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GAF, I'm 100% sure I'm getting friendzoned on Monday

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Oh dear lord I had to take a few breaks from this thread while reading because I was just laughing so much.

OP, I'm sorry it didn't work out, but damn. I mean... There's crashing and burning but.. You know what? No, keep it up OP. You did your best and..

Oh god no I can't even think of anything positive to say, this just blows my mind. This brought a tear to my eye.

From all the laughter.
 
I really need to ask her for a file pertaining to an assignment, but I don'w want to initiate contact with her. What should I do?

Yes joke answers are welcome too.
 
Kopite said:
I really need to ask her for a file pertaining to an assignment, but I don'w want to initiate contact with her. What should I do?

Yes joke answers are welcome too.
Click to expand...

Just do it. Things can't get any worse.

No really, if you let this stop you from talking to her on a normal level it will just be even sadder. Letting yourself treat her as a friend/acquaintance/whatever is part of becoming emotionally strong, and moving on.
 
Kopite said:
I really need to ask her for a file pertaining to an assignment, but I don'w want to initiate contact with her. What should I do?

Yes joke answers are welcome too.
Click to expand...

No one else you can ask first?
Otherwise, just hit and run.
Ask for the file, chitchat about whatever, but NOT about anyone's feelings.
Let it die.
 
Kopite said:
I suppose I deserved all this huh, that really was cringeworthy and pathetic.

Spoke to the dude last night on Facebook and I asked him if we were cool, he said it's all good. I was a bit pissed at him for not asking me to back off or deciding to back off myself when he figured out that I was into her. Could have saved me a lot of time and embarrassment. He just apologised and I'm over that now.

Happy that this thread has made a lot of you all feel better, maybe when if things work out for me with another girl at least you'll no you can come back from rock bottom ;)

And fuck the haters here(not the ones taking the piss, but the ones who go way beyond).

Summary might come soon, not looking forward to doing it though.
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If it makes you feel any better I got Mandraked after making a thread about a possum. You seem like a cool guy. Just use this as a learning experience and if you guys stay friends then that's all the better for making your feelings felt. Don't let one GAF misstep rub you the wrong way. Well all take the piss out of each other every once and awhile.
 
Kopite said:
And just not respond after she sends me the files? That would be rude... she's still a friend.
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That's not being rude, you're just going to fuck it up and say some simp shit. Once you get what you asked for there's no point in saying anything else; she'll detect the thirst instantly.

Doing things your way hasn't worked out too well breh
 
MCXC Pioneer said:
That's not being rude, you're just going to fuck it up and say some simp shit. Once you get what you asked for there's no point in saying anything else; she'll detect the thirst instantly.

Doing things your way hasn't worked out too well breh
Click to expand...

I'll end it at thanks, I swear.
 
ComputerMKII said:
Hitting the gym won't do shit if you don't have the right personality. Don't work out to get a girlfriend. That's the fastest way to lose all motivation and quit. There are lots of married or otherwise not single dudes who aren't physically fit and lots of physically attractive guys who are awkward and forever alone.
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Work out to make yourself a better person. Work out for you, because it makes you feel good. Work on your personality for your own sake, so you can look at yourself in the mirror without feeling disgusted. Then you'll be ready for another person in your life.
 
MCXC Pioneer said:
He can't be trusted, I give great advice.
Click to expand...

Be nice now. The guy has just been humiliated by us in GAF and the woman he loves. No need to push it further. If anything have sympathy for the guy. And, seriously, Op don't be going jumping off a bridge or anything. Once you graduate college and incur crippling debt women and a broken heart will be the least of your problems.
 
ComputerMKII said:
Hitting the gym won't do shit if you don't have the right personality.
Click to expand...
This is so wrong. So, so wrong.

It's like saying losing weight won't do anything to help a fat dude look attractive. Being more aesthetically pleasing to the opposite sex can only improve your chances, simple as that.
 
ElectricBlue187 said:
Work out to make yourself a better person. Work out for you, because it makes you feel good. Work on your personality for your own sake, so you can look at yourself in the mirror without feeling disgusted. Then you'll be ready for another person in your life.
Click to expand...
This. It has to be about doing it for yourself first and foremost.
 
Kopite said:
Okay, convo was longer than expected/intended but no discernible fuck ups and I've got the file i needed.
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Damn it, I lost my internet for a few minutes before warning you not to take any sort of bait from her from now on.
Don't let her set the rules for anything while you stay friends.
And if it's going to hurt you to see her with her guy, then cut it off completely man, DON"T think you will be able to handle it maturely. It would be masochism.
If you can handle it good for you.
No half measures.
 
This thread is f'n hilarious. I'm so happy I'm not a bumbling teenager / early 20 year old that has trouble talking to women.
 
NinjaBoiX said:
This is so wrong. So, so wrong.

It's like saying losing weight won't do anything to help a fat dude look attractive. Being more aesthetically pleasing to the opposite sex can only improve your chances, simple as that.
Click to expand...
This is why you shouldn't have stopped reading in the middle of my sentence.

Kopite said:
Okay, convo was longer than expected/intended but no discernible fuck ups and I've got the file I needed.
Click to expand...

Let GAF be the judge.
 
gimmmick said:
This thread is f'n hilarious. I'm so happy I'm not a bumbling teenager / early 20 year old that has trouble talking to women.
Click to expand...

So true. Then again, compared to work and wife and kids now in my thirties, goddamn I must have had a lot of free time to be so self absorbed when I was in college.

OP, hang in there, plenty of people have been in your situation, I know I got knocked on my ass by it a couple times. I think the best thing for you to realize is that you just had a crush on this girl. This wasn't love, it was just infatuation, and infatuation goes away. Infatuation is just like the most basic building block of a relationship, something that brings people together for short periods of time when it's mutually felt, and gives them time to see if there's something more. Love is a completely different level that requires a lot more than hanging out with a girl after class. It requires building incredible amounts of trust and confidence in your partner, something that will only come with time.

Basically, you didn't get rejected by the girl of your dreams because the girl of your dreams is fictional. You got to know an actual girl for a bit, but then your infatuation and imagination rushed to fill in the rest and created the perfect girl in your mind. Unfortunately she was not infatuated with you, so you never had the chance to move beyond that initial stage. Maybe if you had gotten to know this girl in an actual relationship she would have been everything you imagined. But probably not.

Next time this happens with a new girl try to recognize that rush of infatuation for what it is. It's a good thing, but it doesn't mean you found your soul mate. It means you found a girl you should ask on a date.
 
Out of everything that went down in this thread, for some reason I totally lost it at NatGeo. Absolutely spectacular. Hope you're doing OK OP
 
@op: you really wanna start here: http://neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=504385

The thread itself is hard to keep up with but more insightful ppl there to offer advice. STRONGLY recommend reading through the first two posts by Minamu.

Furthermore, don't worry about this too much - most guys develop one sided crushes on women who may not be interested. It happens - we're men, and on top of that, we make mistakes that lead to these crushes because we're HUMAN.

Give yourself at least a week of space from this situation. No need to act cold to either of them - just be friendly but short on the messages; also go exercise to get rid of some of the frustration. During that time, occupy yourself with other things that have nothing to do with either of them as a hobby; includes talking to new women.
 
ComputerMKII said:
Let GAF be the judge.
Click to expand...
Fine. Just one part that I probably went overboard with.

Some background info, this girl, the other dude and 4 of our friends went to see a horror movie together. This were the tickets he was buying and I had declined to go to watch it.

Me:Jessica

Her:Hi :)

Me:Hey :D
Can i get the file now pls XD

Her:Oh yeah sure
But it isn't the complete one
Assignment.docx

Me: Kk thanks.
How was the movir?

Her: Horrid
I partially screamed in the cinema

Me: I heard J freaked out
U too? Haha

Her: I really detest horror movies

Me: I don't like them either, they usually bore me.
But I like some of them that aren't outright horror films.
For example I love the sixth sense.

Her: Never watched that before

Me: You should, it's a great film.

Her: OKay

Me: Bye then.

Her: Bye
 
Kopite said:
Fine. Just one part that I probably went overboard with.

Some background info, this girl, the other dude and 4 of our friends went to see a horror movie together. This were the tickets he was buying and I had declined to go to watch it.

Me:Jessica

Her:Hi :)

Me:Hey :D
Can i get the file now pls XD

Her:Oh yeah sure
But it isn't the complete one
Assignment.docx

Me: Kk thanks.
How was the movir?

Her: Horrid
I partially screamed in the cinema

Me: I heard J freaked out
U too? Haha

Her: I really detest horror movies

Me: I don't like them either, they usually bore me.
But I like some of them that aren't outright horror films.
For example I love the sixth sense.

Her: Never watched that before

Me: You should, it's a great film.

Her: OKay

Me: Bye then.

Her: Bye
Click to expand...

Just two thoughts:

  1. Why did you ask her opinion on the movie? She rejected you, you should no longer care about her. If she wants to talk about it then let her talk
  2. GAF may disagree with me, but maybe you should use less smileys so you'll look less like a Nice Guy. If anything, you should become more badass
 
Come on, the OP did good there. He was nice/"not an asshole" and concise. Keep it up. Always remember: keep your distance from now on.
 
I don't know man, I was definitely picking up some vibes there. I think she wants you and is just playing hard to get.

Edit: Bedlam is right, you played it pretty well.
 
JBourne said:
I don't know man, I was definitely picking up some vibes there. I think she wants you and is just playing hard to get.

Edit: Bedlam is right, you played it pretty well.
Click to expand...
Please don't put thoughts like this into my head.

If that's the game she's playing then I'd be fucked if I try to play it.

ComputerMKII said:
Just two thoughts:

  1. Why did you ask her opinion on the movie? She rejected you, you should no longer care about her. If she wants to talk about it then let her talk
  2. GAF may disagree with me, but maybe you should use less smileys so you'll look less like a Nice Guy. If anything, you should become more badass
Click to expand...
1) She's my closest friend in Uni, it was just me being courteous. And as stupid as it sounds, that Hi with the smiley kinda set me off.
2) Yeah maybe, I use them pretty often.
 
Kopite said:
Please don't put thoughts like this into my head.

If that's the game she's playing then I'd be fucked if I try to play it.
Click to expand...

Only kidding. You've been shot down. Nothing wrong with that. Happens to everyone. In a few hours/days/whatever you won't give a shit.
 
You did fine there.
But remember not to take any bait.
Keep it polite and short.
Don't get into any of that "feelings" nonsense again.

Start looking elsewhere and apply your lessons.
 
ComputerMKII said:
Just two thoughts:

  1. Why did you ask her opinion on the movie? She rejected you, you should no longer care about her. If she wants to talk about it then let her talk
  2. GAF may disagree with me, but maybe you should use less smileys so you'll look less like a Nice Guy. If anything, you should become more badass
Click to expand...

I think you are actually spot on. Haven't followed this thread too closely but this chat screams desperate nice guy. At this point the girl has you in the palm of her hand, get some pride and stay away. Two things can happen then, first and most probably, that's it for your chances with her, or there's a very slight chance she thinks you are a bit more interesting. Your current strategy has 0 chance of success at this point you are just a tool to boost her ego.
 
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