Support NeoGAF

[Ashes]

On the point of responses, I think the last thing I will say, and this may upset some, is that, I don't even intend to read every post in this thread.

Do we not have lives that we should be expected to read and respond to every post ever in this thread? OK. Maybe, some of us don't.

As always, seek professional help. Talk here. Vent here. Share thoughts, progress, even works of art. & seriously don't worry (see what I did there? ha ha); Conflict is expected.

 

[demon]

Therapy is a real crapshoot. I've been in therapy for years now with not a whole lot to show for it.

What kind of therapy, may I ask?

And does anyone here have experience with group therapy? What kinds of problems is that recommended for? The thought of it makes me pretty uncomfortable but sometimes I wonder if something like that would be good for me, with my problems connecting with and opening up to other people.

 

[Polydeuces]

Big test next week. I really need to do well somehow given that my prof is absolutely disorganized and lazy. His lecture notes are for his use; not for ours which is not helping.

 

[Windam]

Big test next week. I really need to do well somehow given that my prof is absolutely disorganized and lazy. His lecture notes are for his use; not for ours which is not helping.

Same here. Two midterms next week, within one day of each other. My crappy state as of late hasn't been helping, and I'm getting even worse now. Mood is continuing to drop.

 

[Yasae]

Anyone in here familiar with individuals clinically diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder? I strongly believe my ex-GF was/is suffering from it. I'm curious about examples of how individuals present with it in relationships. Just for comparison's sake.

I believe pretty strongly that she was, but sometimes I wonder if I'm just blowing things out of proportion. I'd be nice to hear some examples if anyone had any to share that I could compare against mine. Thanks!

You go first.

How many people here have given therapy a real try and feel they benefited from it? How many feel it was a waste? Just curious. I know therapy is probably my only hope and reclaiming my life but I keep putting it off.

Is there any way to stop obsessively thinking about how much you wish you could go back in time, be ten years younger, and do things differently? It's psychological torture but I can't stop.

I think I benefited from about..... 6 or 7 months of it. What it helped the most with is seeing things from other people's perspectives, seeing that their motives might not be what I feel they are.

It didn't help with any hard/difficult decisions. Those are always on you, though I also think too much change is advocated without any regard for a person's safety net. If you won't completely end up on the streets for years on end, then you can think about changing your direction. I don't mean pride, I mean money.

 

[White Man]

How many people here have given therapy a real try and feel they benefited from it? How many feel it was a waste? Just curious. I know therapy is probably my only hope and reclaiming my life but I keep putting it off.

Is there any way to stop obsessively thinking about how much you wish you could go back in time, be ten years younger, and do things differently? It's psychological torture but I can't stop.

I've benefitted from it, but a big part of it is finding the right therapist, which might take a few tries. You need to find someone you're comfortable with or else you won't really be able to fully open up.

 

[Mechanized]

Is there any way to stop obsessively thinking about how much you wish you could go back in time, be ten years younger, and do things differently? It's psychological torture but I can't stop.

You have to come to the realization that you can't change the past. What's done is done. The past cannot change, but you can. Are you going to let these thoughts dictate your present and future? I refuse that fate. Sometimes it's hard not to think about it, but instead of feeling bad, think of it as a time of reflection. Use what you've learned through your life to help you with today and tomorrow.

It is difficult to live in the moment, but that's what you should do. I deal with thoughts like this a lot. I think I might have OCD(yay self-diagnosis). But I can keep it under control with some simple tricks. I notice I start thinking these negative things if I just zone out in silence for a bit sometimes. So what I'll do is immediately start doing something else, either pop on some music, start looking at new websites, get up and walk around the house, anything to distract myself from thinking about whatever. Or flat out just say outloud, "this is stupid, stop thinking about this shit", put a smile on my face and think about something good instead, to distract myself from these negative thought patterns. And it fucking works. My mental health has improved vastly over the last year. Little tricks like this snap your brain out of these patterns. Another good one is meditative breathing. Which I thought was horseshit until I actually did it when someone said it relieved them of constant thinking about the past, future, what happened today, bad things, etc... You just sit up straight, close your eyes and breath in through your nose deeply and slowly, pay attention to the air moving through your nose and filling your lungs, actually feel it. And do the same as you breath out. Do that for a minute or two, your brain will keep trying to think of things to distract you but continue to focus on the air moving through you and those thoughts just fade away. Do this the next time you start thinking stupid shit. It works wonders. It forces you to live in the moment, to be fully aware of something outside your mind.

That's why exercise is so good for your mental health, your body is forced to live in the moment, it isn't there in stasis where your mind is free to take over, if you're pushing yourself in a workout you can't think of shit other then when will I be done this fucking workout oh jesus my legs are gonna fall off. lol

And then you feel great because you accomplished something. So that is less time to be thinking about stupid shit, instead you feel optimistic, proud of yourself, you don't have room in your mind for negative thoughts because there's so much good in there. I would highly recommend jogging. If you can't jog, walk. If you can't do either of those, lift. If you can't lift, try yoga, which can be pretty intense and is very good for mental health as well. Some of you guys may have serious issues that this advice can't do much for. I'm not a mental health expert, but I know this has helped me so I hope it can help someone here.

 

[Tapejara]

I was planning to give an update on my situation, but my last post was a month ago and I kept putting it off.

Things have been better for me. I talked to my psychiatrist about my sleep issues (spending too much time sleeping) and she asked if I wanted to reduce my clonazepam. I thought it was a good idea, so we reduced it marginally and I've seen improvements in my sleep schedule. Very few side effects, but I had my first panic attack in a while today. Over the years I've used Coca-Cola as a way of dealing with my anxiety. I guess you could say it's my alcohol. Drinking it makes me feel better and I take a bottle with me whenever I'm going somewhere. But today I thought I had run out and started freaking out internally. There was another bottle in the fridge, so I calmed down after a sip. It seems pretty silly to be so dependent on a soft drink when other people usually take comfort in more dangerous (for lack of a better word) substances.

All that aside, things have been better. I've been able to go visit friends, go for walks, go shopping, etc. While that's all well and good, I keep putting off actually tackling my phobia head on. I try to find other ways to improve my situation rather than exposing myself to what I fear the most. I've had my down days too; days where all of my actions seem futile and things will never improve. My situation has improved, but there are still plenty of obstacles in the way.

 

[Dorimukyasuto]

Hello friends,

My home life has gotten considerably worse, I've posted in this thread before but, just to clarify, I have MDD and GAD. I am also on an SSNRI.

Things have become unbearable in my home. It is to the point where I am attempting to move out as soon as possible. I have no income, other than some meager AdSense and MTurk earnings.

I am on an anti-depressant and I have to say that it definitely is working. I only temporarily feel down, despite my home life being much worse than it ever was. I am managing but today and yesterday I was just having a horrible time.

Like I said, I have no income.

However, I recently got a Discover card. I understand that it isn't a good idea to get into credit card debt, but I feel like my mental health is more important. I have talked with a few acquaintances and we were thinking about finding a place to rent.

Does anyone know if I could be eligible to receive some sort of government benefits? I'm in my last year of college and would willingly work if someone hired me but I don't have money to live off of until then.

As far as the anxiety goes, I'm having a terrible time with my appearance. Three days ago I thought I looked quite nice. I'm not terribly attractive but I felt like I looked alright. Today and yesterday I've been having intense anxiety mostly over my appearance.

The stress in my house is incredibly high. I currently live with my family and go to college full time. My parents don't get along and are at eachothers throats 24/7. I then become a target because I don't "contribute" enough. My family is low income, we struggle with money, and always have. I was thrown out of the house on Thursday because I ate hamburger meat that was meant for my mom (though no-one said not to eat it).


Not a day goes by where I am not reprimanded, ridiculed, and humiliated and to a lesser extent physically assaulted by one of my parents.

They tell me to move out, yet they refuse to help me financially. Just wanted to rant to my peeps here on GAF. You know, blowing off steam.

If anyone has any suggestions for how I can either receive some government benefits or tips for finding jobs. I am willing to do anything for work. I'll clean toilets if I have to.

I just need to move out of this house and get far away from my family as possible. My depression and anxiety will never improve if I continue to stay here.

Thanks Mental Health Gaf, have a good night/morning/day.

 

[walkman121]

God i'm messed up.

 

[MisterLuffy]

How many people here have given therapy a real try and feel they benefited from it? How many feel it was a waste? Just curious. I know therapy is probably my only hope and reclaiming my life but I keep putting it off.

Is there any way to stop obsessively thinking about how much you wish you could go back in time, be ten years younger, and do things differently? It's psychological torture but I can't stop.

I never been to therapy, but I had counseling at my university. Even though it didn't help me change nor motivated me to change, I just go there to blow some steam. I had no one to talk to about my problems. I'm like that too. Wishing that I could've done something differently or avoid things that could affect me in the future like 6-8 years ago. Or how I wished that I applied for jobs during high school.

 

[White Man]

I've done group therapy during 2 periods of my life and it just didn't work out for me. I just can't open up with strangers. It doesn't breed an environment of trust. You know there's an extremely high chance that one of the other pricks will end up telling one of their friends or loved ones if you say something really revealing and embarrassing.

 

[Femmeworth]

What kind of therapy, may I ask?

Talk therapy basically.

And does anyone here have experience with group therapy? What kinds of problems is that recommended for? The thought of it makes me pretty uncomfortable but sometimes I wonder if something like that would be good for me, with my problems connecting with and opening up to other people.

I was just in an intensive outpatient program back in March/April that was pretty much group therapy. It was a nice experience, but it didn't do a whole lot for me. You have to compete with other people to get attention. It didn't help me with opening up to other people too much. I think emotional volatility to some extent is necessary to get the most out of it.

 

[White Man]

So I saw my therapist today, and I have to tell someone about what's been happening to me so I have someone to talk to and someone to call if things start getting bad. Does anyone have any advice on how to bring up the subject of having serious hallucinations and delusions with someone that previously thought I only had emotional problems? I'm terrified they won't believe me or take me seriously. They know I was bad before, but I'm worse off now, and I'm afraid they'll think I'm pulling their leg or something.

 

[Buzzman]

So I saw my therapist today, and I have to tell someone about what's been happening to me so I have someone to talk to and someone to call if things start getting bad. Does anyone have any advice on how to bring up the subject of having serious hallucinations and delusions with someone that previously thought I only had emotional problems? I'm terrified they won't believe me or take me seriously. They know I was bad before, but I'm worse off now, and I'm afraid they'll think I'm pulling their leg or something.

Why wouldn't they believe you? I understand you're feeling scared but if these people have known you for a long time they should realize that someone who is having these emotional issues isn't someone who would joke about this stuff.

 

[zoozilla]

How many people here have given therapy a real try and feel they benefited from it? How many feel it was a waste? Just curious. I know therapy is probably my only hope and reclaiming my life but I keep putting it off.

Is there any way to stop obsessively thinking about how much you wish you could go back in time, be ten years younger, and do things differently? It's psychological torture but I can't stop.

I did some group therapy for my social anxiety. It was something my university offered (I went for a semester) and it was only a small group.

I think the thing I found most valuable was learning about how other people saw me. It's something you rarely hear, and it was nice for people to be explicit about the impression I give off (I guess I overcompensate for my anxiety by appearing really still and calm, while I freak out internally).

That being said, I don't think I opened up as much as I could have, and I now regret it, but it did show me how hard it is for me to completely open up to anyone, especially in a group setting.

Did it help me? Eh, I don't regret going, but it didn't change my life or anything. There is a certain comfort in knowing that others know what you feel.

 

[Ashes]

About the whole trusting/telling a friend thing - I think you have to feel for it. How well do you know your friend?

On actual 'telling' aspect, I'd be more deliberate in the language I'd use. For example Schizophrenia is now known as Salience Syndrome. Many people believed that the word Schizophrenia had with it negative connotations and is stigmatised so they chose to use a new more neutral term.

 

[Flo]

How many people here have given therapy a real try and feel they benefited from it? How many feel it was a waste? Just curious. I know therapy is probably my only hope and reclaiming my life but I keep putting it off.

Is there any way to stop obsessively thinking about how much you wish you could go back in time, be ten years younger, and do things differently? It's psychological torture but I can't stop.

I've done years of therapy, several kinds. Cognitive behavioural, groups, psychomotor therapy (is this an English term?)(It's pretty awesome). In the end they all helped me forward, but none of them fixed me quickly or on itself. I never thought I could feel as good as I have lately and I often fear feeling bad is just around the corner. But I'm a lot better than I was 10 years ago. I would recommend it.

 

[Hermii]

I know that I don't tend to respond to posts unless I feel like I have something constructive to say. Despite being a community thread, the problems we all face come in various forms and not everyone will know what to say to every situation.

I also wonder about posting more positive things. I don't want to make it sound like I'm bragging, particularly if it's after a somber post. I just want people to know that things can get better and that you can have some sort of control. I talk about it a bit more later on, but Collete had the right idea. Posting things that you are proud of or just something that you did is constructive for yourself and inspiring to others.

So this was the first post I made back when this was just the "Depression" thread.



If you had told me that in a year and a half that things would get better, I wouldn't have believed you. I'd have hated you for it. But two years after this post, things are better and looking up. That doesn't mean I don't have some really bad days. And that doesn't mean that I don't still make some really bad mistakes. And that doesn't mean that it can't all go to shit at a moment's notice, but I'm definitely gonna fight to make sure it doesn't and that those bad days don't last and that those mistakes don't define me and that I don't learn from them.

A few things have changed in that year.

I got a psychiatrist and started on Lexapro. It helped a lot for anxiety I didn't really realize I had until it went a way, and it helped cut down the duration of those bad days.

I got busy. I think this is really the most important thing that's helped. Are the self-esteem issues still there? Is the depression still there? Yes. But I decided to focus on being as productive as I can be in the time I have. Even if I fail, I'm gonna keep at it.

That website I made a year ago? My friend decided she didn't like it and didn't use it. That made me feel like shit, not gonna lie. But at least I made something, even if it's only something that I can admire. That's the mindset in which I began looking at my life. Make things, if people like them, AWESOME. If people don't, cry about it for a day, then get back to it. Speaking of which, you know who's awesome? Collete and Bagels and JB. They make stuff and post it here and even though I don't always respond, it's incredibly inspiring and every time I do see it, it makes me want to be productive too!

I know that I'm lazy and won't work unless I'm held accountable for stuff. So I made sure to put myself in situations in which I'd be held accountable. School is great for this, and as much stress as it causes, I now know how much I can take. If it's less classes than anyone else, that's okay. I joined clubs at school, despite feeling like I've forgotten how to interact with anyone who I'm not already friends with. I volunteered for everything that they needed. Needed someone to design posters? On it. Needed someone to edit articles? Sure. I feel like everyone secretly thinks I'm super weird and gross and secretly thinks "god why does the one girl who comes to every meeting have to be the ugly one" but at least I'm doing stuff. Dumb stuff, like posters to promote the club, but I've found that creating things makes me happy. Happy enough at least.

Great post except that one sentence that's been disagreed with a million times in this thread.

But the rest of it is inspirational. Damn I should be more like you. Do more stuff, take more responsibilities.

 

[Phenomic]

Again, this does not refer to anyone here on GAF or this thread, but man it irks me when people don't acknowledge me and ignore me. If I'm really that much of a pest; If I am really that annoying or if you really dislike me that much.... fucking tell me so I don't have to live with a lie that you're my "friend" or you "care" about me.

Just to be clear once again, this has nothing to do with anyone here at all. It's more about people I know face-to-face. I'm also not referring to any kind of 'picking up a girl' fedora "please respond" kind of situation at all but rather so-called "friends" and other people who feel the best way to deal with me is ignoring me.

I don't post much here, but I really would honestly just like to thank you for writing something as simple as this. I've had some bad circumstances come up where this type of thing has happened and it really really has messed with me.

Honestly just helps to know that someone else somewhere ... anywhere has had similar things happen and doesn't just alienate me as much and maybe I don't actually belong with the "please respond" crowd as much as I think I do. I've always felt like my situations weren't the same as that sentence, but I don't have any way to objectively prove that to myself and that hurts.

I feel like I try very hard to be attentive to others and make sure they aren't uncomfortable, but yeah when people just flat out ignore me without any excuse my mind just starts assaulting me.

 

[Arment]

Depression has gotten the better of me the last couple of months.

Can't seem to stick a relationship...feeling lonely. Sometimes I wish I never experienced the couple great relationships I have had because I know exactly what I'm missing out on.

Gathering the motivation to do constructive things is just harder for me than it used to be. I used to be able to get mad at myself enough to get me going but now I just don't fight back.

Slumps used to be what I called them. They used to last a week at most. The slumps seem to go longer and longer lately. I'm worried I'll eventually get into a slump that doesn't end.

Thanks for listening GAF.

 

[Ashes]

Thanks for listening GAF.

Thank you for thanking us.

 

[Femmeworth]

Woot. I have the house to myself for at least two weeks. This has never happened before.

 

[Tapejara]

So, I'm more pissed off than I should be right now. I scraped together enough cash to buy a new PS3 and it was DOA. As positive as I sounded in my last post, there are some things going on in the background of my life that just aren't working out. Lots of things have happened that are making me question my future and my ability to live with anxiety. I've felt pretty shitty. I felt like I deserved this and now I can't even use it. At least I got my money back.

Woot. I have the house to myself for at least two weeks. This has never happened before.

There are very few things I love more than being home alone. It's so quiet; I actually get stuff done.

 

[SugarDave]

I'm not sure if this is exactly the right thread to put this in, but it's something that bothers me a little.

I've suffered from what I can only assume is depression in the past (at the very least it's the sensation of being extremely down, exhausted and just plain barren) but since recently making some lifestyle changes I generally feel a lot better most of the time. However, anytime a social situation crops up, especially those involving family, I can't help but slump back down into just feeling horrible for the next few days. Today was my sister's 30th birthday, and we had a medium sized gathering of relatives to celebrate. I don't know what it is, but I just didn't feel right for most of the day. I just feel completely out of place even among those I'm closest to (I have healthy relationships with all of them) and I can't help but feel uncomfortable and like I don't belong. Even my brother's new girlfriend seemed to fit in more.

I've always been a quiet, reserved person so I understand this feeling of isolation is partly, or rather fully down to me, my family would never knowingly make me feel like this way, but I don't know why the feeling is there at all. I'm not sure what I'm expecting anyone here to tell me, I don't suppose there really is anything to be said. I just needed to type this out.

 

[User 100115]

I'm not sure if this is exactly the right thread to put this in, but it's something that bothers me a little.

I've suffered from what I can only assume is depression in the past (at the very least it's the sensation of being extremely down, exhausted and just plain barren) but since recently making some lifestyle changes I generally feel a lot better most of the time. However, anytime a social situation crops up, especially those involving family, I can't help but slump back down into just feeling horrible for the next few days. Today was my sister's 30th birthday, and we had a medium sized gathering of relatives to celebrate. I don't know what it is, but I just didn't feel right for most of the day. I just feel completely out of place even among those I'm closest to (I have healthy relationships with all of them) and I can't help but feel uncomfortable and like I don't belong. Even my brother's new girlfriend seemed to fit in more.

I've always been a quiet, reserved person so I understand this feeling of isolation is partly, or rather fully down to me, my family would never knowingly make me feel like this way, but I don't know why the feeling is there at all. I'm not sure what I'm expecting anyone here to tell me, I don't suppose there really is anything to be said. I just needed to type this out.

Thank you for sharing with us.

It's always a struggle when you want to hang out with folks but just don't feel it. It might be temporary, so keep that in mind. In the meantime, maybe try hanging out with just a few people at a time in comfortable setting like your own place?

I hope things get better for you.

 

[Advocatus Diaboli]

Hi, GAF. First post in this thread, but I've followed it for a while. It's admittedly taken a while for me to figure out how to parse this message, mostly because, after reading through others' problems here -- the truly severe ones -- I legitimately felt that my "noise" might drown out signals that need assistance. But this is truly a community, and recent threads on Imposter Syndrome and detailing one's aspirations have convinced me to give it a go.

I've never had dreams; I still have no aspirations. It's difficult to remember when I've truly been happy, and often I have to convince myself that I ought to act elated when something an objectively reasonable person would appreciate happens to me. By any stretch of the imagination, I'm successful: that's why I felt leery about posting. Sure, I'm not enamored of my job, and I might get fired this summer, but I'm employed. I'm highly educated, mostly because I want to feel smart, and chasing after letters with which to punctuate my name seemed a decent if expensive idea. I'm in no risk of being homeless or going hungry. In other words, I fully know others have it much, much worse.

When I was a kid, I suffered through years of severe depression (that no one ever recognized or inrferred), which is probably common for people here. I pulled myself out of it. Or at least I minimized the effects. About three years ago, I had friends; lived overseas in an exciting new country, Japan; and I was embarking on a promising career. But any progress I've made has fallen off entirely in the past 2 years -- now, I have no friends, as I have a random, erratic schedule and do shift work, plus I live in Florida (cue bugsbunny.gif). I've had basically no social interaction in the past 20 months beyond stilted work-related conversations and "Happy birthday!" comments on Facebook. I know I'm suffering longer downswings; this was one contributing factor in my recent divorce.

The apathy's fairly significant now. I'm not engaging in self-destructive behaviors, nor would I ever, but considering I have my estate planning finished, and I really don't have any goals or aspirations, I sort of shrug when I consider bleak things happening to me. But I do enjoy living, even if I don't enjoy my life as presently constituted. I was like this as a kid; I wasn't like this in Japan. While I don't think I'm at the point where I need professional help, I'm currently in the military, and recounting these thoughts would likely place my already tenuous job situation in further jeopardy. Plus I'm up for a high-level clearance.

Spoiler

Hi, FBI investigators!

I'm moving to D.C. in a little over a month, and I'm propping it up as the cure-all, which it probably won't be. I might even find, you know, some aspirations there? Really, I just feel terribly isolated and lonely. I'd love to be a sounding board for others, as I haven't felt useful in a long while, but mostly, I think I need practice with human interaction again. ...Thanks for listening!

 

[User 100115]

Hi, GAF. First post in this thread, but I've followed it for a while. It's admittedly taken a while for me to figure out how to parse this message, mostly because, after reading through others' problems here -- the truly severe ones -- I legitimately felt that my "noise" might drown out signals that need assistance. But this is truly a community, and recent threads on Imposter Syndrome and detailing one's aspirations have convinced me to give it a go.

First off, please never ever think your problems are less significant than other people's. They matter to you, therefore they matter.

Have you ever thought about talking to someone professionally? Or would that maybe interfere with your career?

 

[SugarDave]

Thank you for sharing with us.

It's always a struggle when you want to hang out with folks but just don't feel it. It might be temporary, so keep that in mind. In the meantime, maybe try hanging out with just a few people at a time in comfortable setting like your own place?

I hope things get better for you.

I should probably mention that I'm only 20 years old and still living at home. Now that I think about it, a lot of it may stem from pressure. It always seems to be family gatherings in particular that I feel this way about, and while I do get along with them, they clearly have expectations for what they want me to be or act like. For example, I don't drink and it's something they seem to always mention in some way as though it's a negative. I understand they want me to come out of my shell now and again but it's the approach they have about it that just doesn't gel with my personality. In the end, I usually end up playing with my nephews in the background to keep myself occupied.

I think they assume I'm the same way with strangers. Oddly enough, I'm a lot more outgoing in front of new people (so long as there's not a single person I know around), and I can be quite a social chameleon when I need to be. I think you're right though, I would likely feel better in a smaller group.

Thanks, I appreciate it.

 

[User 100115]

I should probably mention that I'm only 20 years old and still living at home. Now that I think about it, a lot of it may stem from pressure. It always seems to be family gatherings in particular that I feel this way about, and while I do get along with them, they clearly have expectations for what they want me to be or act like. For example, I don't drink and it's something they seem to always mention in some way as though it's a negative. I understand they want me to come out of my shell now and again but it's the approach they have about it that just doesn't gel with my personality. In the end, I usually end up playing with my nephews in the background to keep myself occupied.

I think they assume I'm the same way with strangers. Oddly enough, I'm a lot more outgoing in front of new people (so long as there's not a single person I know around), and I can be quite a social chameleon when I need to be. I think you're right though, I would likely feel better in a smaller group.

Thanks, I appreciate it.

I'm not a drinker either, so I understand that pressure. >.< And yeah, family expectations are hard, especially when they expect things you aren't really sure you want. They mean well, but it can be hurtful in the end. I am sorry

 

[SugarDave]

I'm not a drinker either, so I understand that pressure. >.< And yeah, family expectations are hard, especially when they expect things you aren't really sure you want. They mean well, but it can be hurtful in the end. I am sorry

Well said, still figuring out how to focus on the good intentions behind it. No worries, thanks.

 

[White Man]

Why wouldn't they believe you? I understand you're feeling scared but if these people have known you for a long time they should realize that someone who is having these emotional issues isn't someone who would joke about this stuff.

I dunno. I guess I think that they might not buy that someone they've known for years is considerably more fucked up than they previously believed.

I'm still rattled about that last episode. Even though I know it wasn't real, I don't feel safe in my apartment. I feel exposed and paranoid.

 

[Advocatus Diaboli]

First off, please never ever think your problems are less significant than other people's. They matter to you, therefore they matter.

Have you ever thought about talking to someone professionally? Or would that maybe interfere with your career?

Thanks, Fiction!

And, that's the gist of it. While there have been strides made in normalizing mental health problems in the military, it's still very much a stigma, and commanders have limited access to medical records, including mental health records. In fact, our mental health providers are required to inform the brass if certain criteria (which I can describe if anyone cares, though it's quite esoteric) are met.

 

[Windam]

I dunno. I guess I think that they might not buy that someone they've known for years is considerably more fucked up than they previously believed.

I'm still rattled about that last episode. Even though I know it wasn't real, I don't feel safe in my apartment. I feel exposed and paranoid.

If you feel they won't believe you right off the bat, try telling them you've been faring worse than usual. Any other symptoms like extra tiredness, decreased appetite or anything like that. Then on to mood, and if applicable, if you've been more inside your thoughts lately (if that makes any sense). Right there you can go "As well, I hallucinated...".

 

[User 100115]

Thanks, Fiction!

And, that's the gist of it. While there have been strides made in normalizing mental health problems in the military, it's still very much a stigma, and commanders have limited access to medical records, including mental health records. In fact, our mental health providers are required to inform the brass if certain criteria (which I can describe if anyone cares, though it's quite esoteric) are met.

That sucks

Maybe just remain hopeful that this move will help, but don't rely on it you know? You gotta find your own motivation and such. Maybe try to start a hobby? Something small that could give you some joy and lead to more exciting things?

 

[Darkmakaimura]

I don't post much here, but I really would honestly just like to thank you for writing something as simple as this. I've had some bad circumstances come up where this type of thing has happened and it really really has messed with me.

Honestly just helps to know that someone else somewhere ... anywhere has had similar things happen and doesn't just alienate me as much and maybe I don't actually belong with the "please respond" crowd as much as I think I do. I've always felt like my situations weren't the same as that sentence, but I don't have any way to objectively prove that to myself and that hurts.

I feel like I try very hard to be attentive to others and make sure they aren't uncomfortable, but yeah when people just flat out ignore me without any excuse my mind just starts assaulting me.

No problem and glad you found my post at least somewhat helpful. There is more I would like to say, especially in regards to recent tragic occurances in the news but I am on a tablet right now so I will wait until tomorrow.

 

[Wreck-It Ralph]

I'm feeling like shit.

Today is my 26th birthday. I still live with my parents and have never been in a relationship.

Meanwhile, my brother's wedding was yesterday. Now he's a married lawyer, my sister's a married nurse with a 3-year-old, and I'm just such a loser by comparison.

And on top of that, nobody cares that it's my birthday because everyone's so busy celebrating my brother's wedding.

I feel like I'm being selfish though, because I'm so busy feeling shitty about myself that I can't feel good for my brother.

 

[Ashes]

I'm feeling like shit.

Today is my 26th birthday. I still live with my parents and have never been in a relationship.

Meanwhile, my brother's wedding was yesterday. Now he's a married lawyer, my sister's a married nurse with a 3-year-old, and I'm just such a loser by comparison.

And on top of that, nobody cares that it's my birthday because everyone's so busy celebrating my brother's wedding.

I feel like I'm being selfish though, because I'm so busy feeling shitty about myself that I can't feel good for my brother.

Happy Birthday. I watched Wreck It Ralph just the other day.

I know weddings are rare and birthdays come around every year, but in my book it is just not cool to miss a birthday. Even if we do tend to celebrate them less and less as we age.

I think it's reasonable to feel a bit apprehensive when your siblings do really well. Mind my asking what it is that you do for a living or what it is that you would like to do?

 

[Wreck-It Ralph]

Happy Birthday. I watched Wreck It Ralph just the other day.

I know weddings are rare and birthdays come around every year, but in my book it is just not cool to miss a birthday. Even if we do tend to celebrate them less and less as we age.

I think it's reasonable to feel a bit apprehensive when your siblings do really well. Mind my asking what it is that you do for a living or what it is that you would like to do?

That's the thing, I'm not even doing anything. I've only just gone back to school after wasting the first half of my 20s.

 

[Ashes]

That's the thing, I'm not even doing anything. I've only just gone back to school after wasting the first half of my 20s.

What kind of school?

 

[Wreck-It Ralph]

What kind of school?

College. For a degree in software development.

 

[Ashes]

College. For a degree in software development.

Woh.

Did you turn around that part of your life yourself? Or did you get help?
Not that we ought to be counting our chickens yet.

 

[Advocatus Diaboli]

That's the thing, I'm not even doing anything. I've only just gone back to school after wasting the first half of my 20s.

I think it's great that you're doing that. I also really do believe that going to school "counts" as doing something. Not to mention the marketability of a software development degree, especially if you're working piecemeal on projects here and there to build up your portfolio.

Besides, I'll leave you with this: you're spending the second half of your 20s doing something (hopefully) that you love, doing something that I think is incredibly awesome. I spent the first half of my 20s getting a degree... in French. So, there's nothing wrong with reorienting ourselves later on in life. I'd legitimately love to hear about what projects you're working on; software is a fleeting hobby of mine.

 

[Foffy]

But of an update: got hospice orientation on Wednesday, and I'd probably easily get cleared to volunteer there.

I'm hype. I hope I can finally be using my times for others in profound ways.

 

[Smiley90]

But of an update: got hospice orientation on Wednesday, and I'd probably easily get cleared to volunteer there.

I'm hype. I hope I can finally be using my times for others in profound ways.

Yay! I hope it'll be a good experience and you'll find it worthwhile.

 

[Pau]

But of an update: got hospice orientation on Wednesday, and I'd probably easily get cleared to volunteer there.

I'm hype. I hope I can finally be using my times for others in profound ways.

Congrats! Volunteering can be a tough experience at times, but ultimately rewarding for both you and others.

 

[halfbeast]

I should probably mention that I'm only 20 years old and still living at home. Now that I think about it, a lot of it may stem from pressure. It always seems to be family gatherings in particular that I feel this way about, and while I do get along with them, they clearly have expectations for what they want me to be or act like. For example, I don't drink and it's something they seem to always mention in some way as though it's a negative. I understand they want me to come out of my shell now and again but it's the approach they have about it that just doesn't gel with my personality. In the end, I usually end up playing with my nephews in the background to keep myself occupied.

I think they assume I'm the same way with strangers. Oddly enough, I'm a lot more outgoing in front of new people (so long as there's not a single person I know around), and I can be quite a social chameleon when I need to be. I think you're right though, I would likely feel better in a smaller group.

Thanks, I appreciate it.

you mentioned "healthy relationships". what do you mean by that? many do wrong things with the best intentions.

considering you're still young how are your thoughts about moving out? just the idea of it, does it feel exciting/a relief or are you afraid of leaving your parents? for me once I moved out, things got a lot better. as you said, you're more outgoing with new people probably because you don't fall into that role you have, when you're with family.

 

[Burger_Baron]

Is there anybody to talk/message to today? Someone who responds in 15-30 minutes and will be up for quite some time?(Like an hour or two, I've just had a major breakdown again and I would love to speak to someone.) I would like to make an public post to this thred, but they usually get lost in the stream of posts. And even when somebody responds, they rarely create anything productive.

 

[ceramic]

I really feel like I need medication to help me with these issues.

I went out today in order to join a yoga class, as it's a 3 day weekend and I didn't want to waste it. As I approached the building I could feel my anxiety shooting up, my mind was just pumping out hundreds of reasons why I shouldn't do it; I don't belong there, the class will be mostly/ all women who will find me uncomfortable, I'm too ugly, I'm not wearing the right gym clothes, I'm going to embarrass myself, I'm not going to be able to start a conversation with them and they will find it weird.

I went into the building and up the stairs, got up to the doors where you enter the reception area and I just choked. I kind of hovered outside the door for about 15 minutes until it was too late.

There was another gym class an hour and a half later. I left the building for the time being. When I got near the building my mind started pumping out reasons for not doing it again. This time I felt tired and weak which made it worse. I hovered outside the building for about 20 minutes, fighting with myself to go inside, but I couldn't do it.

This anxiety is destroying my life.

Even when I get into social situations I can't express myself how I would like as I feel hugely inhibited. So even if I attended the classes it's not like I would make friends in them.


Can UK GPs prescribe antidepressants or do I need to be referred to a psychiatrist first? Can I get referred direct to a psychiatrist from my GP or do I have to go through a psychologist first?

 

[Ashes]

Did you have a panic attack?