " What!? How's that possible? We bought them! You can't get bigger than us! Once you're here your our guys! What happened to them that made them wanna leave?!"
HHH: " You made most of them enhancement talent Vince. When they got over more than the guys you were trying to put over you buried them in bad gimmicks or tag teams. Some you squashed. The win loss ratio here is almost always 50/50. No one ever has a real feud build and we sorta blow the entire premise of the stories from week to week with the matches running on televised shows instead of saving them for the pay per views. In general...you just keep wanting us to rush to the end of the story and then tell it again every week up till their match at PPV. By the time they get there the folks are bored with everything."
Vince McMahon: " Well hows it a payoff if the heels win though?! Just put all the belts on heels, and keep em there! Then folks will tune in to see them lose. Are any of them Foreigners?! Make em a heel! Throw the belt on em!"
HHH: " Vince we did that already. We made our own super foreigner heel. Problem is no one cares. He wasn't internet famous like the guys who want to leave and we hadn't used him in ages. You put a belt on him once he got juiced in the gym and folks got confused about an opening act guy being our supervillain champ."
Vince McMahon: " We got any other foreigners?"
HHH: " One but he's so over as a face we can't bury him. Thats not the point though. I'm saying our talent want to quit and by talent I mean all the indie darlings that have been pushing our own home grown guys!"
Vince McMahon:" Home grown? I thought we fired Xpac and RVD already!"
HHH: " Not that kind sir...Look. The talent want to leave. Hell when CJ Parker got over in Japan and Shinsuke Nakamura started getting losses to Corbin folks kind of started getting the idea that folks get over more outside of here. Even Cody is over in the indies now!"
Vince McMahon: " They wanna go to overseas to get over in the territories? Those indies are our competition? FINE! Then we'll make our OWN Indies! Hold tournaments and book nothing but indy folks. One for every kind of fed! I'm talking cruiserweights, womens leagues, and even british feds! Then book them as their own shows overseas. If you find a major fed just book all its folks and see if you can't convince them to defend OUR belt on THEIR show! Then their product will be more known for our title than their own! Hell see if they're stupid enough to let us buy up their tape archives so we can monetize off their stuff and leave them with no rights to their best works!"
HHH: " Thats...actually pretty clever. This might work. We could even book different kinds of styles than our main show! And then we can appeal to more audiences!"
Vince McMahon: " Oh no one gets over the main show! Thats where the giants play! Football players and bodybuilders look better on shirts and toys. No one wants to look up to a midget! Nooooo...you book those guys online only since thats where you say folks go to watch em. Run that shit after our stuff is over! That way we dont self compete for ratings. We'll just film it after that crowd of ours is good and hot after 3 hours of glistening muscle glory!"
HHH: " Wait run them after our..."
Vince McMahon: " mmmmmmmm muscles..."
HHH: "..."
HHH: "Vince are you rubbing my chest?"
Vince McMahon: " Ever think about a title run? You got the build. You could be a star young fella! Lemme just change the card for Wrestlemania..."
*and thus WWE Britain, 205 live, Mae Young Classic and more were created...*
