Well, on at least the first count... see above as to how punctuation marks can sometimes be appropriate on the outside of a quotation mark even in the US.
As far as parentheses, you can use this as a rule: punctuation marks should only ever end a parenthetical statement if it's an entire sentence (not like this). Full parenthetical sentences are rare. (You may find them in textbooks offering a caveat or alternate theory.)
Yeah, I think you and I are talking about the same thing on the parentheses front. As far as U.S. punctuation and grammar, I have absolutely no idea about any of it.