100% agree with this, but there's the unfortunate truth that theres not much some of us can do to change the situation.
Where my incels at?
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100% agree with this, but there's the unfortunate truth that theres not much some of us can do to change the situation.
nush
Member
Single doesn't mean they are celibate.
Correct. But if a woman is just casually having sex, she's not going to prioritize the qualities that make a good husband. She's not looking for that.
Those women sleep around with the more attractive guys.
Someone like me absolutely has no chance at unattached sex. guys like me need women who want an actual husband who are willing to compromise on some of the more shallow areas, but those women are becoming more scarce.
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nush
Member
FullMetalx117
Member
You sound like a very smart person and likely a wealthy/successful one too. I'm kind of shocked honestly...I feel like you're not on the right apps or may have messed up the app algos (don't always swipe right!)? I feel like you need a confidence boost and just some experience - I don't want to sound shallow but hire an escort. Get your confidence boost/fulfillment and then there's a decent chance everything else will fall in place. Also want to emphasize pareto principle works both ways - 80% of men want the top 20% women. A LOT of women out there feel the same as you, are you willing to get with one of them?
bitbydeath
Member
Remember the man who touched a thousand boobs?
He didn't give up and neither should you!
He didn't give up and neither should you!
Krappadizzle
Member
The first step for sure is acknowledging your perceived flaws and trying to address them. Though, the things you can't change, there's nothing you can do. But the things you can change can play such a bigger factor that worrying about your height or face shape can be just a drop in the bucket.
I can almost guarantee that if you are in decent shape, you will have put yourself above a good majority of people in just overall general attractiveness. I mean.. what are we talking about with your looks? Do you think you are an ugly guy?
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Reizo Ryuu
Member
thank you, I'm not wealthy by any means but have had some good jobs, got a nice house etc. it doesnt matter. The problem is I'm short and ugly dude lol. Kind of tired of getting gaslit about it when its pretty obvious.
Escorts arent legal where I live and I'm not doing anything sketchy to find one. I just jack off a million times a week.
The pareto principle doesnt go both ways. Most men will take whateevr they can get. Very few men even have any options to begin with.
John Marston
GAF's very own treasure goblin
I've been out of the game since 2016 so I guess I'm sorta asexual?
I have no sexual interest in women since about 2018. Maybe it's related to the surgery I had that year or a drop of testosterone I don't care really.
Now when I see a cute girl walking a dog I go "Ahh what a cute puppy!!"
I've had a great run from 15 years old to 46 and that's ok. I've done shit that should be classified.
Anyway I'm too settled in my own solo ways now to commit to anyone else, even casually.
But I do feel for you young guys out there trying to make connections without results.
Best advice I can give is be yourself, cut out the bullshit and social media.
Meet in person, look at each other in the eyes for a start.
I have no sexual interest in women since about 2018. Maybe it's related to the surgery I had that year or a drop of testosterone I don't care really.
Now when I see a cute girl walking a dog I go "Ahh what a cute puppy!!"
I've had a great run from 15 years old to 46 and that's ok. I've done shit that should be classified.
Anyway I'm too settled in my own solo ways now to commit to anyone else, even casually.
But I do feel for you young guys out there trying to make connections without results.
Best advice I can give is be yourself, cut out the bullshit and social media.
Meet in person, look at each other in the eyes for a start.
Krappadizzle
Member
I can never just read my book in peace without girls hitting on me all the time.Maybe you are just so beautiful, OP, that women feel intimidated to ask you out.
Beautiful people have that problem, you know?
No clue as to why they won't just let me read in peace.
Dude I'm in excellent shape, I've been playing sports and working out my entire life.
I think I'm overall 'meh' in the face but many people would say I'm outright ugly. Not hideous, but just...... on the scale below a 5 for sure.
And I'm super short. its really not a mystery why I cant find anyone.
this right here is true though. Top men fuck so many women that those women raise their standards beyond what average guys can offer.
Trunx81
Member
Dr. Dick Jacob knew his shit, man. My copy looks as used as yours.I can never just read my book in peace without girls hitting on me all the time.
No clue as to why they won't just let me read in peace.
John Marston
GAF's very own treasure goblin
My anthropology teacher when I was 17 told me he went to a feminist Expo and asked every woman he came across if they would sleep with him.
HIs name was Guillermo and he looked like Danny DeVito with mad scientist hair.
He got slapped, laughed at and spit on.
But then eventually (he said after about 2 hours) a woman said yes
Moral of the story: Persevere & everything will be fine.
Also: Don't do like Guillermo.
HIs name was Guillermo and he looked like Danny DeVito with mad scientist hair.
He got slapped, laughed at and spit on.
But then eventually (he said after about 2 hours) a woman said yes
Moral of the story: Persevere & everything will be fine.
Also: Don't do like Guillermo.
Trunx81
Member
Then he became a famous filmmaker and kept his nickname of that day: Del ToroMy anthropology teacher when I was 17 told me he went to a feminist Expo and asked every woman he came across if they would sleep with him.
HIs name was Guillermo and he looked like Danny DeVito with mad scientist hair.
He got slapped, laughed at and spit on.
But then eventually (he said after about 2 hours) a woman said yes
Moral of the story: Persevere & everything will be fine.
Also: Don't do like Guillermo.
Days like these...
Have a Blessed Day
I'm a virgin but my friend told me dressing well and confidence will bag you some poon. I might try it
nush
Member
Corrected.
Krappadizzle
Member
I feel for any young adult between the age of 18-30 right now. The world is getting pretty harsh and I can't imagine how tough it'd be to try and navigate the dating waters while still trying to survive just inflation these days.
But the up side, if you stay focused and persevere, you'll usually rise to the top of your contemporaries.
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JimmyRustler
Member
Crazy… How do they even get it up?
No wonder more and more women get insufferable. Men will let them just do about anything as long as they spread their legs.
Am I the only guy out there who doesn't get turn on by the prospect of sex itself, no matter whom it is with?
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Most men will fuck anything if they're horny enough. I would fuck basically any woman that isnt fat or too old( and too young you pervs).
JimmyRustler
Member
In any situation?
StueyDuck
Member
is being an incel really a thing, i've always seen it as 4chan troll jokes/meme that people never understood, you know like they got the CNN anchor to say incel so that's the joke.
like those videos that just turn to distortion and thats meant to be funny for some reason? these are things i've never understood and just assumed was 4chan humor.
like those videos that just turn to distortion and thats meant to be funny for some reason? these are things i've never understood and just assumed was 4chan humor.
Cant say everyone is the same, but most men will fuck a woman if given the chance lol yes, unless they really find her very unattractive
Nydius
Member
If we're using the term correctly and not in the meme derogatory way, does living in a medically dead bedroom qualify as being an incel?
Maybe TMI but don't care: Haven't had sex in years thanks to my wife's RA and nerve damage and the medications she needs for both (two of which have loss of libido as top level 'common' side-effects), and then the complete hysterectomy she needed in 2019 after her OB/GYN discovered uterine cancer.
The drugs and nerve damage destroyed her sex drive and then she went from pre-menopause to post-menopause literally overnight after surgery. I still love her and take my vows seriously but not gonna lie... the lack of sex (and intimacy in general) sucks.
Edit: If we're using the term in the "screw dating and modern feminist women", all I'm going to say is I've told my wife repeatedly that if anything happens to her I'm not going to bother dating again. It was a pain in the ass dating when her and I met and that was before the advent of social media, the expectation of instant gratification, and the inflated expectations of women in general. I'm not at all interested in trying to go through the dating ringer in middle age or later. I'd just as soon rather take the life insurance money, buy a decent class C RV and a RealDoll and become a nomad.
Maybe TMI but don't care: Haven't had sex in years thanks to my wife's RA and nerve damage and the medications she needs for both (two of which have loss of libido as top level 'common' side-effects), and then the complete hysterectomy she needed in 2019 after her OB/GYN discovered uterine cancer.
The drugs and nerve damage destroyed her sex drive and then she went from pre-menopause to post-menopause literally overnight after surgery. I still love her and take my vows seriously but not gonna lie... the lack of sex (and intimacy in general) sucks.
Edit: If we're using the term in the "screw dating and modern feminist women", all I'm going to say is I've told my wife repeatedly that if anything happens to her I'm not going to bother dating again. It was a pain in the ass dating when her and I met and that was before the advent of social media, the expectation of instant gratification, and the inflated expectations of women in general. I'm not at all interested in trying to go through the dating ringer in middle age or later. I'd just as soon rather take the life insurance money, buy a decent class C RV and a RealDoll and become a nomad.
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LordOfChaos
Member
I have the sex sometimes so not exactly, I think my hit rate is going up with time but my interest in grinding through 100 non matches to get one match on the apps (trust me I'm not doing something wrong, this is the actual average for average looking men as the perceived value as a woman is through the roof with so many guys after the most average and below ones), most turn into non-responsive one way conversations, maybe 1/10 of those becomes a date, maybe 1/5 of those goes somewhere beyond, is obviously through the floor.
So the numbers are sort of stacked against you. I only occasionally swipe now when I'm bored. If I could just legally, safely, and cleanly pay for sex a few times a week, would I bother? Hmmm...
I will say though, work on yourself without worrying about it for a while is really good advice, since working out solid for a few years and getting a little bit big, I swear I'm not lying to you I've been offered a threesome twice without doing anything
The apps are just against you as anything less than a top 5% appearance wise man, try seeing if your friends network has anyone interesting you can chat up is often a better way.
So the numbers are sort of stacked against you. I only occasionally swipe now when I'm bored. If I could just legally, safely, and cleanly pay for sex a few times a week, would I bother? Hmmm...
I will say though, work on yourself without worrying about it for a while is really good advice, since working out solid for a few years and getting a little bit big, I swear I'm not lying to you I've been offered a threesome twice without doing anything
The apps are just against you as anything less than a top 5% appearance wise man, try seeing if your friends network has anyone interesting you can chat up is often a better way.
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MastAndo
Member
Being an involuntary celibate? That's just a guy who can't get laid and has been around since the beginning of time. It just received a label and took on a life of its own as an internet subculture.
John Marston
GAF's very own treasure goblin
The last 4 years of my active sex life were shared with a befriended escort.
I had enough of long term girlfriends and knew I was done. It's ok, not everyone gets to settle down with a wife and 2 kids
I'm a bit ashamed it took some "research" but I knew it when I met her.
The perfect transactional no bullshit love relationship.
Like a girlfriend but without all the negative shit
But eventually feelings get involved. It's inevitable I think, we're human after all.
She would show up after work wanting sex & I didn't want to. I just wanted to cuddle and sleep.
She wouldn't sometimes accept my money saying "I was not in top form sorry".
We parted ways because well, she became a "girlfriend".
Oh THE IRONY
Still those were great times I will always cherish.
SuperBabyMethod
Member
I think the word "incel" is such a grossly misconstrued word that it's practically lost all meaning. It's become pretty much synonymous with even the slightest perception of masculinity from what was originally, to my knowledge, a word to describe a very small portion of men with extreme hatred towards women who become celibate because they think they are entitled to sex from attractive women.
While I don't have a girlfriend, I have dabbled here and there with online dating (which is mostly bullshit) and have recently hooked up with a woman a few months ago. Something that I've noticed and come to realize as a man and I think men in general have to realize is that all of you have something to offer. All of you are unique in terms of humor, intelligence, personality, finances, etc. When I've gone on dates from the apps I realized that many of these girls are boring as fuck and have no game. As messed up as this sounds, women will get men just by the virtue of existing. It's up to the man to take initiative - it's your job and mostly your fault that a woman doesn't want to sleep or date you.
I've gone on dates enough to realize and know what I bring to the table: I have a good job, make decent money, live responsibly, I'm chill and not uptight about a lot of things, and if a woman wants to have a child (which I certainly do want one day), I'm her guy: I know I'm good with kids (being an older brother and a teacher helps a lot). If a woman doesn't want to be part of the ride and thinks she can do better, that's her prerogative and she can fuck off; in some twisted way in the back of my mind I know I'm better. That by no means there aren't any guys that don't have personalities and are super boring, but I think between the 2 men HAVE to have it - women don't - and I think because of that, again, might be unpopular to say, in the dating game, men have more to offer.
While I don't have a girlfriend, I have dabbled here and there with online dating (which is mostly bullshit) and have recently hooked up with a woman a few months ago. Something that I've noticed and come to realize as a man and I think men in general have to realize is that all of you have something to offer. All of you are unique in terms of humor, intelligence, personality, finances, etc. When I've gone on dates from the apps I realized that many of these girls are boring as fuck and have no game. As messed up as this sounds, women will get men just by the virtue of existing. It's up to the man to take initiative - it's your job and mostly your fault that a woman doesn't want to sleep or date you.
I've gone on dates enough to realize and know what I bring to the table: I have a good job, make decent money, live responsibly, I'm chill and not uptight about a lot of things, and if a woman wants to have a child (which I certainly do want one day), I'm her guy: I know I'm good with kids (being an older brother and a teacher helps a lot). If a woman doesn't want to be part of the ride and thinks she can do better, that's her prerogative and she can fuck off; in some twisted way in the back of my mind I know I'm better. That by no means there aren't any guys that don't have personalities and are super boring, but I think between the 2 men HAVE to have it - women don't - and I think because of that, again, might be unpopular to say, in the dating game, men have more to offer.
Cena is a true bro here, nothing wrong with bigger girls (280 though!!! That must've been a work out) most of the best sex I've had has been with curvy and chunky babes, skinny chicks just don't have a satisfying slap when you're going at it.
Its a very real thing. A lot of factors are leading to more and more men struggling with dating.
Rentahamster
Rodent Whores
I know plenty of short guys who have a girlfriend.
I know plenty of ugly guys who have a girlfriend.
I know plenty of self-loathing, depressed, low-effort, defeatist attitude guys who don't have girlfriends and probably will never do unless they change their shitty attitude and take control of their own destiny.
Your pattern recognition is fucked up, yo.
Rentahamster
Rodent Whores
It's not impossible
MaestroMike
Gold Member
kevin durant just scored 27,000 points today 12th all-time no wife, no gf, no kids they just get in the way KD knows what's up
Krappadizzle
Member
Lol, the other day, my wife asked me how long I would wait to get married if she died. I told her, "If you die, I'll never get married again."....Awww, that's so sweet....."I can't do this shit a second time, I put way too much time and effort in this one to do it all over again."......You're an asshole.....
Zathalus
Member
If you are able bodied then the best advice I can give is to go to the gym and get ripped. Now I'm not talking about just getting fit, I mean ripped. Every day, take supplements, heavy meat diet, the works. Get swole.
One of my friends is basically the definition of butter face, but his body makes up for it. He was quite a short guy as well. Dude was swimming in pussy until he settled down and got married.
One of my friends is basically the definition of butter face, but his body makes up for it. He was quite a short guy as well. Dude was swimming in pussy until he settled down and got married.
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Kenpachii
Member
Bingo.
What does that matter to you? nothing.
It's a bunch of self hating losers, that are so narcisistic they blame the world for there own absolute zero effort failure of a life.
I have ugly friends, and short friends. that had no problems getting girlfriends and wives. The only difference between them and those incels is that they didn't sat in a corner, being drepressed, do absolute zero effort and blame the world world for it and searched the web towards groups of people that just confirm the shit they are spouting.
They where happy, where positive, and went out in life doing fun and interesting stuff which naturally attracts woman start asking them out and et a girlfriend as result.
Because at the end, postivity, confidence, and being honest is what trumps every other metric for a woman. Unlike some people that think having a 6 pack and being tall is the only factor for success.
Honestly all i get out of the OP is that he's trying to convince people his hardest that he's simple not worth it.
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FunkMiller
Banned
Every single dude who strikes out repeatedly and constantly with women should ask themselves a very simple question:
What's the only common denominator in every one of those failures?
What's the only common denominator in every one of those failures?
That I'm short and have an unattractive face
I know plenty of men who are struggling in dating just like me despite doing all the things are they told to do.
They tend to be, like me, shorter, not very good looking and not white.
I'm do tired of people like you denying this problem or using the just world fallacy when so much data has come out about it. The dating market has changed and gotten a lot more shallow as women have more choices or prefer to stay single
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I've been ripped for most of my life. Ive always been into sports and exercise, plus my genetics are such that i naturally have low body fat and start looking ripped easily.
That's the only good thing I got going physically. But its never made a difference in dating
You're using the just world fallacy to justify ignoring the realities of modern dating.
oh, you have ugly and short friends who had no problems getting women? Ok, I have ugly and short and even decent looking friends who cannot get the time of day no matter what they do. Not to mention myself.
Countless data points are coming out about record numbers of men unable to succeed in the dating world right now.
Number of 'lonely, single' men is on the rise, says psychologist
American psychologist Greg Matos wrote in a recent Psychology Today article that the current state of young and middle-aged men's love lives shows they need to 'address skills deficit'.
you're using the classic just world fallacy of 'the only peoople that struggle with dating are shitty people that dont deserve love!!!'. Nothing in life works this way, where everything is fair and everyone gets what they deserve. And thats especially true of modern dating.
I'm happy you happen to only know lucky people able to easily date, but that isnt the case for many men right now. Just because you arent familiar with an issue doesnt give you a right to dismiss it like it doesnt exist.
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Aggelos
Member
Same here. I'm a job failure, I'm 40 years old (born in 1983). I do a shitty job, just a dead-end job, no future, not making a lot of money, just a sorry-ass salary. I grew up in Greece and still live here.
I've tried hard to develop professionally and personally after my 30s, but it seemed virtually impossible. My past has caught up with me, since I was an underachiever and underperformer back in '90s. And when I turned 18, things didn't go any better for me, on the contrary they got worse (in the decade 2000-2010). Still an underachiever and underperformer, couldn't land myself a job, skin acne problems, nerdy look and nerdy glasses, thin and lanky, you name it.
My past never allowed/permitted me to advance in my life....
So ya, now I just gave up. The landscape has changed a lot. It's a totally different landscape now.
Sushi_Combo
Member
So thread recap : it's the Women who are the problem and not me.
If you're going to come in, at least read the thread.
I have said 100 times the problem is I'm very unattractive, as in I'm very short and have an unattractive face, and I'm also not white which is a big factor where I live.
The problem is I'm unattractive. Women also play a role in that they are more shallow than they've ever been, but I'm not sitting here blaming women for having standards. They can do whatever they want.
The frustration comes in when ignorant people like you come in and dont acknowledge the reality of the situation. its a form of gaslighting and I'm tired of seeing it.
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Sushi_Combo
Member
I did read through it.
You keep blaming others and putting yourself down in the process. That's not attractive to anybody.
FunkMiller
Banned
Everyone has already given you multiple examples of the fact short and ugly men get girlfriends.
I'm going to be blunt here:
Neither are your problem. It's your personality and attitude. They need to change. You're not getting anywhere with any women ever until you accept that and do something about it.
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