Gamepro and PSM: Tied for the worst fucking game magazines ever (p.s. never read NP)

i was reading through a couple older (like, 3 months old) issues of PSM and gamepro on my lunch break. i get the subscriptions for free but often dont have time to really read through them. anyways, so i'm reading through, and the writing in these magazines are a fucking joke. horrible puns, lame jokes and just a very childish, retarded feel. a childish retard is what i'm trying to say. it's funny to read a preview from september where gamepro or psm are complimenting a game and saying stupid ass things like "with a little polish, this game could be just what GC fans are looking for!" EVERY.FUCKING.PREVIEW!

it reminds me of the bullshit NFL Films team yearbooks. no matter how bad a team is, the writers kiss ass and say "The '98 bengals look to be a team... on the prowl!" and stupid shit like that.

my question is this: has there or will there ever be a worse magazine than one of these two? i don't read nintendo power by the way, but i hear bad things about them too. EGM isn't 100% awesome, but i've found myself laughing at some EGM jokes (for instance, they have a picture of The End from mgs3 and a caption that reads "he has a pocket full of weathers originals". i find that funny.

what i dont find funny is when some lame fuck reader writes in to gamepro and says "I just saw your preview entitled "You say you want a revolution?" I LOVE THE BEATLES! YOU GUYS ROCK IT!"

then gamepro responds with an entire paragraph comprised of beatles song titles. so fucking lame. thats my rant for the day ladies!
 
What about EGM and OPM with their endless fucking lists. How about writing an article for once people? The only good gaming magazine is Game Developer.
 
Legal Step said:
What about EGM and OPM with their endless fucking lists. How about writing an article for once people? The only good gaming magazine is Game Developer.

i've been meaning to check out game developer for a while now. how much is a subscription?
 
what i dont find funny is when some lame fuck reader writes in to gamepro and says "I just saw your preview entitled "You say you want a revolution?" I LOVE THE BEATLES! YOU GUYS ROCK IT!"

then gamepro responds with an entire paragraph comprised of beatles song titles.

Wait. Did this actually happen?
 
yes, the beatles thing ACTUALLY happened. infact, because it pissed me off so much i'm going to go grad the magazine and type out the entire fucking thing. what a joke, brb
 
from the November 2004 issue of gamepro: (sorry about the misspellings, grammatical errors and non capitalization in spots, i typed this up quick)

"I recently read in issue 192 of Gamepro the line "You Say You Want A Revolution?" I love the beatles. I love you for having that line in your magazine. I think you should put more Beatles quotes and lyrics into your magazine. In fact, I would appreciate it if you stopped covering video games and just became BeatlePro. Or, alternatively, begin production on a Beatles video game. As Paul McCartney, you would make the opponents dance with melodic bass lines a la "I Saw her standing there". As George Harrison, you could power up guitar solos, and, of course, as john lennon you would simply blow peoples minds with lyrics from "I Am the Walrus." Ring... he could... uh, promote apple juice in Japan. Also, the game would have a dynamic simulator where you would chase through different worlds in the Yellow Submarine. Also, the game would follow the side story of Rocky Raccoon, but that's more for multiplayer.

* Phil - Portland, OR

answer:

Phil... goin old school. When your letter arrived "Yesterday," we wondered: Is "This Boy" a "Day Tripper," a "nowhere man" or just "The fool on the hill?" But "Til there was you", no one has ever pitched the brilliant idea of a Beatles game. There's "Something" to it, but making it "come together" likely faces "The long and winding road." Obtaining the rights "all together onw" for beatles intellectual propery would require a "Hard days night" "Eight days a week". Its a real "Octopuses Garden" and no game publisher wants to "Carry that weight". Also, Michael ("Everybodys got something to hide except me and my monkey") Jackson still owns the rights to many Beatles tunes. "While my guitar gently weeps" thats just "too much monkey business". Unless "Baby, you're a rich man" "You can't do that". Beatlepro? "Tomorrow never knows." "The End."


fucking tools
 
I think that's kinda funny, actually.

Don't be such a hatar!

(Disclaimer: I used to work for GamePro, but almost everyone I worked with over there has left the company, so)

edit: I do agree about PSM's covers, though. Some were embarrassing, but at the very least the comic-book covers always stuck out compared to all the other magazines. Nowadays I think OPM's covers are the only ones that stand out, but you can't tell on the newsstand because they're in plastic bags anyways...
 
Serafitia said:
Darn, I used to really dig PSM back in the day. Back when they had comic book artists doing the covers.

I cried when they started putting the CGI generica on their covers about a couple of years ago. A requiem for the Kickin' Rad Joe Mad FFX cover
 
Redbeard said:
Does Gamepro still use the faces to rate games? And do they still have ProTips? :lol
No and yes (although the number's been going down over time).

It used to be roughly the same group of people that created GP from the mid-90s to 2003, but recently a lot of the old guard has left, either to other game mags or from the business in general. They had a redesign in 2003 that got rid of smiley faces, persona "portraits" and such, but it ended up making the mag look extremely bland. I think the team is talented, but they need one more redesign to get back into prime shape.
 
The industry desperately needs an authoritative, erudite publication written for adults that doesn't treat videogame development as a subject suitable only for pubescent kids with ADD.

Why did Next Generation fail anyway?
 
MassiveAttack said:
The industry desperately needs an authoritative, erudite publication written for adults that doesn't treat videogame development as a subject suitable only for pubescent kids with ADD.

Why did Next Generation fail anyway?

Because casuals didn't want an authoritative, erudite publication written for adults that doesn't treat videogame development as a subject suitable only for pubescent kids with ADD, apparently. They apparently wanted Maxim with 15x the gaming coverage (*coughEGMcough*)
 
MassiveAttack said:
Why did Next Generation fail anyway?
Advertising sales and circulation were off (down to about 115k, from ~300k in 1996), and Future was losing money hand and foot worldwide at the time thanks to unrelated issues, so they closed all of their underperforming magazines.

I'm sure every game magazine writer wants to make an adult-oriented magazine, but it's just this sort of adult audience that isn't inclined to buy a "game" magazine, which makes it difficult.

(I think I just gave a polite, reasoned version of belgurdo's post :lol)
 
belgurdo said:
I cried when they started putting the CGI generica on their covers about a couple of years ago. A requiem for the Kickin' Rad Joe Mad FFX cover

Yeah, but the MGS2 Snake cover?

/me's eyes roll to back of head

I used to be devoted to EGM, but once I started realizing their hype-whoreness, I promptly stopped. The issue: Vice City. I also used to read some Gamefan, always thought the import scene/anime stuff in there was cool, but I never knew where to buy it. It wasn't widely distributed.
 
MassiveAttack said:
The industry desperately needs an authoritative, erudite publication written for adults that doesn't treat videogame development as a subject suitable only for pubescent kids with ADD.

Why did Next Generation fail anyway?
Because Next Generation became NextGen, and in the process went from OK to elitist garbage. If you want development news, read Game Developer (if it's still around and doesn't suck).

NextGen's website and the "we stand by our review (even though it may be nonsensical)" attitude helped to drag it down, too. If I want pseudo-intellectual prattle I'll pick up the Village Voice.
 
PSM needs a XBN-style change. Their constant attempt at being 'funny' paired with the horrible layout makes it a difficult to read.
 
Pretty much all magazines suck, what else is new?

Gamepro's only redeeming feature in its history has been their arcade blowouts where they would detail every move in various fighting games. The rest of the magazine has always been an utter joke. Even the short-lived LamePro was uninspired at best.

I remember the old EGM, what an embarrassment. Every editorial they ever wrote was a Nintendo bash in one way or another. When Super Metroid came out, I remember they couldn't find bad things to say about the game, so they went on endless rants about how crappy the Nintendo corporate structure was and how they didn't get any privileges (they had to buy the games, unlike other companies, who would send them the games for review purposes, or something like that). Quartermann did his best to hype up Sega as much as possible back in the day... he came up with the most insane rumors to get the Sega fanboys excited... Even if biased, that was mildly entertaining. The current magazine is a pile of steaming crap (imho).

Next-Gen was so far up Sony's buttocks it wasn't even funny. I guess they had to make up for Sony depositing subscription cards in every PSX that was released back then. I loved the way they went back and changed N64 scores because they said "We changed our mind, the games weren't THAT good." They jerked off to stupid crap like Prey (which never even came out), and overall made themselves look like idiots. The one redeeming feature of the magazine was the game development article they sometimes put near the back.

GameFan... they had an awesome Japanese games section (except for that one time where some freak started cursing out everything Japanese). Too bad it almost seemed like a Nintendo infomercial at times. They were so enamoured with Nintendo sometimes that some of the ways they defended Nintendo were just utterly spectacular. Again, the only real thing they had was the awesome Japanese games coverage. I liked the editorials generally, since usually they were pretty balanced and focused more on the industry at large. The magazine was still a little too short though. Overall this was probably the best of the multi-platform games magazines.

Nintendo Power... back in the day this was an excellent magazine. I always trusted their review sections. They had absolutely sweet extras, and went all out in their previews. Their posters were really cool too. I think during the N64 era and afterwards, it became a kid's Pokemon Gazette. When I say that, I don't mean Pokemon was for kids. I mean the content in the magazine was geared towards little kids. There were no interesting discussions on strategies used within Pokemon battles, or even news on events that might take place around the area. The magazine in its current state looks like it was written by five year olds. The people who now run and work at Nintendo Power - in my experience - act only slightly older both in terms of their interpersonal skills and their writing ability. They don't even have January bonus issues anymore, and they treat their long-time subscriber base (people like me who have been members since the Nintendo Fun Club newsletter days) without much respect.

Sony's newsletters were not that bad. I always appreciated them because they were short, to the point, and free. They didn't sit and editorialize from what I remember. Even when N64 came out and some newbs thought that Sony was going to stop making games for Playstation (My god that was halarious!), they didn't target Nintendo in the newsletters, instead saying they want to provide a good gaming platform as well. I guess eventually the fan base got so large, that it made it difficult to maintain that. When I bought a PSX for 299, they were also kind enough to send me a free t-shirt, baseball cap, and demo disc for being an early adopter. I wish those people were still around, because even though Sony doesn't have a newsletter/magazine created internally, their current CSRs are incredibly lame and ever since that time period, seem to be filled with fanboys rather than people interested in the customer.

Sega Visions? No articles, just a bunch of random previews and big pictures to get you hyped up about Sega. I never took it seriously, but they did send it to me free for a couple of years.

The only magazine I have the slightest bit of respect for these days is XBN. Even if biased, their articles tend to be pretty good, and instead of turning their content into a pissing match, they make it a point to focus objectively on providing good content for their userbase. Sadly I've heard they are on the way out, but I don't know that for a fact. One of the nicest things about them is that they will even compliment other platforms for their respective strengths. It seems like a very mature group of people in general.

If I missed any relevant magazine let me know... I also remember receiving TuroGrafix16 newsletters and a pilot magazine that was coming out for it a long time ago. Don't really remember too much though. I have a huge library in my house where I have 3 shelves dedicated to gaming magazines. I'll look for it if anyone is interested.
 
tehrik-e-insaaf said:
The only magazine I have the slightest bit of respect for these days is XBN. Even if biased, their articles tend to be pretty good, and instead of turning their content into a pissing match, they make it a point to focus objectively on providing good content for their userbase. Sadly I've heard they are on the way out, but I don't know that for a fact. One of the nicest things about them is that they will even compliment other platforms for their respective strengths. It seems like a very mature group of people in general.

Thank you very much. Like the man said, we used to be blue, when we used to be new.

When we used to be clean.
 
I saw the dumbest PROTIP in the recent issue. In their review of Goldeneye:

PROTIP: If you have a full pack of grenades and you find one lying on the floor, find the next batch of badies and toss one their way. You can then pick up the one you found to fill up again.

Brilliant.... :lol
 
MassiveAttack said:
The industry desperately needs an authoritative, erudite publication written for adults that doesn't treat videogame development as a subject suitable only for pubescent kids with ADD.

Why did Next Generation fail anyway?

Dude, your avatar is nearly 4MB!
 
OH XBN WE HARDLY KNEW YE.

And I agree with FMT...out of the crap, these two are crappiest. NP seems like a children's mag, so I don't think that counts.
 
i've been meaning to check out game developer for a while now. how much is a subscription?

It's free if you're a developer but fairly costly if you're not. I'm not sure you'd get all that much of of it though, it's a fairly thin magazine. I don't know your background exactly but I'd wager while you'd like the post mortems and the occasional editor's note (which lately have been talking a lot about IGDA quality of life issues that only pertain to developers). A lot of the magazine is middlewear and productivity software reviews, programming and animation articles (based around the technical implementations) and various white papers disguised as columns. Basically if you're looking for a nice way to implement LERP routines into your animation systems or need the skinny on the benefits of sub-d over NURBS then its worth picking up.

Most of the good stuff gets posted on gamasutra anyway.
 
Lamepro has sucked since its first issue. Wasn't it the #1 circulated video game mag at one point? I don't know who can even read that trash. Worst review system, worst quality writing, worst layout...just the worst at everything. Seriously, you couldn't pay me to say anything nice about the rag. I got a free EGM sub, and that mag actually improved since I remember it from the early 90's. It's up to mid-90's NextGen quality now, but still not all that good.

All this discussion is pointless. The last piece of quality video game journalism died the day NGO was replaced with Daily Radar. NGO was free and they got all the good interviews and exclusives. Now it's a mishmash of crap. These forums have all the gaming news I need. PEACE.
 
I also wanted to give props to GameCritics (a website). I used to read it a couple of years ago. I enjoyed their reviews and articles.

Not sure how they have been doing the past few years, but they were always a good read.
 
What's with the EGM hate? It's the only mag I've been able to consitantly read over the past 7 years or so (due to either the horrible quality of ones like GamePro or undue cancellations of others), and even through several design and staff overhauls it has remained entertaining and informative.
 
Of All Trades said:
Because Next Generation became NextGen, and in the process went from OK to elitist garbage. If you want development news, read Game Developer (if it's still around and doesn't suck).

NextGen's website and the "we stand by our review (even though it may be nonsensical)" attitude helped to drag it down, too. If I want pseudo-intellectual prattle I'll pick up the Village Voice.

On point like a motherfucker...

Game mags in general haven't been relevant for years, and certainly haven't been worth my money. That's just the sad truth.
 
The Turbo magazine you are referring may have been Turboplay. It was (IMHO) the finest single format video game magazine. It was produced by the same guys that did Video Games & Computer Entertainment (the best multi-format video game mag ever), and the guys who did VG&CE came from ANALOG, which was a great Atari mag. Many of the older mags that covered home computers (80s) shit all over any of the game mags available today.
 
Agreed...Ace Magazine was Edge/Next Gen done five years prior, minus the elitest crap. And Zapp and C&VG were silly as hell, but at least they were legitimately funny.
 
PC Gaijin said:
The Turbo magazine you are referring may have been Turboplay. It was (IMHO) the finest single format video game magazine. It was produced by the same guys that did Video Games & Computer Entertainment (the best multi-format video game mag ever), and the guys who did VG&CE came from ANALOG, which was a great Atari mag.

I still have a bunch of back issues of VG&CE. Those still make for good reading. :)
 
I get all my mags free, but I'm interested in the Game Developers. How much is a yearly subscription?
 
DJPS2 said:
I still have a bunch of back issues of VG&CE. Those still make for good reading. :)

Same here. Last week when I was going through my old mags I found a bunch of those, Sega Visions, Electronic Games (before it became EGM, I think), GameFan and others... Good times....
 
mj1108 said:
Same here. Last week when I was going through my old mags I found a bunch of those, Sega Visions, Electronic Games (before it became EGM, I think), GameFan and others... Good times....

Heh... I have four bookshelves loaded with magazine back issues dated from 1989 to present, including EGM, GamePro, VG&CE, Nintendo Power, Game Players, Game Buyer, Incite, NEXT Generation, Game Informer, and more. It's a veritable library... but I need to reorganize it soon. :)
 
MassiveAttack said:
The industry desperately needs an authoritative, erudite publication written for adults that doesn't treat videogame development as a subject suitable only for pubescent kids with ADD.

Couldn't have said it better myself.
 
PSM got pretty good earlier this year, they had a streak of great exclusives. Best one being Devil May Cry 3. Then they got sorta lame again...

Gamepro is just crap, at least for people that go on game forums. There is never anything in there that all of us haven't known for weeks...sometimes months. And I never really enjoy any of their features.
 
There isnt any problem with PSM at all. I dont see how it is childish. The only gripe I have is that it is not as packed with content as when they first came out, they had even memory card stickers, t-shirt orders, etc. Really cool PS mag.

Gamepro I dont like. I think their cartoon avatars/characters they use make it "childish."
 
Since we all touched on gaming websites, which ones so far have filled the gap for the latest gaming news?

Aside from GAF, I usually go to Magicbox...questionable look, some spelling errors, too picds from other websites too often, but I'm not sure what else is out there.
 
Serafitia said:
Darn, I used to really dig PSM back in the day. Back when they had comic book artists doing the covers.
Agreed. I still have those covers.

Here's the Joe Mad cover in question. The thing that killed it was the editors. They would usually make covers suck by making the artist change the entire concept to fill in with little shitty graphics, more headlines, and tons more NEON.

They had some great Joe Mad Covers (screw you, haters!), but this was his worst.

psmgs.jpg


psmgs2.jpg
 
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