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Gay and Bisexual thread |OT2|Bears and Twinks and Otters. Oh My!

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sphinx said:
thanks for the compliment, but I am 5'4... I am often the smallest guy online out of the 200 hundred in my city, to put some persepctive.... guys may think "o.k, do I want frodo for a sexpartner? don't think so"
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I like shorter guys. And I'm 6'4'' which is probably 'too tall' most of the time :p
 
sphinx said:
this is my search data:

Age: 34-42 (I am 35 and I sometimes like younger guys but that's rather an exception)
Bodytype: Normal, Small Belly, Atheltic, Muscular
Height: Tall (around 6'3 and above is a plus but not a must)
No smoker, No drugs.

anything else, (like role in bed, religion, cock size, ethnics, job) isn't relevant enough to even mention it..

am I too picky?
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It doesn't seem like you're picky, but the height requirement seems a bit crazy, considering that's not even an average (maybe only in the Nordic circle). I'm tall, myself, but I'm not even 6'3" . . . maybe an inch or two shorter.

If you're in a small town, you have to be open to more things; if you don't want to be forever alone.

Edit: 860 thousand inhabitants is a lot, but I guess you mean on that site?
 
hateradio said:
It doesn't seem like you're picky, but the height requirement seems a bit crazy, considering that's not even an average (maybe only in the Nordic circle). I'm tall, myself, but I'm not even 6'3" . . . maybe an inch or two shorter.

If you're in a small town, you have to be open to more things. Unless you want to be forever alone.
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Well he said not a must, but a plus. Maybe it's not really a requirement.
 
Scythe27 said:
I'd give her some time to process everything before approaching her about it again. I also had an unexpected reaction from my parents and it took years before they could talk about it.
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that's the thing, i am not approaching her, she is approaching me. i don't know what i'm supposed to say anymore, we have already spoken at length about it and it is what it is. there is no trick or reveal i can muster up to make it better

i'm just fucking upset to be honest. i know that it is a shock for her. i completely understand that. but i can't help but feel an underlying intolerance to bisexuality behind everything she has said so far.
 
Keep repeating yourself then. She'll get the message eventually. Sounds like she's just going through the initial shock and still in denial about what happened. Sorry it happened that way though but she's at least talking to you about it in some capacity.. that's a good thing.
 
Scythe27 said:
Keep repeating yourself then. She'll get the message eventually. Sounds like she's just going through the initial shock and still in denial about what happened. Sorry it happened that way though but she's at least talking to you about it in some capacity.. that's a good thing.
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yeah you're right, at least she's not ignoring it. thanks :)
 
Alcoori said:
I think you guys need to go offline.
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you are right but it's tough. I wished I had a big group of friends to get come connections to the gay world and stop needing the online sites but...

Ollie Pooch said:
I'm just shy of 5'7. Shortie here too :P
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*brofist :D

umop_3pisdn said:
I like shorter guys. And I'm 6'4'' which is probably 'too tall' most of the time :p
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Hi there! ;)
(now come and tell me you are either in Darwin, Australia, or Vladivostok, Russia, or so, hehehe)

_Isaac said:
Well he said not a must, but a plus. Maybe it's not really a requirement.
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this

JeFfRey said:
WTH? Even when I was studying in a 84k town, there was 3 gay bars! Heck, even my hometown of 12 000 has a gay bar!
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well, it's Bremen, Germany and it sucks big time and every single gay guy I've met, local or not, agrees this is like the worst place ever to be gay, There are 2 sad bars, no real gay disco, just once-a-month gay parties and the city isn't alive like Hamburg, Berlin, Cologne.

Damn, Berlin is a dream come true, EVERYONE is gay there, loads of men, of all types, and not being picky, you name it, muscular/tall, small/lean, everything is there.
 
I live in a big gay city so I have no excuse. Hooking up almost requires no effort, dating and finding something meaningful is the hard part. I'm surrounded by couples in open relationships and guys looking for one night stands only.
 
Scythe27 said:
I live in a big gay city so I have no excuse. Hooking up almost requires no effort, dating and finding something meaningful is the hard part. I'm surrounded by couples in open relationships and guys looking for one night stands only.
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Have you tried that out already?
 
Open relationships or one night stands?

I've done the latter (well still doing it) but the appeal is starting to wear off I guess. A real connection would be nice is all.
 
_Isaac said:
Why don't they ever turn into two night stands? Maybe three?
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Hm not sure, even when I feel the sexual chemistry is good an ongoing thing doesn't happen. My best friend ended up meeting his bf that way. They were FWB for a while, decided to date, and are now in an exclusive LTR.
 
Scythe27 said:
Hm not sure, even when I feel the sexual chemistry is good an ongoing thing doesn't happen. My best friend ended up meeting his bf that way. They were FWB for a while, decided to date, and are now in an exclusive LTR.
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Have you asked to try to see him again?
 
A few times, most of the time I don't get much of a response. I've had a couple offers but wasn't interested so it's not completely hopeless. I figure ideally I'm looking for a FWB with whom I'm sexually compatible. Is it that uncommon?
 
Hey, has anyone else played the demo to Coming Out On Top? I was made aware of its Kickstarter by Giant Bomb, of all places. It's a gay dating sim about a college guy who has just come out of the closet to his best friends.


There's a link to a work-in-progress demo on the Kickstarter page.


I'm really curious as to what other people think. I liked the demo a lot, maybe because I can really relate to the main character (I, too, have fairly recently come out to my best friend, and I'm a senior in college). It becomes pretty NSFW at certain spots, so beware!
 
Having moved down here (Orlando) permanently in October, it's nice to have been accepted by the town's bear community over time. I just wish we had a true jeans and pool tables bear bar, or an actual leatherman's bar. Chicago spoiled me. The bear scene there is extensive, and the choices of hangouts vast. Stonewall is sorta the guy's bar, pool tables, craft bears, sports on the weekend. I'm going to miss the more bear/leather bars like Cell Block, Jackhammer, or Touché.

Either way, it's good to finally have begun fitting in with the local community. I have tons of non-Bear friends, and love hanging out at the more mainstream boys bars too, but home is where the furr is. ;)
 
Just discovered I'm totally clueless when it comes to noticing other guys hitting on me.

I used to do my food shopping online, where the food comes from the supermarket in a van, and is then brought up to your apartment (or house) for you to unpack. It's a pretty cool service. Anyway, the delivery guy was always this uber fit young man. Good looking, toned, friendly etc. I've just found out through a friend that he's gay and was always trying to hit on me in the lift up to my flat. He even had a hard on a few times and didn't try to hide it.

Did I notice? No. I just thought he was a friendly guy.

Urgh. I could have had some serious fun if I'd know. I always wondered why he spent ages chatting at the door, reluctant to leave :/
 
trudderham said:
Just discovered I'm totally clueless when it comes to noticing other guys hitting on me.

I used to do my food shopping online, where the food comes from the supermarket in a van, and is then brought up to your apartment (or house) for you to unpack. It's a pretty cool service. Anyway, the delivery guy was always this uber fit young man. Good looking, toned, friendly etc. I've just found out through a friend that he's gay and was always trying to hit on me in the lift up to my flat. He even had a hard on a few times and didn't try to hide it.

Did I notice? No. I just thought he was a friendly guy.

Urgh. I could have had some serious fun if I'd know. I always wondered why he spent ages chatting at the door, reluctant to leave :/
Click to expand...

And you didn't notice? For shame.
 
pirata said:
I'm really curious as to what other people think. I liked the demo a lot, maybe because I can really relate to the main character (I, too, have fairly recently come out to my best friend, and I'm a senior in college). It becomes pretty NSFW at certain spots, so beware!
Click to expand...

This might be the first kickstarter I would consider contributing to. The demo was very convincing
specifically , the lecture dream sequence

trudderham said:
Just discovered I'm totally clueless when it comes to noticing other guys hitting on me.
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You aren't the only one on GAF
 
trudderham said:
Just discovered I'm totally clueless when it comes to noticing other guys hitting on me.

I used to do my food shopping online, where the food comes from the supermarket in a van, and is then brought up to your apartment (or house) for you to unpack. It's a pretty cool service. Anyway, the delivery guy was always this uber fit young man. Good looking, toned, friendly etc. I've just found out through a friend that he's gay and was always trying to hit on me in the lift up to my flat. He even had a hard on a few times and didn't try to hide it.

Did I notice? No. I just thought he was a friendly guy.

Urgh. I could have had some serious fun if I'd know. I always wondered why he spent ages chatting at the door, reluctant to leave :/
Click to expand...
You'll get used to it and more aware of it within time, especially if you place yourself in an environment where you more likely to run into other gays.

You look like a pretty attractive guy, so you probably get a ton of looks and oggles you don't even realize. Just be a little more aware of what's going on around you.

I used to be the same way, but now I almost can't turn off the awareness. Especially when I'm out at the bars, gets hard to focus on just one guy.
 
trudderham said:
Just discovered I'm totally clueless when it comes to noticing other guys hitting on me.

I used to do my food shopping online, where the food comes from the supermarket in a van, and is then brought up to your apartment (or house) for you to unpack. It's a pretty cool service. Anyway, the delivery guy was always this uber fit young man. Good looking, toned, friendly etc. I've just found out through a friend that he's gay and was always trying to hit on me in the lift up to my flat. He even had a hard on a few times and didn't try to hide it.

Did I notice? No. I just thought he was a friendly guy.

Urgh. I could have had some serious fun if I'd know. I always wondered why he spent ages chatting at the door, reluctant to leave :/
Click to expand...

Sounds kinda creepy to be honest.

Also, if he had a hard on that you couldn't notice...yeah, he's not worth getting upset over.
 
I just told the guy to fuck off... I just got fed up because he kept on making jokes about me and my ex's situation. He would randomly bring him up like: "would he be OK with this?" and that sort of stuff. I know part of it is my fault because I've been trying to keep everyone happy even though it's not possible but I don't really appreciate the mocking.

So I just told him to fuck off and come back when he gets over it.
 
trudderham said:
Just discovered I'm totally clueless when it comes to noticing other guys hitting on me.

I used to do my food shopping online, where the food comes from the supermarket in a van, and is then brought up to your apartment (or house) for you to unpack. It's a pretty cool service. Anyway, the delivery guy was always this uber fit young man. Good looking, toned, friendly etc. I've just found out through a friend that he's gay and was always trying to hit on me in the lift up to my flat. He even had a hard on a few times and didn't try to hide it.

Did I notice? No. I just thought he was a friendly guy.

Urgh. I could have had some serious fun if I'd know. I always wondered why he spent ages chatting at the door, reluctant to leave :/
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So am I. But, guys don't talk to me or hit on me. They give me the eyes, and I just don't notice.
 
Wilsongt said:
So am I. But, guys don't talk to me or hit on me. They give me the eyes, and I just don't notice.
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It's funny though, if its a girl I know instantly. Playing with their hair and batting their eye lashes etc. I just have to figure out what guys do when they into other guys :)
 
RatskyWatsky said:
Sounds kinda creepy to be honest.

Also, if he had a hard on that you couldn't notice...yeah, he's not worth getting upset over.
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I agree with this.

If I looked over and noticed the delivery guy literally had a raging boner for me I'd be a little creeped out. Being attracted to a guy is one thing, but having an almost disturbing lack of self-control is another. I'm assuming the delivery guy isn't a pubescent 12-year-old, of course.

I mean, can you just imagine: "You know all those times I was delivering your fruit? Well, let's just say I had an extra ripe banana that I wanted to drop off as well..."

dv;iusdb;lvksjbvuo
 
Achtius said:
This might be the first kickstarter I would consider contributing to. The demo was very convincing
specifically , the lecture dream sequence
Click to expand...

Yeah, that is probably the best part in the demo.


...Part of me wants to send an email to Giant Bomb daring them to do an 18+ quick look of the demo.
 
Scythe27 said:
My biggest frustration is that even if I click with a guy online and the conversation is good, more than half the time it just fades and doesn't actually go anywhere, even when numbers have been exchanged.
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This bums me out. When guys do this I can practically feel being at the bottom of the list of people they're talking to at the time.

Forcing conversation sucks, it'd be easier if people were more straight forward about whether or not they're interested in talking vs. phoning it in to be 'polite.'
 
trudderham said:
Just discovered I'm totally clueless when it comes to noticing other guys hitting on me.

I used to do my food shopping online, where the food comes from the supermarket in a van, and is then brought up to your apartment (or house) for you to unpack. It's a pretty cool service. Anyway, the delivery guy was always this uber fit young man. Good looking, toned, friendly etc. I've just found out through a friend that he's gay and was always trying to hit on me in the lift up to my flat. He even had a hard on a few times and didn't try to hide it.

Did I notice? No. I just thought he was a friendly guy.

Urgh. I could have had some serious fun if I'd know. I always wondered why he spent ages chatting at the door, reluctant to leave :/
Click to expand...

I'm terrible with this as well, or worse still, thinking someone is into me when they're not, leading to complete stasis in case i'm wrong...

also agree with royalan and ratskywatsky, sounds kinda strange if he was standing there erect and flaunting it enough that you noticed, i guess it would be cute if he tried to cover it up

also, hi everyone, second introduction to the thread, joined RPJ in june to try and make myself less of a lurker, hope it sticks this time
 
When you put networking on your online profiles how often do guys get asked how much you charged per hour? Ugh. . . I get my hopes up only to get solicited for sex.
 
Mr. F said:
Forcing conversation sucks, it'd be easier if people were more straight forward about whether or not they're interested in talking vs. phoning it in to be 'polite.'
Click to expand...


Sometimes it's not even a matter of them not being straight forward. Many people need 'hooks', something interesting to start conversations and get them going. Some people can do this with easy, but for others it's incredibly difficult. They're waiting for something funny or cute or interesting to drag them into the conversation -- even if they message you. Running through the minimal smalltalk will rarely get you anywhere.
 
DR2K said:
When you put networking on your online profiles how often do guys get asked how much you charged per hour? Ugh. . . I get my hopes up only to get solicited for sex.
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I've only had the happen once and I was almost flattered, lol. Maybe your profiles are very sexual?
 
SpaceBridge said:
Trigger! Did not expect you to look like that. RPJ is good at breaking preconceptions.
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It's Brandon Flowers, the lead singer of The Killers.

Edit: Beaten, so, uh. Everybody watch Enlightened tonight at 9:30!

Trigger said:
But I don't look like that. lol, one of these days I'll actually join in on RPJ.
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The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints has a really attractive website, other than the fact that the homepage's background images don't scale and leave bizarre negative space on higher resolutions.
 
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