• Hey Guest. Check out your NeoGAF Wrapped 2025 results here!

Gay and Bisexual thread |OT2|Bears and Twinks and Otters. Oh My!

Status
Not open for further replies.
that guy looks like an older version of Dominic Monaghan (Charlie from LOST)

A guy from another forum (who is also a member here btw) told me the exact same thing haha!

For some reason I really dislike the half-smile thing. You know when one corner of the mouth is going up but not the other one (cf the last picture).

That guy is also not my type. He looks like my dad a little bit.

I admit, the half-smile thing seems a bit un-sincere or something. However, it kind of intrigues me. An dad-kind of men are exactly my type :)
 
But I'm from Venezuela :(
Venezuelan High Five!!!

j3uwqHrEUXjSf.jpg
 
so i met someone this morning from grindr, we've seen each other about before (live like 5mins away) so I went to his house to 'talk' (i actually thought it would be just talking, thinking we could be friends), then he started saying how he wants a boyfriend and stuff happened following that. Now he is saying he wants me as a boyfriend, wants me to come out (I'm not comfortable coming out right now, it's complicated) and other stuff. I guess it's all my fault, why couldn't I friend zoned him quickly enough or had the guts to say no. I'm about to tell him now it's not going to work out. All this in one day, christ. Why don't people take it slow anymore
 
so i met someone this morning from grindr, we've seen each other about before (live like 5mins away) so I went to his house to 'talk' (i actually thought it would be just talking, thinking we could be friends), then he started saying how he wants a boyfriend and stuff happened following that. Now he is saying he wants me as a boyfriend, wants me to come out (I'm not comfortable coming out right now, it's complicated) and other stuff. I guess it's all my fault, why couldn't I friend zoned him quickly enough or had the guts to say no. I'm about to tell him now it's not going to work out. All this in one day, christ. Why don't people take it slow anymore

Eh, this isn't much of surprise. Hate to say.

Many wanna jump into things, or out of things depending on how you look at it.

I know that feeling, Im a bit more apprehensive and want to get to know someone before getting into a commitment.

Side note: I am in USA for weekend vacation :) enjoying weather, relatives can be great. I told my older cousin i was gay and he was so thrilled and was telling me how proud he was of me. Great feeling. Hes really made me feel welcome.

One thing that takes me back though: how many racists there are around here. Its just such a foreign concept to me. BeesEight I noticed talking about it and ya its just bizarre. My uncle is rather racist, great guy but holy fuuuuck.
 
Hi new people why dont you join us in Gaygafskype? Just add me Dinoblue1 we need a few more americans in there anyways :O

How do we join? I think I entered once quite a while ago but was only in for a few seconds. I am also in the US to add to your team.

Why didn't I know this man existed? And he played in two gay bear themed movies!



I'm an instant Gerald McCullouch fan!
(Gay)GAF, what's your verdict on Gerald McCullouch, hot or not?

I vote yes!
 
Why didn't I know this man existed? And he played in two gay bear themed movies!



I'm an instant Gerald McCullouch fan!
(Gay)GAF, what's your verdict on Gerald McCullouch, hot or not?

I would vote yes, but I have this thing for gray hair.

The best is when is not fully gray but just the sideburns and a little here and there, makes me go crazy *blushes in shame*.

Other than that, they guy is fine, although he comes off as a little short.
 
Dammit, I am so confused right now.

Why did my friend just remove me from his Skype contacts? I wasn't bothering him. I fail to see how "Oh, I'm a bit annoyed that I was about to ask my boyfriend something but he went offline right before I sent it." is annoying.

Plus, I was gonna chat with him...
 
Dammit, I am so confused right now.

Why did my friend just remove me from his Skype contacts? I wasn't bothering him. I fail to see how "Oh, I'm a bit annoyed that I was about to ask my boyfriend something but he went offline right before I sent it." is annoying.

Plus, I was gonna chat with him...


Is he an irl friend or just online?
 
Why didn't I know this man existed? And he played in two gay bear themed movies!



I'm an instant Gerald McCullouch fan!
(Gay)GAF, what's your verdict on Gerald McCullouch, hot or not?

He's got something nice in his eyes and smile ;) But I think he was rather... stiff in Bear City (that's the movie you're talking about, right?), but that might be the role. I haven't seen him in anything else.
 
He is saying he's going to go round to one of my friends house and ask where I live (he knows what street but not the number) and I said I'll meet him (I really don't want to) after since I can't now. Now he thinks I have some other guy over at my place.

and now I've got two new voicemails (blocked his number).

quick edit: I said I'm in town so he wouldn't come round now he's saying who I'm with oh my god I'm kinda scared
 
He's got something nice in his eyes and smile ;) But I think he was rather... stiff in Bear City (that's the movie you're talking about, right?), but that might be the role. I haven't seen him in anything else.

Yeah I looked up some clips on YT and his acting really differs from movie to movie which makes it hard to say whether he is a good actor or not. But I agree, it; s the eyes and the smile that makes him attractive. He has that same playfull look in his eyes when he did the It Gets Better-video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jxbiaiMgW4s
 
_prowler, how old is he/why are you scared?
same age (19) and he is acting stalkerish. Asking who I'm with, if there is another guy, what I'm doing, why I'm not in, leaving voicemails (which I still haven't listened to), threatening to tell my friend if I don't talk to him.

I'm just going to tell him the truth that I do have a friend with benefits, hopefully he won't go crazy.
 
I'm such a mess right now, I wish I could go back to "normal". For the last couple of weeks I've been staying awake all night, then sleeping most of the day. I haven't been able to get any work done, missing all the deadlines I had for a project (I'm a freelance graphic designer, I still have about a month to finish everything but I should have so much stuff done by now).

Sometimes I wish I didn't open my mouth about my feelings and just kept this to myself. I know it'll be better but I hate having no control about anything in my life.
 
I leave this thread for like 6 months and now it's full of new people. :o

EDIT: What happened victor? ^
In short:
Broke up with my boyfriend of 5 years because I started having feelings for someone else a while ago. This guy has been in a relationship also ever since we met a couple of years ago. He sort of had a crush on me since then but he loves his boyfriend, doesn't want to hurt him and would never dump him for someone else. So we agreed to cut all communication (just a couple of days ago).

He says he still wants me in his life but I just can't handle it right now (even though I obviously want him in my life as well).

Here are a couple of longer posts about it if you'd like to read some more:
http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?p=39837540&highlight=#post39837540
http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?p=40161272&highlight=#post40161272
 
So awful. Bear City was so painful to watch.

I wouldn't call it painful, but it was... meh. It was like a bad romantic comedy, without neither comedy nor romance, and with really ridiculous drama (a guy doesn't want his horribly obese boyfriend to get operation because... he's an egoistic asshole that doesn't care about his boyfriend health and career?).
 
Greeting Gaf for the first time on this thread.
Hi Gaf!

I've only become comfortable with my sexuality (although I'm not really sure what it is) recently so i'm new to this kind of subject.

I've been wondering, are there cases where 'straight' guys (at least they believe they are) get to be gay in the end? If so, is this phase marked with rejection of himself?
I'll be giving some context when I get some patience to write a big post :p
(this is not my case. I actually embraced it pretty well)
 
same age (19) and he is acting stalkerish. Asking who I'm with, if there is another guy, what I'm doing, why I'm not in, leaving voicemails (which I still haven't listened to), threatening to tell my friend if I don't talk to him.

I'm just going to tell him the truth that I do have a friend with benefits, hopefully he won't go crazy.
You need to cut that cord. This guy is acting all crazy after you met on Grindr for a hookup once? You don't need to give him any more information about your life. But you do need to call him and tell him to get his shit together, this is not proper behavior or how a person should act. Tell him to stop calling you or harassing your friends or whatever else he's doing. Tell him to delete your number and forget about you.
 
Unless I mistake you, I doubt you'd be happy if they broke up over something like this. If anything, I'm willing to bet this would saddle you with a huge host of guilt about the situation.

My advice (take it or leave it), is simply that things are not going to work out with you and Guy based on the information you've given us. I hate to be blunt, but it's probably best if you try and move on to other venues. For both your health and the health of the relationships around you, I think you should try and let this one go. Yes, it's going to be painful, but all break-ups are whether they are the real kind (like you're going through with your ex) or the friend-altering kind (like how things are with Guy right now). Pushing the envelope here will only damage your relationship further.

As to your ex's tweets, unsubscribing is the best step here. Continue to let him know that you didn't cheat on him with Guy, and that anything else is false. Stay honest with this, 100% honest, because half-truths will only make things worse here in the long run.

Like I said, that's my advice. I hope you'll heed some of the info in there if not all of it, and I truly hope I'm able to help.
I know it's something I don't really want to happen, as much as the idea of him being "available" appeases me, it's just silly (and mean, I know).

He told me a few times that if something would ever happen between us it he wanted it to be "right" since the beginning, not causing any pain to other people. Sometimes I think I'm just very naive. He's 5-6 years older than me so I guess that's why he seems to be handling this better than I am.
 
Greeting Gaf for the first time on this thread.
Hi Gaf!

I've only become comfortable with my sexuality (although I'm not really sure what it is) recently so i'm new to this kind of subject.

I've been wondering, are there cases where 'straight' guys (at least they believe they are) get to be gay in the end? If so, is this phase marked with rejection of himself?
I'll be giving some context when I get some patience to write a big post :p
(this is not my case. I actually embraced it pretty well)

I believe this to happen very often... don't most gays go through this phase, some sort of denial of who and what you are because of the implications that it has on your life? I think it's kind of natural.
I come from a home where being gay was considered normal and where all my friends were really open minded and still I had a hard time coming out because I realized doing that has a huge impact on the rest of your life. I mean, your immediate surroundings and the people you know directly might accept you for who you are, but the realization that in the future you might encounter situations where this is not the case kind of holded me back coming out the moment I fully realized I was gay (and in the back of my head still thinking I was "kind of heterosexual". It took me years to do it and come out. And even after that you still have to work on fully embracing who you are.

Not sure if I'm over dramatic now, but this is how I experienced it.
 
Greeting Gaf for the first time on this thread.
Hi Gaf!

I've only become comfortable with my sexuality (although I'm not really sure what it is) recently so i'm new to this kind of subject.

I've been wondering, are there cases where 'straight' guys (at least they believe they are) get to be gay in the end? If so, is this phase marked with rejection of himself?
I'll be giving some context when I get some patience to write a big post :p
(this is not my case. I actually embraced it pretty well)

It can happen. I thought I was straight until I was almost 15, very nearly 16. I can't really say I ever felt attracted to girls, but I was both deeply in denial about the possibility (and even ignorant of) my sexual attraction to boys. This realization was marked with deep rejection of myself; I tried to commit suicide. I would not recommend this, though.

And I think that the standard direction you are socialized is to assume you will be straight, and that is why a lot of people have to have that sort of epiphany where they realize that they aren't feeling sexually attracted towards the opposite sex, but the same sex. I, at least, never had the experience of someone telling me what attraction is, of describing the visceral experience of going head over heels for someone, or what having a crush was. I didn't recognize my feelings for other boys in school as being attracted because I didn't really know what it felt like.

It is possible if you are feeling this way at your age that you either are bisexual and are just now coming to a point in your life where you recognize what feelings you have for boys for what they are, or you are gay and have simply been deeply in denial.
 
same age (19) and he is acting stalkerish. Asking who I'm with, if there is another guy, what I'm doing, why I'm not in, leaving voicemails (which I still haven't listened to), threatening to tell my friend if I don't talk to him.

I'm just going to tell him the truth that I do have a friend with benefits, hopefully he won't go crazy.

Tell him the truth, hope for the best, and try to reassure him in any way possible... so as to avoid potential nuclear fallout from this dude. Stalkers don't take silent treatment well. He jumped the gun in wanting to have a relationship the very first time you met, but some of these people you'll meet don't realize how crazy they really are.


Greeting Gaf for the first time on this thread.
Hi Gaf!

I've only become comfortable with my sexuality (although I'm not really sure what it is) recently so i'm new to this kind of subject.

I've been wondering, are there cases where 'straight' guys (at least they believe they are) get to be gay in the end? If so, is this phase marked with rejection of himself?
I'll be giving some context when I get some patience to write a big post :p
(this is not my case. I actually embraced it pretty well)


Yea that happens all the time. Are you asking cuz you hope someone you know is gay lol? The straight crush... oh boy.

I myself started having feelings for guys when I was like 14 and prior to that I had feelings for girls only (mind you, it never really 'felt' right). By the time I was 15 I liked both sexes but leaned more towards guys. And by age 16-17 I think I didn't like girls at all anymore. Liking girls was just a phase I suppose. Doesn't matter though, im happy where im at.
 
Ugh, that's what Bearcity is about? That doesn't sound well imo. I mean, I like bearish and beefy guys, but if I like a guy, I prefer them healthy...
 
Yeah that really stuck out to me too. Who cares about your partners health as long as they fit your beauty ideals?

I think the idea they were trying to convey was that the guy wanted the surgery in order to look more like the ideal of beauty and his boyfriend was telling him that he liked him just the way he was and that physically changing because he thought that that would appeal to him more was stupid.

That said the guy was obese and most likely had a few health issues that needed to be addressed.
 
same age (19) and he is acting stalkerish. Asking who I'm with, if there is another guy, what I'm doing, why I'm not in, leaving voicemails (which I still haven't listened to), threatening to tell my friend if I don't talk to him.

I'm just going to tell him the truth that I do have a friend with benefits, hopefully he won't go crazy.

You really shouldn't have to live at the mercy of him going crazy. Just tell the guy straight up that you aren't interested offering that when trying to obtain future boyfriends, he shouldn't come on quite so strong. If he still bothers you after that, call the cops.. tell them this person is harassing you.. you can maybe get a restraining order if you think this guy might actually be a danger to you.
 
Greeting Gaf for the first time on this thread.
Hi Gaf!

I've only become comfortable with my sexuality (although I'm not really sure what it is) recently so i'm new to this kind of subject.

I've been wondering, are there cases where 'straight' guys (at least they believe they are) get to be gay in the end? If so, is this phase marked with rejection of himself?
I'll be giving some context when I get some patience to write a big post :p
(this is not my case. I actually embraced it pretty well)

Uhm.. this is kind of jumbled but speaking for myself only.. I always had an interest in guys. Always, although you don't really understand at 12 if you're gay or not and I think its normal to experience sexual feelings toward males and females.. but everyone is different. I don't think it has anything to do with a "rejection" of yourself.
 
I think the idea they were trying to convey was that the guy wanted the surgery in order to look more like the ideal of beauty and his boyfriend was telling him that he liked him just the way he was and that physically changing because he thought that that would appeal to him more was stupid.

The guy was considering the operation because he had a hard time finding a job for a long time (well, people judge you by your look after all). Health issues were also mentioned at some point IIRC. So I still think his boyfriend was just a selfish asshole ("You want to change your look in order to improve your currently miserable life? But what about me?!").


Ugh, that's what Bearcity is about? That doesn't sound well imo. I mean, I like bearish and beefy guys, but if I like a guy, I prefer them healthy...

Nah, that's just one of the three main plotpoints. The other two are: a twink guy falls in love with the most popular "daddy" in the city (played by before mentioned Gerald McCullouch) and tries to do anything to get his attention; a gay couple thinks they need to introduce some variety into their sex life and are considering a triangle.

All the plotpoints lead to nowhere, though, since all of them literally solve themselves during the few final minutes of the movie (
Gerald suddenly realizes that he's also attracted to the twink; the couple, after one failed experiment with a third guy, decides that they are ok with their current sex life; the obese guy decides he won't get the operation and few minutes later he receives a message that he gets a job he applied to earlier in the movie
). All happy end.

As I said, the movie is rather meh. It's like a C-grade "romantic comedy", but without the charm and appeal of actual romantic comedy. But hey, at least there are few bears there ;)

Greeting Gaf for the first time on this thread.
Hi Gaf!

I've only become comfortable with my sexuality (although I'm not really sure what it is) recently so i'm new to this kind of subject.

I've been wondering, are there cases where 'straight' guys (at least they believe they are) get to be gay in the end? If so, is this phase marked with rejection of himself?
I'll be giving some context when I get some patience to write a big post :p
(this is not my case. I actually embraced it pretty well)

Hi there.
Well, we are all "straight" guys by default - that's what society expects from us and that's what we are taught after all. So I think it's normal to reach the denial and rejection phase at some point once you realize you're different.
 
Got back from a holiday in France, all chilled out, well, kind of.

Now it's time to make a doctors appointment and get a surgery planned. Hope it
pilonidal sinus, don't google picture it
heals this time. Already got surgery for it once, came back, getting more extensive surgery this time. I've been out of the closet for a couple of months now, nothing is holding me back to actually start dating except for this shit and it's driving me crazy. Sure I can go to a bar or a party, but what if I meet a guy I like and actually hit it of, what then, should I say, "Let's wait untill after my surgery and everything is healed before we go any further, okay?". It's making me really insecure cause I'm ashamed of it and it makes we want to just stay in. Sigh, it's just frustrating and it's getting me down pretty bad.

/end rant.

The weather has been pretty nice though.
 
Got back from a holiday in France, all chilled out, well, kind of.

Now it's time to make a doctors appointment and get a surgery planned. Hope it
pilonidal sinus, don't google picture it
heals this time. Already got surgery for it once, came back, getting more extensive surgery this time. I've been out of the closet for a couple of months now, nothing is holding me back to actually start dating except for this shit and it's driving me crazy. Sure I can go to a bar or a party, but what if I meet a guy I like and actually hit it of, what then, should I say, "Let's wait untill after my surgery and everything is healed before we go any further, okay?". It's making me really insecure cause I'm ashamed of it and it makes we want to just stay in. Sigh, it's just frustrating and it's getting me down pretty bad.

/end rant.

The weather has been pretty nice though.

i like how the images were not related to what i thought it was lol.
 
Now it's time to make a doctors appointment and get a surgery planned. Hope it
pilonidal sinus, don't google picture it
heals this time. Already got surgery for it once, came back, getting more extensive surgery this time. I've been out of the closet for a couple of months now, nothing is holding me back to actually start dating except for this shit and it's driving me crazy. Sure I can go to a bar or a party, but what if I meet a guy I like and actually hit it of, what then, should I say, "Let's wait untill after my surgery and everything is healed before we go any further, okay?". It's making me really insecure cause I'm ashamed of it and it makes we want to just stay in. Sigh, it's just frustrating and it's getting me down pretty bad.
That looks wildly painful. I hope the surgery goes well for you.
 
Got back from a holiday in France, all chilled out, well, kind of.

Now it's time to make a doctors appointment and get a surgery planned. Hope it
pilonidal sinus, don't google picture it
heals this time. Already got surgery for it once, came back, getting more extensive surgery this time. I've been out of the closet for a couple of months now, nothing is holding me back to actually start dating except for this shit and it's driving me crazy. Sure I can go to a bar or a party, but what if I meet a guy I like and actually hit it of, what then, should I say, "Let's wait untill after my surgery and everything is healed before we go any further, okay?". It's making me really insecure cause I'm ashamed of it and it makes we want to just stay in. Sigh, it's just frustrating and it's getting me down pretty bad.

/end rant.

The weather has been pretty nice though.

You can't simply say "don't google it" and expect people to actually listen to you...
Well, the images were quite unpleasant. >_>

Hope you get the surgery soon and it goes well. This looks really painful.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top Bottom