Alien Earth Open Spoiler Thread

What a load of bollocks this is. Steadily worse writing each episode. Waiting for the InGen helicopters to come flying over trying to catch the xeno in the wild ready for the crossover film Alien vs T.Rex
Just take it as it is, modern slop, I'm fine with it now, I got through the 5 stages of grief lol, now I find it hilarious and wonder how much idiotic can it be.

There's a 0,1% I can still like it, if the pet dog Xeno bites Wendy's head off in the last minute of the final ep.
 
I'm losing brain cells watching this modern day slop.

Will Ferrell Reaction GIF by MOODMAN
 
Oh wow, this was way more ridicules than I expected. I'm kind of shocked at how silly this became. The last two episodes have been unhinged.

None of the scientists have asked Wendy what she is saying to the alien, nor how she controls electronics through touching a screen. No one cares.
 
My family left me alone. And I didn't think critically about it. Well I did, but just let it all slide. I just want to get the EYEBALL talking.

Welp, team eyeball here too. :messenger_alien: I'm trying not to think too when watching this show. It is sort of a meditation of on how few thoughts my brain can still function on yet still gather information the eyes are presented. Hope the kid genius gets a third eye.
 
Welp, team eyeball here too. :messenger_alien: I'm trying not to think too when watching this show. It is sort of a meditation of on how few thoughts my brain can still function on yet still gather information the eyes are presented. Hope the kid genius gets a third eye.
He is giving it to the butler guy that is there with him. A dumb move because he has an ultimate loyal guy and he is going to lose him to talk to eyeball. My speculation of course.
 
What the fuck was that man... This has to be one of the biggest pile of shit i have ever seen, the acting, the effects, everything is so bad, i mean remember the effects for the creature in the very first film, this is just shite, a fucking guy in a suit and shite cgi for some scenes, can't believe what i was seeing, not even gonna tall about what happens in this episode, i'll watch the last one but they can fuck off if there is a second season... First they killed Star Wars and now this... Fuck sakes Disney 👎
 
Holy fuck, where do I even begin?

1) Alien gestation cycle is now shorter than the time it takes to boil a kettle

2) They're taking low-sperm scientist to the beach and saying "its just around the corner", but the beach is a dead-end with open water.

3) How did the synth boy get science dude back to his room? Is the vent from the lab is on the same system as the living quarters? No sense of quarantine, no worries about with airborne pathogens from xenos or escape routes? If it isn't then the fucking synth just carried him through the halls...while it appears to be getting constantly patrolled.

4) His fellow synth child refuses to help him due to his horror at what his friend has done. Then immediately changes his mind and says he will help, because....the plot says so, that's why.

5) The Alien is now 100% confirmed as a pet. Removing all the malice, power and threat from it. Any chance at creating tension is now utterly dead.

6) They're remaking Predator now as well. Only with characters you want to die and an alien that isn't scary.

Thank god this flaming turd will finally fizzle out next week. It has to cut off so that the original timeline remains somewhat intact so my prediction is that Godzilla arrives and destroys retard island with his nuclear breath. Eyeball survives by building a tiny raft and sailing into the sunset.

I was so very wrong about Noah Hawley. He's the heavyweight champion of hacks
 
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The one constant thing I enjoy each episode are the intros. They have the exact right vibe and mood I would have expected from an Alien show. Unfortunately the rest of the episodes never reach that level of quality.
 
I thought this franchise couldn't get more retarded after a flute playing android and that weird piece of shit at the end of Romulus but here we are.
 

Yeah, that's interesting to me. And the question of how much is he in control? What are the rules of his programming? Part of what I feel made [Ian Holm's Alien android character Ash] crazy at the end of that movie was that he had this countermanding programming — the crew's lives were expendable, but, somewhere in there, he had been programmed to protect human life.

From the various interviews, it seems Hawley has a superficial understanding of the IP. He says his favourite is Alien '79, but has his own understanding of it and various stuff in the movie.

It's clear the Xeno aren't interesting on their own for him. We need directors and writers who care about and believe in the Xeno itself.
 
Thank god this flaming turd will finally fizzle out next week. It has to cut off so that the original timeline remains somewhat intact so my prediction is that Godzilla arrives and destroys retard island with his nuclear breath. Eyeball survives by building a tiny raft and sailing into the sunset.

I was so very wrong about Noah Hawley. He's the heavyweight champion of hacks
I wonder how this show even got greenlit. Certainly much of the script must have already been written before the studio started production. How did they read about the story and not wonder "that's it?" I feel like he shoehorned in the Peter Pan references just to give it an air of depth.
 
The one constant thing I enjoy each episode are the intros. They have the exact right vibe and mood I would have expected from an Alien show. Unfortunately the rest of the episodes never reach that level of quality.
I don't think it's a coincidence that they're so striking--because they don't have dialogue.
 
5 minutes into this week's episode.

After discovering a body with an alien parasite on its face under his friend's bed:
"Will you help me?"
"No"
"Please"
"Ok"

The writers on their way to grab an Emmy next year:
ronaldo-win-ronaldo-award.gif
 
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The hybrids can rip off jaws and toss armored people 10 feet in the air, but they need help carrying a 170 pound man?

2 slim young women not breaking a sweat, one scrawny dude looking like he's gonna shit and puke. "We'll figure out which ones are synths later." Hmmm, let's take a guess......

And where did the chest buster in the cage come from? Did morrow somehow catch it in the jungle? Or was Kirsch just walking around with it?
 
As always there is that one bright light of incredible character in Kirsch and everything else is just dumb slop. Can we get this over and have Kirsch get his own spin off show?
 
I wonder how this show even got greenlit. Certainly much of the script must have already been written before the studio started production. How did they read about the story and not wonder "that's it?" I feel like he shoehorned in the Peter Pan references just to give it an air of depth.
I think the Alien franchise was shoehorned into an original story about the eyeball. Nobody would greenlight it so they mashed a familiar IP into it to get a pass from Disney. It would explain how terribly the Alien itself has been portrayed.
 
I think the Alien franchise was shoehorned into an original story about the eyeball. Nobody would greenlight it so they mashed a familiar IP into it to get a pass from Disney. It would explain how terribly the Alien itself has been portrayed.
Probably, but I really just want a show about the eyeball now.
 
Kirsch caught it.
He did, when?

All I remember was Morrow and the kids walking into a room and suddenly getting surrounded by Prodigy guards and then Kirsch had the chestburster in a box. When did he catch it?

It almost looked like he was gonna trade it to Morrow for the hybrids back (not sure why Morrow thought holding Slightly, who just BETRAYED Prodigy, hostage gave him any leverage but that's about par for the course for this show.

Is the redhead toast? They have NEVER explained the shock guns, what their intended use is, or why they know they work on xenos. I'm assuming they are some sort of anti-synth weapon because if they are primarily designed for stunning humans (like a taser) you'd think a hybrid would just shrug them off.

I'm also kinda surprised we have not seen any autonomous defense systems like the turret guns in Aliens. Seems like the preferred way for Kid K to 'defend' his sprawling, totally indefensible island. Would also be a great way for the hybrids to demonstrate their advanced capabilities, but........nope.

I kinda wonder how many zoos have their large predators in cages controlled by purely electronically controlled locks that default to 'open'. Seems like the kind of thing you'd want a nice beefy latch as a redundancy, or maybe even a 2 door entry chamber. OSHA is gonna have a FIELD DAY in the incident report about this lab :P

Speaking of zoos, it IS possible for highly professional environments to fuck up, like when that zookeeper went into the lion exhibit, thinking the lions had all been moved into their smaller feeding cages. THAT'S the sort of inspiration this show should have gone with; misdirection, subtle sabotage of secure systems, subverting the chain of command and exploiting complacency. But instead we get really hamfisted scenarios that just make EVERYONE seem incompetent.

I'm gonna rant about these hybrids for a moment as well. Other than Marcy/Wendy, we see virtually ZERO changes resulting from their advanced bodies. They mention the ability to download stuff once, but then they repeatedly seem to be clueless about simple things they should be able to learn in seconds, show little to no ability to process information and adapt faster than organics, and even seem ignorant about their bodies capabilities until moments of stress. They are mentally still children and how their intellect and emotional capacity would change with a new body is soooo under developed.

And did I miss why the brunette hybrid went crying to the psychologist? She seemed very in control when talking about her desire to stay on the island, why the breakdown and need for comfort?
 
I think the Alien franchise was shoehorned into an original story about the eyeball. Nobody would greenlight it so they mashed a familiar IP into it to get a pass from Disney. It would explain how terribly the Alien itself has been portrayed.
On the podcast this does not seem to be the case. Noah added new aliens because the xeno lifecycle was so well understood, it wouldn't shock the audience. His boredom with the xeno is evident, as they rarely if ever try to do anything interesting with it.
 
Reminds me of an old Kyle MacLachlan movie called "The Hidden"

Well worth watching, if you haven't seen it.
Seen it? I LOVE IT!!!!

One of my fav 80's sci-fi gems. And Claudia Christen (pre Babylon 5), YOWZA!

If they could commit to practical effects and really lean into the body horror, a remake would be fun.
 
On the podcast this does not seem to be the case. Noah added new aliens because the xeno lifecycle was so well understood, it wouldn't shock the audience. His boredom with the xeno is evident, as they rarely if ever try to do anything interesting with it.
Him responding with "I had a completely unrelated series I liked but couldn't get funding. So I shoehorned an Alien into it" would probably be too honest for a podcast that's a companion to the show.
 
I guarantee they spent x10 more time discussing Neverland analogies and how to encorporate it into the script than they did on the practical logistics of how an alien is supposed to escape confinement, what an appropriate response to a 200 pound razor tailed fanged menace SHOULD be, or how synth bodies might actually affect childhood minds and what would be fun things to explore with that situation.
 
It's humorous how people forget that the first two Alien movies are defined by how incredibly stupid the characters were.

Here we have a TV show literally displaying that these stupid characters are either children and/or or garden variety evil. And people still complain.

Oh well.
Those movies had other qualities beyond it's writing to make up for it. This doesn't have that.
 
So, what's the consensus? Better or worse than Alien Romulus?
Far worse as an entry into the Alien universe as it has almost NOTHING to contribute (other than they have a type of language and are eager to please(?)).

As a show, if you try, you can find interesting topics. But they don't explore anything very deeply, other than maybe the Peter Pan metaphor. But it is a good looking show, with enough violence and gore that it has a superficial visceral appeal. I strongly doubt the final ep is gonna tie everything up in such a way that it makes all the travel to get there worthwhile, but it might.
 
Far worse as an entry into the Alien universe as it has almost NOTHING to contribute (other than they have a type of language and are eager to please(?)).

As a show, if you try, you can find interesting topics. But they don't explore anything very deeply, other than maybe the Peter Pan metaphor. But it is a good looking show, with enough violence and gore that it has a superficial visceral appeal. I strongly doubt the final ep is gonna tie everything up in such a way that it makes all the travel to get there worthwhile, but it might.
So, more of the same and in a superficial way. Eventually I'll watch it since it's a good-looking sci-fi show and I like the Alien universe.
 
So, more of the same and in a superficial way. Eventually I'll watch it since it's a good-looking sci-fi show and I like the Alien universe.
They say it cost over 250 million, so 30+ million PER EPISODE. I think 1883 and 1923 (cowboy shows) clock in at those budgets as well, I remember being in awe when Game of Thrones was costing 10-12 mill per ep and how staggering that was, well now it's just gone bananas. At least with Alien:Earth you can SEE the budget, the set design is on fire (it should win a bunch of effects Emmys). But the script is really really lacking and thats very unfortunate. I'd much rather than THREE Alien:Romulus films than this show for the same $$$.
 
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