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[Viewt]

I understand your plight, OP. I'm also a bad dancer. I'm also a VERY reluctant dancer because of this. The only way to get me to dance is to get me drunk enough to stop being self-aware. Then I'll dance. I'll still be bad at it, but I just won't care. Basically, I just start moving really quickly, swaying erratically, and jumping off-beat. It's a hilarious, if embarrassing scene.

My girlfriend loves to dance, as well, and she gets a LOT of joy out of getting me to dance. We were at a wedding a couple months ago, and leading up to it, she kept joking that she was going to get me nice and boozed up so that she'd have a dance partner. Lo and behold, the open bar got the better of me, and we were out on the floor. At one point, they started playing The Humpty Dance and I got into it like it was my own personal theme song. I busted out moves I never would have attempted sober haha. It was TURRIBLE.

But here's the thing. Nobody really cares if you're a good dancer or not. Certainly nobody cares that I'm a bad dancer. Because it's way more annoying to be the guy who pretends he's too cool to dance than the guy who says fuck it and dances anyway. It's actually a really endearing quality to be social and energetic when you're doing something you're bad at. I've been trying to be better at this. Best of luck!

 

[gamz]

Im a terrible dancer BUT my Wife is an amazing dancer and makes me look like a know what I'm doing. We get compliments and just Crack up.

 

[PigSpeakers]

Before I met my wife, I couldn't dance but I pretended to. There came a day where I realized a lot of other people couldn't actually dance and it didn't matter if I knew either. I was out there, I was having fun. Which is the craziest thing because I have anxiety and get really uncomfortable in situations like that.

Thankfully, my wife doesn't like dancing either. Surprisingly, we met at a church dance that neither of us had planned to go to. And now we never have to dance again.

Just loosen up OP. No one cares if you're a great dancer. Your girlfriend clearly doesn't. But I'm sure she'd be happy if you took dance lessons with her.

 

[Mechanized]

The movie Hitch taught me how to dance. And love.

 

[Lego Boss]

Have you tried ecstasy?

Seriously, you'll be dancing like Rasputin after that.

 

[Gravy Boat]

It's only dancing.

 

[Angry Grimace]

I dance like a crazyman but one time this cute girl tried to get me to square dance and I probably broke all of her toes.

 

[BladeoftheImmortal]

This advice is very hard for me to follow, even though I respect and appreciate it in concept.

I'm not really in a position to just do what feels natural or to just enjoy myself since, as I've mentioned, nothing feels natural and I don't enjoy it. I really prefer to talk at parties. I go from group to group and tell stories, hear jokes, make sure everyone has a ride home, etc. That's my kind of party, that's my kind of presence, and that's what I usually do.

My girlfriend is like this as well, but also loves to dance. So the longer I drag out the social tango, the more anxious she gets to get out there. And when we are someplace together, it's not just about what I want to do. It's about both of us having a good time.

So, if you can understand, I don't enjoy dancing and would never do it on my own. So I can't just bust out there and go with the flow because that river is frozen solid. But I do want to dance with her. So I have to reconcile my own disgust with dancing with my intense interest to become a better and more comfortable dancer.

Do you know what I mean?

I got you, I used to be exactly the same. You only get over it by trying. I'm fat and not that great of a dancer, and before I wondered why I looked worse than others, too when out on the dance floor. BUt the more I went to a club, the more I'd just go out and try to do it. I still second guess myself when dancing, honestly. like should I be doing this move. it's dumb as hell. no one else really knows what they are doing. everyone is just flailing in the end.

 

[Stackboy]

I really love music, I've played in multiple bands, play drums so I have rhythm down pat, but dancing has always evaded me. I just move my feet with the beat and let my arms do what they want.

Find your favorite songs, make a playlist and just move around to them at home. Have a few drinks, forget about yourself and go with it.

Or, listen to ska.

 

[Switch Back 9]

I'm not a good dancer, and was once openly mocked by the DJ at a bar in Marseilles.

HOWEVER, after a few drinks I still love to boogie; why the fuck not?

My GF on the other hand, hates it. She actually cried at my cousin's wedding because I was pressuring her to dance with me. Some people just don't like it *shrug*

 

[SRG01]

Every major city has drop-in beginner Salsa or Swing lessons. Try going to those regularly and you'll develop a rhythm in no time

 

[PtM]

You are handicapping yourself by refusing to practice at home, in private.

If you didn't code on a daily basis, would you enter a game jam? It's the same thing.

This. I myself have a good grasp of rhythm, because I used to spaz out as a kid to the radio.

Find songs you really enjoy, and enjoy not for their lyrics, but for their beat, rhythm and flow.

My move is to walk through the dance floor bobbing my head and smiling at people on my way to and from the bathroom. I have to pee a lot if I'm drinking so anybody I'm with will catch me out there a couple times and think I'm dancing. I smell like a genius.

This. Start small. Soak up the rhythm. Keep doing it for a while. Just bob your head to the rhythm. Keep doing it for a while. Start bending your knees to the rhythm. Keep doing it for a while. Bend your spine sidways to the rhythm (

Spoiler

this implies moving your ass (and shoulders)

). Keep doing it for a while. And so on.

Don't use rhythm games. Don't use rhythm games. Don't use rhythms games. Don't use "rhythm" games.

Borrow moves from them, and use them in something you want to dance to. But nobody dances like that naturally or professionally on stage.

But dancing is all about rhythm. (This is also why your tonal deficiencies don't matter on the subject, OP.)
I think OP would benefit from playing something like Rhythm Paradise to get better at identifying rhythm.

Spoiler

RHYTHM.