Ok, so today something happened that really made me smile. I've spent a long time crafting myself socially into what I hope is a confident, fun, and not needy person. One of the things I've learned in pursuing relationships is that you should stick to what you want and ALWAYS make sure the girl respects you. Once she loses respect, its over.
I used to be very defensive when I was younger because one of my friends attempted to use me. I've posted about her before. Anyway, we liked each other but I forced myself to let go because I just knew she had a rotten personality. Which was painful because I was absolutely hooked onto her physical features. No other girl ever had me in such a trance. It was exceptionally difficult because I ruined my chance at another relationship which was perfect for me, just because I was a bit more attracted to this girl. I told myself I would let go because I wanted to make sure I could do it out of my very own free will. And I become much stronger and happier for it.
Around this same time I came upon the teachings of Brent Smith. I was always curious about the dynamic behind relationships so I started watching his free videos. He seemed genuine and had a smooth voice, I figured why not. Anyway, I just want to say that I absolutely believe in what he preaches. You want to attract women not by asking them out and pursuing, but by naturally showing them how interesting, fun, and charismatic you are.
Now, here comes the ugly part. You may have to play the game. I'll be honest, I hate playing mind-games with women. I'm a down-to-Earth guy who likes good jokes, people, and plays games in his spare time (and watches old cartoons when the nostalgia hits). I've always sought a kind and honest girl with a passion for something.
The reason I've played games with girls is because the materialistic, jealous, and scheming types always remind me of the one I really liked. And yes, I become slightly spiteful and try to show them that they can't stomp on all guys. Its a flaw of mine that took a while to change.
Anyway, all this rambling has a point. I think some of you who lack confidence and have been through shit need to change it up. You need to develop more of a backbone and cover your own needs before anyone else's! You need to stop being needy for female attention and start approaching them as regular people. Inspire them, show them a good time, and have fun with them. Be a bit flirty, be a bit mysterious. Don't go blurting your feelings out or complimenting all over the place.
Be cool about shit. Above all else, always make sure you are being respected! Stick firm to your principles and don't let ANYONE make you change them. I realized that preserving my own integrity is most important, hence why I'm very comfortable with letting go of girls who don't deserve my attention. And it also allows me to see the girls who are high quality and deserve someone kind and fun (the lovely ladies in this thread, for example, all seem absolutely awesome).
So, I basically urge all guys to go catch up on Brent Smith. Don't think of it as a dating lesson, think of it as just a general lesson on how to manage people. Now, you might be wondering where this sudden inspiration came from?
LINK
The password is "dating". Why did I refrain from replying to this girl? Because her personality sounded awful. She is most definitely down for a booty call. I acknowledge that she's "hot" but I'm sticking to my principles. I'm comfortable with letting go because I know that this is what makes me stronger. And I've attracted her just through that. I am different just because I didn't reply.
I'm not saying you want to play games with every girl you see. All I'm saying is don't be desperate and think that you
NEED a relationship or
NEED whatever.
It doesn't matter you're straight, bi or gay; looks and all that isn't as important as you think. I'm sure you're handsome and if some random hot guy doesn't agree, that's his problem and not yours. Know you're hot and assume they think so too and it'll go much smoother.
Being into games I've seen more than enough people trip over themselves because they're not seeing women as regular people. Heck, I sorta' did that with VN girl a while back; I was too smitten to be "normal". 
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I'm not entirely sure why, but I find homophobia incredibly offensive even though I'm straight myself. To be perfectly honest, I might be bi-curious to some extent. I don't find men sexually attractive and I have no interest in going home with a guy but dancing sexually with friends is no problem and I can appreciate a hot body even if it's a guy. If anything, I'd be jealous xD Some random drunk guy dropped his pants on the dance floor recently and while quite odd, it didn't bother me to see his dick per se. Stuff like that I have no problem with and I've had a devil's threeway before. Perhaps it's because I've been an outsider too, but I take homophobia personally. And even if I didn't, you're quite free to speak your mind and tell us your worries here