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Fake GAF 2014: Welcome to the Sahara

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B

BlueBadger

Banned
Windam said:
Don't lie to me. That dramatic reading last night.. some of you smell like fish markets.

I didn't panic but I didn't talk either. Teach me the ways. She was totally my type physically.



Good thing my resting face looks like I found the guy who ran over my puppy.
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LOL you scary.
 
W

WhereAreMahDragonz

Banned
Windam said:
I didn't panic but I didn't talk either. Teach me the ways. She was totally my type physically.
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How To Get a Girl: A Lesson from A Lady

Congratulations! If you're reading this, then that means that you have started the human mating ritual. This guide will teach you how to get women, without fail. As a lady myself, I can confirm that these techniques are 100% effective into scoring with these dangerous and exotic creatures. Love is a mystery to many, but in reality, it's not so complicated. Follow this guide to the letter and you will be drowned in pieces of paper that hundreds, if not thousands of women have written their phone numbers on.

Step I: Appearance

They say that personality is the most important factor when trying to attract a mate, but what is personality without first looking the part? I'm going to be frank with you here, this is the hardest part. To find a style that works best for you will take time and patience, but I know a shortcut. It's simple. All you have to do is get one of these bad boys:

fedora.jpg


Bam. With this, you will instantly be a chick magnet. No woman will be able to resist that broad rim, that supple fabric, the silk in the interior. This item is a game changer.

The next item that you need is this:

FB_Purple-Popped-Collar.jpg


Any shirt with a collar will do, really. Just pop it up and you'll be a fly motherfucker.

Oh, and most importantly, you'll need a pair of these:

RayBan-Aviators.jpg


How fucking sexy is that? Unf. I'm actually going to need a moment to myself before writing out step two.

*BRIEF INTERMISSION*

Step II: Talking to Girls

Welcome back! Assuming that you have acquired all of the above items, you are now ready to actually begin talking to women. There's one thing you have to remember: girls can smell fear. Stay calm, relaxed, and confident. Show off your muscles as you converse with the ladies.

Don't forget pick up lines either! Some good examples:

"Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package."

"I love my bed but I'd rather be in yours."

"I know a great way to burn off the calories in that pastry you just ate."

The list goes on and on! These are just a few great possible conversation starters. Once you've got her hooked, she won't be able to turn you away!

Step III: The Date

Assuming you've followed the guide up to this point, you have now attracted a lady and are ready to take her out! All you have to do is to take her to the cheapest possible place you can think of. McDonald's is a great place for a first date.

During the outing, talk only about yourself and don't let her say anything. After all, that's why she's here, right? She obviously wants to know more about you, so don't let her down!

Conclusion

You now have all the skills you'll need to get a girlfriend. Go get 'em, tiger!
 
Celestial Mortal

Celestial Mortal

Member
Tence said:
Pretty much actually. Took me a while to figure it out.

Also: Don't be afraid to be rejected. Fear of rejection reeeeaaaaalllyyy holds you back.
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Fear of rejection has always held me back, but that too after asking a few of the girls out lol

WhereAreMahDragonz said:
If you were to talk to all the girls in FPF, I'm sure they would agree with me.
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But...what if...a girl likes something else than Aviators D:
 
NinjaBoiX

NinjaBoiX

Member
"Hey ladies,
(yeah!)
Hey fellas,
(yeah!)
You know you're doing good cause they're jealous,
They wanna hate you cause you're a go-getter,
Pop ya collar,
Don't let 'em sweat ya,"

And apparently Usher never lies.

I read it somewhere.
 
S

Smiley90

Stop shitting on my team. Start shitting on my finger.
Prophet Steve said:
There is not enough redpill advice right there, how can you possibly hook a girl that way!?
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You get that crap out of here, that's what we have Dating-Age for already.

Also I have aviators :( but since I stopped wearing glasses I can't really wear sunglasses anymore.

Also MORNING YOU CLEAN SMELLING FOLKS
 
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