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[Pachimari]

Did she bring some dude over to your place still?

No. She texted me yesterday that she had been here, but nobody clicked the door bell, so I don't even believe that.
She have some stuff here, that I told her she can pick up, but she's confusing, as she have both said, that she don't want it at all, and that she will pick some up.
So I have just placed it in my stock room for now.

I also don't believe she got a new boyfriend the same day I left her. But I don't even care about that stuff.

I miss her during the day though, I'm just trying to keep a little busy.

 

[davepoobond]

No. She texted me yesterday that she had been here, but nobody clicked the door bell, so I don't even believe that.
She have some stuff here, that I told her she can pick up, but she's confusing, as she have both said, that she don't want it at all, and that she will pick some up.
So I have just placed it in my stock room for now.

I also don't believe she got a new boyfriend the same day I left her. But I don't even care about that stuff.

I miss her during the day though, I'm just trying to keep a little busy.

I see. Makes more sense now, I thought you meant they were going to have date night at your place instead of just picking stuff up.

But yeah, instantly getting another boyfriend is pretty suspect, but no point in belaboring it.

 

[Pachimari]

The last time we broke up, she said she had gotten a boyfriend, but then admitted it was just something she made up to hurt me. I suspect it is the same thing now.

 

[gaiages]

Good for you, Madridista :3

 

[PflargBlarg]

What does it mean if somebody's told me they could only see an overweight or obese woman being with me? I am not overweight myself, and am relatively fit. I am however a 29 year old virgin, and have never had a girlfriend.

When I challenged it, he said that that's just 'real life'. When I complained that he really thought I was that bad, he said I was starting to sound like a dick. I asked why, and he said 'because it's as if you think you're better than that'.

This is my closest friend, so he's not going to bullshit me at the end of the day. I appreciate honesty, and would rather be told the truth than fed a load of lies that build up false hope. He kept saying that she'll probably have a great personality, and that all the bigger women tend to have nicer personalities anyway. Slim, good looking women are ' bitchier, and tend to have uglier personalities'. The whole exchange left me feeling really low about myself, though. At the end of the day, I want to be physically attracted to a woman. I am fit, so would expect my partner to be fit also, or at least a healthy weight.

More to the point, I am nearly 30 and still a virgin. What the fuck. Wouldn't most people have topped themselves by now?

So not only is your 'closest friend' a giant asshole, he's also a blatant sexist.
Just remember that it's easiest for your close friends to hurt you, because you trust them. This guy is not your friend, whatever you may think.

 

[Revoh]

Hey GAF, need some help over here.
I've been going out with this girl two nights in a row now, we hung out in a mutual friend's house both times. We talked, we flirted, we kissed. Everything's going swell.

Time to leave the house and drive her to her place. The first night we started making out outside her house, it got intense so I tried to take her to my place instead but she said it was "too soon". Ok, no biggie.

Second night, that's when I think I fucked up. I believe I should've take her directly to my place without even asking but I kinda wimped out and took her to her place again. We started making out, this time was a lot more sexual. I propose her to take her to my place to chill and she again said she wasn't ready.. wtf.

I don't have much experience with stuff like this, I never had to "try" so hard to fuck a girl that I like and I know she likes me too. I like this girl, something about shy girls turn something on me but I don't know how to proceed anymore. I can't wait for her to decide "Ok, tonight's the night". I'm willing to give it another chance and then bail if it ends with the same shit.. how do I act now? Should I stop talking to her and leave her reach out to me? Should I take the lead no matter what? (That feels rapey)

 

[GK86]

Umm, if she says she isn't ready, you taking her straight to your place isn't going to change her mind.

 

[Advocatus Diaboli]

I don't have much experience with stuff like this, I never had to "try" so hard to fuck a girl that I like and I know she likes me too. I like this girl, something about shy girls turn something on me but I don't know how to proceed anymore. I can't wait for her to decide "Ok, tonight's the night". I'm willing to give it another chance and then bail if it ends with the same shit.. how do I act now? Should I stop talking to her and leave her reach out to me? Should I take the lead no matter what? (That feels rapey)

First off, if anything triggers the "that feels rapey" alarm bells in your head, stop. Next, don't paint yourself as "weak" or "wimping out." You found a girl you like. She likes you. You're already expressing physical attraction in a concrete, direct way. Respecting her desire to take things more slowly is a sign of strength, as you're valuing her sexual autonomy. Nor is this a case of you not demonstrating your interest. I'm sure she knows you want her.

Anyway, why did you have to take her to your place? (As in, I don't see anything wrong with making out at hers.) You need to decide what you want. It seems she's not down for crossing certain lines during casual hookups, but there's clearly some chemistry there. And, let me point out that she's not shy: you're already back at her place and making out on the first night you two met.

If you want to proceed with her, you should take her out on a proper date (since you haven't done that yet). You can invite her back to your place for a bottle of wine afterwards. Feel free to text her and state that you had a great time this weekend and that you'd like to take her out for drinks on Tuesday. Conversely, if all you want is a FWB-style arrangement, this probably isn't the right girl for you.

 

[Liu Kang Baking A Pie]

Hey GAF, need some help over here.
I've been going out with this girl two nights in a row now, we hung out in a mutual friend's house both times. We talked, we flirted, we kissed. Everything's going swell.

Time to leave the house and drive her to her place. The first night we started making out outside her house, it got intense so I tried to take her to my place instead but she said it was "too soon". Ok, no biggie.

Second night, that's when I think I fucked up. I believe I should've take her directly to my place without even asking but I kinda wimped out and took her to her place again. We started making out, this time was a lot more sexual. I propose her to take her to my place to chill and she again said she wasn't ready.. wtf.

I don't have much experience with stuff like this, I never had to "try" so hard to fuck a girl that I like and I know she likes me too. I like this girl, something about shy girls turn something on me but I don't know how to proceed anymore. I can't wait for her to decide "Ok, tonight's the night". I'm willing to give it another chance and then bail if it ends with the same shit.. how do I act now? Should I stop talking to her and leave her reach out to me? Should I take the lead no matter what? (That feels rapey)

What's with the pressuring to take her to your place?

Why can't you just listen to her? Your pressuring is exactly why she wants to wait. Look at you. She sees right through you.

 

[Revoh]

First off, if anything triggers the "that feels rapey" alarm bells in your head, stop. Next, don't paint yourself as "weak" or "wimping out." You found a girl you like. She likes you. You're already expressing physical attraction in a concrete, direct way. Respecting her desire to take things more slowly is a sign of strength, as you're valuing her sexual autonomy. Nor is this a case of you not demonstrating your interest. I'm sure she knows you want her.

Anyway, why did you have to take her to your place? (As in, I don't see anything wrong with making out at hers.) You need to decide what you want. It seems she's not down for crossing certain lines during casual hookups, but there's clearly some chemistry there. And, let me point out that she's not shy: you're already back at her place and making out on the first night you two met.

If you want to proceed with her, you should take her out on a proper date (since you haven't done that yet). You can invite her back to your place for a bottle of wine afterwards. Feel free to text her and state that you had a great time this weekend and that you'd like to take her out for drinks on Tuesday. Conversely, if all you want is a FWB-style arrangement, this probably isn't the right girl for you.

Thanks for this post.
She clearly knows I like and want her.
Before all of this happened (The two nights this weekend) I already told her that I like her and asked to go out on a date next week, so that's going to go down soon.

Yeah, I'm mostly looking for a FWB girl, I think I should be direct with her and tell her I'm not looking for a relationship so we can both be sure what we want. I'm not ready to start a relationship right now, but she probably isn't either because she broke up with his BF a month ago.

Just to clarify, we were making out in my car outside her place, she lives with her sister and her mother, so yeah.. having sex there is probably not going to happen right away.

Edit:

What's with the pressuring to take her to your place?

Why can't you just listen to her? Your pressuring is exactly why she wants to wait. Look at you. She sees right through you.

I did listen to her. I just asked her, she said no, and I said OK, I didn't push it. Is that wrong?

 

[electricshake]

Thanks for this post.
She clearly knows I like and want her.
Before all of this happened (The two nights this weekend) I already told her that I like her and asked to go out on a date next week, so that's going to go down soon.

Yeah, I'm mostly looking for a FWB girl, I think I should be direct with her and tell her I'm not looking for a relationship so we can both be sure what we want. I'm not ready to start a relationship right now, but she probably isn't either because she broke up with his BF a month ago.

Just to clarify, we were making out in my car outside her place, she lives with her sister and her mother, so yeah.. having sex there is probably not going to happen right away.

Edit:


I did listen to her. I just asked her, she said no, and I said OK, I didn't push it. Is that wrong?

No it's not wrong, but not being willing to wait until she is ready is. But you guys literally just met, no? Why are you in such a rush?

 

[Liu Kang Baking A Pie]

I did listen to her. I just asked her, she said no, and I said OK, I didn't push it. Is that wrong?

Nah, you did fine, but your first post just seems like you're pushing too hard to rush this when it's just been two dates. She seems into you, you don't have to strategically go to your place or anything. She's just taking it slower than you. Let her be ready when she's ready. It's more fun when everyone's comfortable anyway.

 

[ATF487]

Is it lazy to ask someone for drinks as the second date, when the first was the same thing?

I've got decent ideas for the third one if it went well (maybe a music festival during the weekend if she's free) but I can't find too many interesting things in the city late on a Tuesday/Wednesday.

Maybe I'll ask if she wants to go to this brewpub, they have flatbreads and cheeses and stuff, more casual than a formal sitdown dinner.

 

[electricshake]

Is it lazy to ask someone for drinks as the second date, when the first was the same thing?

I've got decent ideas for the third one if it went well (maybe a music festival during the weekend if she's free) but I can't find too many interesting things in the city late on a Tuesday/Wednesday.

Maybe I'll ask if she wants to go to this brewpub, they have flatbreads and cheeses and stuff, more casual than a formal sitdown dinner.

Not at all, going to the pub is a classic date option and I've used it many a time (and several times with the same person). Doing a pub quiz is a good idea for a date but just drinks is fine too.

 

[Revoh]

No it's not wrong, but not being willing to wait until she is ready is. But you guys literally just met, no? Why are you in such a rush?

We met two weeks ago but just recently started talking one on one, back then it was mostly when we were out with friends.

Nah, you did fine, but your first post just seems like you're pushing too hard to rush this when it's just been two dates. She seems into you, you don't have to strategically go to your place or anything. She's just taking it slower than you. Let her be ready when she's ready. It's more fun when everyone's comfortable anyway.

Yeah, everything's all right now though, she texted me just a few minutes ago and said she wants me but she prefer to take things slowly, also said she didn't feel my place was the place to go because I also live with my parents and she won't feel comfortable having sex there, me, being the idiot I usually am, completely forgot about this.
Next time though, it's clearly obvious what should I do and where should I go to, and that's probably gonna happen tonight as she's free to go out with me.

 

[Pachimari]

Oh shit, she just came by with McDonalds food. I told her to leave, then she got super upset. Guess she don't have a new boyfriend after all.

Oh man, now I feel sad for rejecting her. Need to hit the bottle.

 

[War Peaceman]

You made the right move
McDonald's is disgusting, she might as well have defecated on your porch.
Also she sounds completely awful, you deserve better.

Careful with the alcohol!

 

[davepoobond]

Oh shit, she just came by with McDonalds food. I told her to leave, then she got super upset. Guess she don't have a new boyfriend after all.

Oh man, now I feel sad for rejecting her. Need to hit the bottle.

If she really wanted to get back together she would have brought a better burger


Also drinking is not a very good answer here...

 

[gaiages]

Oh shit, she just came by with McDonalds food. I told her to leave, then she got super upset. Guess she don't have a new boyfriend after all.

Oh man, now I feel sad for rejecting her. Need to hit the bottle.

McDonalds? Please, that's the lowest of the low right there. An insult.

You shouldn't feel sad for rejecting her; even with these last few posts it sounds like she was just trying to manipulate you and make you feel bad. You feeling sad is just letting her have what she wants :/

 

[Pachimari]

If she really wanted to get back together she would have brought a better burger


Also drinking is not a very good answer here...

No I just drank very little and then fell asleep. Now I'm ready for a new day.

 

[Zaraki_Kenpachi]

Oh shit, she just came by with McDonalds food. I told her to leave, then she got super upset. Guess she don't have a new boyfriend after all.

Oh man, now I feel sad for rejecting her. Need to hit the bottle.

You feel bad for rejecting her? What?

 

[Pachimari]

Yeah I don't know. She were also a very sweet girl and I can feel she genuinely felt a lot for me. Of course I feel sad for her.

But I'm moving forward. Gonna go to my mothers bday today.

 

[TylerD]

Fun weekend!

Met a girl through OKC and had our first date Friday night. Conversation was easy and everything went great except for me creating an awkward moment at the end by missing the turn for her street. She asked if I planned on taking her home or if I was going to murder her now. We kind of botched the good night kiss\hug at first in my car but it ended up being a kiss that turned rather aggressive on her part. I didn't really feel anything and wasn't sure about her then.

She ended up texting me Saturday afternoon saying she had a really good time and invited me over Saturday night. I took over some steaks and sweet potatoes to make fries for dinner around 7. As soon as I saw her, the spark was there. She is waiting on an ordered bed frame and box spring so her bed is sitting in the living room in front of the TV... Very convenient! Her roommate is away for the Summer too... Long story short, we had a REALLY great time multiple times and I left at noon Sunday.

I was also able to get the gorgeous former pageant girl that I talked about being worth chasing to come back around (she had a really difficult week and apologized for falling off the face of the Earth) and we've been in regular contact for several days and have a date scheduled later this month.

 

[Sky Chief]

I just moved from Dallas to Cali two months ago.

So yesterday I go and try a new coffee shop and the girl behind the counter is just stunning. I am pretty conservative in my style and she is all tatted up (normally not a fan) but it really suits her and I think she is just gorgeous.

So she starts taking my order and we start talking and we are both smiling more and more and the chemistry is insane. She starts like giggling a lot and fidgeting and I have butterflies in my stomach. We're discussing how I'm new in town and she introduces herself and I do likewise and we're really flirting a lot. So then I'm paying and I'm about to ask her out and when she puts the credit card slip down I see she has a very simple ring (not gold and no diamonds or anything) on her left ring finger and it just kind of takes me aback so I end up just paying and leaving. But it really doesn't seem like a wedding or engagement ring at all. Do girls ever wear rings on that finger if they are not married/engaged?

What should I do? The chemistry was definitely there and if anything she seemed even more taken aback by it than I was. What is a good way to bring up the ring and its meaning? Don't want to be really awkward or anything.

 

[ClosingADoor]

What should I do? The chemistry was definitely there and if anything she seemed even more taken aback by it than I was. What is a good way to bring up the ring and its meaning? Don't want to be really awkward or anything.

Just exchange numbers and ask her out next time. If she is married or in a relationship, she will tell you. No need to bring it up.

 

[GK86]

I agree with Closing. My ex wore a ring on the left ring finger (before and during the relationship). Looked like an engagement ring too.

 

[Sky Chief]

Cool, thanks guys

 

[Coda]

I just moved from Dallas to Cali two months ago.

So yesterday I go and try a new coffee shop and the girl behind the counter is just stunning. I am pretty conservative in my style and she is all tatted up (normally not a fan) but it really suits her and I think she is just gorgeous.

So she starts taking my order and we start talking and we are both smiling more and more and the chemistry is insane. She starts like giggling a lot and fidgeting and I have butterflies in my stomach. We're discussing how I'm new in town and she introduces herself and I do likewise and we're really flirting a lot. So then I'm paying and I'm about to ask her out and when she puts the credit card slip down I see she has a very simple ring (not gold and no diamonds or anything) on her left ring finger and it just kind of takes me aback so I end up just paying and leaving. But it really doesn't seem like a wedding or engagement ring at all. Do girls ever wear rings on that finger if they are not married/engaged?

What should I do? The chemistry was definitely there and if anything she seemed even more taken aback by it than I was. What is a good way to bring up the ring and its meaning? Don't want to be really awkward or anything.

Whatever you do (not saying you will but word to the wise) don't bring up her tattoos in conversation or make it obvious that you are attracted to that. I have a friend who has no tattoos who has told me before that he'd love to get with a girl who was all tatted up but then proceeded to say he wouldn't marry her or anything. I (being one who has a decent amount of tattoos) told him that he was looking at it all wrong and probably wouldn't get with that girl because his attitude towards it would be obvious. It's more of a fetish because he doesn't have any and there's nothing more unattractive to a girl with tattoos when she realizes that motive. It has nothing to do with him not having any tattoos but rather his attitude.

Like I said, not trying to say that you would make it obvious but it's clearly something you're not used to so just almost act like they're not there and go with the flow as you normally would with someone else. You should go for this lady though, she sounds like a babe.

 

[Astral]

GAF I have no idea what the fuck to do. I'm talking to this girl who I really, really like. I like her like no other and she says she really likes me. However she recently discovered she might have some feelings for an old friend and now she wants to figure them out before we go out anymore. Except she's also hanging out with him because they're friends. So she's basically making me wait while she hangs out with this guy. She says she really, really likes me but she's now confused. I know GAF is gonna tear me a new one but I believe her. We still talk on the phone for hours every day. I honestly don't think she's lying. We've had plans for a while but now they're on hold because of this guy. Waiting is really fucking hard. Even though I'm scared she'll choose him, I wish she'd just make up her mind already even if it kills me. Every day feels three times as long. I know I should probably move on or be talking to another girl in the meantime but I honestly don't want to. I have literally zero interest in pursuing another girl at the moment. What the fuck do I do?

 

[Zaraki_Kenpachi]

GAF I have no idea what the fuck to do. I'm talking to this girl who I really, really like. I like her like no other and she says she really likes me. However she recently discovered she might have some feelings for an old friend and now she wants to figure them out before we go out anymore. Except she's also hanging out with him because they're friends. So she's basically making me wait while she hangs out with this guy. She says she really, really likes me but she's now confused. I know GAF is gonna tear me a new one but I believe her. We still talk on the phone for hours every day. I honestly don't think she's lying. We've had plans for a while but now they're on hold because of this guy. Waiting is really fucking hard. Even though I'm scared she'll choose him, I wish she'd just make up her mind already even if it kills me. Every day feels three times as long. I know I should probably move on or be talking to another girl in the meantime but I honestly don't want to. I have literally zero interest in pursuing another girl at the moment. What the fuck do I do?

She's not interested move on. Don't wait for people, break it off.

 

[Coda]

GAF I have no idea what the fuck to do. I'm talking to this girl who I really, really like. I like her like no other and she says she really likes me. However she recently discovered she might have some feelings for an old friend and now she wants to figure them out before we go out anymore. Except she's also hanging out with him because they're friends. So she's basically making me wait while she hangs out with this guy. She says she really, really likes me but she's now confused. I know GAF is gonna tear me a new one but I believe her. We still talk on the phone for hours every day. I honestly don't think she's lying. We've had plans for a while but now they're on hold because of this guy. Waiting is really fucking hard. Even though I'm scared she'll choose him, I wish she'd just make up her mind already even if it kills me. Every day feels three times as long. I know I should probably move on or be talking to another girl in the meantime but I honestly don't want to. I have literally zero interest in pursuing another girl at the moment. What the fuck do I do?

I've been in a similar situation before, she eventually went to see if she still had feelings for this other dude and decided that she did and dropped me. Not saying that will happen here but girls (no matter how much you think they're being truthful) have a way of being indecisive. I think right now she knows she can have you, so you may want to subvert those expectations a little bit and make yourself not so available. I'm not saying completely ignore her but let her know that she's not the only one (even if it's a lie). This is the game we all hate, but sometimes you have to play it to keep up.

 

[Jokab]

She's not interested move on. Don't wait for people, break it off.

I think you're making this assumption too fast and with too little information. While I agree with not waiting around, I don't think it's as simple as she's not interested. She might be truthful.

In any case, I agree with LUCKY n WILD here.

 

[GK86]

You are the back-up plan, dude. Move on.

 

[Astral]

I forgot to mention the guy likes her too. With the things she's told me (for example she's cried about it), she'd have to be an awful vile piece of scum to be lying. I believe her. I really like this girl and really want it to work. Her thinking there's someone else kinda feels like it'll make her rush into the other guy since just coworkers being friendly to me bothers her. And if I back down now then this guy probably gets her for sure and FUCK this guy.

 

[Badosh]

You are the back-up plan, dude. Move on.

Pretty much this.

Move on, let her figure it out.

I'd never want to be someone's second choice.

 

[Zaraki_Kenpachi]

I think you're making this assumption too fast and with too little information. While I agree with not waiting around, I don't think it's as simple as she's not interested. She might be truthful.

In any case, I agree with LUCKY n WILD here.

She's not interested when you're at best a backup plan. There's nothing to gain to stay.

 

[gaiages]

Astral, I was in a similar situation with a dude once (see, guys can be indecisive too ;D), and I ended up getting dropped... but of course, he didn't want to tell me as such until I finally got mad/frustrated enough to confront him on it. Honestly, your best bet is just to move on; if she comes around, that's cool, but don't wait on her and don't treat her like she's your sun and stars, or whatever. Limit your contact with her, at the least, cut it off entirely if you can't handle just talking to her on a normal friendly basis.

EDIT of an edit: I misread something, carry on.

 

[norm9]

She's not interested when you're at best a backup plan. There's nothing to gain to stay.

Yup to this and a couple more above. But that's not what you want to hear so you're going to stick around anyways and keep texting and keep waiting, when you should move your life along. More fish, bro.

 

[GK86]

I forgot to mention the guy likes her too. With the things she's told me (for example she's cried about it), she'd have to be an awful vile piece of scum to be lying. I believe her. I really like this girl and really want it to work. Her thinking there's someone else kinda feels like it'll make her rush into the other guy since just coworkers being friendly to me bothers her. And if I back down now then this guy probably gets her for sure and FUCK this guy.

Wanting to get with someone because you don't want someone else to have them, is a terrible attitude.

 

[Astral]

Wanting to get with someone because you don't want someone else to have them, is a terrible attitude.

It's not like I'll sabotage their relationship. If she decides she's happy with him then good for her. I just don't like him. I guess I'll give it a week or two. I don't know. I don't like the idea of giving up. I still don't feel like actively seeking other people but if a girl comes along in the meantime, I won't dismiss her.

 

[gaiages]

It's not like I'll sabotage their relationship. If she decides she's happy with him then good for her. I just don't like him. I guess I'll give it a week or two. I don't know. I don't like the idea of giving up. I still don't feel like actively seeking other people but if a girl comes along in the meantime, I won't dismiss her.

You don't have to seek someone else, you could... just be single and not trying to go after anyone whatsoever, including her.

You really should just stop giving her so much attention. No hours long phone calls and all that.

 

[stn]

The golden rule is you never want to be at someone else's mercy. That means you drop her and find someone else. If she likes you enough, she'll come around. You're doing the opposite of what you should be doing, Astral. There's a reason why people become interested in those who do not wait around for them, because they assume those people are confident, not desperate, and full of abundance. You're not showing that by hanging around her. Stop the bleeding, dude.

EDIT: Whether she really likes you or not, you have to be decisive for yourself. No girl actually wants a guy who waits on her to make decisions. As for the long amount of phone calls? Dude, you're being a comforter. You need to put aside what you think she's saying and analyze the situation strictly on the facts. They are:

-She is hanging out with someone else at your expense
-You are wasting time
-She is making you wait
-You have shown you're okay being 2nd place
-You have shown lack of confidence and desperation
-You are allowing emotion and phone calls to overshadow the facts

This is a no-brainer, man. If you hang around more and she picks the other guy, you have only yourself to blame. You need to tell her that you're going to explore other options and not wait around, but that she's free to come back to you if she chooses.

 

[ant_]

I forgot to mention the guy likes her too. With the things she's told me (for example she's cried about it), she'd have to be an awful vile piece of scum to be lying. I believe her. I really like this girl and really want it to work. Her thinking there's someone else kinda feels like it'll make her rush into the other guy since just coworkers being friendly to me bothers her. And if I back down now then this guy probably gets her for sure and FUCK this guy.

Some people lie not because they are horrible people, but because they are too nice. She might just not want to hurt you and doesn't know how to tell you.

I'd bail out man. it's not worth the emotional turmoil it's putting you through.

edit - completely agree with the above post.

 

[NeOak]

It's not like I'll sabotage their relationship. If she decides she's happy with him then good for her. I just don't like him. I guess I'll give it a week or two. I don't know. I don't like the idea of giving up. I still don't feel like actively seeking other people but if a girl comes along in the meantime, I won't dismiss her.

Bail.

Bail.

Bail.

You don't like him because she is with him. Period.

Giving up? You're trying to climb a wall with your bare hands man. A lot of us have been there and suffered for being stubborn as you are at the moment.

If she were a really good friend, she would tell you to look for someone else after picking up your interest. She hasn't, so she is using you as the "in-between".

But hey, if you don't want to listen: o7 good luck. Just remember that time wasted doesn't come back.

 

[Astral]

Sigh. GAF is always right. I'll try to limit contact from now on. If she comes to me, great. If not, well I don't know.

 

[FaintColt388301]

Also, Astral you said that she doesn't even like your coworkers being friendly with you. That and this whole wait for me while I try to get with other guy nonsense sounds like you're dodging a bullet.

 

[Zonic]

Hmm, think I might finally have an idea for our third date. We were talking about exercising and she mentioned that she likes to swim. While I don't know if the college activity center would let her in since she's not taking summer classes, maybe I could be like "I know my dad's gf's place has a pool that I'm allowed to use, but it's kind of boring to swim by myself, even if it's for exercise"? That would work as a subtle way of inviting her, right?

 

[ant_]

Hmm, think I might finally have an idea for our third date. We were talking about exercising and she mentioned that she likes to swim. While I don't know if the college activity center would let her in since she's not taking summer classes, maybe I could be like "I know my dad's gf's place has a pool that I'm allowed to use, but it's kind of boring to swim by myself, even if it's for exercise"? That would work as a subtle way of inviting her, right?

I think it's better to just invite her. Be clear with what you wanna do. 'hey, I'm gonna go swimming, do you wanna go with me?'

 

[Llyranor]

Hmm, think I might finally have an idea for our third date. We were talking about exercising and she mentioned that she likes to swim. While I don't know if the college activity center would let her in since she's not taking summer classes, maybe I could be like "I know my dad's gf's place has a pool that I'm allowed to use, but it's kind of boring to swim by myself, even if it's for exercise"? That would work as a subtle way of inviting her, right?

Stop trying to be subtle. Show interest and confidence, you have to own it.

 

[Zonic]

I think it's better to just invite her. Be clear with what you wanna do. 'hey, I'm gonna go swimming, do you wanna go with me?'

Stop trying to be subtle. Show interest and confidence, you have to own it.

Got it. I mentioned before I'm not one that's good with subtlety (well maily catching it), so feel a bit better knowing I don't have to take that route, especially now that it feels like we're more used to each other by now.

She said she has work this week (she tends to be more busy than me), so I suggested this weekend or next week.

I have to say, I'm really glad now I finally gave in & got a smart phone a few weeks ago. Being able to just text each other and seeing how she's starting to "warm up" via her texting language makes me feel a bit more confident. I'm starting to think I might got this and maybe I'll finally be able to have a relationship.

....Also I kind of can't wait to comment how good she looks in whatever swimsuit she wears.