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[DESTROYA]

Dress up in a sexy dress and give him a show , maybe he’ll be sending you bitcoins.

 

[Setzer]

I got the same type of email a while back and replied saying, "I can't wait to see the video!".

 

[Stouffers]

You know you’ve made it when Ken Bone comments on your asshole on Reddit.

 

[Aggressive Carrot]

i want you guys to imagine just how gross my jerkoffs must look

I'll take this guy's word.

 

[Amory]

wasn't this a black mirror episode

 

[frostyxc]

How do I buy bitcoins???

While it's cute that your mom uses bitcoin, why publicize her beef with you?

 

[REE Machine]

Send them a picture of your cock and say you dont care

 

[Nikana]

Tell them you have a video of them masturbating with a gorilla.

 

[Macapala]

My roommate in military college caught me once. We locked eyes for a solid 5 seconds before he slowly backed out of the room. We never spoke of it, but he requested a room change the next semester.

Did you finish after he left?

 

[Stouffers]

Did you finish after he left?

 

[Stouffers]

wasn't this a black mirror episode

Yea, but the kid was a pedo.. and he killed a dude. And the mom was hot.

 

[ExpandKong]

Tell them you have a video of them masturbating with a gorilla.

Oh how the turns have tabled

 

[Insane Metal]

White theme ftw

 

[MasterCornholio]

He already did by posting it here.

"If you share this message..."

 

[Lionel Richie]

Imagine coding all that malware, just for

Guerrilla tape master race reporting in. Disney will never watch me masturbating.

 

[Frito_Pendejo]

Were you beating off while reading the email?

 

[T8SC]

Search for that bitcoin wallet and see how many transactions have taken place, people fall for this stuff all the time. They dont realise companies get compromised and data leaks. Hello Garmin & Canon.

 

[Can't decide]

I've had a couple of similar ones. I immediately knew it was a scam as I don't have a webcam and it was an old password, but it was a little worrying to see something I used was breached.

 

[nkarafo]

I remember someone getting messages via email or FB that he is being recorded. I thought it was funny because he was using an old desktop PC and monitor with no web cameras connected anywhere.

 

[Reptars Revenge]

So many people have to come to me for legal advice while also trying to avoid saying masturbating and porn. Then I’m like I got one for porn everyone did and they have a big sigh of relief

 

[Taxexemption]

Even if someone has video of me doing it with date and timestamps and video of what I'm looking at and they show me I'm gonna be like "it's a deepfake/fakenews" or if it's regarding something really benign like female solo I'll just be like "yeah that's me. You gotta problem with that? Also, stop looking at my dick you perverts"

 

[Mistershine.]

We can forgo the bitcoins if you like, just hit me up some gaf gold and we'll call it quits. I'm not sure the Internet is ready for such masturbatory magnificence anyway.

 

[TaySan]

I got a similar email before.

"I know who you are "posts password"

I just ignored it and changed all of my passwords.

 

[GeorgPrime]

just ask for the copy. If its good enough you may upload it to pornhub to earn some money with it.

 

[Roronoa Zoro]

Ok first thing you gotta do is send me your social security and credit card numbers

 

[Rival]

.

 

[ExpandKong]

Joke's on you scammer, my family already videotaped me masturbating in 1998 and they play it every year at Christmas to embarrass me

 

[Mobile Suit Gooch]

The man, the myth...and 3 others

 

[timeflais]

When are hackers going to learn how to use Grammar and spell?

Never, it is intentional.

 

[kretos]

 

[Kamina]

Reply to the mail saying your contacts already have your OnlyFans

 

[JSoup]

I got one of those e-mails a year ago. Even with that "this is a generated e-mail, so no contacting me" bit.
I replied telling the guy that the hacking skill must be magic as I don't (at the time) own a webcam.
He replies with nearly 10 paragraphs of technobabble.
I reply with "I thought you said this was a generated e-mail so you wouldn't get replies?"
Begin radio silence.

 

[poppabk]

Tik Tok shutdown can't have come soon enough for you, huh. Because we all know the entire video from *unzip* to clean-up will fit in the 60 second limit.

 

[SidViscous]

I had a wank to the video of you having a wank, want to go halfsies?

 

[DESTROYA]

I had a wank to the video of you having a wank, want to go halfsies?

No crossing swords

 

[Meowzers]

Someone tried to record me masturbating until they realised they couldn't record in 120fps.

 

[DESTROYA]

Someone tried to record me masturbating until they realised they couldn't record in 120fps.

Shouldn’t this be in the next gen thread ?

 

[Northeastmonk]

Check this site out: https://haveibeenpwned.com/

If you’ve ever been part of a Collection, go change your password. I work in IT. I have been around all kinds of professionals who have passwords so easy it would scare you.

 

[Armorian]

Someone tried to record me masturbating until they realised they couldn't record in 120fps.

Faps Per Second?

 

[Meowzers]

Faps Per Second?

Haha damn, soooo accurate.

 

[Richard Packer]

Whatever you were watching involved a Kangaroo didn't it? You sick bastard.

 

[Meowzers]

Shouldn’t this be in the next gen thread ?

My dick is measured by pixels not inches. So maybe you're right.

 

[GHG]

I got this email before.

I did nothing and can confirm my 12 inch monster did not break the internet.

The guy would have been doing me a favour, I might have been able to take an early retirement.

 

[Meowzers]

Whatever you were watching involved a Kangaroo didn't it? You sick bastard.

Makes sense though. He strokes everytime they hop. That's why he watches kangaroos in the wild

 

[Husky]

The website I work for got the same thing yesterday lmao

 

[Meowzers]

I got this email before.

I did nothing and can confirm my 12 inch monster did not break the internet.

The guy would have been doing me a favour, I might have been able to take an early retirement.

Legend says that if you spit on it, that the drool dries up before reaching the bottom. And that helicopter rescue missions are mostly needed to those that climb its summit.

 

[Glip_Glop]

haha, got a similar email 6 months ago. I have a dedicated “batin’ laptop with no webcam, if/when I get the urge. I’d say the most embarrassing thing anyone would find out about me is-all the vanilla shit I watch

 

[Stouffers]

Whatever you were watching involved a Kangaroo didn't it? You sick bastard.

Kangaroo Jack’n it?

 

[protonion]

just ask for the copy. If its good enough you may upload it to pornhub to earn some money with it.

??

These videos generate money?
I can produce infinite terabytes.

 

[GeorgPrime]

??

These videos generate money?
I can produce infinite terabytes.

Its like man who watch woman masturabate... just women who watch man masturbate