BigBooper
Member
I'm not talking about a threesome.
My buddy married this girl and they've been married 3 or 4 years now. She was very cagey from the start, not being fully transparent about her past or her family or the most important thing, her mental problems. He knew that she had some problems in the past, like she had to live with friends for a while because she was homeless for a bit after a previous relationship turned sour.
From the very first time I met her I told him I didn't think he should do this; that she was being too secretive and manipulative, but apparently he was in love enough to look past that. He is pretty gullible and also a very kind person, so he's easily taken advantage of. They got married, despite my discouragement, after about six months of dating.
For the first year to a year and a half or so things seemed to go relatively well. He was making pretty decent and she had a well paying job. Some things came up at his work, and she convinced him to quit and that he could work on hobbies while she earned well. More and more of her mental problems started showing. I don't think she's ever been to an actual psychologist because she goes to homeopaths and that type of crap. I think she has something like manic depressive, ocd, hypochondria, and bipolar. She has crazy mood swings and expects him to be at her beck and call during them. I'm sure that's the true reason she wanted him to leave his job, to increase his dependency on her and to control him. She started to develop these nonspecific ailments, and one of our other friends asked him if some of that could be psychosomatic and he didn't know.
She started to be very demanding with her employer and they put up with that for a few months and then she was let go. Even though they were both unemployed, she did not want him to go find another job. After a little while, she managed to find a job that let her work from home, and that's where they've stayed for pretty much two years. She got him connected with a work from home job, that doesn't pay much but at least it helps pay the bills, because she won't let him get a job where he has to go to work. She is completely terrified of catching covid or him bringing it home to her, that she keeps him homebound as much as she is. Her ailments, that have never been diagnosed, has affected her so much that she pretty much only stays in one room in their house and he has to bring stuff to her to survive. Now, she is in trouble with her new employer because she's been badmouthing them publicly and they want her to come to work sometimes, but she refuses to do anything other than work from home. It's not known yet whether she will lose her job or not. I don't know how long they can afford to live in their current house given all this.
Usually, I stay out of people's problems unless they ask for help and then I'll help out. I'm afraid he's kind of stuck in a downward spiral though and can't think straight because of being stuck in their house so much with her. She is a grade A manipulator and since he's so gullible, I'm afraid he is just stuck in misery unless someone can help pull him out.
What do you think? Should I butt in given that he's completely ignored my advice about her up to this point? I just don't want her to use my actions to turn him against me.
My buddy married this girl and they've been married 3 or 4 years now. She was very cagey from the start, not being fully transparent about her past or her family or the most important thing, her mental problems. He knew that she had some problems in the past, like she had to live with friends for a while because she was homeless for a bit after a previous relationship turned sour.
From the very first time I met her I told him I didn't think he should do this; that she was being too secretive and manipulative, but apparently he was in love enough to look past that. He is pretty gullible and also a very kind person, so he's easily taken advantage of. They got married, despite my discouragement, after about six months of dating.
For the first year to a year and a half or so things seemed to go relatively well. He was making pretty decent and she had a well paying job. Some things came up at his work, and she convinced him to quit and that he could work on hobbies while she earned well. More and more of her mental problems started showing. I don't think she's ever been to an actual psychologist because she goes to homeopaths and that type of crap. I think she has something like manic depressive, ocd, hypochondria, and bipolar. She has crazy mood swings and expects him to be at her beck and call during them. I'm sure that's the true reason she wanted him to leave his job, to increase his dependency on her and to control him. She started to develop these nonspecific ailments, and one of our other friends asked him if some of that could be psychosomatic and he didn't know.
She started to be very demanding with her employer and they put up with that for a few months and then she was let go. Even though they were both unemployed, she did not want him to go find another job. After a little while, she managed to find a job that let her work from home, and that's where they've stayed for pretty much two years. She got him connected with a work from home job, that doesn't pay much but at least it helps pay the bills, because she won't let him get a job where he has to go to work. She is completely terrified of catching covid or him bringing it home to her, that she keeps him homebound as much as she is. Her ailments, that have never been diagnosed, has affected her so much that she pretty much only stays in one room in their house and he has to bring stuff to her to survive. Now, she is in trouble with her new employer because she's been badmouthing them publicly and they want her to come to work sometimes, but she refuses to do anything other than work from home. It's not known yet whether she will lose her job or not. I don't know how long they can afford to live in their current house given all this.
Usually, I stay out of people's problems unless they ask for help and then I'll help out. I'm afraid he's kind of stuck in a downward spiral though and can't think straight because of being stuck in their house so much with her. She is a grade A manipulator and since he's so gullible, I'm afraid he is just stuck in misery unless someone can help pull him out.
What do you think? Should I butt in given that he's completely ignored my advice about her up to this point? I just don't want her to use my actions to turn him against me.
