GAF Anonymous Confessions thread 4.0 the last huzzah

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You do know how this works right?
You send an email through an anonymizer (or not, I haven't spilled anyone's secret yet, though some of you I know who you are) to gafconfess@gmail.com

Then no one can tie it to your Gaf account or anything.

Think of all the brave men and women that have gone before you for our entertainment! Are you a member of GAF or are you a member of GAF?!

This thread is ingenious and a solid job all around, but no thanks. I've been "hacked" recently and bit paranoid now but even without it I wouldn't confess. When a person who "loves" you is shocked and leaves you - yeah after that you don't go and tell other people about those things.
 
I finally received a job offer. While I am very glad to have work, there was an aspect of the process that I found disturbing. This won't be news to most US members, but the finalization of the job offer is contingent on passing a drug test. Now, I have no doubt that I will pass. I've never taken any illegal substances, smoked a cigarette, or consumed alcohol.

You see, that's part of what bothers me: the presumption of guilt. My record is spotless. My driving record is clean. And yet, speaking with the manager, it was made clear to me that I was guilty until proven innocent. If I didn't take the test within 48 hours, it was going to be assumed that I was avoiding the test out of guilt. I looked the manager in the eye and said with all honesty, "I know that you can't simply take my word for it, but I've never taken anything." I gave an embarrassed smile. She responded with a look of skepticism.

The other aspect of this that bothers me is that it's such a profound violation of privacy. Maybe it's different for males, but as a female, I found the entire process to be very uncomfortable and degrading. I was not comfortable discussing the drug screening with my future employer, nor did it help that the doctor was male. I find it deeply disturbing that this trend was ever permitted to insinuate itself into the American workplace in such a pervasive manner.

Of course I understood that retailers conduct drug screening. What I didn't realize is that every single prospective employee falls under suspicion--regardless of criminal background or lack thereof--and therefore needs to be subjected to the criminally invasive process of pre-employment drug screening.

As I said, I didn't dismiss this opportunity. I need the work. I don't need anyone else talking down to me because I don't have a job. (I've had friends with jobs their parents found for them speak to me in a condescending tone.) But I didn't mention the drug screening to my family. I know that they would pressure me to give up this position if they found out.

I'm curious as to how non-US members feel about this situation. Based on what I've read, this practice is not at all common in other parts of the world, including Europe and Canada. This and other normalized abuses of authority (i.e., corporal punishment, etc.) really make me question how much I value my US citizenship. I don't think I can remain in a country that condones this manner of conduct.
Before I comment I need to know if you ingested any illegal substances before you wrote this. It seems mighty suspicious.
 
I used to date a fairly active member on GAF about 3 or so years ago and I'm constantly amused at the way he, till this very day, will bring me up as often as he can and if he's not painting me in some awful light, he's lying about something else he never did. He has no idea I read the boards or that I even know what GAF is but I'd love to see his reaction if he only knew.

Oh wow! Didn't realize this thread existed.

No way I'm gonna confess the biggest secrets. I confessed once to my girlfriend, then she became my ex-girlfriend. Never again.

hmm...
 
I am so confused by this last one. What exactly is the problem with a drug test?

I don't think it's as big a deal as the confessor does, but I think she makes her points well. There's no probable cause; every successful applicant is treated like a drug user. It's an ideological difference.

I had to get one done on friday, and unless the poppy seed bagel I ate 4 days prior was still in my system I would have passed easily. Still felt weird taking one
although the technician/doctor/whatever was smokin' hot
 
Wouldn't fucking raw meat open up the possibilities of a large range of diseases? Salmonella, E. Coli?


Also, Ronito.. if you ever get too disgusted to continue on, I have no problems continuing the legacy of the confessions thread for you... a man can only read so much before he disappears into a pit of darkness. Keep me in mind if it ever gets to be too much.
 
I don't know why the doctor being male would make her uncomfortable unless he had a waterworks fetish or something. It's not like he's watching her.
 
Wouldn't fucking raw meat open up the possibilities of a large range of diseases? Salmonella, E. Coli?


Also, Ronito.. if you ever get too disgusted to continue on, I have no problems continuing the legacy of the confessions thread for you... a man can only read so much before he disappears into a pit of darkness. Keep me in mind if it ever gets to be too much.

Why should GAF trust you with their secrets? You're not even a real doctor.
 
This isn't anonymous, but I'll confess it anyway. I've secretly been naming the images from my avatar things referencing people or things on NeoGAF for a while now. Not all of them are NeoGAF related, mostly just silly things.

Here is a list of the things I've named the files.

"my plan to rule this thread will now begin 4kids dubs being superior"
"people tell me arceus is dead but they are wrong"
"gravijah im more than just a hime"
"it's a hard knock life pokerus"
"Turtle Pokemon are the worst"
"Gravijah I know all your secrets"
"I know you're reading this please help me"
"Gravijah likes squids"
"so you think you can play childrens card games"

There are more than this, but these are all the ones I had saved still.
 
So there's no need to anonymize this one (it's me guys)

So I grew up in the states and my cousins were in Venezuela. The main ones we'd visit were two sisters that were about 2 years older than me. When we'd go to visit I'd always felt that they were sorta more affectionate with me and my brothers than usual especially my older brother. For example, last time I went to visit them I got a full on lip kiss for several seconds as a greeting they spent all the remaining time talking with/fawning over my older brother.

Anyhoo, fast forward a good long while. One of those cousins finds me on facebook. Cool. We share info and all this stuff. Find her sister. Ok. Also cool. Then after a few weeks later she posts a pic of her husband.

He looks just eerily similar my older brother.

Creeeeepy.
 
So there's no need to anonymize this one (it's me guys)

So I grew up in the states and my cousins were in Venezuela. The main ones we'd visit were two sisters that were about 2 years older than me. When we'd go to visit I'd always felt that they were sorta more affectionate with me and my brothers than usual especially my older brother. For example, last time I went to visit them I got a full on lip kiss for several seconds as a greeting they spent all the remaining time talking with/fawning over my older brother.

Anyhoo, fast forward a good long while. One of those cousins finds me on facebook. Cool. We share info and all this stuff. Find her sister. Ok. Also cool. Then after a few weeks later she posts a pic of her husband.

He looks just eerily similar my older brother.

Creeeeepy.

But were they hot? This is GAF, it's all anyone would care about.

But seriously, that's weird.
 
Later on, the other cousin will post a picture of her husband - and he'll look just like you but with a moustache.

tumblr_kqqeyzz6Ny1qz4wylo1_500.png
 
So there's no need to anonymize this one (it's me guys)

So I grew up in the states and my cousins were in Venezuela. The main ones we'd visit were two sisters that were about 2 years older than me. When we'd go to visit I'd always felt that they were sorta more affectionate with me and my brothers than usual especially my older brother. For example, last time I went to visit them I got a full on lip kiss for several seconds as a greeting they spent all the remaining time talking with/fawning over my older brother.

Anyhoo, fast forward a good long while. One of those cousins finds me on facebook. Cool. We share info and all this stuff. Find her sister. Ok. Also cool. Then after a few weeks later she posts a pic of her husband.

He looks just eerily similar my older brother.

Creeeeepy.

You didn't fuck your cousins? That's a pretty tame confession, Ronito.
 
So there's no need to anonymize this one (it's me guys)

So I grew up in the states and my cousins were in Venezuela. The main ones we'd visit were two sisters that were about 2 years older than me. When we'd go to visit I'd always felt that they were sorta more affectionate with me and my brothers than usual especially my older brother. For example, last time I went to visit them I got a full on lip kiss for several seconds as a greeting they spent all the remaining time talking with/fawning over my older brother.

Anyhoo, fast forward a good long while. One of those cousins finds me on facebook. Cool. We share info and all this stuff. Find her sister. Ok. Also cool. Then after a few weeks later she posts a pic of her husband.

He looks just eerily similar my older brother.

Creeeeepy.

Not that this will make it any better but isn't there an observation that girls tend to be attracted to guys who resemble the girls' father and vice versa with guys and mothers? I have dated three half asian girls before and I've noticed that all three of them have east asian heredity through their fathers. For myself, I tend to gravitate towards strong, independent, and confident women. Coincidentally, I grew up with a single parent and my mom barely had anything when she raised me.
 
Not that this will make it any better but isn't there an observation out girls tend to be attracted to guys who resemble the girls' father and vice versa with guys and mothers? I have dated three half asian girls before and I've noticed that all three of them have asian heredity through their fathers. I'm going to be opening a can of worms here but I tend to gravitate towards strong, independent, and confident women. Coincidentally, I grew up with a single parent and my mom barely had anything when she raised me.

Yeah, it's a thing.
 
Here's an extremely boring one. I don't care for fruit as an ingredient for hot dishes besides desserts. In fact, I hate any kind of fruit item used on any cooked food even when the fruit wasn't cooked with it.

Fuck your cranberry sauce during turkey dinners. Gravy is all I need. Fuck your blueberries and strawberries etc in muffins or on pancakes.
 
Confessions, so quick and dirty, the way I like it.

1) I want to have a threesome with a mom and daughter combo. I could die happy then.

2) I once stole an armrest from a movie theater because the movie sucked, the theater was dusty, and the arm rest fell off the chair halfway during the film.

3) I've cheated and I don't feel guilty at all. I used to feel guilty just looking at other women.
I don't get the whole mother/daughter fantasy thing.
 
I've been dating my gf for a few months. And the sex is great, though she is pretty vanilla if you leave it up to her. She has no problem trying new things (porn, anal, toys, etc) and enjoys it when I instigate it. But if I left it up to her it'd be missionary position sex all the time every time. She's great on other fronts but I do have to admit I'm used to girls who are a bit more creative/aggressive.

The other day after fooling around I said we should share our sexual fantasies and she said she didn't have any. I thought she was being shy or something. But after talking to her I realized it's true she really doesn't have a single one.

I'm pretty freaked out. As a guy I have plenty of fantasies. And the girls I've dated before all had fantasies too. The fact that she doesn't and is so vanilla when it comes to sex has me worried. Should I worry or is this normal? Everything else about her is perfect but this worries me. Should I run?

It's a shame that almost no one replies to the questions I ask in reply to their confessions because I'm willing to bet that your girl was raised in a very religious environment. People I've met from those areas tend to be very repressed sexually and it leads to all kinds of problems.

At first I was going to say that porn is a good way to get creativity flowing and with that fantasies. But you've already said you do that. I have met people that are just asexual. But that doesn't seem the case here either because you say that sex is great so long as you start it.

As a guy, I can't speak to how women fantasize or not about sex. Truth be told with women that I've spoken to about sex by far most of them have at least some sort of fantasy. Of course that might be a by-product of the people I hang with and people's strange propensity to confess to me. So I might not be a good person to ask. Girl-gaf can you help this guy out? Is it normal for a woman to not have any sexual fantasies at all?

As to whether or not to keep the relationship, I don't know. To me sexual stuff is really some the easiest stuff to work through so long as you guys work together on it. And it seems she's willing to have fun and try new things so long as you drive them. However, I will point out if one person stops communicating or trying the whole thing falls apart. When the sex is good it's 10% of the relationship, when it's bad it's 90%.

If you feel that her "vanilla-ness" is something that will never change and it will drive you crazy you have to make that decision for yourself.
 
I fantasize all the time so I'm no help here. But if the sex is good and she's willing to try things with you I'd say be happy
 
The girl I'm seeing just told me she had a threesome with two guys. I can't look at her anymore without seeing her getting plowed by two guys. It disgusts me.

How funny that this one follows the last confession. Your girls is too adventurous while the other is not enough. You guys should trade.

But seriously dude. If she had said she had a threesome with two other chicks or another chick and a guy you'd be all over that. Don't be "that guy" sheesh.
 
How funny that this one follows the last confession. Your girls is too adventurous while the other is not enough. You guys should trade.

But seriously dude. If she had said she had a threesome with two other chicks or another chick and a guy you'd be all over that. Don't be "that guy" sheesh.

Personally I'm all for adventurous chicks, but I'm also the kinda guy that doesn't want to know about that time she went ass to mouth...other guys draw that line much closer to vanilla.
 
It's a shame that almost no one replies to the questions I ask in reply to their confessions because I'm willing to bet that your girl was raised in a very religious environment. People I've met from those areas tend to be very repressed sexually and it leads to all kinds of problems.

At first I was going to say that porn is a good way to get creativity flowing and with that fantasies. But you've already said you do that. I have met people that are just asexual. But that doesn't seem the case here either because you say that sex is great so long as you start it.

As a guy, I can't speak to how women fantasize or not about sex. Truth be told with women that I've spoken to about sex by far most of them have at least some sort of fantasy. Of course that might be a by-product of the people I hang with and people's strange propensity to confess to me. So I might not be a good person to ask. Girl-gaf can you help this guy out? Is it normal for a woman to not have any sexual fantasies at all?

As to whether or not to keep the relationship, I don't know. To me sexual stuff is really some the easiest stuff to work through so long as you guys work together on it. And it seems she's willing to have fun and try new things so long as you drive them. However, I will point out if one person stops communicating or trying the whole thing falls apart. When the sex is good it's 10% of the relationship, when it's bad it's 90%.

If you feel that her "vanilla-ness" is something that will never change and it will drive you crazy you have to make that decision for yourself.

You could always ask her to try and fantasize. Or maybe she just enjoys it when you take control.
 
What if her fantasy is so weird and out there that she's just too embarrassed to even word it out loud?

I think I might've told the story here about my friend who was freaked because she looked on her fiance's computer and didn't find any porn. It freaked her out because she said it either meant that he didn't look at porn at all, which was strange, or he was into such freaky stuff that he cleared every possible trace of it.

That might be the case here. But if she is really that vanilla in bed. That seems unlikely. Freaky people tend to be freaky in bed. It's not uncommon to hear about people that are shy to be freaks in bed but I've yet to hear about someone who's vanilla in bed being a secret freak.
 
I think I might've told the story here about my friend who was freaked because she looked on her fiance's computer and didn't find any porn. It freaked her out because she said it either meant that he didn't look at porn at all, which was strange, or he was into such freaky stuff that he cleared every possible trace of it.

That might be the case here. But if she is really that vanilla in bed. That seems unlikely. Freaky people tend to be freaky in bed. It's not uncommon to hear about people that are shy to be freaks in bed but I've yet to hear about someone who's vanilla in bed being a secret freak.

Well, that does seem logically sound.

Hey Anonymous Confessor, if you don't want her, can I ask her out?
 
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