• Hey, guest user. Hope you're enjoying NeoGAF! Have you considered registering for an account? Come join us and add your take to the daily discourse.

The Official Shittiest Movies of 2004 Thread

Status
Not open for further replies.

COCKLES

being watched
We had one of these earlier in the year, but it's time to put down your votes for the stinkers of 2004.

Vote for three movies.

Mine:-

1. Van Helsing - Nuff said
2. Stepford Wives - as a hetro...the gay character in this was so stereotyped, even I was offended!
3. Dracula 3000 - OK this is without doubt the WORST movie ever made...but at least they had sense to keep it direct to DVD.
 

Jim Bowie

Member
The Grudge
The Passion of the Christ
Resident Evil: Apocalypse

Bad year for horror movies. On the upside, Saw and Ju-on were good and fucking amazing, respectively.
 

bionic77

Member
Not from this year, but I caught this really old movie with Sean Connery late on HBO the other night and it may be the worst movie I have ever seen. Literally, most porn movies have better production values and maybe even better acting. It was called 'Sword of the Valiant'. Amazingly, it was so horrible that I found it be mildly entertaining.
 

Tenguman

Member
After the Sunset was pretty shitty. Not the worst (salma's cleavage is the saving grace) but shitty none-the-less
 

Shiggy

Member
1. Traumschiff Surprise - Periode 1 (it wasn't funny...I expected much more)
2. Der WiXXer (it wasn't that funny...I expected more)
3. Van Helsing (it wasn't funny...oh it wasn't a comedy movie, but it was bad)
 

SteveMeister

Hang out with Steve.
Don't forget The Day After Tomorrow. And Garfield: The Movie was absolutely heinous (I saw it for free at a drive-in movie with a car club).
 

sc0la

Unconfirmed Member
Did Big Fish come out this year? *runs*

I am probably the only person that will mention this too =/
 

Dan

No longer boycotting the Wolfenstein franchise
scola said:
Did Big Fish come out this year? *runs*

I am probably the only person that will mention this too =/
Only because it technically came out in 2003. I thought it was pretty weak too.

1. Shrek 2 - lame, pointless plot and filled with stale pop culture gags
2. Spider-Man 2 - fails to succeed even without considering its faithfulness to the license; plot holes and inconsistencies galore; no firm foundation
3. Anchorman - just didn't work, unengaging characters, mess of a plot

Dishonorable mentions: The Day After Tomorrow, The Village, Secret Window, Club Dread, Troy.

Also, dozens of other films so shitty that I avoided at all costs and was never suckered into seeing with friends.
 
I submit Ocean's Twelve to the list.

Also, some of the movies you guys are listing are nowhere NEAR the worst movies of the year. Bad sure, but not the worst. You guys don't see enough movies.
 

DJ Sl4m

Member
No doubt about it, it seemed like the vast majority of movies released this past summer were rushed and could have used a lot of production tweaking and re-shooting.
 

Dan

No longer boycotting the Wolfenstein franchise
StrikerObi said:
Also, some of the movies you guys are listing are nowhere NEAR the worst movies of the year. Bad sure, but not the worst. You guys don't see enough shitty movies.
Clarified.

And this is bad... why?

The last thing this industry needs is people encouraging others to waste money on the worst movies of the year.
 

sc0la

Unconfirmed Member
StrikerObi said:
I submit Ocean's Twelve to the list.

Also, some of the movies you guys are listing are nowhere NEAR the worst movies of the year. Bad sure, but not the worst. You guys don't see enough movies.
no, we avoid the shit when we pay for tickets ;)

Thanks Dan I thought thatmight be the case, It wasn't the worst movie I hade seen, I just was not fond of it. I am surprised no one has mentioned the village yet to be honest with you.

edit: nm dan is a step ahead of me again.
 

demon

I don't mean to alarm you but you have dogs on your face
evil ways said:
2. Napoleon Dynamite
393794182carusoFUCKYOUUU.gif


This is a list of, I think, all the 2004 movies I've seen this year, from most to least liked:

Eternal Sunshine
Napoleon Dynamite
House of Sand and Fog
Hero
Spiderman 2
Club Dread (not great but I had a really good and memorable time seeing it)
Saved
Kill Bill Vol. 2
Butterfly Effect
Lady Killers
Secret Window (bordering, although the "You shtole my shtories" line was worth it at least)
----
Saw
King Arthur
Stepford Wives
The Grudge
The Day After Tomorrow

The bottom ones I suppose I could have done without, although I enjoyed every movie to some extent.

Oh shit I forgot about rentals from this year.........ahh fuck it.
 

fallout

Member
I haven't seen too many movies this year, but I did see Van Helsing while killing time before a Metallica concert.

Man was that a lame ass movie. There were about 7 of us sitting there and when the Romanian chick was swinging from the rope and gave that smug look while the camera zoomed in on her (this is near the end), our entire group flew their arms up in the air and collectively yelled at the retardness of it all.

Nobody seemed to complain about us disturbing the film.
 

sprsk

force push the doodoo rock
SERVED! SERVED! SERVED! SERVED! SERVED! SERVED! SERVED! SERVED! SERVED! SERVED! SERVED!
 

Shazapp

Member
Definitely Van Helsing. Not only disappointing, but just plain BAD.

Shrek 2 was also disappointing. I skipped it in the theaters but was looking forward to seeing the DVD. A big letdown.

Hellboy - disappointing, but not shitty.
Along Came Polly - shitty
The Ladykillers - definite shit
Passion of the Christ - even worse because it was manipulative shit.
 

Amir0x

Banned
Tenguman said:
After the Sunset was pretty shitty. Not the worst (salma's cleavage is the saving grace) but shitty none-the-less

At first I read that as "Before Sunset" and I was going to jump through the monitor and flex my geeky muscle! ;)

My pick goes to Alien vs. Predator. What a horrible, horrible movie...
 

ShyGuy

Member
All this and still no-one has mentioned CATWOMAN?????????????

Definitely the WORST movie I have seen all year.
 

Cosmic Bus

pristine morning snow
Sadly, I've seen [edit: almost; Dracula 3000? :lol] everything crappy mentioned thus far, but I'd like to doubly nominate Napolean Dynamite. Despite seeing this in a cheap second-run theater and on an extremely boring night, I felt like walking out on several occasions (but didn't, as I've never walked out of any movie, no matter how bad). It's just such a dull, unfunny flick and Napolean is one of the most infuriatingly annoying characters of all time.
 

Andy787

Banned
Resident Evil Apocolypse
I, Robot
King Arthur
Van Helsing
The Villiage
The Day After Tomorrow
Hellboy

And I thought Troy was pretty damned good. Certainly not all that true to history, but damned entertaining, and I liked the direction and music too.
 

Jak140

Member
ShyGuy said:
All this and still no-one has mentioned CATWOMAN?????????????

Definitely the WORST movie I have seen all year.
Shit man, I tried to wipe that abomination from my brain. I saw it for free and I still wanted money back for the time I wasted sitting through that cinematic abortion. Even my brother, who literally likes every movie he sees hated it, and he fucking liked the Master of Disguise. Thanks for bringing up painful memories man. And by thanks, I mean fuck you very much.
 

element

Member
VanHelsing
Oceans Twelve (ok, but highly disappointing. More like The Limey then Oceans Eleven)
The Village
Saw
 
I haven't seen any terrible movies so I guess I've done a good job avoiding the crap. Really though, after watching previews for stuff like Resident Evil: Apocalypse and Van Helsing and still going to those movies, you deserve to have 1-2 hours eliminated from your life. :)

Andy787 said:
And I thought Troy was pretty damned good. Certainly not all that true to history, but damned entertaining, and I liked the direction and music too.

I thought it was a decent flick too. I mean, it's not really one of my top 10 movies of all time or anything but compared to the absolute crap that came out, I'm surprised people would list Troy too.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top Bottom