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Experimenting with Sexuality

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J

jdforge

Banned
I've noticed that there are quite a few open minded folk on this Forum, and I'd just like to share something with you all. I guess I want to talk about this to someone, and GAF seems as good a place as any.

Since my university days, and one night in particular where a housemate made a very obvious approach towards me (which I declined), I've been increasingly aware of a desire to have some same sex encounters.

Last night I had such an encounter with another like minded individual, who is also in the very early stages of experimentation. While I wasn't blown away by the experience, I did feel very comfortable with it, and can honestly say that I will do it again.

Now.... this is where I start to have some issues.


To anyone who has been here before me - Do you have any pearls of wisdom as to how to handle this situation. Should I continue seeing this one person and run the risk/reap the rewards of developing a bond or should I try and meet other randoms ?

I wouldn't say my head is up my ass thinking about it all - But I am finding it difficult to work out what my next move should be.

I am not currently in a relationship, although I do have a regular partner. This does leave me quite free to find out more about this side of myself.
 
G

gofreak

GAF's Bob Woodward
needlejuice said:
Should I continue seeing this one person and run the risk/reap the rewards of developing a bond or should I try and meet other randoms ?
Click to expand...

It's probably a matter of opinion, but random anonymous sex might not be a good idea on a number of levels, certainly from a health perspective. If you liked the person you've experimented with, it might not be so bad to stick with them, and get to know each others likes and dislikes and what makes the other tick. First sex isn't always mindblowing, but with practise..

Always play safe, of course. Have fun! :)
 
Z

Zaptruder

Banned
Are you female?

Actually, I don't want to know, I'll just pretend you are, and fantasize about that tonight.

And to prevent you from letting me know better, I'm putting you on ignore.
 
S

silver

Banned
needlejuice said:
I've noticed that there are quite a few open minded folk on this Forum, and I'd just like to share something with you all. I guess I want to talk about this to someone, and GAF seems as good a place as any.

Since my university days, and one night in particular where a housemate made a very obvious approach towards me (which I declined), I've been increasingly aware of a desire to have some same sex encounters.

Last night I had such an encounter with another like minded individual, who is also in the very early stages of experimentation. While I wasn't blown away by the experience, I did feel very comfortable with it, and can honestly say that I will do it again.

Now.... this is where I start to have some issues.


To anyone who has been here before me - Do you have any pearls of wisdom as to how to handle this situation. Should I continue seeing this one person and run the risk/reap the rewards of developing a bond or should I try and meet other randoms ?

I wouldn't say my head is up my ass thinking about it all - But I am finding it difficult to work out what my next move should be.

I am not currently in a relationship, although I do have a regular partner. This does leave me quite free to find out more about this side of myself.
Click to expand...

I say meet other randoms for now. You're still experimenting, get some more experience with other people. Everyone's different.

And good for you by the way. I like open-minded people.
 
D

Drexon

Banned
Sexuality is what you allow yourself to do, not what society tells you what to do.

A lot of heterosexuals on this planet are molded into that sexual profile because of society. Not blaming 'em, just saying it's a shame (that's how open minded I am :p). I think it was in ancient greece that it was socially acceptible and supported that males had homosexual partners on the side of their wifes, to ease sexual pressure. Women was for your children, and probably for making food and all that house mom stuff. The way it worked was that male simply was programmed into bisexuality by society, like we (well, most of the time) are programmed into heterosexuality. I haven't read up on much of this or have had a lot (or even little) experience so I won't say the all time cliché "It's natural", because there's no such thing as natural when it comes to sexuality, there's only the norm.

In any case, the only aspect I think you should consider about this is are you willing to risc you social status if they're not as open minded as they should be? Only q, that's it. :) Won't say go for it, won't say 'Don't turn teh gay man!!11'. But if it was me in your shoes (in terms of do I like it or not), and I could keep it a secret (I think that matters), I'd go for it. :)
 
J

jdforge

Banned
Not many opinions being voiced here - A first for GAF ? Or maybe the subject matter just aint that interesting. Well whatever, I've pretty much decided to meet some other randoms, whilst also investing in the person I met last night.

I don't think I'm being greedy - But I can appreciate how some people can misrepresent my actions, and formulate that conclusion. But to understand the desire to experiment with both sexes, can really only be gained from those that do...


Being open minded about sexuality is quite liberating, but I realise it's not all sugar and spice. But I'm determined to enjoy it none the less.
 
T

teh_pwn

"Saturated fat causes heart disease as much as Brawndo is what plants crave."
Not many opinions being voiced here - A first for GAF ? Or maybe the subject matter just aint that interesting.
Click to expand...

Many of us have open minds because we hate those that attack gays because of their ignorant beliefs. It's not a personal thing.

You may see me in many threads defending sexuality against arrogant pricks, like that Love in Action crap, but that's because I'm a believer in human rights.

When Terri Shaivo was all over this place, I was outraged by how she was being whored out and Bush claimed to be a defender of human rights/life when he created a law that pulled the plug on a black baby in Texas against the will of the mother. Did the press talk about that? Hell no they didn't.

IMO, trying random people sounds kind of stupid. Whatever you do, do it safe.
 
J

Jacobi

Banned
Drexon said:
A lot of heterosexuals on this planet are molded into that sexual profile because of society. Not blaming 'em, just saying it's a shame (that's how open minded I am :p). I think it was in ancient greece that it was socially acceptible and supported that males had homosexual partners on the side of their wifes, to ease sexual pressure.
Click to expand...
Well but it was also legal in ancient Greece to "love" kids. But whatever I'll STFU before some people will scream "stoopid homofobe" again.
 
D

Drexon

Banned
Jacobi said:
Well but it was also legal in ancient Greece to "love" kids. But whatever I'll STFU before some people will scream "stoopid homofobe" again.
Click to expand...
Haha, I didn't know that. *deleted text*

Needle> Be safe, cannot be stressed enough. Luke, I am your father, use a condom!

Edit: Nah, I won't type that. :)
 
A

aoi tsuki

Member
Last night I had such an encounter with another like minded individual, who is also in the very early stages of experimentation. While I wasn't blown away by the experience, I did feel very comfortable with it, and can honestly say that I will do it again.
Click to expand...
The closest i've come to this situation is dating one woman then becoming interested in a second, so i'm not really a good judge, but here's my opinion.

i'd say stick with this person, and see how the relationship develops. i don't see how dating/fucking random other individuals of the same gender will help you pin down your sexuality, if that's what you're looking to do. As long as the two of you are honest and clear about the expectations of your relationship, continue with it as long as you feel comfortable.

On the note of announcing your bisexuality, read this account i posted from a similar thread: http://forum.gaming-age.com/showpost.php?p=1512551&postcount=29.
 
W

WrathOfOtaibah

Banned
I thought it was the Romans that accepted pedophilia.

As for me, I wasn't told by society to be straight. In fact, for most of my youth, I was in advanced classes where the norm was criticized (which YES, was a bad thing) but I still didn't care for men at all. If I did, then I wouldn't give a fuck and pursue whatever was on my mind. The only adventuring I'll be doing is with women and women only. There's too many hot chicks out there to be thinking about dicks.

Good luck with your sexual adventures.
 
J

jdforge

Banned
aoi tsuki said:
On the note of announcing your bisexuality, read this account i posted from a similar thread: http://forum.gaming-age.com/showpost.php?p=1512551&postcount=29.
Click to expand...


I doubt I will be announcing my bi-sexuality to any of my friends. That guys story is quite alarming, but what I do sexually is between me and the other person - My friends don't come into the equation. I'm not going out of my way to hide it, but it's on a need to know basis.

I think that having someone close who thinks and feels the same is possibly the best course of action. I am looking forward to being able to share my "normal" life and my "other" life with someone - And my whole outlook on this issue is based on friendship. If I decided to "commit" to this person, I will include them in my "normal" life, mix with my friends and family - I don't want to keep a person that I have an emotional attachment to hidden in the shadows, like a dirty secret.
 
A

Alyssa Hu$tle

Member
You don’t have to make a set choice either way, just let what happens, happen naturally, and do what feels right. If you liked this person and enjoyed the encounter, there is no harm in seeing them again. If someone else pops up along the way, well why not? I don’t think you have to make a firm decision either way rather go with the flow.

I only suggest you let your rendezvous partner (s) know exactly where things are at so you don’t lead them on, and just always remember safe sex, no matter who you are with. You don’t want to make a stupid mistake that takes away all your future choices, forever.
 
A

AssMan

Banned
moonrapersm.jpg
 
D

Drexon

Banned
I'll do a 180 on this one. As much as I support homo and bisexuality there will always be complications in social life. So therefore I regret to announce that I don't condone turning anything else than straight when you actually have a choice.

I'm purely using logic here, Vulcans were truely the masters of the universe. Logically, you should think ahead of time and consider what implications a theoretical homo or bisexual life will have not only to your social life, but to your personality, your life in general. What I see is a potential good start, you fool around a little, gets some life experience, but sooner or later you'll have to make a choice that'll probably affect you in a much greater sense than you probably could imagine. And the sooner that choice is made, the better.

Logic, and in most peoples cases, experience, tells us that anything other than the norm is to be treated differently. Sure, people, like on this forum, are getting better at not discriminating those people, but I'm sorry to say that if you even for an instance think that humanity, and thus your life, will change for the better, then... well.

My suggestion is to not rush things. If your homosexual experience partner in some way pressures you into making a choice (I don't see that happening though) you'll know that you've waited too long and you need to wait some more before maybe being pressured into making a far to big decision in far to little time, that's how you get screwed up (you probably have some examples of what I'm talking about in your head).

So take your time, don't wing a decision like this and whatever decision you make, always use a condom. :) PEACE OUT! *Smashes guitar*
 
R

Ryck

Member
Zaptruder said:
Are you female?

Actually, I don't want to know, I'll just pretend you are, and fantasize about that tonight.

And to prevent you from letting me know better, I'm putting you on ignore.
Click to expand...
He's a dude!!!!

[edit] Since Zaptruder put him on ignore! and for no other reason jeez
 
A

AssMan

Banned
I didn't know maturity levels could reach absolute zero in normal enviorments.
Click to expand...


It's not okay to joke about gays, but it's okay to make fun of mentally/physically challenged here on GAF. It's the liberal way. =P
 
S

Slurpy

*drowns in jizz*
Whats that quote about being open-minded, but not so open-minded that your brains fall out? I subscribe to that quote. If you're attracted to women- why the hell not just stick with that? Are there not enough on the planet or something?
 
V

Vormund

Member
AssMan said:
It's not okay to joke about gays, but it's okay to make fun of mentally/physically challenged here on GAF. It's the liberal way. =P
Click to expand...

It's because we're overrun with gay people here.

Always make fun of the minority. So who is the spastic here?

(waits for some one to say "it's yuo OMG LOL AM I RITE?!"}
 
C

CabbageRed

Member
Is it the 60's? ;) I cannot imagine that jumping in random sex is all that good of an idea for health reasons alone. As someone else mentioned, be safe and make sure you are up front about your intentions. Again, though, I'd say stick with whomever you choose and see what happens.
 
Z

Zensetsu

Member
Divus Masterei said:
Yes, that is true for those who've power... for those the law does not apply to :D.
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DON'T ROCK THE BOAT MAN, THEY'RE LISTENING!

But seriously to the original poster: Sit down and think for a while....are you actually interested, are you simply curious or are you just a horny bugger? Also take into account other people...say you hook up with some guy - what to him seems to be the beggining of a relationship is to you a dalliance or diversion. Thats pretty tight.

No-one else can really make a judgement on this that is worth listening to, but its my oppinion that you should seriously think about the personal boundaries you wil cross and the consequences of your actions before you do something like this.
 
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