People who don't say "you're welcome"

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blame space said:
you're welcome is antiquated. everyone's welcome.
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I perceive "You're welcome" to be a potential hazard if I'm addressing a vampire since they can then invade my home at will. Rather than risk being attacked by a Twilight glitterati, I say "Have a good one boss." because the response is impossible to parse as it's inherently meaningless and can't be mistaken for an invitation into my home.

I also avoid "my pleasure" because it makes me sound like a pervert.
 
I like to say "no worries". If I want to emphasise it, I'll say an effusive "no fucking worries!".

Sometimes to someone familiar I'll just say "eh" to indicate that it wasn't a big deal.
 
Septimius said:
Oh, great. A thread about the US "polite" culture. The thing I hate most about going to NYC is the fact that so many are polite, but in the most insincere manner ever.
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Not really true a lot of Americans are genuinely polite, however try telling a fast food worker to have a nice day before they say it to you and watch their mind grind to a halt as they struggle to respond.
 
I think "my pleasure" is a good one to roll out - it makes the other person feel like they've done me a favour by requesting something of me.

Such as:
"Thanks for doing that crappy job I wasn't prepared to do because I'm lazy with feelings of entitlements"
"My pleasure!"
 
I find that "You're Welcome" comes across as entitled and a bit pretentious. As in... they're confirming that you should be grateful for them gracing you with their presence. Most my exchanges usually end with "Thank You" or "No Problem" (which implies that you were happy to help, rather than they should be grateful...).
 
No one says "You're welcome" anymore. The new thing to say is "Good. Someday, and that day may never come, I'll call upon you to do a service for me."
 
poppabk said:
Not really true a lot of Americans are genuinely polite, however try telling a fast food worker to have a nice day before they say it to you and watch their mind grind to a halt as they struggle to respond.
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Yeah, I believe NYC probably is the worst offender in this. I haven't been anywhere else, in the US, though. I figure it's nothing like this once you get out of the big cities, though. I just can't stand the 'canned phrases'-politeness. When it seems that everyone in a service-profession is legally obligated to be polite that it won't be cordial.

"Hello-sir-how-are-you-today" in the most monotone voice ever, as their eyes scan the room they're in.

Misunderstand me right. I've meet fantastically open people, and been invited to an open blues night in The Village from random conversation in a guitar-store, so there are lot's of warm people in NYC. But there are some sad people out there, too.
 
Some transit drivers here just glare at me after I say Thank You when they hand me a transfer. At least when someone says 'no problem', or 'thanks' back, I appreciate the gesture.
 
I only say it in more formal situations, or when I'm talking to my Dad, who was always incredibly strict on those sorts of manners.

Though usually, I just respond with "No problem," or "It's nothing."
 
I usually say "no worries!"

"You're welcome" is sort of antiquated and formal, I dunno. I say it when people thank me for more serious things like big gifts or gestures or whatever.
 
blame space said:
that's pretty much what we're doing anyway, let's be real.
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Perhaps you're right. Better to say "Alright, just fuck off. I don't want to do this job and you're just being polite by social convention, but we both know it's a sham and we'd both much rather be doing something else than exchanging inane pleasantries."

A bit of a mouthful, but I could get behind it.
 
Septimius said:
Oh, great. A thread about the US "polite" culture. The thing I hate most about going to NYC is the fact that so many are polite, but in the most insincere manner ever.

I like Norway much better in that regard. People don't have canned responses. They say genuine things and not in every single case. It makes it more sincere.
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Thats a good point but at the same time as a Norwegian we are not the most polite bunch honestly to strangers.
 
"You're welcome" is what I usually save for formal relationships or acquaintances. When it becomes more casual or informal, I'll usually say "sure thing," "no problem," "it's nothing," "don't worry about it," etc.

One thing I notice not happening frequently is people not looking into each other's eyes during conversation. In a recent interview, I was surprised at how often my interviewers weren't making eye contact with me. I'm certain it wasn't a hygiene problem cause I'm on top of that shit.

Perhaps it's just my expectations are off. I've also been told that I have an intense gaze, and admittedly sometimes I attempt to remedy this by glancing away.
 
Owl said:
Because of the sentimental value, and as you said the old memories attached to them. Of course not everyone keeps things because of these reasons, but I'm sure most do.

I have a small shoe box full of things that are incredibly important to me and are related to very precious memories. If anything happened to them I'd be heartbroken.
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you're welcome

EDIT - dude no fair, you stealth edited it :p
 
poppabk said:
Not really true a lot of Americans are genuinely polite, however try telling a fast food worker to have a nice day before they say it to you and watch their mind grind to a halt as they struggle to respond.
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really? My answer to that was always "next!"
 
Pommy Dragon said:
Perhaps it's just my expectations are off. I've also been told that I have an intense gaze, and admittedly sometimes I attempt to remedy this by glancing away.
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How long do you stare into someone's eyes? I think two seconds out of every ten is long enough if they're strangers and you're not trying to seduce or intimidate them.
 
dejay said:
Isn't that impolite to say after they have in fact mentioned it?

"Thank you"
"Don't say thank you"
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No. People read way too much into "no problem" or "don't mention it."

To me it means: "No need to thank me as I wanted to do this for you." edit: or it really could stand in for the opposite. As in: "Thank you don't pay the bills, jerk." I guess it depends on the situation.

To be honest, I think "thank you" is really overused and that may be what is creating all the heartache over the fading away of "your're welcome." I have people thanking me for every little thing. I'm guilty of it, also.
 
dejay said:
How long do you stare into someone's eyes? I think two seconds out of every ten is long enough if they're strangers and you're not trying to seduce or intimidate them.
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It isn't something I keep track of, I just sort of do it as intuitively as I see fit. It probably has something to do being taught as a kid to look someone in the eyes when addressing them, but never really spent much time thinking about the degree to which it's appropriate now that I'm older.

Sometimes I'll just be "oh shit, maybe I've looking too long, time to continue the conversation but glance around the room or take a look at my resume again."

Your idea sounds like a decent enough rule to get me to stop being conscientious of it...
 
You guys are going to hate me but I have a nasty habit that I just can't seem to break where, instead of saying "you're welcome" or something to that effect, I thank the person for saying "Thank you" to me.

Them: "Thanks!"
Me: "Thank YOU!"

I'm always aware I do this and it bothers me because I'm super polite to the point of people asking me if I'm from England for some damn reason. God help me, I just can't help myself.
 
Horseticuffs said:
You guys are going to hate me but I have a nasty habit that I just can't seem to break where, instead of saying "you're welcome" or something to that effect, I thank the person for saying "Thank you" to me.

Them: "Thanks!"
Me: "Thank YOU!"

I'm always aware I do this and it bothers me because I'm super polite to the point of people asking me if I'm from England for some damn reason. God help me, I just can't help myself.
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"Happy birthday!"
"You too!"

"Enjoy the movie!"
"You too!"

I've done this before
 
Horseticuffs said:
You guys are going to hate me but I have a nasty habit that I just can't seem to break where, instead of saying "you're welcome" or something to that effect, I thank the person for saying "Thank you" to me.

Them: "Thanks!"
Me: "Thank YOU!"

I'm always aware I do this and it bothers me because I'm super polite to the point of people asking me if I'm from England for some damn reason. God help me, I just can't help myself.
Click to expand...

I have the same problem. I just find it weird to say 'you're welcome' most of the time but I will say 'thank you' all the time. I'm sure some psychologist could point to this being an expression of some problem or another and I'd love to hear it.
 
I always say "no problem," except sometimes I try to be cool and say "no prob," and then I immediately realize how lame that is and regret it.
 
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