Wtf America, turkey sucks

The flavor is in the gravy did you make any? I decided to make Gordon Ramsay's version this year for thanks and the gravy was so fucking tasty my family loved it. I'm going to be making it again for x-mas and new years I just love this freaking recipe.

 
Last edited:
You did a mish-mash of different techniques.

If you smoke the turkey, don't stuff it. Unless you want smoked bread (not sure about using sourdough either...). And the low smoking temperature isn't really safe for cooking the stuffing (unless you take the stuffing out and bring it to safe temperature). The stuffing would probably also block the smoke from penetrating.

The brine should be heavily spiced and salted. If you don't spice the food, don't be surprised if it's bland.

Gravy. It should come from browned drippings from the roasted bird and roasted carrots, onions, and celery. I'm not sure where your gravy came from if you smoked the bird. The gravy is what ties the meal together. Don't skimp or take shortcuts since the gravy is used to complete the stuffing, mashed potatoes, and turkey. It's every bit as important to the meal as tomato sauce is to pizza or dressing is to salad (any of this "well if you need gravy to make it taste good then it must suck" is bullshit...sauces are 100% integral to some dishes). I fortify the gravy with homemade stock to make sure there is enough gravy for leftovers.

I typically smoke a breast with a few onions stuffed inside and spatchcock a whole turkey for quick and even roasting in the oven.

It's a simple and humble meal. Very humble. Any shortcuts will be obvious in the final product.

The reason even people like me who love turkey don't have it more often? They weigh 15-25 pounds. At regular non-Thanksgiving prices, one bird could be $50 or more. Plus properly prepared side dishes take hours of labor.
 
Turkey done right can be really good but it's actually kinda difficult to get right. Kangaroo was delicious when I had it, so you got that at least.
 
Fried turkey is the only turkey i like... and even then it has to be dressed up with stuffing/gravy

Chicken tastes great many different ways: fried, roasted, poached, grilled, etc, etc...
 
matt404au said:
Turkey isn't really a thing in Australia but I know you cunts do it every year for Thanksgiving, and I'm a pretty keen cook, so I decided to give it a go. Got a 5 kg bird, brined it for 12 hours, stuffed it with a mix of blitzed up old sourdough, onion and sage, slid a stick of butter under the skin of each breast, smoked it for 5 hours while basting with melted butter every 45 minutes until the internal temp was 65C (149F), then gave it 20 mins in the oven at a high heat to crisp up. Final internal temp after resting was 75C (167F). I believe I did everything right -- the meat was relatively juicy and the skin was crispy but there was just no fucking flavour. What is the point of this stupid bird? Why not just eat chicken?
Click to expand...

FtHQcKj.jpg
 
Australian Turducken would be a turkey, stuffed inside of a dingo, stuffed inside of a kangaroo, stuffed inside of Olivia Newton John....slathered with vegemite and cooked on a barbie.
 
matt404au said:
Turkey isn't really a thing in Australia but I know you cunts do it every year for Thanksgiving, and I'm a pretty keen cook, so I decided to give it a go. Got a 5 kg bird, brined it for 12 hours, stuffed it with a mix of blitzed up old sourdough, onion and sage, slid a stick of butter under the skin of each breast, smoked it for 5 hours while basting with melted butter every 45 minutes until the internal temp was 65C (149F), then gave it 20 mins in the oven at a high heat to crisp up. Final internal temp after resting was 75C (167F). I believe I did everything right -- the meat was relatively juicy and the skin was crispy but there was just no fucking flavour. What is the point of this stupid bird? Why not just eat chicken?
Click to expand...

Agree, Donkey Meat is much better,.
 
matt404au said:
I just had an idea. What if I stuff a chicken inside a duck inside a turkey?
Click to expand...

I had something similar for Christmas last year - Guinea Fowl stuffed in a duck, stuffed in a turkey and wrapped in bacon, which was delicious. The shop had overstocked and needed to get rid of their stock, so I got this lot for less than £5.

Half way through prep:
nEmthFC.jpg
 
Can't decide said:
I had something similar for Christmas last year - Guinea Fowl stuffed in a duck, stuffed in a turkey and wrapped in bacon, which was delicious. The shop had overstocked and needed to get rid of their stock, so I got this lot for less than £5.

Half way through prep:
nEmthFC.jpg
Click to expand...

Sheeeeit son that looks good
 
Why did Turkey become a thing though?

Did the pilgrams not have chickens? WAs it an old Europe thing where Turkey's were just easier to maintain than chickens?

I remember reading that Chicken was looked at as low class during slavery times which is why it became a negative stereotypes against blacks. Is that why it became a thanksgiving staple?
 
I eat A LOT of ground turkey tbh

I don't even know if its dark or white meat, makes for good burgers though and usually cheaper than beef
 
SimpleKindofMan said:
You did a mish-mash of different techniques.

If you smoke the turkey, don't stuff it. Unless you want smoked bread (not sure about using sourdough either...). And the low smoking temperature isn't really safe for cooking the stuffing (unless you take the stuffing out and bring it to safe temperature). The stuffing would probably also block the smoke from penetrating.

The brine should be heavily spiced and salted. If you don't spice the food, don't be surprised if it's bland.

Gravy. It should come from browned drippings from the roasted bird and roasted carrots, onions, and celery. I'm not sure where your gravy came from if you smoked the bird. The gravy is what ties the meal together. Don't skimp or take shortcuts since the gravy is used to complete the stuffing, mashed potatoes, and turkey. It's every bit as important to the meal as tomato sauce is to pizza or dressing is to salad (any of this "well if you need gravy to make it taste good then it must suck" is bullshit...sauces are 100% integral to some dishes). I fortify the gravy with homemade stock to make sure there is enough gravy for leftovers.

I typically smoke a breast with a few onions stuffed inside and spatchcock a whole turkey for quick and even roasting in the oven.

It's a simple and humble meal. Very humble. Any shortcuts will be obvious in the final product.

The reason even people like me who love turkey don't have it more often? They weigh 15-25 pounds. At regular non-Thanksgiving prices, one bird could be $50 or more. Plus properly prepared side dishes take hours of labor.
Click to expand...

Smoke temp was higher than normal, around 150C. Stuffing actually turned out fine. Brine was Lane's signature brine, followed packet instructions for quantity. Method I got from some obese YouTube chef with a southern accent so I know it was good.

As I said earlier in the thread, the meat was cooked well. It was juicy and tender and the skin was crispy from blasting it in the oven for 20 mins at the end. The issue was the turkey flavour itself (or lack thereof). I'm still yet to see one benefit of turkey over chicken apart from the size.

Whenever I smoke, be it chicken, brisket, ribs, or this time turkey, I leave a pan underneath to catch the juices. I use a charcoal barrel smoker so there are two levels - the turkey went on top and the pan below. I also rested the turkey for 30 mins before the final oven blast so that I could collect extra juices. Gravy was made from a butter and flour roux, juices, good quality chicken stock, and a tablespoon of chicken bone broth concentrate. Gravy was not the problem.

People want to criticise the cooking method, gravy, whatever, but they aren't reading. These things weren't the issue - the flavour of the meat itself was.
 
If you every try again OP try and get a bronze instead of the bog standard white. Has a more gamey flavour. I love the things. I'm getting 3 for Christmas. 1 to eat on the day and 2 for the freezer.
 
As others have mentioned I had Kangeroo, in a Brazilian place in Spain.

Thing came out with blood all over it, asked the waiter could it be done more.

Then it came out as basically charcoal.

All at the same time some bloody magician was going about the restaurant disappearing peoples cutlery.

I was furious when he did it to me. Also the chef really did a number on me, tasted like burnt toast.

Edit: Also I love turkey
 
Last edited:
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

  • Locked
Traveling to Turkey
20
2K
NyMartin90 replied
  • Locked
Suicide bombing in Istanbul, Turkey
1
818
dakun replied
  • Locked
Russia suspects Turkey prepares to enter Syria
2
51
6K
NyMartin90 replied
  • Locked
Backpacking through Turkey and Egypt
4
836
Pedrito replied
  • Locked
Israeli defence minister accuses Turkey of buying IS oil
3
860
John Dunbar replied
Top Bottom