Support NeoGAF

[fennec fox]

Whenever I'm drunk, I play around with the notion of working as a bouncer part-time. This is due to two reasons -- one, people at parties often say I should be a bouncer (I'm 6'8 and built like a linebacker), and two, I think I could probably "take" all the alleged bouncers I've seen around Houston. so far.

But what do you actually need to become a bouncer? I haven't engaged in much actual fighting per-se since high school. Is it all connections? What sort of talents do you actually need?

 

[Cold-Steel]

Whenever I'm drunk, I play around with the notion of working as a bouncer part-time. This is due to two reasons -- one, people at parties often say I should be a bouncer (I'm 6'8 and built like a linebacker), and two, I think I could probably "take" all the alleged bouncers I've seen around Houston. so far.

But what do you actually need to become a bouncer? I haven't engaged in much actual fighting per-se since high school. Is it all connections? What sort of talents do you actually need?

Well, from what I've heard - most bouncers don't "fight" per se.

They enforce. It's a psychological thing, think preemptive security. You basically are there to do your job if things go wrong and if someone hits you - you are entitled to hit them back. But you can't hit them first.

You throw people out and tell people when they shouldn't be there.

 

[Sapiens]

Whenever I'm drunk, I play around with the notion of working as a bouncer part-time. This is due to two reasons -- one, people at parties often say I should be a bouncer (I'm 6'8 and built like a linebacker), and two, I think I could probably "take" all the alleged bouncers I've seen around Houston. so far.

But what do you actually need to become a bouncer? I haven't engaged in much actual fighting per-se since high school. Is it all connections? What sort of talents do you actually need?

Yup, connections. And you have to be a total and complete asshole. No compromise.

If you knock a guy out, you have to rip his gold chain off before he hits the ground.

 

[iapetus]

If your main skill as a bouncer is fighting, then you're not a very good bouncer.

 

[Lil' Dice]

Size means nothing if you don't assert yourself like an Alpha-Male.
I've seen bouncers that were tall lanky/short medium buid that knew how to impose their will on the patrons.

People will test your manhood, and if you're a 6'-8" softy, you won't last long.

 

[bionic77]

Watch Roadhouse.

I will sum it up for you though:

1. Pain don't hurt
2. No ever wins a fight

 

[whytemyke]

yeah, if you like getting sucker punched, its a good job. Sure, usually you'll have people having your back, as most bouncers prefer to work in groups and intimidate with numbers. but there's always a few assholes with beer bravery who just punch bouncers for no reason.

then again, a lot of bouncers go around thinking they're tough shit even outside of the club, and personally, i have no problem seeing bouncers get their asses stomped when they're not doing their job. I've personally had bouncers treat me like shit, and if I knew they didn't have 20 friends there to back them up I'd have throat-punched him on the spot. (We had me and two of my friends talking in a triangle, and the bouncer comes and walks right through the middle of us... he could have gone around us EASILY and walked right through us to piss us off.)

Yeah. Fuck bouncers. I dont mind the cool ones who just do their job... the roadhouse, patrick swayze type guys who are all about letting people live and have fun til they start ruining other peoples fun. But these fucking nightclub bouncers who run around like asshats whose shit dont stink really get on my nerves.

 

[bishoptl]

Jeeeeezus - tossing your weight around as a bouncer is the quickest way to catching a bullet there is. Successful doormen stay firm but respectful when talking with unruly patrons, and only use violence as a last resort. Threatening to kick the crap out of someone who won't behave only escalates the situation, let them bluff and blow and do the barstar thing while continually getting them outside. It's not the guys who put on a show for their friends that you have to worry about, it's the quiet ones.

Of course if some shithead takes a swing at you and you have an understanding with the cops on shift... *shrug*

 

[Lil' Dice]

Bishop is correct. Here in LA there have been plenty of bouncers killed by patrons they pushed around, who came back minutes later wielding firearms.

 

[miyuru]

It's hard to find good bouncers these days. You're fucking retarded if you think kicking ass is what being a bouncer is about. Bouncers require LOTS of patience, as you'll have to deal with drunk assholes night after night, and lots of them. You're not supposed to kick their ass or anything or the sort. In fact, it's your job to stop that kind of activity in the first place, as you don't want to give your establishment any bad PR in the first place. Essentially, that is your job - to keep the wankers under control and avoid any violence. One shooting or stabbing or whatever is enough to put a venue out of business.

 

[border]

Seems like it'd be a really shitty job....dealing with drunks until 3 in the morning, risking your physical well-being for a position that offers no health coverage. Why would you want to be a bouncer if you already have paying work?

 

[fennec fox]

Because my day job's boring! This is a drunk fantasy! Cut me some slack :lol

Anyway, don't get me wrong -- I wasn't expecting a bouncer's job to be nothing but fisticuffs every night, but I do believe I have the social aspect of it down, at least. All the bouncers I've seen mostly stood around and looked boss, and I know I can do that much.

 

[bishoptl]

Seems like it'd be a really shitty job....dealing with drunks until 3 in the morning, risking your physical well-being for a position that offers no health coverage. Why would you want to be a bouncer if you already have paying work?

1. Extra cash on the side from greasing
2. Pussy
3. Listening to good music (at my 2nd bar job, anyways) and getting paid for it
4. Camraderie with a good bunch of guys - I lucked out with my coworkers
5. A nice switch from dealing with computer software all week

 

[Cerebral Palsy]

My friend was a bouncer for a year or so. You have to be big, and uh... Big. I don't think they require a college degree.

 

[speedpop]

We had bouncers at the Irish Pub we worked at and they were great. The main things you have to go through are security firms, and it'd probably be best to try and learn some basic grappling moves.

Also you don't have to be huge to be a bouncer, as long as you got a few muscles and look like you can intimidate with a dash of arrogancy, then you'll be fine.

 

[Escape Goat]

wearing a ninja outfit often intimidates people and makes for good work attire.

 

[The Take Out Bandit]

YOU NEED ELEET FUCKIN' SKULL PIERCINGS!

If you're physically intimidating, go for it. I knew this fat fuck from grade school who was built like an economy sized sack of wet oatmeal that ended up getting a job as a BOUNCAR!

Go for broke!

It's not the guys who put on a show for their friends that you have to worry about, it's the quiet ones.

Shut up you!

 

[Slurpy]

You just have to look intimidating, and know how to carry yourself so that people dont want to fuck with you. A friend used to be a bouncer, he is a big guy, but he changes modes at the job. Not much skill involved, only experience.

 

[Blackace]

1. Extra cash on the side from greasing
2. Pussy
3. Listening to good music (at my 2nd bar job, anyways) and getting paid for it
4. Camraderie with a good bunch of guys - I lucked out with my coworkers
5. A nice switch from dealing with computer software all week

I am a bouncer at a hip-hop club in Yokohama... and all of Bish said is true.. all but computer software because I am an English teacher...

 

[MC Safety]

Fennec, stick to breaking hearts and not crushing skulls.

Your friend and former boss-type person,
Me

 

[acoustix]

The perks bish said are all true.

However a couple drawbacks according to a buddy of mine...

In most bars the bouncers are not allowed to fight the customers even if the customers take a swing at them. All their supposed to do is throw the people out, not fight them. Also putting up with drunkin assholes can really get to you (testing you for a fight etc.), making you more of an ass when your not at work. And you can get turned off from the bar scene completely kinda like not wanting to visit your work when your not working.

 

[boutrosinit]

Hey Kevin/Fennec.

I worked a door at a funk club in Camden for two months when I was 21. It was usually me and whichever giant was on the shift (usually dudes between 6 and 7 feet tall - I'm 6"2).

Basically, I was the 'charmer' who held the guess list and they had the ticker, also using their appearance as the obvious threat. It was an easy job, didn't pay too well - the UK equivalent of $20 an hour - but was GREAT for meeting women, though slightly superficial ones who were ALARMINGLY forthcoming - one who I talked to for barely 10 seconds came back on the way out and handed me her number on a strip of paper and I was also lucky enough to shag two different women in the same week (that was a big deal to me back then). I also got cocktails half price for me and my friends and could let in whoever I wanted within reason. It was actually very fucking cool.

However, I wouldn't go back. You have to work weekend evenings, stand out in the cold a lot and you soon learn that most people who hang out regularly in bars are losers without a real group of friends. You start wanting to move away from these people very very fast.

So my experience in summation:

+
= WOMEN VERY VERY EASY
= If your bar has employee perks, you can treat your friends to a night of cheap-ass drinking
= You'll meet some interesting characters amongst the loser onslaught
= You get treated like a kick among locals who frequent there, especially the ones you let off a door charge
= If it's a bar with a good tunesmith, you'll hear and learn about good music. My bar intro'd me to The Sugar Hill Gang, Grandmaster Flash, Earth, Wind and Fire and James Brown!

-
= You will meet lots of losers
= You may get attacked by a nutter (I never did, though did have to sedate one guy, which was easy as he was so drunk)
= You will have your patience tested repeatedly (can be a good thing too)
= The pay is pants
= You're tired over the weekend because you're up till X am standing out side a club and sleeping weird hours a few days in a row

 

[Blackace]

The perks bish said are all true.

However a couple drawbacks according to a buddy of mine...

In most bars the bouncers are not allowed to fight the customers even if the customers take a swing at them. All their supposed to do is throw the people out, not fight them. Also putting up with drunkin assholes can really get to you (testing you for a fight etc.), making you more of an ass when your not at work. And you can get turned off from the bar scene completely kinda like not wanting to visit your work when your not working.

I never go to clubs anymore... Well almost never anyways... And will most likely stay that way even when I retire from the bouncing gig

 

[Shawn]

why is it easy to get women if you're a bouncer?

 

[ToxicAdam]

Start off working nights in a pub, then work your way up to night clubs. Then angle for a higher end strip club.

Strip clubs are always looking for bouncers (with experience). Most of the customers there are pussies (unless its a bachelor party .. watch out then) and since drinks are so expensive you don't get too many drunks like you would in a nightclub. The greasing in a strip bar is pretty good.

 

[norinrad21]

Watch Roadhouse.

I will sum it up for you though:

1. Pain don't hurt
2. No ever wins a fight

Best scene in Roadhouse is where the guy helds Patrick up and says to him i used to F**k guys like you in jail.

Awesome :lol

 

[ToxicAdam]

why is it easy to get women if you're a bouncer?

1. You're sober, they are not.
2. You're in a 'uniform' (women are a sucker for authority figures)
3. Girls that go there all the time end up screwing the waiter/bartender/bouncer. Some just do it for free perks, others do it because they are sick of the losers that goto bars and the workers seem normal.