Autism - Welcome to the Spectrum

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My son started his meds yesterday and we received a note from his teacher saying he seemed to be able to work independently more than usual and didn't space out so much. Not sure if you can tell in one day, but then again for a little kid I can imagine medications are going to have a strong impact on him. And this is a lower dose, since he has a heart condition and every med he gets is carefully monitored.

Sounds like his teacher just doesn't want to deal with him. Which is complete BS.

Also, why are you waiting on a school diagnosis? We took our kid to a developmental ped to get diagnosed. The did the ADOS and tested his speech. It was kind of expensive to do, but it was better than relying on the state to do it.

It's all done through the school system. We took him to the ped and they sent us to an autism center where he was examined for a couple hours, but it takes their input with the schools to do a full diagnosis apparently.

That said, I'm going by what my wife was doing, since when this process started I was working and she was taking him to his appts but it's the opposite now. I'll look into seeing if there are other options.
 
My son started his meds yesterday and we received a note from his teacher saying he seemed to be able to work independently more than usual and didn't space out so much. Not sure if you can tell in one day, but then again for a little kid I can imagine medications are going to have a strong impact on him. And this is a lower dose, since he has a heart condition and every med he gets is carefully monitored.

I'm glad the meds are helping. I have a sister that did he PhD work on medication for ADHD and ADD children. It's not unusual for children on the spectrum to also have ADD and/or ADHD.


It's all done through the school system. We took him to the ped and they sent us to an autism center where he was examined for a couple hours, but it takes their input with the schools to do a full diagnosis apparently.

That said, I'm going by what my wife was doing, since when this process started I was working and she was taking him to his appts but it's the opposite now. I'll look into seeing if there are other options.
My wife was/is the primary researcher/appt maker in our house. She was on top of everything. It helped having one person being the primary POC for all of that stuff. I supported whenever I could, but she was the rock.
 
Really interesting popping into this thread from time to time. My parents went through a lot with me. I turned out okay in the end. Ish.

Someone asked above about compulsive collecting. I am going to make a guess at one of the Warhammer games? It is a bit tricky to explain, anyway, and maybe I am not a good representative sample, but for me obsession is/was more of an escapist habit than anything else. The world is this big uncomfortable place and the thing you are interested is nice and orderly and you can do whatever you want with it. You can learn all the rules and facts and think about all the connections. And that comes from stress, really. These days when I get really stressed out, sad or angry I often, sad as it is, end up thinking about the relative merits of certain cards over others in Hearthstone, or try to remember combos and facts about Street Fighter. Having something little to care about and understand matters a lot to my mental state. Or maybe AS is different in that from ASD.

Dealing with it can be hard because of perspective. If you are really obsesses it is hard to see that your absolute everything is really only a tiny part of reality.

Getting them out and doing more things is important, but doing that without breaking routine is the tricky bit. :
 
So I have been taking my son with ASD to gymnastics for a few months. And he works really hard to stay with the class and follow instructions. Which he has been doing an amazing job, because he never has the same instructor and there is tons of shit going on with the 5 different classes that are happening at the same time.
Then this new instructor is added to the mix. And guess what he starts making it a game when my son runs off. So then it becomes play time and it just makes the job the instructors have to do that much harder. They know he has ASD, so they should know what's up.
 
my step sisters family have a child with what looks to many of us like adhd or a spectrum malady unfortunately she isnt clearly enough a problem to trigger all the help one gets. So the parents are merely exhausted and grouchy and the teacher often has to talk with them after school about the days meltdown.

I know the books say just pretend you booked a holiday to one city and you found yourself in a different one, make the best of it! but from the outside it looks like they wanted a trip to hawaii and landed in north korea instead.

Also it clearly impacts the raising of the younger normal child. They end up getting hit with a lot of shrapnel.
 
my step sisters family have a child with what looks to many of us like adhd or a spectrum malady unfortunately she isnt clearly enough a problem to trigger all the help one gets. So the parents are merely exhausted and grouchy and the teacher often has to talk with them after school about the days meltdown.

I know the books say just pretend you booked a holiday to one city and you found yourself in a different one, make the best of it! but from the outside it looks like they wanted a trip to hawaii and landed in north korea instead.

Also it clearly impacts the raising of the younger normal child. They end up getting hit with a lot of shrapnel.

Okay.

Okay.

The first thing you need to do is stop being so goddamn offensive.

It's pretty clear you see this as some horrible shitstain on your life. It's not.

Now.

Why did you post this? Do you want help or are you just talking about how your Little Jimmy is a nuisance?
 
my step sisters family have a child with what looks to many of us like adhd or a spectrum malady unfortunately she isnt clearly enough a problem to trigger all the help one gets. So the parents are merely exhausted and grouchy and the teacher often has to talk with them after school about the days meltdown.
Has the kid been diagnosed with anything? Without a diagnosis there is no help. Unless the kid is developmentally delayed, then the school would be able to assess them and give an IEP.

I know the books say just pretend you booked a holiday to one city and you found yourself in a different one, make the best of it! but from the outside it looks like they wanted a trip to hawaii and landed in north korea instead.
The person who came up with that saying is a fuckin asshole. I have a son who happens to have ASD. We have to make adjustments for him. But it's not that fuckin hard. Once the parent makes the adjustment, then they stop having a special needs kid and start having a kid that also has special needs.


Also it clearly impacts the raising of the younger normal child. They end up getting hit with a lot of shrapnel.
Both children are normal. One is neurotypical and the other is not.


I do see where you are coming from. I have a nephew who has digeorge syndrome. My wife and I would constantly worry about the kid and his affect on his younger sister. And we would worry that my sister wasn't doing enough. The only good thing to come out of all of that was our vigilance for our son. We also learned a lot humility along the way.
 
I'm sorry, Jellies, I got really, really angry. But you need to understand how outlandishly retarded you sound when you say shit like equating a "normal" child to Hawaii and one with a disability to a state where its inhabitants starve due to a terrorist dictator. Then the grenade analogy, which I can't even begin to pick apart because of the lack of context. I have no problem with your use of the word "malady", but what I do have a problem with is that these people don't seem to be interested in, from how you describe it, getting a diagnosis.

You obviously have not read this thread, or you'd see this is not the "Bitching About Autism" thread. Many of the members of GAF that post here (including me) are on the spectrum.

Autism in general is not "rare". 1 in 68 have autism. 1 in 42 in boys. That's four million people in the United States alone.
 
I apologize for being flippant. My thought to enter the topic was lament the situation I knew of where someone is not sufficiently obviously in an easily diagnosed category that triggers professional advice, and the right support at school etc.

This family is very well ediucated and financially secure, and able to look after themselves and they will end up solving their issues, however from the outside it has been very rough for them.

Spectum disorders dont fit into neat little boxes and I am sure in the future some ways that things get done or not done would be considered wrong or ineffective, and this seems to fall harder on kids who are not ao clearly one thing or another.

As for whether the situation is difficult or just different. I am sure every situation is unique but these particular parents have looked shattered for years (all the relatives us included help) and part of that is because there are not always little diagnosis boxes that solve everything when checked.
 
So my son is obsessed with Hulk. At first it was cool because I like the hulk. And it was great being able to get him stuff he actually likes. But now it's hulk everything. He pretends to be the hulk and won't do other pretend play. He flips out about not being able to watch hulk 24/7.
I wish he would like more than just the hulk.
 
What are you doing about it?
I'm making suggestions of other stuff that he could do or watch. I don't want him to stop enjoying something he enjoys. I'm trying to make sure he never hits people or break things. My buddy told me to use hulk as a learning tool. So I have been pointing out all of the trouble hulk causes.
 
New job.

Week five my manager calls a one to one. Talks about how I need to be more social. Communicate better. Need to get to know everyone on the team. Talks about how communication is a core value of the company. How that my integration was a big focal point of my probation.

When I wrote up my full application form I informed the HR department that I had Aspergers Syndrome. That was ten, twelve weeks ago. I assumed after not being contacted about it that they were doing the smart thing - a bit of a run about behind the scenes to let the people that needed to know know.

Called a meeting with HR to talk about it. They blamed the lack of communication on my line manager skipping over that part of my application and me for not letting people know. Said they'd talk to the line manager about it.

Also denied all responsibility for me being told I'd be able to get a car share sorted at my interview when there was no active car share scheme - a lie that is now costing me £300 a month and 3 hours a day on the train.

I sat at my desk for two hours afterwards poking around my desk and doing some trivial work. I've packed my stuff up and taken it home.

I have tomorrow booked off work. I am seriously contemplating calling up on Wednesday morning to quit, citing breach of contract and duty of care.
 
New job.

Week five my manager calls a one to one. Talks about how I need to be more social. Communicate better. Need to get to know everyone on the team. Talks about how communication is a core value of the company. How that my integration was a big focal point of my probation.

When I wrote up my full application form I informed the HR department that I had Aspergers Syndrome. That was ten, twelve weeks ago. I assumed after not being contacted about it that they were doing the smart thing - a bit of a run about behind the scenes to let the people that needed to know know.

Called a meeting with HR to talk about it. They blamed the lack of communication on my line manager skipping over that part of my application and me for not letting people know. Said they'd talk to the line manager about it.

Also denied all responsibility for me being told I'd be able to get a car share sorted at my interview when there was no active car share scheme - a lie that is now costing me £300 a month and 3 hours a day on the train.

I sat at my desk for two hours afterwards poking around my desk and doing some trivial work. I've packed my stuff up and taken it home.

I have tomorrow booked off work. I am seriously contemplating calling up on Wednesday morning to quit, citing breach of contract and duty of care.

look for a new job first. It's better to have something lined up first.
Granted everything they have done is bullshit and HR has not done their job at all.
 
look for a new job first. It's better to have something lined up first.
Granted everything they have done is bullshit and HR has not done their job at all.

My old job is rehiring. They called me back the week after I got offered my new job with my old job offer back. Turned them down because I was told at interview that I'd be able to get a carshare sorted so the whole three and a half hour round trip and fifth of my pay on the train thing would not happen at the new place.

Gonna leave a message with the old job's reception ASAP to get my old manager to call me first thing tomorrow.
 
Really interesting popping into this thread from time to time. My parents went through a lot with me. I turned out okay in the end. Ish.

Someone asked above about compulsive collecting. I am going to make a guess at one of the Warhammer games? It is a bit tricky to explain, anyway, and maybe I am not a good representative sample, but for me obsession is/was more of an escapist habit than anything else. The world is this big uncomfortable place and the thing you are interested is nice and orderly and you can do whatever you want with it. You can learn all the rules and facts and think about all the connections. And that comes from stress, really. These days when I get really stressed out, sad or angry I often, sad as it is, end up thinking about the relative merits of certain cards over others in Hearthstone, or try to remember combos and facts about Street Fighter. Having something little to care about and understand matters a lot to my mental state. Or maybe AS is different in that from ASD.

Dealing with it can be hard because of perspective. If you are really obsesses it is hard to see that your absolute everything is really only a tiny part of reality.

Getting them out and doing more things is important, but doing that without breaking routine is the tricky bit. :
I've been living with Asbergers since i was 4 and this is the case with Me. I collect blu-rays specifically horror films. And these are an escape for me. My family has had to deal with a lot with me. But I now have had a job for 4 years and am almost done with college so I think I turned out alright.
 
Summer is approaching, which isn't a good thing for our house. My son loves the structure of school and the routine. My son does not do well when he is out of school for an extended period of time. So we are looking into camps. There is 1 autism camp, but it's booked up and over 40 minutes away. So we are looking into half day camps that are run by the county and close by.

Anyone have similar experiences?
 
Summer is approaching, which isn't a good thing for our house. My son loves the structure of school and the routine. My son does not do well when he is out of school for an extended period of time. So we are looking into camps. There is 1 autism camp, but it's booked up and over 40 minutes away. So we are looking into half day camps that are run by the county and close by.

Anyone have similar experiences?

Not camps, specifically, but we definitely have to add structure to my four year old's summer or he will be bouncing off the walls.

In our case, we double his morning ABA schedule to ~20 hours a week, since it lets them focus in on some of the behavioral challenges with extra attention. Last year the extra therapy was very beneficial. Since it's summer, we try to balance that by scheduling lots of fun stuff for him almost every afternoon. We do swim lesson, soccer, and horseback riding currently. We do almost weekly trips to the zoo (thank god for season passes!). We take him to play at the park. We do lots of hiking.

The key is to keep him busy, but not overwhelm him with work. Our boy loves the outdoors, so we get him out every day.
 
My oldest son wants to know more about autism. He's about to be 7. His younger brother has autism and explains to his older brother that he has autism.
So what is the best way to explain it to him. I know how to explain it to adults. I can explain it to him in very simple terms, but I my son needs something in the middle.
So I'm looking for some help here on the best way to communicate to him about autism.
 
He's 19.

Every time we try to confront him about something he's done wrong, he goes into emotional manipulation mode and turns himself into the victim.

His latest example, when confronted about staying out all night, directed to his mom after being told not to stay out all night (she does everything in the world for him), "Am I even your son anymore?"

What can I do about this?
 
He's 19.

Every time we try to confront him about something he's done wrong, he goes into emotional manipulation mode and turns himself into the victim.

His latest example, when confronted about staying out all night, directed to his mom after being told not to stay out all night (she does everything in the world for him), "Am I even your son anymore?"

What can I do about this?
I live in NC and I checked out an organization called TEACCH. They're our state support organization for families with ASD kids and adults. They have groups and all kinds of people who can provide advice. I suggest you checkout a group like that. Also your state/area should have an autism society you can join.
 
I took an autism test as part of a study and asked what my results were. Apparently I tested as low as one can on the test. I was kind of surprised. I figured I had a touch of the autism since I heard about it.
 
I work at Duke and I keep an eye out for any autism stuff. And an article was in the duke paper about an autism research app.

The app uses an iPhone’s self-facing camera to assess a child’s emotional state while viewing various stimuli. The dots are landmarks automatically placed on a video of the child by the software

http://today.duke.edu/2015/10/autismbeyond

I downloaded it and am checking it out.
It is for kids with ASD between 1 & 6.
 
Reviving this thread because I'm concerned about my son with autism. He's five, he's been diagnosed since shortly after his second birthday, and for the most part he has been making amazing strides. He "graduated" from his extracurricular speech and occupational therapies over a year and a half ago. Now he is in a special autism preschool class, goes to a group therapy program twice a week after school, and is going to be transitioning to the "regular" kindergarten class after this summer.

The main thing we're worried about are his eating habits. For years I could count the amount of foods he would eat on one hand. It has grown a little bit in recent months, but the real issue is that he usually doesn't want to eat at all. He very rarely asks for food and he often refuses it completely. When he actually is fine with eating, he rarely finishes his meals. Sometimes he gets really interested in one of his favorite foods and will ask for it over and over, but we don't want him to get sick so we try to avoid that.

Lately he's been throwing a fit every morning when we tell him to eat breakfast. He'd rather play/read/do anything than sit and eat, but if we let him have a toy/book/TV while eating he gets too distracted to eat. His grandmother usually feeds him while my wife and I go to work early in the morning, and we found out that she's taken to hand-feeding him most of the time because he'll take his food that way and it gets done in time for school.

Honestly, as a person with eating issues myself, I don't care that much about the lack of variety compared to him just not wanting to eat most of the time. Anyone have any experience with this sort of thing?
 
Reviving this thread because I'm concerned about my son with autism. He's five, he's been diagnosed since shortly after his second birthday, and for the most part he has been making amazing strides. He "graduated" from his extracurricular speech and occupational therapies over a year and a half ago. Now he is in a special autism preschool class, goes to a group therapy program twice a week after school, and is going to be transitioning to the "regular" kindergarten class after this summer.

The main thing we're worried about are his eating habits. For years I could count the amount of foods he would eat on one hand. It has grown a little bit in recent months, but the real issue is that he usually doesn't want to eat at all. He very rarely asks for food and he often refuses it completely. When he actually is fine with eating, he rarely finishes his meals. Sometimes he gets really interested in one of his favorite foods and will ask for it over and over, but we don't want him to get sick so we try to avoid that.

Lately he's been throwing a fit every morning when we tell him to eat breakfast. He'd rather play/read/do anything than sit and eat, but if we let him have a toy/book/TV while eating he gets too distracted to eat. His grandmother usually feeds him while my wife and I go to work early in the morning, and we found out that she's taken to hand-feeding him most of the time because he'll take his food that way and it gets done in time for school.

Honestly, as a person with eating issues myself, I don't care that much about the lack of variety compared to him just not wanting to eat most of the time. Anyone have any experience with this sort of thing?

I do, because I was that kid, and still have the legacy of such.

To clarify, I'm autistic myself, so my experience isn't quite what you'd be after, but I've been able to gleam some of it from how my parents have commented on it over the years. My palette is still pretty limited and plain, but it is functional, and so I'm able to do enough as to make different meals for myself.

Now admittedly, I wasn't diagnosed until I was like eight, so my parents didn't really approach my behaviour from the perspective that I was autistic for quite a while. Prior to it, it seems they were... stern but supportive, as such. For example, I was obsessed with McDonalds as a child, and would sometimes throw a tantrum if I wasn't allowed to eat it. Sometimes they would just wait it out and not reward the bad behaviour (to clarify, in the explicit sense that it was something I shouldn't be doing, not that it was solely inconvenient to them), whilst say, if they wanted me to eat something, they would give me some kind of minor encouragement - if I ate now, McDonalds later in the week, so forth.

When he comes to what favourite foods he does have, try to pick out those that can function in relation to differing mealsets. For example, with me, it was quickly apparent that I liked white rice - which was good because being a side dish, its extremely easy to put together with other foods. So even if I didn't like one half or third of a meal that they wanted me to try out, there was still something that I could eat and would want to. If you introduce something new, you use the familiarity of his favourites to cushion it. Perhaps rotate between favourites so you're not just doing the same thing several days in a row.

Ideally, it'll get a bit easier as he grows older, and is more able to consciously reflect on his preferences - and also better realise why eating is important. Until that point, and perhaps to help him reach it, some kind of basic reward system could be of use, though I will admit its not perfect given his current age. But if you were to use it, such a system would ideally be minor enough in each instance that he can put it off or not feel too bad for failing that obligation, but significant enough in the longterm that he wants to do it. So say, each time he eats his breakfast, he gets a star, and X amount of stars will allow him some reward - a new toy, for example. Something that he's expressed interest in but you have either refused or failed to justify; suddenly he has an avenue for it, and gives you enough time to anticipate it.

I apologise if I've wrongly presumed or this sort of advice runs contrary to anything else you've received.
 
I do, because I was that kid, and still have the legacy of such.

To clarify, I'm autistic myself, so my experience isn't quite what you'd be after, but I've been able to gleam some of it from how my parents have commented on it over the years. My palette is still pretty limited and plain, but it is functional, and so I'm able to do enough as to make different meals for myself.

Now admittedly, I wasn't diagnosed until I was like eight, so my parents didn't really approach my behaviour from the perspective that I was autistic for quite a while. Prior to it, it seems they were... stern but supportive, as such. For example, I was obsessed with McDonalds as a child, and would sometimes throw a tantrum if I wasn't allowed to eat it. Sometimes they would just wait it out and not reward the bad behaviour (to clarify, in the explicit sense that it was something I shouldn't be doing, not that it was solely inconvenient to them), whilst say, if they wanted me to eat something, they would give me some kind of minor encouragement - if I ate now, McDonalds later in the week, so forth.

When he comes to what favourite foods he does have, try to pick out those that can function in relation to differing mealsets. For example, with me, it was quickly apparent that I liked white rice - which was good because being a side dish, its extremely easy to put together with other foods. So even if I didn't like one half or third of a meal that they wanted me to try out, there was still something that I could eat and would want to. If you introduce something new, you use the familiarity of his favourites to cushion it. Perhaps rotate between favourites so you're not just doing the same thing several days in a row.

Ideally, it'll get a bit easier as he grows older, and is more able to consciously reflect on his preferences - and also better realise why eating is important. Until that point, and perhaps to help him reach it, some kind of basic reward system could be of use, though I will admit its not perfect given his current age. But if you were to use it, such a system would ideally be minor enough in each instance that he can put it off or not feel too bad for failing that obligation, but significant enough in the longterm that he wants to do it. So say, each time he eats his breakfast, he gets a star, and X amount of stars will allow him some reward - a new toy, for example. Something that he's expressed interest in but you have either refused or failed to justify; suddenly he has an avenue for it, and gives you enough time to anticipate it.

I apologise if I've wrongly presumed or this sort of advice runs contrary to anything else you've received.

Thank you for the advice. Some of that is new to me, so I'll pass it along to my wife. We've definitely done some of that, though - such as the stars-for-rewards. We've tried a couple of variations on that and it works for a few days or maybe even a few weeks before he stops caring.

I admit that part of me just wants to let him go hungry if he won't eat and hope that he gets the idea and decides to eat when we tell him to, which is the sort of thing that MY dad would do to me, but of course I can never quite tell how my son is going to react to anything. Plus, my wife would refuse and think I'm the devil.
 
I work with a 30 year old autistic person. His communication is very lacking and has mobility issues. He usually repeats anything you say to him unless its a question, he will try to answer it but usually its just gibberish. He can not really express himself emotionally, anytime you ask him how he is feeling he will say hes ok. I have seen him get really upset with me but I have no idea why, after 10 minutes he acts like nothing has happening.

He knows he has a disability but he doesn't truly understand what autism is. I have tried to explain it to him but I don't think he gets it, the idea of what it is, is to abstract for him.

Any tips/help/activities/websites would be appreciated. Currently I spend 1 hour with him, socializing with him, reminding him to make eye contact, asking him questions, using the internet, in general trying to keep his mind active. The next hour I help him with playing the piano and doing vocal exercises to help him speak louder and clearer. A real problem is that he doesn't speak very loudly. The next hour I take him to the gym and help him work out.

Anybody with autism can relate?
 
Thank you for the advice. Some of that is new to me, so I'll pass it along to my wife. We've definitely done some of that, though - such as the stars-for-rewards. We've tried a couple of variations on that and it works for a few days or maybe even a few weeks before he stops caring.

I admit that part of me just wants to let him go hungry if he won't eat and hope that he gets the idea and decides to eat when we tell him to, which is the sort of thing that MY dad would do to me, but of course I can never quite tell how my son is going to react to anything. Plus, my wife would refuse and think I'm the devil.

That's the tricky thing with the spectrum. What worked for one person (ie, myself) make not work for another, though it can be the form as much as the method.

Mind you, I will say that I've not actually not eaten breakfast for most of my life - my family's routine was to have a drink and a small snack on the bedside cabinet.

I work with a 30 year old autistic person. His communication is very lacking and has mobility issues. He usually repeats anything you say to him unless its a question, he will try to answer it but usually its just gibberish. He can not really express himself emotionally, anytime you ask him how he is feeling he will say hes ok. I have seen him get really upset with me but I have no idea why, after 10 minutes he acts like nothing has happening.

He knows he has a disability but he doesn't truly understand what autism is. I have tried to explain it to him but I don't think he gets it, the idea of what it is, is to abstract for him.

Any tips/help/activities/websites would be appreciated. Currently I spend 1 hour with him, socializing with him, reminding him to make eye contact, asking him questions, using the internet, in general trying to keep his mind active. The next hour I help him with playing the piano and doing vocal exercises to help him speak louder and clearer. A real problem is that he doesn't speak very loudly. The next hour I take him to the gym and help him work out.

Anybody with autism can relate?

As for this, I can only express familiarity with some of it. Most of the people I've known with autism (and its a fair few, given my secondary school had dedicated services for students with learning disabilities) have had decent enough mobility, and their communication functional, even if utterly lacking in social nuance or understanding of external interests.

In general, when it comes to stuff like emotional reactions or a lack thereof, there's a lot of factors involved. Keep in mind that for many with autism, there can be a difficulty in reading emotions from others, because many don't inherently recognise facial expressions and body gestures the same way that others might. Similarly, it can be a little difficult to express in some circumstances because... saying 'its ok' or 'its fine' means there doesn't have to be any kind of disruption or intervention, or if things really are just okay, its the most serviceable response to give, rather than what an asker may actually want.

As to why he gets into an outburst and then completely drop it moments later, it varies and manifests in differing degrees. Sometimes it can be a matter of a minor irritant that people don't realise, but take to such a degree that the only result is an explosion of emotion (quite commonly anger). For me, such an irritant was being bullied (okay, not so minor), but in others it can be... lack of validation, denial of their desires for what they feel isn't good cause, or maybe something being done that is entirely contrary to their wishes but they never felt had to be specified - so offense is often taken as a very personal slight against them. But because that sort of outburst is well outside of routine, and many with autism are extremely self-conscious, its not that surprising to quickly step back from it, or desire to move on quickly, to the point they may not recognise why others don't so easily do the same.

Since you're evidently trying to ensure he can use computers and such (or at least, the internet) I kinda wonder, does he have any interest in video games, or electronics in general? Because there are a few analogies I've become fond of when it comes to explaining autism, and a fair number of other disabilities which he might understand - or if not, could always see if there's some with a particular routine that he gets into.
 
That's the tricky thing with the spectrum. What worked for one person (ie, myself) make not work for another, though it can be the form as much as the method.

Mind you, I will say that I've not actually not eaten breakfast for most of my life - my family's routine was to have a drink and a small snack on the bedside cabinet.



As for this, I can only express familiarity with some of it. Most of the people I've known with autism (and its a fair few, given my secondary school had dedicated services for students with learning disabilities) have had decent enough mobility, and their communication functional, even if utterly lacking in social nuance or understanding of external interests.

In general, when it comes to stuff like emotional reactions or a lack thereof, there's a lot of factors involved. Keep in mind that for many with autism, there can be a difficulty in reading emotions from others, because many don't inherently recognise facial expressions and body gestures the same way that others might. Similarly, it can be a little difficult to express in some circumstances because... saying 'its ok' or 'its fine' means there doesn't have to be any kind of disruption or intervention, or if things really are just okay, its the most serviceable response to give, rather than what an asker may actually want.

As to why he gets into an outburst and then completely drop it moments later, it varies and manifests in differing degrees. Sometimes it can be a matter of a minor irritant that people don't realise, but take to such a degree that the only result is an explosion of emotion (quite commonly anger). For me, such an irritant was being bullied (okay, not so minor), but in others it can be... lack of validation, denial of their desires for what they feel isn't good cause, or maybe something being done that is entirely contrary to their wishes but they never felt had to be specified - so offense is often taken as a very personal slight against them. But because that sort of outburst is well outside of routine, and many with autism are extremely self-conscious, its not that surprising to quickly step back from it, or desire to move on quickly, to the point they may not recognise why others don't so easily do the same.

Since you're evidently trying to ensure he can use computers and such (or at least, the internet) I kinda wonder, does he have any interest in video games, or electronics in general? Because there are a few analogies I've become fond of when it comes to explaining autism, and a fair number of other disabilities which he might understand - or if not, could always see if there's some with a particular routine that he gets into.

Thank you for the response. I do know some of his triggers with anger. I know he was bullied when he was in school a lot so he is very sensitive when talking about disabilities. I also know that when his parents try to 'help' him when I'm doing a lesson with him he starts to become irritated. When I asked him why he got upset at me he said " because you were advocating torture" :) or " because you took the bus" Doesn't make a whole lot of sense but I found it funny. Keep in mind I have been working with him for a year and a half and I only seen him get really angry twice.

He loves computers. He is obsessed with Linux Operating systems. He visits different websites based on Linux OS's, things I never even heard of, like slackware, or debian etc.

Interesting how the mind works :)
 
Thank you for the response. I do know some of his triggers with anger. I know he was bullied when he was in school a lot so he is very sensitive when talking about disabilities. I also know that when his parents try to 'help' him when I'm doing a lesson with him he starts to become irritated. When I asked him why he got upset at me he said " because you were advocating torture" :) or " because you took the bus" Doesn't make a whole lot of sense but I found it funny. Keep in mind I have been working with him for a year and a half and I only seen him get really angry twice.

He loves computers. He is obsessed with Linux Operating systems. He visits different websites based on Linux OS's, things I never even heard of, like slackware, or debian etc.

Interesting how the mind works :)

Ha, then you have the perfect analogy (unless you've already tried it, in which case... not so much, I guess). But basically, when you comes to autism, and many other disabilities, its like running a Linux OS as opposed to a Windows one - with proper 'coding' and resources it can be made to do much of the same stuff that a PC does, but you can't just the dump the code from one to the other and expect it to still work.
 
Reviving this thread because I'm concerned about my son with autism. He's five, he's been diagnosed since shortly after his second birthday, and for the most part he has been making amazing strides. He "graduated" from his extracurricular speech and occupational therapies over a year and a half ago. Now he is in a special autism preschool class, goes to a group therapy program twice a week after school, and is going to be transitioning to the "regular" kindergarten class after this summer.

The main thing we're worried about are his eating habits. For years I could count the amount of foods he would eat on one hand. It has grown a little bit in recent months, but the real issue is that he usually doesn't want to eat at all...

Lately he's been throwing a fit every morning when we tell him to eat breakfast. He'd rather play/read/do anything than sit and eat...

Honestly, as a person with eating issues myself, I don't care that much about the lack of variety compared to him just not wanting to eat most of the time. Anyone have any experience with this sort of thing?

Awesome news on the progress.

As for the eating thing, my son gives me hell. He's not having the same issue as your boy. But my friend's son sounds exactly like yours. They were looking into some kind of feed therapy, but that might be a texture issue for him and it could totally not apply to your son. Any way, I would at least ask the therapist and see what they say.

Good luck
 
Trailer for the upcoming documentary on Robert Gagno, a competitive pinball player who is ranked #1 in Canada and usually in the top 20 in the world. He's a super nice guy, and this will be about him trying to figure out how to be more indepenent.

https://vimeo.com/159739962
 
So I haven't read the full thread so I apologize if any of what I write comes across as immature, uneducated, or insensitive in any way.

My son just turned 2 years old on March 3rd. He doesn't speak much, or not as much as other kids around his age. For example his cousin who is exactly an year older was speaking in full sentences at age 2. Still wife and I are not too concerned because we know some kids learn a little later.

He says his colors, some #s, about a dozen to 20 words, and asks for food.

But the concern is that at his 2 year check up the doctor asked if he stares randomly at nothing in particular. I've noticed it very rarely so technically the answer is yes.

We also read something about kids walking on tip-toes. I've seen him do that sometimes. He often likes to walk over his toys and when he gets off of them he continues to walk as if he is stepping over toys still. Looks like he is wearing invisible heels.

I mean that's it. Just those 2 things. Slow to speak for his age and tip toes. But it's worried my wife and the more she reads the more she is convinced these are early signs.

Are we panicking for no reason? Or is this something we should monitor?

I'd also add that he is learning two languages simultaneously. My mom, who speaks to him only in our native tongue, takes care of him during the days and we speak to him in English. He says words from both language. That's why I think he is a little behind with his speech.

I'd appreciate some opinions thanks.
 
Let me first say the that this thread is about a journey, my family's journey with my son who appears to be on the Autistic Spectrum. He has not been officially diagnosed, as it takes forever to get an appointment for screening. He will be turning 3 at the end of June.

Nothing Physical...
My son was born about 5 days earlier than his expected due date and has never shown any signs of physical issues other than being in the low percentiles for high and weight. No worries there he is just a little guy.

If I would have saw the signs, they would have opened my eyes...
First sign that something wasn't quite right. He doesn't process pain like a normal person. He never cried during his immunizations or other shots. Usually babies freak out when someone stabs them with a needle. I was a dummy. I thought I had a little bad ass on my hands.

Second sign, he never smiled at us. We would smile and play peek-a-boo, nothing. We would tickle him and he would laugh and smile. But he would never return a smile. In fact, he would always have a grimace (grumpy look) on his face. Kids should never just be sitting there looking pissed off. They should return smiles and be able to process emotions. To this day my son does not process emotions like other kids his age and young. And he does not return smiles.

Third sign, he doesn't respond to his name. I'm pretty sure he knows his name. But when you call his name he won't look at you no matter how many times you say his name. However, sometimes he will spontaneously look at you after the first time you say his name. We were fools. We thought he was just off in his own little world, even after the Doctor confirmed there was nothing wrong with his hearing.

Fourth sign, he doesn't look me in the eyes when he responds to me. This is another issue that we ignored, because he would look us in the eyes all other times. We chalked it up to shyness.

Fifth sign, he plays in parallel. This is a tricky one. My son will not engage other kids in play. He will, however, sit next to other kids and play by himself. The only kids he will play with are his brothers. But he will never engage in pretend play with them.

Sixth sign, he doesn't show affection like other children. This is a weird one. My son doesn't give kisses. He allows you to kiss him, if you ask for a kiss. But he only allows kisses sometimes.

I have a whole list that goes on and on. But I'm not going to post all of them.

The Journey Begins...
Just before my son turned 2 we had him evaluated by the State's Infants and Toddlers (InT) program, because he exhibited abnormal social behaviors compared to his older brother and other neighborhood kids his age. InT came out and said he was just a little behind on his social skills, but his communication skills were very low for his age. So the State put him on their speech program. Which was one of the best things that could have happened for him.

We also put him in a 2yr old preschool program. While in the program we would get reports from the school that he was doing fine. Then during the Parent Teacher conference, the teach wrote up a report that made it sound like our kid was autistic and that he should repeat the 2yr old program. We immediately flung ourselves in a state of denial. How could this be right we asked ourselves. Our child does not act like this at home or with the Speech therapist. Even the Speech therapist baulked at the report from the school. Not long after receiving that report we signed him up for the 3yr old program, after my wife and the director agree that he could move forward. However, 2 weeks ago we were told that my son could not move to the 3yr old class the following year and that the 2 yr old class was full. Effectively he was kicked out of Preschool, for the following year.

Now what? Well we started taking the assessment a little more seriously. We started monitoring our child's behavior more closely. With 3 boys (under the age of 5) running around the house that is extremely hard. We started noticing things that didn't seem typical. We started doing some reading and noticed that a lot of his quirky behavior were signs of autism. So my wife and I started talking to people who had autistic kids about how to find out more about it. There are several checklist online, tons of books, and websites that have loads of information.

Doctor, Doctor....
OK, so we did an abundance of self diagnoses. But does that count, some what. We had to find out if our son is on the spectrum or not. Or does he have something completely different. Well the insurance agency was no help when I called them. The first they told me was find someone who could help me. So we contacted 2 facilities that perform the autism tests and both of them told us we wouldn't be seen till late summer or the fall. Also, neither one is in our local area. This wouldn't have been an issue, but the state was stopping Speech for my son because he is not considered to be extremely delayed anymore.

Lucky for us my wife found a person that is opening a private practice that specializes in pediatric development, locally. Our first appointment is on April 15th. This will most likely not be covered by insurance, but I don't care. This is the most important step. If we know the issue is, we can get our son the help he needs.

I will post more info later and hopefully have some videos to share. I hope this will help others.

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Seriously though OP... Your child sounds in good shape and in good hands. He just sounds different and would probably be the poster child for Apple's 90s "Be different" campaign.

After all, Autistic people are the majority now...
 
I'd also add that he is learning two languages simultaneously. My mom, who speaks to him only in our native tongue, takes care of him during the days and we speak to him in English. He says words from both language. That's why I think he is a little behind with his speech.

I'd appreciate some opinions thanks.

Dual language learning like that often delays speaking, but they're learning twice as much as other children. I did a bit of research about it a while back. My boyfriend was spoken to in English and Spanish as a baby and he became slow at speaking. It was suggested for only one language to be spoken to him, which happened to be English. People still flowed in and out of Spanish in conversations but never directly towards him. It took him till he was nearly 20 to pick up on understanding Spanish. He still struggles with sentence structure and word pronunciation. Ordering food is still the easiest for him.
 
So I haven't read the full thread so I apologize if any of what I write comes across as immature, uneducated, or insensitive in any way.

My son just turned 2 years old on March 3rd. He doesn't speak much, or not as much as other kids around his age. For example his cousin who is exactly an year older was speaking in full sentences at age 2. Still wife and I are not too concerned because we know some kids learn a little later.

He says his colors, some #s, about a dozen to 20 words, and asks for food.

But the concern is that at his 2 year check up the doctor asked if he stares randomly at nothing in particular. I've noticed it very rarely so technically the answer is yes.

We also read something about kids walking on tip-toes. I've seen him do that sometimes. He often likes to walk over his toys and when he gets off of them he continues to walk as if he is stepping over toys still. Looks like he is wearing invisible heels.

I mean that's it. Just those 2 things. Slow to speak for his age and tip toes. But it's worried my wife and the more she reads the more she is convinced these are early signs.

Are we panicking for no reason? Or is this something we should monitor?

I'd also add that he is learning two languages simultaneously. My mom, who speaks to him only in our native tongue, takes care of him during the days and we speak to him in English. He says words from both language. That's why I think he is a little behind with his speech.

I'd appreciate some opinions thanks.
I could see the two language thing delaying his speech. Have him evaluated if you're not sure and put the speculation to rest. We had my son evaluated at two on a recommendation from a pre school teacher who had a severely autistic daughter. He's high functioning and goes to a mainstream school although he still struggles in social situations and has a hard time making friends but he's done really well.

Get him evaluated would be my advice, if he's on the spectrum then early intervention is great, if not you'll put your minds at ease.
 
I could see the two language thing delaying his speech. Have him evaluated if you're not sure and put the speculation to rest. We had my son evaluated at two on a recommendation from a pre school teacher who had a severely autistic daughter. He's high functioning and goes to a mainstream school although he still struggles in social situations and has a hard time making friends but he's done really well.

Get him evaluated would be my advice, if he's on the spectrum then early intervention is great, if not you'll put your minds at ease.

Thanks.

So to start we ask his pediatrician to recommend a test or a specialist? At his 2 year check up, the doc asked a question about him zoning off and staring at nothing in particular but didn't go any further nor did he recommend any further evaluation.

Reading up more on it, it seems like this is a "sign" if a kid does it for minutes or sustained period of time. At most my son does it for 10-15 seconds.
 
Thanks.

So to start we ask his pediatrician to recommend a test or a specialist? At his 2 year check up, the doc asked a question about him zoning off and staring at nothing in particular but didn't go any further nor did he recommend any further evaluation.

Reading up more on it, it seems like this is a "sign" if a kid does it for minutes or sustained period of time. At most my son does it for 10-15 seconds.
Yeah start with the pediatrician, maybe they'll tell you not to worry.

My son was evaluated through our County, the therapists will come out to your house and do some tests with him (basically play with him). Then a Specialist will read the report and make a diagnosis. Ours was all paid for by the County.

IF you receive a diagnosis of ASD then the therapy starts, they came right to our house when he was that age.

This was a scary time for us but we're so glad we went through with it, our son is better off because of the work he has done.

Remember, it sounds like there's a good chance your son is typical, especially if the Pediatrician didn't recommend an evaluation but clearly this is on your mind so if it was me I'd rather know than worry about what might be. That just me though
 
As a teacher and parent I just want to say that you parents of children on the autism spectrum deserve medals.

I know you are just doing your job as loving parents but don't downplay how much you are giving of yourself to try and give them the same chance as happiness as other kids. I teach quite a few kids on the spectrum and I have to shamefully admit that sometimes the bell goes and I think "thank f*** he's someone elses problem now". It's incredibly draining, frustrating and pretty much soulcrushingly unrewarding most of the time. You think you've made a breakthrough one day but next lesson they are eating their worksheet and banging their head on the desk because you promised to show a Horrible Histories video at the end of the lesson but Youtube suddenly isn't working. Raising them full time must be just something else entirely.

I have a four month old son and although it is far too early to make a diagnosis either way, he certainly isn't showing any of the telltale signs. He is very engaged with others, smiles back when you smile at him, chuckles, gives sloppy kisses, loves hugs. And he screamed his lungs out after his vaccinations.

It's an incredibly draining job nonetheless and honestly, the smiles, laughs, kisses and cuddles are the only thing that sustain you through the exhaustion. For parentsd of autistic children it must be incredibly hard to feel like there is that emotional bubble between you. Again, I know you're just doing what any loving parent would do, but again, you should feel incredibly proud of the job you're doing nonetheless, and you shouldn't feel terrible about yourself on the days when it just gets on top of you emotionally.
 
Yeah start with the pediatrician, maybe they'll tell you not to worry.

My son was evaluated through our County, the therapists will come out to your house and do some tests with him (basically play with him). Then a Specialist will read the report and make a diagnosis. Ours was all paid for by the County.

IF you receive a diagnosis of ASD then the therapy starts, they came right to our house when he was that age.

This was a scary time for us but we're so glad we went through with it, our son is better off because of the work he has done.

Remember, it sounds like there's a good chance your son is typical, especially if the Pediatrician didn't recommend an evaluation but clearly this is on your mind so if it was me I'd rather know than worry about what might be. That just me though

Thanks I really appreciate your thoughts and advice.
 
For whats its worth, I've been monitoring my son very closely (he's 5 weeks old) thanks to this thread and GAF's autism community opening my eyes over the years. He hasn't shown any big telltale signs as of yet but its obviously still real early.
 
As a teacher and parent I just want to say that you parents of children on the autism spectrum deserve medals....

Teachers play such a huge role in our sons' lives. The kindness and help they provide makes parenting so much easier. One of my son's favorite people in the world is the teacher's aid. He absolutely loves her.

Next he will be going to regular kindergarten. I know he will lose focus a lot and it will be difficult on the teacher. Is there anything that we should ask for to help him succeed?

Also, thank you for being a teacher and being part of the team.
 
So I haven't read the full thread so I apologize if any of what I write comes across as immature, uneducated, or insensitive in any way.

My son just turned 2 years old on March 3rd. He doesn't speak much, or not as much as other kids around his age. For example his cousin who is exactly an year older was speaking in full sentences at age 2. Still wife and I are not too concerned because we know some kids learn a little later.

He says his colors, some #s, about a dozen to 20 words, and asks for food.

But the concern is that at his 2 year check up the doctor asked if he stares randomly at nothing in particular. I've noticed it very rarely so technically the answer is yes.

We also read something about kids walking on tip-toes. I've seen him do that sometimes. He often likes to walk over his toys and when he gets off of them he continues to walk as if he is stepping over toys still. Looks like he is wearing invisible heels.

I mean that's it. Just those 2 things. Slow to speak for his age and tip toes. But it's worried my wife and the more she reads the more she is convinced these are early signs.

Are we panicking for no reason? Or is this something we should monitor?

I'd also add that he is learning two languages simultaneously. My mom, who speaks to him only in our native tongue, takes care of him during the days and we speak to him in English. He says words from both language. That's why I think he is a little behind with his speech.

I'd appreciate some opinions thanks.
I would have him evaluated, there is no harm in it. My son is technically not autistic (although would have been by earlier definitions) but had a significant speech delay and trouble with social skills. My wife and I started noticing about the age two that he wasn't progressing in his language. We had everyone telling us not to worry and that X's kid didn't start talking until they were 3 or whatever, but we had him evaluated and got a speech therapist and then he went to a pre-kindergarten program for kids with special needs. He still struggles but will be going to regular kindergarten next year and he has progressed a lot.
It's possible your son is perfectly normal and doesn't need help, but there is no harm in getting an evaluation.
 
I would have him evaluated, there is no harm in it. My son is technically not autistic (although would have been by earlier definitions) but had a significant speech delay and trouble with social skills. My wife and I started noticing about the age two that he wasn't progressing in his language. We had everyone telling us not to worry and that X's kid didn't start talking until they were 3 or whatever, but we had him evaluated and got a speech therapist and then he went to a pre-kindergarten program for kids with special needs. He still struggles but will be going to regular kindergarten next year and he has progressed a lot.
It's possible your son is perfectly normal and doesn't need help, but there is no harm in getting an evaluation.

Thanks! I used the following screener to get some initial understanding:

https://www.autismspeaks.org/what-autism/diagnosis/mchat

And thankfully his risk score came out to 0 which put me at ease. Had his mother do it separately without talking to me about it first and she also came to the same score/conclusion.

I'm still going to work with his pediatrician to see if we need further testing and evaluations.
 
For whats its worth, I've been monitoring my son very closely (he's 5 weeks old) thanks to this thread and GAF's autism community opening my eyes over the years. He hasn't shown any big telltale signs as of yet but its obviously still real early.

I didn't notice it on my Son until around a year. I think? I even had him diagnosed when he was 2-3 and results came up he's not. Which I knew was bullshit because the person spent a couple of hours with him. He's now 9 and he's a high functioning autistic.

He was speech delayed. We held him back and year and has a ton of people to help him socially. He's doing really good in 2nd grade now.
 
Happy Autism Awareness Day... I'm aware of autism only because my son has autism. I had no idea about autism or Aspergers until my son was diagnosed. Then I started searching out as much information as possible.
Since no one ever seemed to share with me their experience until I searched it out. I am very open about my son, with him and anyone who would like to know more about autism.
Today I found some autism podcast and will check them out. I really only found them because apple is promoting autism apps, books, and podcasts today. And podcast recommendation would be appreciated.
 
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