Since I've the space to use, I thought this might be fun:
If anybody thinks they can attempt to get away with submitting a support ticket with Valve claim ownership, I can only say that I've been using the same PayPal account and the same debit card for the past several years, and have many physical copies of games to submit as evidence...
...so, basically, don't be stupid. You won't get far. Be smart, though, and, well, you'll more or less never have to pay for another Steam game again.
Good luck.
Holy crap. If I win I'll put on a Saoirse avatar forever.