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Would someone's bisexuality make them undateable?

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Pansexuals are black holes that will suck all soul mates into their event horizons, it must be stopped before we become a singularity

I don't know why, but I probably found this way more entertaining than I should have.
Probably because my sister - who is pan - is quite often asked if she's attracted to everything.

I cross my fingers for you both that it changes! There is of course always the option to move away but this your choice.

Thank you - yes, I'm hoping for a change in political discourse surrounding the subject. :)
 
I don't know why, but I probably found this way more entertaining than I should have.
Probably because my sister - who is pan - is quite often asked if she's attracted to everything.



Thank you - yes, I'm hoping for a change in political discourse surrounding the subject. :)

By everything, I at least hope that they don't literally mean everything

Please
 
By everything, I at least hope that they don't literally mean everything

Please

I saw that once. Someone saying they would be fine with a bisexual teaching their children but not a pansexual because they're attracted to everything. They named random items.

Other labels aren't parsed like this. They understand that the label refers to genders, not things. Heterosexuals are attracted to other things! Homosexuals are attracted to the same things! Bisexuals are attracted to two* things! etc



*Good time to point out bisexuality is the attraction to people of more than one gender, not just strictly two genders.
 
I'm (I guess) bi and a woman, which is to say I have sex with both genders, although I haven't dated a girl (but I've also only dated two guys). I don't really self-identify as bi, because I don't feel the need to disclose my sexuality unless I'm specifically asked, and honestly I don't consider it an integral part of my identity. When people do ask I generally go with "straight-ish" or "medium gay".

I usually get the most disapproval from gay women, who seem to really dislike women who are willing to sleep with men. I had one boyfriend who was delighted to see me get with other girls casually, and one who was absolutely not ok with me kissing other people of any gender. I was fine with either opinion— I'm pretty monogamous and the ability to sleep with both genders isn't very important to me.

Personally I'd be a little dubious about dating a bi guy, mostly because every single publicly bi dude I've ever met has ended up coming out as 100% gay eventually. I think the stigma about being a gay male is intense enough that even admitting you're bi usually means you're very interested in men. For girls, it's easy to have a "lesbian phase" or sleep with women only while drunk and still be considered straight by society. For men, admitting sleeping with men usually makes people unsure of you for life, so you have to want it pretty bad to go for it.

I totally get that it's a big double standard, and if I met a bi dude I was interested in, I would at least give them a chance. If they seemed significantly more into guys than girls though, I'd probably bail. I'm probably a bad person for feeling that way :/
 
Project more.
I suggest you take a long, hard look through my post history. I'm an active member of the LGBT community here on NeoGAF. I am, in fact, bisexual. And, yes, I have had women shoot me down because of my sexuality. So fuck off with this 'project more' bullshit. I'm not projecting anything, I'm simply putting forward the blunt, disgusting truth - people get turned on when it's two women getting it on, but are disgusted by two men doing the exact same thing. If you can accept one genders homosexuality, why can you not accept the others?
 
I suggest you take a long, hard look through my post history. I'm an active member of the LGBT community here on NeoGAF. I am, in fact, bisexual. And, yes, I have had women shoot me down because of my sexuality. So fuck off with this 'project more' bullshit. I'm not projecting anything, I'm simply putting forward the blunt, disgusting truth - people get turned on when it's two women getting it on, but are disgusted by two men doing the exact same thing. If you can accept one genders homosexuality, why can you not accept the others?

The OP asked a specific question and I answered it. You then came into this thread seemingly upset that I wouldn't care and took it personally.

If you wanted to get my opinion on why I think some women aren't into bisexual men, then just ask, but don't get shitty because I, as a heterosexual male, can't answer whether or not I would be into bisexual males if I was a female, and don't assume because of that, that I think gay guys are gross.

So yeah, you were projecting.
 
if the girl I'm dating is faithful and respectful of the fact that being in a relationship with me means exclusivity, I wouldn't care less

if she brought the argument that, since she's bisexual she somehow felt free to sleep with other women while dating me, relationship would be over
 
That's screwed up. I have no problem dating bisexual men. I can't think of a reason not to that isn't rooted in ignorance, or pettiness, or insecurity. In fact, sometimes I wish I were bisexual so I could appreciate more people sexually, and not just aesthetically.
 
Bisexuality is such a non-issue for me. I honestly think it's disheartening when people judge bisexuals so harshly and write them off as undateable because they might be sexual miscreants, or might be cheaters. They just can't seem to win on any side (gay or straight). Sure, there's probably some bisexual people that fit the bill, but they most likely fit the bill because they're [insert negative quality here], and not inherently because they're bisexual. Anybody could be a cheater or a sexual miscreant, regardless of sexual orientation.

I've never really thought about it, but do straight women think bisexual men are emasculated if they have sex with a man? That if they've taken it up the ass, they can't possibly please them because they're lesser/tainted men?

Being gay, I only have experience from that side of things. I know some gay men won't even consider bisexual men because they might cheat on them with women or they'll want to fuck anything that moves. Which is ridiculous to me because, uh... that could just as well be a gay man doing that to you (substitute man for woman, obviously). Which makes me wonder why exactly someone would focus so strongly on being cheated on with someone of the opposite sex. Is it a slight? Like you've failed to keep the bisexual on your side of the fence? That you weren't good enough of a [insert sexual orientation] and are more offended by thinking you made them hop the fence rather than being cheated on?

You're an asshole if you cheat. If you're bisexual and you cheat, you're just an asshole still. Cheating isn't exactly a unique thing to bisexuals, so it's bizarre to see it as a main reason to not want to date them. Some magical math probability for cheating won't increase because they can like more than one gender.

Eh. Anyway, dating a bi guy wouldn't be a problem for me.
 
People forget that this would/will happen: "I miss pussy/dick these days, you can't give it to me"

Again:

For some bi people, they do have a need for experiences with more than one gender. But for other bi people, the sexual companionship is a need that can be met by one person of one gender.
 
Every damn time people think bisexual means polyamory or just non-commited. When it just means you like multiple genders.

Like.. someone straight can marry someone, still like other people of the gender they married but not want to go after them. you throw in bi and people lose their damn minds and think once someone bi gets a woman, they want a man too, or vice versa
 
Lol, biphobia.

Come back telling me it's all rainbows when your SO refuses sex today because he/she feels like fucking something else.

I've lived it and witnessed it and it destroys relationships.
I can understand it however and, fortunately, it doesn't happen for everyone.
 
Every damn time people think bisexual means polyamory or just non-commited. When it just means you like multiple genders.

Like.. someone straight can marry someone, still like other people of the gender they married but not want to go after them. you throw in bi and people lose their damn minds and think once someone bi gets a woman, they want a man too, or vice versa
I heard there are some guys who are attracted to more than one woman. I wouldn't trust them as far as I could throw them tbh.

Lol, biphobia.

Come back telling me it's all rainbows when your SO refuses sex today because he/she feels like fucking something else.

I've lived it and witnessed it and it destroys relationships.
I can understand it however and, fortunately, it doesn't happen for everyone.
Harsh generalizations based on anecdotal evidence help nobody.
 
Lol, biphobia.

Come back telling me it's all rainbows when your SO refuses sex today because he/she feels like fucking something else.

I've lived it and witnessed it and it destroys relationships.
I can understand it however and, fortunately, it doesn't happen for everyone.

That sounds like you had relationship problems, not bisexual problems.
 
Look, people, let's not give Shahadan too hard a time - after all, they made a good point. All bisexual people are sexual deviants who must have constant sex with all genders simultaneously.

Seriously, Shahadan, pretty much everything valuable that can be said to you has been said to you about this. What you said is seriously problematic and prejudiced, and based on pretty weak anecdotes. What do you have to offer that suggests that bisexual people are flightier in relationships?
 
That sounds like you had relationship problems, not bisexual problems.

Yeah right, obviously. Witnessed it in two other couples who loved each other for years and were plagued by this sole problem that always came back to haunt them until it made them break up.

Have friends crying over you shoulder for years on both sides because they can't change it, and come back tell me bisexual cannot be a fucking problem.
 
Lol, biphobia.

Come back telling me it's all rainbows when your SO refuses sex today because he/she feels like fucking something else.

I've lived it and witnessed it and it destroys relationships.
I can understand it however and, fortunately, it doesn't happen for everyone.

Yes, biphobia is a real thing. Thank you for demonstrating it in this thread. A gold star for your dismissal of this real thing with a "lol".

So you've had a bad experience with a bisexual. Shame. Doesn't excuse your idiotic post.

If it doesn't happen to everyone then maybe you shouldn't be saying that it does?
 
Yeah right, obviously. Witnessed it in two other couples who loved each other for years and were plagued by this sole problem that always came back to haunt them until it made them break up.

Have friends crying over you shoulder for years on both sides because they can't change it, and come back tell me bisexual cannot be a fucking problem.
A whole TWO relationships?
 
Okay, I've not made generlization, just that it happens, lol. I'm out, crazy people

Again:

For some bi people, they do have a need for experiences with more than one gender. But for other bi people, the sexual companionship is a need that can be met by one person of one gender.

Is basically saying the same thing I did.
 
Okay then, I've written it's not a 100% rule but let's act like I said "all bisexuals are doomed and evil" and carry on.

What did you think would happen when you decided to post that?

You wrote something prejudiced based on limited personal experience and now you want to play the victim? It doesn't work like that.
 
Okay, I've not made generlization, just that it happens, lol. I'm out, crazy people

Essentially, your contribution to this thread is to post super ignorant comments, get upset because you have no valid response to establish why your posts have any value in this thread, and insult people in lieu of anything better.
 
I've never been with a bi person but I'd like to think it wouldn't make any difference to who I date. If someone's gonna leave/cheat/whatever I feel as if their sexuality wouldn't make a difference.
 
I've never met a bisexual person, other than those girls who kiss others when they're drunk and say "lol I'm bi. Hot right?"

I don't think I'd have a problem with it.
 
My (Ex-)GF (she suggested a timeout) is bisexual (?) and in the end she really got confused about what she really wants. It's a mess. Can she really love a man or does she want to be with women only. So it's more an inner struggle for her: "Am I homo- or bisexual?". That's what (maybe) destroyed our relationship. The whole situation sucks for both of us... and man, despite all of this I still love her. So maybe I'm the only one suffering, no idea.
 
if the girl I'm dating is faithful and respectful of the fact that being in a relationship with me means exclusivity, I wouldn't care less

if she brought the argument that, since she's bisexual she somehow felt free to sleep with other women while dating me, relationship would be over

Yeah that's my exact view on it, too.
 
I'm not projecting anything, I'm simply putting forward the blunt, disgusting truth - people get turned on when it's two women getting it on, but are disgusted by two men doing the exact same thing. If you can accept one genders homosexuality, why can you not accept the others?

I don't see the point you're trying to make. Watching two women getting it on cuts out nothing necessary for most heterosexual men. Watching two men getting it on however cuts out the quintessential part for arousal that is one or more women getting it on.

Doesn't mean we don't accept them or that we condemn them, not éven that it disgusts us. Some of us just don't like looking at others dicks.
 
It's a difficult subject for me. I'm pansexual and (recently became more) polyamourous, so I'm a walking target for a boatload of stigmas/stereotypes. At best, I get weird looks or some gross comments about threesomes.

Still, my close friends are more understanding, at least.
 
I'm pansexual and panromantic, and I've been faithful to one person for a decade and a half. I used to identify as bi before, but now that I know what pan is, I feel like it fits me more. We have a poly agreement in place, but neither of us has felt compelled to use it.

Like all relationships, it takes communication, trust, and more communication. Sure, I flirt with other people a ton, but my spouse has full disclosure (as in I tell them everything) and I respect their boundaries (as in if something feels weird/hurtful to them, I stop doing it). And that goes both ways.

It also depends on the people involved. Some just don't have the time and energy to treat multiple partners with the care and kindness each person deserves, so they become serial monogamists until they find someone who sticks.
 
I understand that human beings are naturally prone to insecurity but it's always struck me as a little strange that so many people see being with a bisexual person as having to "compete" with a wider array of people. If a girl doesn't want you anymore, she does not want you anymore. That's going to happen if she's interested in both genders or only one. You can't trick her into still wanting you just by there being fewer alternatives.

Why would anyone even want that? Wouldn't you want the person you're with to want to actually be with you?

To me it seems much more obvious that if you're dating someone who is bisexual, that means that they had an even wider range of options and yet they still wanted you. Why does the knowledge that you were the one out of so many make someone more insecure?
 
Of course it wouldn't matter, all identities are welcome in our polyamorous relationship for as little time or as long a time as is natural for the individuals involved.
 
I feel like I always say the same shit in these kinds of threads lol. Being rejected by straight people and gay people is the weirdest shit, and you'd think gay dudes would be better at being able to tear down stereotypes but nah.

I would never date a bisexual guy. Not because he is been with women, but because there will always be things that I just can't give him. This could lead to big problems in the future. You have to give the person a chance to explore what they want or it will end terribly. I can't deal with that sadly.

Your hypothetical bisexual boyfriend will probably leave you for being so insecure before they leave you because they're more interested in women.

Yeah right, obviously. Witnessed it in two other couples who loved each other for years and were plagued by this sole problem that always came back to haunt them until it made them break up.

Have friends crying over you shoulder for years on both sides because they can't change it, and come back tell me bisexual cannot be a fucking problem.

And yet my own relationships have lasted multiple years without issue regarding my own bisexuality. Incredible.
 
Being a bi 30 year old single male, I currently have two girls that are interested and me, and both of them have told me they have no issue with it whatsoever. Of course it is an issue for some people, but like with anything, it really just depends on the person.

I feel like I always say the same shit in these kinds of threads lol. Being rejected by straight people and gay people is the weirdest shit, and you'd think gay dudes would be better at being able to tear down stereotypes but nah.

Also, this is definitely a thing. I can understand being shunned by straight folk, but having experiencing those prejudices by fellow members of the letters community I've always found odd.
 
If bisexual porn has taught me anything is the guys have too much fun and the girl is sidelined

Someone please, please the girl too!
She's just there flicking away while the dudes are horning it up

Poor ladies ;(

Joking aside, society norms are shifting, I say a generation or two from now, things will even out and new prejudices will be taken up

It would be crazy down the line where heterosexuality is considered taboo...
 
If bisexual porn has taught me anything is the guys have too much fun and the girl is sidelined

Someone please, please the girl too!
She's just there flicking away while the dudes are horning it up

Poor ladies ;(

Joking aside, society norms are shifting, I say a generation or two from now, things will even out and new prejudices will be taken up

It would be crazy down the line where heterosexuality is considered taboo...

Bi porn never really hits that sweet spot for me. Either the two dudes focus on each other too much and leave the girl to herself, or they only focus on her and never interact with each other. There's like little/no high quality stuff where all three people are really into each other :( such a struggle :(
 
I'm secure enough with myself that I would be fine dating someone who is bisexual. I also don't expect that someone I date will suddenly not be attracted to other people. If they're going to up and suddenly leave me for someone else then that isn't a relationship I want to be in and that has absolutely nothing to do with their sexuality.
 
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