Times you got revenge in your life: was it worth it or did you regret it?

DragoonKain

DragoonKain

Neighbours from Hell
How does everyone feel about getting revenge on someone who has wronged you or you perceive has wronged you? In your life when you've gotten revenge on someone generally has it been worth it or is it something you ended up regretting?

What is your philosophy on it? Do you always go for that sweet revenge if someone fucks you over? Are you one of the high road types who always brush it under the rug and move on with your life? Or is it a case by case basis and entirely dependent on who someone is that wrongs you and to the extremes they do so before you decide?

This should go without saying, but I'm talking within the confines of the law here. Can never be too clear these days.
 
Revenge is a toxic response to being wronged, it's not good for ones inner peace. I can't recall a time where I've plotted revenge against someone. If I remember I'll edit this post though.
 
My fault for trusting an untrustworthy person or leaving a vulnerability exposed. It's an evil person's nature to be evil. It's my responsibility to identify that and steer clear.
 
I cant go through life holding grudges......everyone changes over time so if someone throws you under a bus ..look at what caused it and learn from it and simply.....move on

Yesterday's enemies could be tomorrow's friends
 
I tend not to take revenge so much as take delight in seeing an antagonist suffer. It's the watching the body of your enemy float by thing.

I know this is not a commendable attitude
 
These responses actually bring a further question to my mind.

Where does "revenge" end and "justice" begin. If say someone steals money from you and you report them to the police and getting them arrested. Is that also not technically revenge? It's technically considered "justice" because they broke a law, but you are still pursuing action because you want them to pay for one reason or another.

If someone does something very cruel to you that isn't illegal is that no more worthy of revenge? Is legality always the precedent, and in that case are we mindlessly letting that arbitrarily guide our feelings on what is right and wrong and what requires someone to pay for what they did?

I'm just spitballing here.
 
Last edited:
Can't help it, I genuinely remember when people have been good to me so I'll look out for them in the future. But the flipside is I'll also remember if someones been an asshole. So I park that on a scorecard and only if there's an opportunity for redress, I might take it. But I'm not going to be holding on to a hot coal of revenge burning my hand for a long time or go out of my way for revenge. Most of the time those people just move out of your daily life anyway.

Yes, it's been worth it.
 
DragoonKain said:
These responses actually bring a further question to my mind.

Where does "revenge" end and "justice" begin. If say someone steals money from you and you report them to the police and getting them arrested. Is that also not technically revenge? It's technically considered "justice" because they broke a law, but you are still pursuing action because you want them to pay for one reason or another.

If someone does something very cruel to you that isn't illegal is that no more worthy of revenge? Is legality always the precedent, and in that case are we mindlessly letting that arbitrarily guide our feelings on what is right and wrong and what requires someone to pay for what they did?

I'm just spitballing here.
Click to expand...

I think justice turns to revenge when maliciousness becomes the driving factor of your decisions.
 
RdpB7Zp.gif
 
DragoonKain said:
These responses actually bring a further question to my mind.

Where does "revenge" end and "justice" begin. If say someone steals money from you and you report them to the police and getting them arrested. Is that also not technically revenge? It's technically considered "justice" because they broke a law, but you are still pursuing action because you want them to pay for one reason or another.

If someone does something very cruel to you that isn't illegal is that no more worthy of revenge? Is legality always the precedent, and in that case are we mindlessly letting that arbitrarily guide our feelings on what is right and wrong and what requires someone to pay for what they did?

I'm just spitballing here.
Click to expand...

Between passion and dispassion.

 
Revenge is in the Creator's hands. (Revenant reference :messenger_smiling_with_eyes:). Time is precious and life is short it flys by really fast you don't want to waste it holding onto grudges. Forgive and forget and let the justice system take control of the person in question if they did some illegal horrible stuff.
 
Definitely not worth it. I think about what happened every day and it honestly was a poor character choice I made. I was angry, incredibly hurt, and my world was falling apart and trying to hurt the person I loved more than life like I was at the time was stupid. I lost my boyfriend and bestfriend in that moment.

To be fair, he had done quite the damage prior to this and I'm still fixing myself. We both were equally in the wrong.
 
I went through evil thoughts of someone close doing something that fucked up my life for a bit. I realize just to keep them far away from me. Your inner peace of mind is soo important. I do think that getting revenge is worth is in the short term but can hurt you long term like, being on parlor or in the system.
 
About 15 years ago some friends and I lit up someone's house with about 700 paintballs in the middle of the night. The couple that lived there were complete assholes and did terrible shit to alot of people. It felt good at the time but now it just seems silly and I doubt it accomplished anything.
 
I also think it's an interesting dynamic that revenge is one of the most desired things in movies, TV, books. It is cheered or celebrated as this epic moment, and yes, much of that is fiction, but still, I think it shows it's human nature to be driven by it. Oddly in the real world I think when emotions get involved and a conscience or remorse that changes things.
 
I broke a leg in middle school and this asshole kid would intentionally stand in front of me and shit talk me on my way to one of my classes, moving left and right so I couldn't pass him for a few minutes.

This occurred 3 days in a row, on the third day, just as he started talking, I yanked one of my crutches up into his crotch so hard he lifted off the ground, then fell down screaming and crying.

Crutching my way over top of his convulsing body felt better then anything I've ever experienced since.
 
I have a strict "what goes around, comes around" policy. Like karma. If you're an asshole and bad things happen to you, good. If you're pleasant and your life improves, good. Either way, I enjoy the show.
 
If someone is always fucking with your shit then some light what goes around comes around response might be a valuable lesson for that person. People shouldn't be able to do whatever the fuck they want and just get away with it.
 
I'm not vengeful, but I find living a good life and success hurts your detractors more than any revenge you could impose upon them.
 
I've done petty things before to screw with people who have screwed with me, but the closest I can think about coming to revenge was with this one person I knew in high school. I don't even remember her name, but she was one of those 'too mature for this' kind of people, like the whole high school thing was just beneath her and was just an ass to anyone that wasn't on her 'level'. And she really didn't like me, for any number of reasons. Just made a point to be a pain anytime I ran into her, would wonder by the family store, which was way out of her way, just to be loudly snide, would spread relatively harmless but annoying rumors about my group of friends.....just a generally unpleasant person.

Jump ahead to just last year. I'm out shopping and ran into her. It had been 12 years since the last time we saw each other and she locks eyes with me and pulls that familiar sneer smile combo.
Me: *internal sigh* So, hows things?
Her: [long run on sentence about she's awesome and rich and such, I was just nodding "uh hu, nice" the whole time] So, hows your sad life?
Me: Been fine. I'm.....happy.
It was a strange moment cause I don't think I had fully appreciated how just generally content with life I was until that point.
But the look on her face, was.....I can't fully describe it. Like she couldn't believe what I had just said and her brain had blue screened on her. After a long moment of her just...standing there in some strange state of quantum indecision, I walked away.

Looking back, it both felt good to rub something like that in her face, but also rather not good. I hope she finds some actual happiness herself someday.
 
Last edited:
As someone who lives a discreet life, away from the drama of people, and compounded by the fact that I work solo, I haven't found myself in circumstances where I would be compelled to truly take revenge on someone. I don't want to waste time getting into arguments or clashing with immature or vicious people. That said, I wonder what I would be capable of if pushed too far. I know there is potential for evil in me and I hope I don't get in a situation where the temptation to let that evil loose is too strong to resist. While I cringe at vengeance stories in fiction, I don't think I'm above that burning desire to enact your personal justice.

The closest I came to taking vengeance, as far as I can remember, is screwing up an application for a public tender because I knew my boss wouldn't check it. Being the psychopath that he is, he deserved far worse.
 
I'm still plotting my revenge against some bullies I had at school. The worst part of having a very good memory is that you never forget some stuff and it's like it was yesterday -.-
 
Honestly, I've had thoughts like these with my ex because she smeared me. But it's neither worth the effort, nor would it help in any way. My feelings are mine and I'd rather spend the focus on improving myself rather than dragging her lower than where she currently is. If people think she's awesome and a great person, that is certainly not 'just' but in the end, it doesn't matter to me anymore.

Another more recent case is my previous team mate stealing the Unreal Engine workshop and the organizers that represent that community the workshop was for embracing that.
Thought about how to get back, chose the more mature route of offering a complimentary workshop that would focus on topics that the stolen workshop wouldn't. Turned out that the organizers gave the thief the topics I offered to do, too. Since then I just don't care about that community anymore whatsoever.
I might host a more 'private' workshop on my own or just focus on my work and let it speak for itself. It's a bummer because I like giving as much as I like taking, and if they don't want me to give, their loss.

In the end I think revenge is the equivalent of instant gratification in games. Feels good in the moment, but the consequences will be unsatisfactory in the long run.
 
Last edited:
I take things personal, so my revenge may not be immediate, and definitely not obvious, but I will hold a grudge forever until I feel satisfied. And I am careful that it doesn't go against myself, that's a part of the long term planning.
 
You have to have revenge if you have an ego, revenge on multiple platforms is perfect for building confidence as well as having fun, part of why people don't like revenge is because it kills your inner peace.
 
Justice belongs to fate, vengence belongs to man. It's an either/or proposition so choose wisely. Justice by it's nature of being considerate to many to compromise which many usually leaves everyone involved feeling unsatisfied, vengence at least satisfies whomever personifies it.
 
It takes a lot of energy to want revenge. You quickly grow grey hair worrying about it, and it can damage your health.

Everything has a price. But sometimes the price of payback is worth it.

Pro-tip: if you do get revenge, tell nobody. Talking about things might get you in trouble.
 
Last edited:
Ownage said:
It takes a lot of energy to want revenge. You quickly grow grey hair worrying about it, and it can damage your health.

Everything has a price. But sometimes the price of payback is worth it.
Click to expand...
Don't spend energy on it. Just be patient and wait for the time to come.

I'm in my mid 40s and I still have not gotten my brother back for lying about a Christmas present that I did not get when I was 14.
 
Revenge is just bad. The time and energy hating the other person, would have been better spent moving past the event and build up a better life for yourself.

Justice is tricky. Justice is when the guy gets caught doing the wrong. Punishment....well that's a whole other game.
 
DragoonKain said:
These responses actually bring a further question to my mind.

Where does "revenge" end and "justice" begin. If say someone steals money from you and you report them to the police and getting them arrested. Is that also not technically revenge? It's technically considered "justice" because they broke a law, but you are still pursuing action because you want them to pay for one reason or another.

If someone does something very cruel to you that isn't illegal is that no more worthy of revenge? Is legality always the precedent, and in that case are we mindlessly letting that arbitrarily guide our feelings on what is right and wrong and what requires someone to pay for what they did?

I'm just spitballing here.
Click to expand...

I think what really matters is whether or not someone's going to continue to hurt you or potentially hurt other people you care about, and what you can do about it. I've never felt the need to get back at someone for having wronged me, but I have felt the need to take steps so they can't continue to wrong me. And I might even feel some schadenfreude if they have something unfortunate happen to them due to their continued shit behavior, but the best use of energy is to move on with your life and focus on doing positive things. Focusing on causing harm makes you a cunt, even if the person you're focused on is a cunt too.
 
Although it's not good to hold onto grudges and seek revenge. There are times when it is justified and satisfying. This isn't Full House here folks. Doing the "right thing" doesn't always fix everything.
 
Swauny Jones said:
Although it's not good to hold onto grudges and seek revenge. There are times when it is justified and satisfying. This isn't Full House here folks. Doing the "right thing" doesn't always fix everything.
Click to expand...

The right thing isn't going out to harm someone who's become harmless because you have a grudge. It's only inviting more harm on yourself and escalation of the conflict. If they continue to be some kind of threat, the right thing is to mitigate that threat, but that's it.

I've got a stack of documentation sitting in my office at home ready for suing a former business partner who embezzled thousands of dollars into oblivion if he ever tries to fuck with me. In the meantime, taking any action on that front isn't likely to net me anything other than huge legal fees and stress and no reward except the satisfaction of seeing him get owned...to me that's not worth it. I've mitigated any threat and have moved on, which is what a clear headed adult should do
 
zeorhymer said:
Justice is tricky. Justice is when the guy gets caught doing the wrong. Punishment....well that's a whole other game.
Click to expand...

Everything has a price. Justice can be whatever you want it to be, but be prepared for the consequences. If whatever happens as a result is a reasonable price, then that's your business.
 
Last edited:
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

Gaf, tell me about times you got it wrong.
13
366
Blade2.0 replied
Standing desk worth it?
19
542
TransTrender replied
  • Poll
When you read a book and it has a song, do you sing it?
14
387
DGrayson replied
Is it worth it to get into the Cosmere? Mistborn or Stormlight Archives
13
1K
Lunarorbit replied
Is it me or is Instagram shit?
41
587
LimanimaPT replied
Top Bottom