When the rest of the group arrives with Barrow Sagishi is glad that the dwarf needs little convincing to help them. It also seems that at least for this day that had done all they could. The others seem to think the same as Fhiess excuses himself in his usual insecure manner and Sagishi is at once reminded of the youth's earlier "performance". Sagishi ponders for a second.
"Fhiess, wait. I'll tag along if you don't mind."
Before Fhiess would even have a chance to answer, Sagishi has already jumped from his seat with so much vigor that he stumbles forward and bumps almost headfirst into the other, only a miracle preventing them to fall to the floor in a tangle of limbs.
"Oops, sorry for that."
Sagishi straightens himself up again before patting Fhiess on the back.
"Let's go then. shall we?"
They walk a few minutes in silence while Sagishi considers how to best approach the topic. After all he wanted the boy to
gain confidence, not run him down as to alienate him even more.
"Did I ever tell you that my mother was a musician?" he asks in his most innocent, I'm just making small talk voice.
"She could pick up any instrument, no matter how strange, and just make it sing. When I was little I liked to believe that she was able to talk to them. That there was a secret language of instruments that only she could hear and understand." He pauses for a moment and a pained smile of nostalgia plays around his face.
"The less mystical truth of course was a lifetime of practice and dedication and last but not least a simple and pure love for music. My mother lived for music. No. She
lived music. She was always singing or humming or whistling and even in such moments where none of these things were appropriate her whole body would sway, ever so slightly, to some melody only she could hear. She...," Sagishi breaks off as he realizes that he is straying away from the point he was going to make.
"Anyway...", he fumbles in his pockets and holds up Fhiess' ocarina. "My mother once told me that a musician and his instrument have a bond. That the musician has to honor this bond. That he has to treat the instrument...
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"...like a part of their own soul." Sagishi's mother held up the lute so that Sagishi could see the dangling parts of the torn string. "Is this how you would treat a part of your soul?"
Sagishi looked to the floor to escape his mother's piercing gaze. He was still too young to actually know the phrase, but nonetheless he had a profound feeling that he had fucked up bad. It was one of those times in which a child finds that they had stepped so far across the line so that, for a short time at least, they fear that this time, there really is no way back.
"What were you thinking?"
Sagishi realized that he couldn't just pretend not to hear his mother's question forever. Things might only get worse.
"I... I just wanted to play some music. For... for Tudo and the others... they... we..." he stopped. The betrayal, of how fast his friends had stormed out of the wagon when the door had flung open mid-performance and they had spotted Sagishi's mother, still stung. "We were just having fun," he finally finished meagerly with just a small hint of defiance.
"Playing music? Pah!" His mother shook her head. "What kind of music does, this, this?" Again the torn string dangled before Sagishi's nose. He thought it best not to give his mother a performance of "Zargos is smelly and has a fat belly..." as he had the feeling she wouldn't appreciate the humor quite as much as his friends had. Worse, she might tell the old grumpy fire-breather, and Sagishi still bore a patch of burned hair from the last time Zargos had caught them at some mischief. So he just went back to staring at the patch of floor before his feet.
An eternity seem to pass in silence before Sagishi finally heard an exasperated sigh and when he looked up some of the anger had vanished from his mothers expression. Eventually she put the lute on the table and walked over to a chest in the corner. Still afraid to say something wrong, Sagishi watched in silence as his mother opened the chest and after some rummaging around, retrieved a small lacquered box. She motioned Sagishi to come and sit with her at the table and looking for every opportunity to further appease her, he followed her command without hesitation.
His mother put the lacquered box between them and opened it. Inside lay what to Sagishi looked like a feather carved from some dark wood. Making sure that she had Sagishis full attention, his mother took up the feather and in a slow waving motion moved it before her lips while she blew ever so gently on it. A melody floated through the room. It was subtle and pleasant, like an ethereal flute but at the same time there was a rhythm to it that kept pulling Sagishi along.
His mother stopped and put the strange instrument down.
Long ago. In the very beginning of things. There was nothing but chaos and the gods. Each of the gods had a different idea of how to order should be brought to chaos and so they were locked in an eternal struggle, while all of existence remained in disorder.
The first god to grow tired of the constant fighting was Zumerasu so one day she turned away from the home of the gods and instead started walking along the random shores of chaos alone.
For a long time The great Mother simply walked on and on, taking enjoyment of simply being able to be a part of creation and for a time Zumerasu was able to forget the long war she had been fighting since the beginning of all, but soon her thoughts returned to the gods and how they were ever going to achieve order.
It was then when the wind carried a sound, unlike anything Zumerasu had ever heard to her. She stood transfixed as the melody spun around her and for a moment she saw creation as it should be. Saw the dance of existence, with its circles and pirouettes, its patterns, its flows and its rhythms.
The moment past and Zumerasu hurried to find the source of this wonderful sound. And in her eagerness it didnt take her long before she came to a hill. On its top stood the charred remains of a massive tree and on the biggest of the blackened branches perched a bright yellow bird. When it saw Zumerasu approaching it stopped its singing and inclined its head, fixating its black beady eye on the goddess.
Zumerasu fell to her knees tears of joy and excitement running down her face. Please! she begged of the bird. Please, teach me how you do that, so I can bring the knowledge of it to my people.
The bird considered her plea for a long time before it finally rustled its plumage and then leapt from its branch, taking to the sky above them. Zumerasu stretched out her hand in desperate gesture, but as the bird vanished in the distant chaos a single feather floated down and landed before her.
Zumerasu picked up the feather and as the wind caught its vanes the goddess could heard but the smallest hint of the beautiful music from before and she understood that the bird had granted her request after all.
Zumerasu remained under the charred tree for a long time, determined to master the secrets of the feather. She waved it through the air in changing patterns, strummed its vanes, blew on it. Moment for moment the feather presented a new layer which Zumerasu had to master until finally the melody that had first lured her to the tree whirled around her and Zumerasu was able to see the dance of creation once more.
Triumphant she returned to the other gods and she rose above their quarreling heads and without further announcement started playing with the feather. And the gods saw what she had seen and they understood what she had understood and so it was out of music that our universe was born and that order was brought to creation.
Sagishis mother stopped and held out the wooden feather to Sagishi, when she saw his wide eyes she laughed. This is not the real thing, little whirlwind. Its a childrens toy used to teach children the fundamentals of music. I got this from my father when I was a little younger than you are now
Her voice trailed of and at the mention of her father a dark cloud had crept over her features, but Sagishi knew better than to ask. He knew he wouldnt get an answer anyway. So he simply accepted the feather, holding it carefully between his fingers, afraid he might break it.
Sagishi waved the feather about and blew on it just as his mother had done before, but instead of the playful melody, a shrill trilling sound escaped from the instrument that instead of tingling, seemed to grind into his ears and brain.
When he looked at his mother questioningly, she simply raised an eyebrow. Zumerasu spent an eternity below the charred tree practicing, remember? Dont tell me you thought you could do it without practice?
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It became clear pretty quick that I had not the least talent for music. It was probably the biggest disappointment I ever inflicted on my mother.... besides running away, maybe,Sagishi continues his story, though the last sentence seems to be said more to himself than to Fhiess. She did however hide it well and never let it show. I was so thankful for that at the time, that I vowed to at least love and respect music as much if not more than my mother did, which is why
The ocarina he had still be holding up vanishes from his hand once more.
Ill be keeping this until you have learned how to love and respect music. So long
Sagishi now holds up a small wooden instrument, shaped like a feather, just like the one he had descripted in the story. He grins and waves it before his lips and an ear grinding, headache inducing wail, sounds through the street, turning the heads of the passersby.
Nope, still cant do it. He shrugs his shoulders, holding out the instrument to Fhiess. Here. Ill lend this to you. Practice with it. And when you can make it sing, like I remember it from my mother, Ill give you back your ocarina.
After a moment of thinking he adds. But you know. Maybe if you cant do it, you should ask yourself whether it is worth beating yourself up about failing at something you are not supposed to do, instead of looking to succeed at what you are truly good at. With that he pulls Fhiess sketchbook from his pocket and flips through it casually, nodding with appreciation, before returning it to his owner. Talent cant be forced.
((Sleight of hand to steal the ocarina and the sketchbook:
1D20+5 = [9]+5 = 14
