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[Omegasquash]

I appreciate all the advice GAF, really didn't know who to turn to on this one.

I am meeting with her at 5:30 and I agree that she needs to come clean with everything. I will update you guys with what happens.

Good luck man. Just remember, you're in control here. I don't mean to come off as a dick, but she's the one who kissed (or got kissed, however you want to look at it), and she's the one who's saying she'll always love another dude. Who she used to be in a serious relationship with. For over 4 times the length that you've been with each other.

All I'm saying is don't get your heart broken, know your limits, and don't be afraid to ask questions.

 

[LosDaddie]

So I was wondering if GAF could help me with a little problem I have created for myself. This Tuesday me and my girlfriend have been together for a month (yeah I know, not a long time but we've been very close before that for 3 years).

What did you consider this girl to you before she officially became your GF? I'm just curious.

Vent time, went out with the girl i'd been seeing recently and a friend she brought along. We had a pretty good time but we never really got close or physical although we did have a lot of eye-contact and lots of smiles going around..

Define "seeing this girl" here for us. What does that mean? What have you guys done together?

Seems odd to me that lady you're "seeing" would feel the need to bring along a friend during a date.

 

[SlipperySlope]

Regarding Lu, the pain and bleeding were recurring problems, even with lube. So she went to a Gyno today. This was the response: "I have a benign tissue growth in cervix. it causes bleeding. i'll have it surgically removed tmr. nothing too bad."

That's a relief. I wonder how long until she can have sex again.

 

[Sarye]

Regarding Lu, the pain and bleeding were recurring problems, even with lube. So she went to a Gyno today. This was the response: "I have a benign tissue growth in cervix. it causes bleeding. i'll have it surgically removed tmr. nothing too bad."

That's a relief. I wonder how long until she can have sex again.

what an odd concern of yours.. are you just in it for the sex?

 

[demonkaze]

What did you consider this girl to you before she officially became your GF? I'm just curious.

We were just friends, we had a small fling in the first year and been friends after that. We've both dated other people but now after a recent holiday we realised that we really like each other and have been together now for a month.

 

[NihonTiger90]

Meeting someone who lives in town for dinner in about 2 hours.

SO NERVOUS D: *breathes into paper bag*

 

[zethren]

Regarding Lu, the pain and bleeding were recurring problems, even with lube. So she went to a Gyno today. This was the response: "I have a benign tissue growth in cervix. it causes bleeding. i'll have it surgically removed tmr. nothing too bad."

That's a relief. I wonder how long until she can have sex again.

Don't you mean "That's a relief. I hope the surgery goes well, and she recovers quickly."?

Because that's what you should mean.

 

[Lone_Prodigy]

He shouldn't even be using her real name on here.

 

[SlipperySlope]

He shouldn't even be using her real name on here.

I'm just using her last name, which is very common. I won't be using her first name.

 

[SlipperySlope]

For what it's worth, this was my reply,
"Glad you'll be all better . See! I told you it was a period! I'm just messing with you

I'd like to see you tonight to wish you well for the surgery tomorrow. We'll avoid sex until you're all better."

 

[SquiddyCracker]

Regarding Lu, the pain and bleeding were recurring problems, even with lube. So she went to a Gyno today. This was the response: "I have a benign tissue growth in cervix. it causes bleeding. i'll have it surgically removed tmr. nothing too bad."

That's a relief. I wonder how long until she can have sex again.

Guessing it'll take 4-8 weeks or so.
You can still have oral sex though (that goes both way).

 

[subversus]

That's a relief. I wonder how long until she can have sex again.

you can fuck someone else while she recovers, right?

 

[HappyBivouac]

I'm just using her last name, which is very common. I won't be using her first name.

I've seen some scary internet detective/stalker kind of stuff man. always best to be as careful as possible.

Plus it just feels kinda weird.

 

[Minamu]

Why would anyone want to find this Lu person? What for?

 

[KlotePino]

Define "seeing this girl" here for us. What does that mean? What have you guys done together?

Seems odd to me that lady you're "seeing" would feel the need to bring along a friend during a date.

I didn't know what else to call it but she's someone I knew a while back and recently came in to contact with again. Things got heated pretty quickly and she slept over once after a couple of dates so it's not like I've never kissed her and I'm just imagining it all. I've kissed her since but she hasn't slept over, we've been on maybe 4-5 "dates" since then doing fun stuff but not really anything romantic and to be honest I don't even know how I would do that at this point. We reconnected beginning of April but it's all been pretty slowpaced.

Never, ever pan your future with the someone you haven't even dated.
That should never affect your living plans, especially when you're just hoping there'll be an occasional booty call.

This is probably sound advice since I do believe I'd always be hoping for that and it would stomp a little on my pride if she would bring dudes over. At the same time living with a woman seems like it might have it's perks too since they tend to be pretty clean and she'd hopefully have some girlfriends over . But yeah the sharing a room idea is in very early stages and I'll probably have to kill it off due to the reason you mentioned.

Are you 100% sure it was a date and not just friends hanging out? The quote about finding a room together sounds more like friends and not more-than-friends.

Don't keep wondering if you'll find yourself in a position to make something more happen - just make something more happen! If you're interested in her then go for it. It will make it very obvious if she's interested in you or not. If she is, great. If not, move on.

I keep wondering about this too but we started from a romantic standpoint so at this point I was willing to just force the situation like you said which I tried to do with my dumb drunk texts but they didn't do much. I'll probably have to do it in person and just make a move...not discuss it right? Like I said I'd rather mess things up than become a friend. I didn't mind her bringing along a friend and having a good time if I atleast kissed her or had her sleep over afterwards but it didn't happen and not knowing if she just wants me to make a move or if she just wants to be friends is annoying. She's definitely not initiating it so maybe I should heed those signs.

 

[-ImaginaryInsider]

Listen, it's not about what you "have to offer." That shit doesn't matter -- emotions don't care about stuff like that. I understand that people make mistakes, but this whole situation is a really bad sign.

Exactly. I've seen plenty of girls "trade down" from guys they were with just to because it was new and exciting (or old and comfortable), it's not a logical choice kind of thing...thinking/showing he's the better guy WILL blow up in his face.

He should cut her off ASAP, no good is going to come from this... if she still has the ex in orbit after all this time, she is not going to give him up now.

 

[NihonTiger90]

So, just got back from meeting the girl who lives here in town. All I can say is wow. Expectations were met and well exceeded.

We ended up going to a restaurant I hadn't been to, but she had, a Greek place downtown. Food was great and we seemed to it it off pretty well, talking a bit about games (she's more of an RPG fan who likes Oblivion and Morrowind, as well as the Civ series and Rollercoaster Tycoon) and history (she has a masters in anthropology).

After dinner, we walked to get some ice cream at a local shop and ended up ordering the same thing without talking at all about what flavors we liked there. Not gonna lie, that was pretty awesome ... and tasty.

She is fucking cute. Damn. Also, she's a fellow nerdy type, so we got along well and among other things, we had a pretty fun discussion about how the Queen's corgis are actually in control of Britain and secretly planning world domination (it's a long story how we got to that point).

The best news is we've already made tentative plans for next weekend, so I'm legitimately excited.

 

[Sanky Panky]

So I'm here to hand over my Dating-advice card...

Been dating the same girl for 10 months, and she's had several dedicated threads on gaf already. One was a thread on how to deal with someone who deals with problems through weed/alcohol, and a previous one about the following recurring situation.

She has been the only girl I've truly loved, and my soul mate. It's like I'm dating myself, but with an even better sense of humor. Best sex of my life, and nobody has shown me love like she has. She's the girl I would want to see the world with, and raise children with... etc etc you get the point.

With that said, seems like we are breaking up. We were planning to move in together in October, and move to another city in May when her lease ends. However, I have an opportunity at work in another city that may happen sooner, but she doesn't want to move just yet. Friday night we argued, and Saturday morning she had a bit of an accident but went to the ex's house instead of mine (since we had argued). Nothing happened then, but Sunday night the ex went to her house and professed that he still loved her and wanted her back. He kissed her, and she came crying to me. She swears that she loves me, does not want to be with him, but is confused. She told me that maybe she'll always love him, but is not in love with him. They dated for 4 years, and she says he is her best friend. I met her 4 months after they broke up.

I told her she needs to figure out what the hell it is she's missing, or what keeps her hung up on him. I want to give her time, but this happened back in January, I don't know what sign to look for to know that she's truly over the guy. I used to be practical when it came to women, but not this one.

***update***

Broke up with her. I'm numb, frustrated and angry. She wants to be with me, and I left it up to her to suggest it... but she never said it. She doesn't want to break communication with the ex. The guy is leaving to Italy, yet she said she doesn't know how she'll feel in 6 months when he is back. She was thinking of having sex with him, but felt guilty and said she loved me instead. They kissed again yesterday. She said she wants to be with me.

So there it goes GAF. Thanks for giving an idea of what I was looking to hear tonight, didn't get it. I don't see myself giving a shit about "love" for a while. Time for short cheap thrills again.

 

[Jackben]

***update***

Broke up with her. She was thinking of having sex with him, but felt guilty and said she loved me instead. They kissed again yesterday. She said she wants to be with me.

So there it goes GAF. Thanks for giving an idea of what I was looking to hear tonight, didn't get it. I don't see myself giving a shit about "love" for a while. Time for short cheap thrills again.

I'm sorry, man. You did the right thing but that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt like fucking hell.

You're a good man. You'll pull through.

 

[MVP]

So, just got back from meeting the girl who lives here in town. All I can say is wow. Expectations were met and well exceeded.

We ended up going to a restaurant I hadn't been to, but she had, a Greek place downtown. Food was great and we seemed to it it off pretty well, talking a bit about games (she's more of an RPG fan who likes Oblivion and Morrowind, as well as the Civ series and Rollercoaster Tycoon) and history (she has a masters in anthropology).

After dinner, we walked to get some ice cream at a local shop and ended up ordering the same thing without talking at all about what flavors we liked there. Not gonna lie, that was pretty awesome ... and tasty.

She is fucking cute. Damn. Also, she's a fellow nerdy type, so we got along well and among other things, we had a pretty fun discussion about how the Queen's corgis are actually in control of Britain and secretly planning world domination (it's a long story how we got to that point).

The best news is we've already made tentative plans for next weekend, so I'm legitimately excited.

Good job, sounds like a fun date.

***update***

Broke up with her. I'm numb, frustrated and angry. She wants to be with me, and I left it up to her to suggest it... but she never said it. She doesn't want to break communication with the ex. The guy is leaving to Italy, yet she said she doesn't know how she'll feel in 6 months when he is back. She was thinking of having sex with him, but felt guilty and said she loved me instead. They kissed again yesterday. She said she wants to be with me.

So there it goes GAF. Thanks for giving an idea of what I was looking to hear tonight, didn't get it. I don't see myself giving a shit about "love" for a while. Time for short cheap thrills again.

Ugh...good job getting rid of that...*deep breath*...girl. Stay strong, because she WILL be back to play with your emotions when she's bored and her ex isn't around to keep her busy. Start banging other chicks ASAP.

 

[zethren]

***update***

Broke up with her. I'm numb, frustrated and angry. She wants to be with me, and I left it up to her to suggest it... but she never said it. She doesn't want to break communication with the ex. The guy is leaving to Italy, yet she said she doesn't know how she'll feel in 6 months when he is back. She was thinking of having sex with him, but felt guilty and said she loved me instead. They kissed again yesterday. She said she wants to be with me.

So there it goes GAF. Thanks for giving an idea of what I was looking to hear tonight, didn't get it. I don't see myself giving a shit about "love" for a while. Time for short cheap thrills again.

You are SO much better off now. Just keep telling yourself you did the right thing, man. Shit will hurt not being with her, trust me I know, but just surround yourself with your friends all the time and take the time to heal.

 

[SquiddyCracker]

***update***

Broke up with her. I'm numb, frustrated and angry. She wants to be with me, and I left it up to her to suggest it... but she never said it. She doesn't want to break communication with the ex. The guy is leaving to Italy, yet she said she doesn't know how she'll feel in 6 months when he is back. She was thinking of having sex with him, but felt guilty and said she loved me instead. They kissed again yesterday. She said she wants to be with me.

So there it goes GAF. Thanks for giving an idea of what I was looking to hear tonight, didn't get it. I don't see myself giving a shit about "love" for a while. Time for short cheap thrills again.

You did good breaking up with her, we have your back.

 

[Pastry]

***update***

Broke up with her. I'm numb, frustrated and angry. She wants to be with me, and I left it up to her to suggest it... but she never said it. She doesn't want to break communication with the ex. The guy is leaving to Italy, yet she said she doesn't know how she'll feel in 6 months when he is back. She was thinking of having sex with him, but felt guilty and said she loved me instead. They kissed again yesterday. She said she wants to be with me.

So there it goes GAF. Thanks for giving an idea of what I was looking to hear tonight, didn't get it. I don't see myself giving a shit about "love" for a while. Time for short cheap thrills again.

I just had a four year relationship end a week ago so I understand what you are going through. You sound like you did the right thing. Even if you get back together you will most likey develop trust issues with her, I speak from experience, which is just not fun to deal with. It's going to suck a lot but I'm sure you will be fine. Sorry for what happened.

 

[Neki]

***update***

Broke up with her. I'm numb, frustrated and angry. She wants to be with me, and I left it up to her to suggest it... but she never said it. She doesn't want to break communication with the ex. The guy is leaving to Italy, yet she said she doesn't know how she'll feel in 6 months when he is back. She was thinking of having sex with him, but felt guilty and said she loved me instead. They kissed again yesterday. She said she wants to be with me.

So there it goes GAF. Thanks for giving an idea of what I was looking to hear tonight, didn't get it. I don't see myself giving a shit about "love" for a while. Time for short cheap thrills again.

Them kissing again showed her true intentions, sorry to hear about it though. Hope you'll be okay.

 

[Log4Girlz]

***update***

Broke up with her. I'm numb, frustrated and angry. She wants to be with me, and I left it up to her to suggest it... but she never said it. She doesn't want to break communication with the ex. The guy is leaving to Italy, yet she said she doesn't know how she'll feel in 6 months when he is back. She was thinking of having sex with him, but felt guilty and said she loved me instead. They kissed again yesterday. She said she wants to be with me.

So there it goes GAF. Thanks for giving an idea of what I was looking to hear tonight, didn't get it. I don't see myself giving a shit about "love" for a while. Time for short cheap thrills again.

You did the right thing. If she kissed him again, it was only a matter of time that she fucked him if she hadn't already. Forget her. I'm a big advocate of cutting all contact.

 

[Sanky Panky]

Thanks guys, I'm glad we can always count on each other here for support. I would not have done the same without the advice here.

I also think it is the right thing. I know she will try to get back together, or that very soon she'll come back and say that she has made her decision and wants to be with me for sure (probably after they sleep together or he leaves for Italy). I'm not going to budge on this. Have myself and you guys to hold me accountable.

Maybe now it's the time to travel single to Brazil or Medellin, Colombia... gotta keep on keepin on.

 

[Log4Girlz]

Thanks guys, I'm glad we can always count on each other here for support. I would not have done the same without the advice here.

I also think it is the right thing. I know she will try to get back together, or that very soon she'll come back and say that she has made her decision and wants to be with me for sure (probably after they sleep together or he leaves for Italy). I'm not going to budge on this. Have myself and you guys to hold me accountable.

Maybe now it's the time to travel single to Brazil or Medellin, Colombia... gotta keep on keepin on.

Colombia and Brazil are swamped with hot babes.

 

[subversus]

.

Maybe now it's the time to travel single to Brazil or Medellin, Colombia... gotta keep on keepin on.

I wouldn't travel to Medellin single, lol

 

[-ImaginaryInsider]

I know she will try to get back together, or that very soon she'll come back and say that she has made her decision and wants to be with me for sure (probably after they sleep together or he leaves for Italy.

Expect her to try very hard to get back together, and months after you think its done, expect a call/text/email.

From experience, block her from fb, block her phone number, block her email ASAP.

 

[NeOak]

I wouldn't travel to Medellin single, lol

lol why not?

 

[Omegasquash]

***update***

Broke up with her. I'm numb, frustrated and angry. She wants to be with me, and I left it up to her to suggest it... but she never said it. She doesn't want to break communication with the ex. The guy is leaving to Italy, yet she said she doesn't know how she'll feel in 6 months when he is back. She was thinking of having sex with him, but felt guilty and said she loved me instead. They kissed again yesterday. She said she wants to be with me.

So there it goes GAF. Thanks for giving an idea of what I was looking to hear tonight, didn't get it. I don't see myself giving a shit about "love" for a while. Time for short cheap thrills again.

Man I'm sorry to hear that this girl was in a messed up place, and good on you for having the balls and self respect to stand up for yourself, your beliefs and what you want out of a relationship. Keep in mind that you'll be so much stronger and a better communicator because of it.

Fuck her for kissing him again. I've been through that and didn't have the nards to do what you did when I was in my early 20's.

I know she will try to get back together, or that very soon she'll come back and say that she has made her decision and wants to be with me for sure (probably after they sleep together or he leaves for Italy).

Just scrolled down and read this. You're absolutely right...she'll come back to you after she's had her fun with this other dude. Keep to it, and we'll be here to get your back. Now take a day off work and have a shot of something strong, then go do something you've wanted to do for awhile.

 

[subversus]

lol why not?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Medellín#Crime

 

[RedNalgene]

I keep wondering about this too but we started from a romantic standpoint so at this point I was willing to just force the situation like you said which I tried to do with my dumb drunk texts but they didn't do much. I'll probably have to do it in person and just make a move...not discuss it right? Like I said I'd rather mess things up than become a friend. I didn't mind her bringing along a friend and having a good time if I atleast kissed her or had her sleep over afterwards but it didn't happen and not knowing if she just wants me to make a move or if she just wants to be friends is annoying. She's definitely not initiating it so maybe I should heed those signs.

Either make a move or discuss it with her, whichever seems more comfortable given the situation. Either way you need to make your intentions clear. It's possible she now sees you as a friend even though you started off romantically - that does happen. And don't try to interpret her actions to come to a conclusion - a short conversation about her views on a potential relationship with you and you coming clean about what you want from your relationship with her (friend or girlfriend) will go a very long way.

I had a similar situation happen only in reverse. Met someone through a friend of a friend, we hit it off on initial introduction but after a few months of friendship with some hooking up, I realized I wasn't into her but she was very into me. Met up with her and let her know where I was coming from and what I was feeling, she did the same, and we're friends to this day.

And yes, definitely do it in person.

Expect her to try very hard to get back together, and months after you think its done, expect a call/text/email.

From experience, block her from fb, block her phone number, block her email ASAP.

This WILL happen. Since you guys now broke up, odds are that she will go back to the ex before he leaves and possibly do more than kiss. Then she'll try and get back with you while he is gone. She has feelings for him, and he has feelings for her. It's gonna be a long road for her, but she will eventually try to come back to you. You need to decline her advances when that happens. She is clearly confused right now, but at the end of the day has little respect for you if she's going to kiss him AGAIN after she broke down crying about the first instance. I mean, come on! She went back to him AGAIN (sorry, I can't emphasize this enough). She's not someone who has your feelings in mind.

Sorry man, you'll get through this

 

[NeOak]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Medellín#Crime

Wikipedia huh?

If it's on the internet, it must be true then.

 

[zethren]

Wikipedia huh?

If it's on the internet, it must be true then.

There's a 50% chance that it's true, and a 50% chance that it's false. So there is just as much of a chance that it is true than it is false.

Are you willing to take a 50% chance on your life, man? Are you?

 

[Bucket-o-roadkill]

Met up with an 11th girl this year last night for a drink, and as per usual, the day after communication drops and she's obviously not interested. I'm going to stop now for a bit because it's just getting me down. I get the feeling that my less than stellar looks are simply putting women off. Dating sites and the people I've met on them have literally destroyed what little drop of confidence I had.

 

[Chinner]

what an odd concern of yours.. are you just in it for the sex?

P sure I remember slipply slope getting stupidly depressed after breaking up with his last GF, and then insisting that he needed a new GF to get over his problems and cause he's a guy and hurr he has needs.

or maybe it was someone else. I think it was him though.

 

[Izick]

Met up with an 11th girl this year last night for a drink, and as per usual, the day after communication drops and she's obviously not interested. I'm going to stop now for a bit because it's just getting me down. I get the feeling that my less than stellar looks are simply putting women off. Dating sites and the people I've met on them have literally destroyed what little drop of confidence I had.

Exactly why I wouldn't do it. I don't want to see disappointment on their face when they see me for the first time in reality. Not saying that was the case for you on your dates, but that's what it would be for me.

 

[Bucket-o-roadkill]

Exactly why I wouldn't do it. I don't want to see disappointment on their face when they see me for the first time in reality. Not saying that was the case for you on your dates, but that's what it would be for me.

It's kind of weird because I put up recent pics of me, its not like I put up a load of pics from when I was 21 or something, so they should know what to expect. It's a double edged sword picking your best photos for these sites, because it shows you at your very best, which means there is only disappointment when they see you in real life.... But if you don't put up your best pics, what's the point? I have a hard enough time attracting anyone with my better photos lol

 

[Pastry]

First real night out as a single dude. I have been out with friends for the past week but it was just me and the guys so I'm pretty nervous about hanging with the ladies. Doesn't help that I have a broken hand and a brace for another month.

 

[lopaz]

I just got dragged home. Tearing too much ass

 

[NeOak]

There's a 50% chance that it's true, and a 50% chance that it's false. So there is just as much of a chance that it is true than it is false.

Are you willing to take a 50% chance on your life, man? Are you?

I've been there.

 

[UFRA]

***update***

Broke up with her. I'm numb, frustrated and angry. She wants to be with me, and I left it up to her to suggest it... but she never said it. She doesn't want to break communication with the ex. The guy is leaving to Italy, yet she said she doesn't know how she'll feel in 6 months when he is back. She was thinking of having sex with him, but felt guilty and said she loved me instead. They kissed again yesterday. She said she wants to be with me.

So there it goes GAF. Thanks for giving an idea of what I was looking to hear tonight, didn't get it. I don't see myself giving a shit about "love" for a while. Time for short cheap thrills again.

It's going to feel bad for a bit but you did the right thing man. She's obviously still into the ex, and in the long run it would ruin your relationship with her. It was inevitable.

You cannot be with someone who still has feelings or constant contact with an ex. Never forget that.

For what it's worth, this was my reply,
"Glad you'll be all better . See! I told you it was a period! I'm just messing with you

I'd like to see you tonight to wish you well for the surgery tomorrow. We'll avoid sex until you're all better."

That doesn't sound creepy at all...

 

[Sub_Level]

Is it a good policy to give a girl your number and tell her to text you whenever she's free to get together? Or should I have suggested we do something more specific on X day or Y day?

Either way, I'm pretty happy I asked her out. Hadn't gone that in months, needed to get my feet wet. According to another girl (classmate), she has/had a crush on me, so yay for confidence boost

 

[Tess3ract]

Well that was fun. the girl I had a bunch of drinks with and hung out with, we parked in the baseball field down the road from my house and were making out and getting each other off, and I guess one of the nearby houses got pissy and called the cops on us.

Some cop in a cop truck pulls up on my vacation road and was like, "can i see your id" (mine) and was asking if we were here both of our own accord.

WELP

dear diary, my neighbor thought I might be a rapist or something, please kill me now

 

[subversus]

Wikipedia huh?

If it's on the internet, it must be true then.

dude, I have read numerous reports on Medellin in traditional print press. But feel free to travel there!

 

[Ashhong]

Well that was fun. the girl I had a bunch of drinks with and hung out with, we parked in the baseball field down the road from my house and were making out and getting each other off, and I guess one of the nearby houses got pissy and called the cops on us.

Some cop in a cop truck pulls up on my vacation road and was like, "can i see your id" (mine) and was asking if we were here both of our own accord.

WELP

dear diary, my neighbor thought I might be a rapist or something, please kill me now

Question, is that legal to do? Fooling around in the car? My ex and I did that all the time because we didn't have anywhere to go and it was convenient.

 

[Izick]

It's kind of weird because I put up recent pics of me, its not like I put up a load of pics from when I was 21 or something, so they should know what to expect. It's a double edged sword picking your best photos for these sites, because it shows you at your very best, which means there is only disappointment when they see you in real life.... But if you don't put up your best pics, what's the point? I have a hard enough time attracting anyone with my better photos lol

Yeah, I don't like it. Feels like a used cars salesman type of deal. Fuck that, I don't need to see disappointment.

 

[Ashhong]

Should put your best on as the main profile pic, and then your decent/normal looking one in the additional ones. At least that way she will have an idea and you wont waste your time, while still luring in people with ur main.

 

[Tess3ract]

Question, is that legal to do? Fooling around in the car? My ex and I did that all the time because we didn't have anywhere to go and it was convenient.

It's legal to do so, we're both way over 21 but we don't have a place to fuck around (we weren't fucking).

He just obviously had to check up and see if we were both consensual because someone obviously reported us. He left us alone afterwards and obviously we were both too rustled to do anything more so she dropped me off at my place and went home.