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Your favorite C Grade Straight to Video movie

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For acceptance the film must never have hit theaters and must not have a current famous movie star. Van Damme and Segal are allowed as they are no longer famous. Ex wrestlers and playboy playmates are not only allowed but encouraged.

My pick is APEX...

119957.jpg


Surprising good use of CG for this film taking into consideration it came out in 1995/96. It was put together as well as a STV movie could be if I remember correctly.
 

Teddman

Member
btrboyev said:
Bloodsport all the way. I can watch that movie anytime and not get sick of it.
Bloodsport was in theaters. It's a classic kickass flick though.

I vote for Urban Menace, starring Snoop Dogg, Big Pun, and Fat Joe. The latter two rappers play a pair of crime bosses, and their scenes are hilarious adlibbed stuff.
 
Teddman said:
I vote for Urban Menace, starring Snoop Dogg, Big Pun, and Fat Joe. The latter two rappers play a pair of crime bosses, and their scenes are hilarious adlibbed stuff.

I'm surprised the box cover for Urban Menace doesn't say "From the Director of Sword and the Sorcerer." I thought that guy was dead!
 

number386

Member
Mine is the punisher, the old one starring Dolph Lundgren as Frank Castle. The motorcycle scene was badass, check it out if you can it's really good.

t01056biaep.jpg
 

shuri

Banned
poster26xu.jpg

I am actually working on a epic 3000 words review as we speak of this movie. It was released to dvd under the name S.I.C.K which stand for SERIAL INSANE CLOWN KILLER.

Expect a review this week, filled with pictures and pics of hot (well kinda) babes! This is the shittiest movie I ever saw, but you can just feel that it was made by a bunch of friends who are really into horror movie, the thing looked like it was shot in the span of a week.

Hell, the dvd even had TRACKING LINES in the upper part of the screen. YES, VHS TRACKING LINES!@ :lol

Here's the final dvd cover that you can probably rent at your local video club..

sickcover4kn.jpg

This movie has it all; the horrible dialog, the off the chart random sex scenes (the main guy who probably is the guy who wrote the script manages to bang nearly all female characters in the movie, while being a total DORK), a 500 pounds killer clown, ultra violent gore (if just a bit low budget), shitload of continuity errors, and a plot twist that makes no sence!

This movie is pretty much THE WORST MOVIE I'VE EVER SEEN. But it's hard to shit on it, since you can just feel they had a blast doing it, and they knew it was going to be horrible.
 

hobbitx

Member
1197553kj.jpg

Friggin' love this movie! The kid that plays the Paperboy was brilliant, probably my favorite of these b movies.


Phoenix said:
Loved it! There's another sequel out too, good stuff.

Also since we're kinda on the subject, has anyone ever seen 2 G's and a Key? This used to come on cable alot a while back, loved it as well, there's alot of good stuff on blackstarz(forget the new name) at night, I could go on forever.

I vote for Urban Menace, starring Snoop Dogg, Big Pun, and Fat Joe. The latter two rappers play a pair of crime bosses, and their scenes are hilarious adlibbed stuff.
Have you ever seen that other one with Fat Joe and Mack 10 where they play rivals turned allies?
 
hobbitx said:
1197553kj.jpg

Friggin' love this movie! The kid that plays the Paperboy was brilliant, probably my favorite of these b movies.

:lol that movie was great. The kid was such a little bitch. I kept thinking to myself "WHY DOESN'T SOMEBODY JUST KICK HIS ASS?"
 
Actually, the killer snowman movie Jack Frost was really fucking cool (pun intended). They filmed the movie in what I'm sure was the height of summer. There is no real snow around at all and instead they use white sheets and spray on snow where they can and for music they do casio keyboard versions of your favorite public domain Christmas classics.

The thing is they knew it was as dumb as dirt so they pulled out some really clever Sam Raimi style camera work and lots of over the top silliness.

Other than the film itself, the best thing about the whole thing is the lenticular cover on the box...

6305199388.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg
 
Jack Frost had some funny moments, it was actually pretty well-written, and I enjoyed it a lot more than I thought I would. (Too bad what I've heard of and seen of the sequel sucks.)

My vote? (Was this in theaters?) Robot Jox. Given the time period, decent special effects that still hold up to a degree, if I remember correctly, the plot had a few nice interesting twists and facets that I didn't expect... Just a nice, decent mech movie.

peliculas.3747.IMAGEN1.jpg


You can catch it on cable now and then; it seems to air every once in a while. In fact... HBO, 6/25, 6 AM EST.
 

Particle Physicist

between a quark and a baryon
Kulock said:
My vote? (Was this in theaters?) Robot Jox. Given the time period, decent special effects that still hold up to a degree, if I remember correctly, the plot had a few nice interesting twists and facets that I didn't expect... Just a nice, decent mech movie.

peliculas.3747.IMAGEN1.jpg


You can catch it on cable now and then; it seems to air every once in a while. In fact... HBO, 6/25, 6 AM EST.


holy crap, i actually remember seeing that movie as a youngin.!
 

EviLore

Expansive Ellipses
Staff Member
The Hunted (1995)

hunted.jpg




No contest.

(Btw, this appears to have had a limited theatrical release, but imdb doesn't have specifics besides the $6m gross. Regardless, I'm still counting it as valid for this thread)


Lambert is a computer scientist who becomes hunted by NINJAS, and seeks the protection of a LUNATIC MODERN-DAY SWORD-CARRYING SAMURAI. The train sequence is great stuff (and bloody as all hell).
 

Funky Papa

FUNK-Y-PPA-4
Whoa whoa, I was looking for some Troll pics just to make fun of the movie when I found this

B0001AVZX0.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg

When Daniel, a crime scene investigator, discovers the truth behind a series of bizarre sex murders, no one believes him.

Creatures called Blood Gnomes from another dimension suddenly appear ripping their victims apart and feeding their bodies to The Mother of all Gnomes.

Enjoy the fun, sexy ride in this horrific story of blood thirsty creatures and survival.

Apparently it even features kinky sex with Melissa Pursley *and* Julie Strain! GAF, I hereby demand a trailer or at least some pics.
 
D

Deleted member 4784

Unconfirmed Member
Lexx. I remember finding a VHS of it in the $1 bin at Blockbuster. I was overjoyed when SciFi signed it on to do an actual series a year or two later. :lol

EDIT: What about Escape from New York? I think that was a straight to video also.
 

EviLore

Expansive Ellipses
Staff Member
Escape from New York:

Budget
$6,000,000 (estimated)

Opening Weekend
$4,162,000 (USA) (12 July 1981) (579 Screens)

Gross
$25,244,700 (USA)
 
D

Deleted member 4784

Unconfirmed Member
Aww. =\

Maybe Escape from LA? I'm probably pushing it, now. :lol
 

hobbitx

Member
explodet said:
129738.jpg


I've only seen the trailer and it's my favorite.
My god was this an awesomely good martial arts flick! I remember my dad renting this for me a long time ago, "Hey there's a karate movie I got you in that bag over there...." best day ever. :lol

t04608eap2s.jpg

Who remembers this classic? Bloodmoon had everything you could ever want an martial arts B movie, crazy psycho murdering the best martial artists in the city, RVD, and best of all, the most hilarious Eddie Murphy knockoff you'll ever see.
 

Rlan

Member
Jack Frost was sooooo bad. Were were just laughing at how stupid it was the whole way through, like that Bath Snowman Sex scene. :lol :lol :lol

We did the same thing to Collateral Damage when we saw that in the cinema. I'LL SHOW YOOOOO COLAATERAL DAMAAAAAAG!
 

borghe

Loves the Greater Toronto Area
Lion King 1 1/2.. really, I was amazed by how good it was..

edit - if we are talking about non-intentional direct to video movies, I would have to go with the underground copy of Roger Corman's Fantastic Four movie. Between not being able to hear what Doom said the entire movie, the laughable script, and the out of place actually decent special effects, that movie ranks up there.

and yes, the very first time I saw it was VHS in the early 90's (91, 92?)
 

Rlan

Member
Lion King 1 1/2 was pretty good. Although the "In Cinema" thing I could have done without.

Return of Jafar was great also.

Though this topic is more "What is the worst DTV crap you've laughed at" :p
 
Not sure if Robot Jox ever went into the theater, but I do remember seeing a trailer for it on TV back in the day. Then, it never hit the theaters where I lived and eventually I saw it on Video. I remember that I was underwhelmed.

Escape From LA was obviously released in Theaters as well.

For the record, I saw Bloodsport and The Hunted in the theater. :) Both are very fun films with lots of action. The Samurai in The Hunted is one bad-mother, and the scene on the train is killer.
 

Limedust

Member
Robot Jox was pretty cool way back in the day. I remember seeing it on HBO a fucking decade-plus ago.

Another favorite of mine is Nemesis (NOT THE SHITTY STAR TREK MOVIE), starring Olivier Gruner. The "falling through the hotel floors" scene that the recent shitty goth flick stole (... Underworld) ranks as one of the coolest stunts EVER FILMED. Actually, most of the action scenes in the movie rock hard, and the dialog is badass cheesy.
 

aku:jiki

Member
Limedust said:
Another favorite of mine is Nemesis (NOT THE SHITTY STAR TREK MOVIE), starring Olivier Gruner. The "falling through the hotel floors" scene that the recent shitty goth flick stole (... Underworld) ranks as one of the coolest stunts EVER FILMED. Actually, most of the action scenes in the movie rock hard, and the dialog is badass cheesy.
I bought that shit when I was a kid, and yes, it totally rocked. :D
Aren't there like about a gazillion sequels to it? I should check those out as well. :D
 
hobbitx said:
My god was this an awesomely good martial arts flick! I remember my dad renting this for me a long time ago, "Hey there's a karate movie I got you in that bag over there...." best day ever. :lol

t04608eap2s.jpg

Who remembers this classic? Bloodmoon had everything you could ever want an martial arts B movie, crazy psycho murdering the best martial artists in the city, RVD, and best of all, the most hilarious Eddie Murphy knockoff you'll ever see.
IAWTP
I was going to post Bloodmoon. It's surprisingly awesome and Gary Daniels is the lamest badass ever!
 

Limedust

Member
aku:jiki: Just a warning that the sequels all sucked and don't hold a candle to the original. This thread has reminded me that I should pick it up on DVD, as I have a used VHS that I bought for $1 at a flea market.
 

shuri

Banned
The problem is, the older stv stuff from the '80 up to the mid '95 was just hilariously bad and sometimes entertaining. The modern stv stuff is just vile
 

lexi

Banned
Movie about a heatwave of some sort. It was easily the worst movie I've ever seen, one of those Showtime produced pieces of shit inevitably with a main character nicknamed 'Lucky'.
 

DrEvil

not a medical professional
Cube - 16 screens
Cube 2: HyperCube - 500 screens (approx)
Cube Zero - 0 screens


/win.

-d
 

order#66

Member
does anybody know the name of the movie w/ rowdy pipper and andrew dice clay.
All I remeber is they hijack some hotel where a beuty contest is going on.It was awsome
 

themadcowtipper

Smells faintly of rancid stilton.
I can't think of the name of the movie, maybe someone can help. In the begining an angel or demon rapes a woman, then nobody can die, so the town is full of people with injuries,but dont die. It is a story of a girl trying to make it home to her boyfirend after shopping...
 
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